Feed Editor (Unlicensed) 12 Dec 2006 04:37:20 GMT Ever wonder what two Lesbians talk about when they get together? Well...wonder no more. The 2 Homos Lesbian podcast is the show with two Lesbians sitting around talking about whatever crosses our minds. We're not always politically correct, and no topic is off limits. Come spend some time and get intimate with us. We're open-minded, we speak our minds...and sometimes, for better or worse, there's no "edit" button. Enjoy the random observations of the 2 Homos Lesbian Podcast. http://www.2homos.com Creative Commons 2006 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Podcast, Comedy, Gay, Lesbian, LGBT, Dyke, Queer, Lesbian+podcast en 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) 2 Homos - Lesbian Podcast Ever wonder what two Lesbians talk about when they get together? Well...wonder no more. The 2 Homos Lesbian podcast is the show with two Lesbians sitting around talking about whatever crosses our minds. We're not always politically correct, and no topic is off limits. Come spend some time and get intimate with us. We're open-minded, we speak our minds...and sometimes, for better or worse, there's no "edit" button. Enjoy the random observations of the 2 Homos Lesbian Podcast. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Lesbian, Podcast, Gay, Queer, Transgender, Queen, Dyke, Lezzie, Homo, Lesbian moms, Gay parents, Gay parenting, Homosexual, LGBT Yes 2 Homos 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) http://www.2homos.com/graphics/homoslogo-large.jpg http://www.2homos.com/graphics/homoslogo-large.jpg The metamorphasis is complete. It took five long years. You started out as a card-carrying, black jeans wearing, country dancing Lesbian...and now you have become a baby bag carrying, play date organizing, suburban mini-van driving, Mommy. Almost all your freinds are straight moms, and you enjoy going to Mom's Night Out events. At least you still own a pair of black jeans. Thu, 1 March 2018 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2018-03-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 9cea128f-3bdc-49e9-989e-06827801d62e 652 Becoming Mommy The metamorphasis is complete. It took five long years. You started out as a card-carrying, black jeans wearing, country dancing Lesbian...and now you have become a baby bag carrying, play date organizing, suburban mini-van driving, Mommy. Almost all your freinds are straight moms, and you enjoy going to Mom's Night Out events. At least you still own a pair of black jeans. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian+mom, lesbian+moms, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:36 yes Donating your organs after you die can be one of the last altruistic you perform as a human being. Since you won't be using it anyway, why not leave your penis to some person that really needs it and can get a lot of good use out of it. While we're at it, I'd like to donate my period to someone that can use that, too. I'll also throw in a lifetime supplies of menstrual supplies at no cost to the lucky recipient. Sun, 22 May 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-05-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 9cea128f-3bdc-49e9-989e-06827801d62e 651 Organ Donor Donating your organs after you die can be one of the last altruistic you perform as a human being. Since you won't be using it anyway, why not leave your penis to some person that really needs it and can get a lot of good use out of it. While we're at it, I'd like to donate my period to someone that can use that, too. I'll also throw in a lifetime supplies of menstrual supplies at no cost to the lucky recipient. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 14:57 yes Fat pigs roasting in the sand...the sound of fat sizzling and cooking on the beach...the scent of coconut (suntan lotion) wafting through the air...Hawaiian shirts that looked good when you bought them, but that you'll never wear again... Is it a luau? Nope, its just tourists from the mainland on the beach getting sunburned in Hawaii. Aloha. Sun, 15 May 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-05-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 786542be-e470-4548-a4ff-c7440641b7dd 650 Aloha! Fat pigs roasting in the sand...the sound of fat sizzling and cooking on the beach...the scent of coconut (suntan lotion) wafting through the air...Hawaiian shirts that looked good when you bought them, but that you'll never wear again... Is it a luau? Nope, its just tourists from the mainland on the beach getting sunburned in Hawaii. Aloha. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 29:43 yes Some foods give you a clue that they are not good to eat. Sour Cream tells you exactly what you're getting when you look at the name. How can that be good? Now, Homo Milk, on the other hand....how can that be bad? Wed, 27 Apr 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-04-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast f48899b0-b844-4bfd-8041-d8d739c06436 649 Sour Cream Some foods give you a clue that they are not good to eat. Sour Cream tells you exactly what you're getting when you look at the name. How can that be good? Now, Homo Milk, on the other hand....how can that be bad? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:23 yes Not every Lesbian conforms to the usual stereotypes. Some Lesbians don't actually play softball, they don't watch football and they're not turned on by other Lesbians with sports injuries. Instead, they carry the gene for hoarding animals they find on the street. If the animal has injuries or requires extensive vet bills, all the better. Sun, 24 Apr 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-04-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast f0eafa1a-d19f-47e7-94b2-b90bd7c0f6f6 648 Soft Spot Not every Lesbian conforms to the usual stereotypes. Some Lesbians don't actually play softball, they don't watch football and they're not turned on by other Lesbians with sports injuries. Instead, they carry the gene for hoarding animals they find on the street. If the animal has injuries or requires extensive vet bills, all the better. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 16:09 yes Here we go again. A small, but vocal minority pushes to repeal the hard-won rights that LGBT people have recently gained in the South. If this keeps up, it's going to be a very long, very hot summer with Roxanne pissed off and angry again every single day. Please....don't let this happen. Wed, 20 Apr 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-04-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 9c51e729-c70b-4d6c-bac6-09a50f046d35 647 Pissed Off Again Here we go again. A small, but vocal minority pushes to repeal the hard-won rights that LGBT people have recently gained in the South. If this keeps up, it's going to be a very long, very hot summer with Roxanne pissed off and angry again every single day. Please....don't let this happen. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 13:58 yes Yes, it's true. The world really is conspiring against you to thwart all your efforts to get simple things done. Roadblocks are being intentionally put in your path to try and deter you from your mission. Now that you know that, there's only one thing to do. Take the advice of a not-so-famous three-year old and, "Try, try again, Mommy". Sun, 17 Apr 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-04-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 351faa31-a23b-4bb0-a652-8f56f349e838 646 Sticktoitiveness Yes, it's true. The world really is conspiring against you to thwart all your efforts to get simple things done. Roadblocks are being intentionally put in your path to try and deter you from your mission. Now that you know that, there's only one thing to do. Take the advice of a not-so-famous three-year old and, "Try, try again, Mommy". 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 18:42 yes It happens at the most inconvenient time. It's never when you expect it. It hangs around endlessly and it takes longer to leave than you planned for. There's never a good way to get rid of it and it never gets a clue. It's not actually herpes, it's just the lonely neighbor renting the guesthouse in the backyard. Wed, 13 Apr 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-04-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast db43d64c-e457-477f-b283-477bc2bf53f1 645 Frequent Flareups It happens at the most inconvenient time. It's never when you expect it. It hangs around endlessly and it takes longer to leave than you planned for. There's never a good way to get rid of it and it never gets a clue. It's not actually herpes, it's just the lonely neighbor renting the guesthouse in the backyard. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 13:38 yes In the event of a global nuclear war the only surviving life will be cockroaches and rats. Of course, there's no need to wait until Armageddon strikes. Rats and roaches are living in every house in America. They're sleeping right next to you, walking freely around your house, eating your food, and having more sex and making more babies than you are. Sun, 10 Apr 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-04-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 8a65d66c-aa69-47e1-a74b-9357e253fc66 644 Dirty Filthy People In the event of a global nuclear war the only surviving life will be cockroaches and rats. Of course, there's no need to wait until Armageddon strikes. Rats and roaches are living in every house in America. They're sleeping right next to you, walking freely around your house, eating your food, and having more sex and making more babies than you are. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 22:37 yes This week's forecast includes heavy rains and a high chance of flooding. Expect huge mudslides and big messes to clean up. Your best chance of success this week relies on lots of blue tarps, large trash bags, gallons of cleaning fluid and rubber gloves. It's time for potty training. Wed, 30 Mar 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-03-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast e9f11694-6ccf-4695-b9fb-8fb239973387 643 Heavy Rains and Mudlsides This week's forecast includes heavy rains and a high chance of flooding. Expect huge mudslides and big messes to clean up. Your best chance of success this week relies on lots of blue tarps, large trash bags, gallons of cleaning fluid and rubber gloves. It's time for potty training. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:33 yes It takes 10 muscles to smile and 6 muscles to frown. Either way sounds like a lot of work. Why not just go with Resting Bitch Face. That takes no muscles at all and is simply the look on some people's faces. It's not only true...there is science behind it to prove it. Upload your face. Sun, 26 Mar 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-03-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 84de3688-1398-4c47-865e-b9b6cea2f5bc 642 Super R.B.F. It takes 10 muscles to smile and 6 muscles to frown. Either way sounds like a lot of work. Why not just go with Resting Bitch Face. That takes no muscles at all and is simply the look on some people's faces. It's not only true...there is science behind it to prove it. Upload your face. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 24:45 yes Once upon a time there was a little massage parlor close the edge of town, all the way at the end of an isolated strip mall. All the boys and girls who went there there had a magical experience and walked away happily ever after. The End. Wed, 23 Mar 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-03-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast eb9007e9-b260-4d8b-80df-ac351da9f403 641 Happily Ever After Once upon a time there was a little massage parlor close the edge of town, all the way at the end of an isolated strip mall. All the boys and girls who went there there had a magical experience and walked away happily ever after. The End. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:17 yes Throwing kids birthday parties should be an Olympic sport. You need some form of super talent to come up with the party of the year that every Mom will be talking about and trying to beat. This year, just rent a bunch of zoo animals and let the tigers eat any kids' mothers that can't find anything other than birthday parties to talk about when you see them. You win. Sun, 20 Mar 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-03-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 9146f522-a34c-485e-baa8-031ee7a3b1e6 640 Contemplative Throwing kids birthday parties should be an Olympic sport. You need some form of super talent to come up with the party of the year that every Mom will be talking about and trying to beat. This year, just rent a bunch of zoo animals and let the tigers eat any kids' mothers that can't find anything other than birthday parties to talk about when you see them. You win. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 18:16 yes The grass is always greener across the street, or at least at the porn house that sells for more money than the house you just sold. The extra sheen that glistened on the walls and the unusually crunchy carpeting apparently appeaed to a lot of people with good taste. Throw in the 70's style painting in the bathroom with a lady taking off her clothes and you've just pushed the selling price to one million. Wed, 9 Mar 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-03-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 44e92b6b-2017-44af-ad68-cb72e2c4f8a6 639 For Sale The grass is always greener across the street, or at least at the porn house that sells for more money than the house you just sold. The extra sheen that glistened on the walls and the unusually crunchy carpeting apparently appeaed to a lot of people with good taste. Throw in the 70's style painting in the bathroom with a lady taking off her clothes and you've just pushed the selling price to one million. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 13:18 yes Mixing is up a bit and trying new things can help keep a relationship interesting. If you're going to bring latex body paint home from the store, however, make sure you do a little trim before you put it on. Nobody really wants to see your pubes sticking out of a sexy layer of body paint. Sun, 6 Mar 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-03-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast aed03416-2829-44c7-9632-9d020e512070 638 Peel It Off Mixing is up a bit and trying new things can help keep a relationship interesting. If you're going to bring latex body paint home from the store, however, make sure you do a little trim before you put it on. Nobody really wants to see your pubes sticking out of a sexy layer of body paint. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 19:56 yes It doesn't have to be Halloween for you to be the scary dyke in the neighborhood. All you need is your big stupid dog, a pair of jeans, some old sneakers and a sweatshirt. The straight ladies will be calling their husbands off the couch to come outside to protect them. It's that easy. Wed, 17 Feb 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-02-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast c044ab75-b590-40a2-855a-bd504b933662 637 Pissing Match It doesn't have to be Halloween for you to be the scary dyke in the neighborhood. All you need is your big stupid dog, a pair of jeans, some old sneakers and a sweatshirt. The straight ladies will be calling their husbands off the couch to come outside to protect them. It's that easy. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:15 yes Haven't had any in a while and getting tired of doing it by yourself? Now all you have to do is to see the gynecologist and get a mammogram in the same week. That's enough penetration for entire month. Done. Sun, 14 Feb 2016 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2016-02-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 3a045438-2533-4f34-8c2a-d964feec0947 636 Vagick Wand Haven't had any in a while and getting tired of doing it by yourself? Now all you have to do is to see the gynecologist and get a mammogram in the same week. That's enough penetration for entire month. Done. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 16:34 yes Any mom can be a den mother for a troop of cub scouts. All it takes is a blue, button down shirt and a yellow bandana around your neck. It takes a special kind of mom to take her little scout camping out in the middle of nowhere, to sleep on the ground with bugs, to give up her Starbucks coffee for a weekend, and to learn how to play guitar so that she can sing along to "Jingle Bells" with her son at Christmas time. Wed, 16 Dec 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-12-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast a16f9e98-fe75-4308-b571-f08fca16a7bb 635 Jingle Bells Any mom can be a den mother for a troop of cub scouts. All it takes is a blue, button down shirt and a yellow bandana around your neck. It takes a special kind of mom to take her little scout camping out in the middle of nowhere, to sleep on the ground with bugs, to give up her Starbucks coffee for a weekend, and to learn how to play guitar so that she can sing along to "Jingle Bells" with her son at Christmas time. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 14:29 yes It's not that Lesbians don't like straight people, and it's not like we don't want to hang out with them. It's just hard to get it out of your head that heterosexuality might be contagious. Sat, 12 Dec 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-12-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast bdb5d068-d73f-43a4-9220-ded57ee76ecb 634 Contagious It's not that Lesbians don't like straight people, and it's not like we don't want to hang out with them. It's just hard to get it out of your head that heterosexuality might be contagious. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 18:02 yes Family-friendly used to mean that Homos were welcome. Now it means you can bring your 3-year old son and let him run around the restaurant to his heart's content and nobody will bat an eye. It also means that the drug addict prostitute taking a bird bath in the restroom is also welcome. After all, she's somebody's family, too. Wed, 2 Dec 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-12-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast f0c62dd6-3cd8-4415-95ea-a1e29ad0a88a 633 Bird Bath Family-friendly used to mean that Homos were welcome. Now it means you can bring your 3-year old son and let him run around the restaurant to his heart's content and nobody will bat an eye. It also means that the drug addict prostitute taking a bird bath in the restroom is also welcome. After all, she's somebody's family, too. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 11:31 yes It's perfectly normal to cook while naked. There are just two rules you have to remember. Never reach down to scratch your butt, and always wear an apron. You really don't want that bush to catch fire and burn down the house. That will be a lot of explaining to do. Sat, 28 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 5b70ec4d-905a-49e7-b7ba-38521f27f4f2 632 Fire in the Hole It's perfectly normal to cook while naked. There are just two rules you have to remember. Never reach down to scratch your butt, and always wear an apron. You really don't want that bush to catch fire and burn down the house. That will be a lot of explaining to do. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:13 yes The good people of Yelp are delighted to let you know that your local dog park is a feces encrusted mudhole with rancid people that will unceremoniously allow their dogs to mount your pure and innocent little princess. Sounds like a perfect place to take your dog for a fun afternoon of running around and meeting other dogs. Sun, 22 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast fa69d624-47d5-4054-88b2-9a9e75ebec4a 631 Snack Attack The good people of Yelp are delighted to let you know that your local dog park is a feces encrusted mudhole with rancid people that will unceremoniously allow their dogs to mount your pure and innocent little princess. Sounds like a perfect place to take your dog for a fun afternoon of running around and meeting other dogs. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:36 yes It's the law of the land now -- Gay people can get married anywhere in the United States, and we have all the rights that go along with it. Just don't take your honeymoon in Hawaii or you might spend the rest of your vacation in jail just for kissing your wife in public. Wed, 18 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 746fbbe3-ee7c-4cd3-966a-3fa637796113 630 Love You More It's the law of the land now -- Gay people can get married anywhere in the United States, and we have all the rights that go along with it. Just don't take your honeymoon in Hawaii or you might spend the rest of your vacation in jail just for kissing your wife in public. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:59 yes It used to be that a dick pic was something you'd see on the wall of a public restroom. Someone would artfully depict a cartoon of a penis using a black magic marker. We would either be horrified or chuckle to ourselves discreetly and then share the story about it with our friends afterwards. Now we have smartphones with digital cameras so that we can simply take a picture of our genitals and send to everyone we know. Life sure has gotten easier. Sun, 15 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 88c24c01-61ce-49bc-ba18-9b6575e37562 629 What's For Dinner It used to be that a dick pic was something you'd see on the wall of a public restroom. Someone would artfully depict a cartoon of a penis using a black magic marker. We would either be horrified or chuckle to ourselves discreetly and then share the story about it with our friends afterwards. Now we have smartphones with digital cameras so that we can simply take a picture of our genitals and send to everyone we know. Life sure has gotten easier. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 17:48 yes Rescue centers that adopt pets usually go through a lot of effort to ensure that the pets they adopt out are a good match for the new owners. They check the pet's temperament against the new home, they check to see if the pet is high or low energy, if they're good with kids and if they get along with other animals. One aspect they tend to miss, however, is to check a dog's IQ. Nobody expects their next pet to be an Einstein, but it would be nice to adopt a pet that can at least remember where the food bowl gets put down every day. Wed, 11 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 01982a77-a2c0-40ff-971a-4a8d77777ce8 628 Choose More Carfully Rescue centers that adopt pets usually go through a lot of effort to ensure that the pets they adopt out are a good match for the new owners. They check the pet's temperament against the new home, they check to see if the pet is high or low energy, if they're good with kids and if they get along with other animals. One aspect they tend to miss, however, is to check a dog's IQ. Nobody expects their next pet to be an Einstein, but it would be nice to adopt a pet that can at least remember where the food bowl gets put down every day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:09 yes We spend a lot of time inspecting a new house before buying it. People come in to look at the foundation, the plumbing, the electrical, and everything else that might go wrong. What we don't usually check is to see if some supernatural presence has already decided this is their home. Then, one day you're convinced the house is possessed when you detect an otherworldly smell so rancid that it can't possibly be human. That's when you realize the 3-year old just took an enormous, fetid crap in his pants. Sun, 8 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast ae878634-7fe4-416e-beb1-1309576a10b2 627 A Haunting We spend a lot of time inspecting a new house before buying it. People come in to look at the foundation, the plumbing, the electrical, and everything else that might go wrong. What we don't usually check is to see if some supernatural presence has already decided this is their home. Then, one day you're convinced the house is possessed when you detect an otherworldly smell so rancid that it can't possibly be human. That's when you realize the 3-year old just took an enormous, fetid crap in his pants. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 22:16 yes The "sex" talk used to be easy when it was just the birds and the bees. Now you have to cover not only the birds and the bees, but the birds and the birds, the bees and the bees, the birds that like both birds and bees (and vice versa), the birds that were born bees, the bees that were born birds, the birds and the bees that don't like labels and the birds and the bees that are still questioning. It's going to take more than a day to cover all that. Wed, 4 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 05610403-335d-42d9-a8c4-a9ab961d1d3a 626 Vagical Mystery Tour The "sex" talk used to be easy when it was just the birds and the bees. Now you have to cover not only the birds and the bees, but the birds and the birds, the bees and the bees, the birds that like both birds and bees (and vice versa), the birds that were born bees, the bees that were born birds, the birds and the bees that don't like labels and the birds and the bees that are still questioning. It's going to take more than a day to cover all that. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 19:42 yes It doesn't take much to set some people off. One Facebook message is all it can take to get someone going on a rant. Listen to Roxanne deconstruct the passage of Gay Marriage back in June. Sun, 1 Nov 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-11-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast b827fe6b-7d97-469c-911b-16832bda4ee5 625 Ignorance Can Be Cured It doesn't take much to set some people off. One Facebook message is all it can take to get someone going on a rant. Listen to Roxanne deconstruct the passage of Gay Marriage back in June. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 24:06 yes Some of us enjoy holding on to the memory of our first real crushes. We can remember vividly those warm wonderful feelings and delightful fantasies. When we think about those wonderful memories, we don't think about our old crushes the way they are today. We always remember them the way they were back then...back when their breasts were still in the right place. Wed, 28 Oct 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-10-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast a450f1c4-f3be-42c2-af90-d58487343329 624 Feeling Creepy Some of us enjoy holding on to the memory of our first real crushes. We can remember vividly those warm wonderful feelings and delightful fantasies. When we think about those wonderful memories, we don't think about our old crushes the way they are today. We always remember them the way they were back then...back when their breasts were still in the right place. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 11:57 yes Sometimes you can go months or even years without thinking about someone, and then one day out of the blue it hits you...are they dead or alive? Sometimes maybe you're just better off not knowing. The mystery of not knowing is more exciting than the truth. Sat, 24 Oct 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-10-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast a1aed7af-09a2-43b4-b4f0-1423b623d02f 623 Dead or Alive Sometimes you can go months or even years without thinking about someone, and then one day out of the blue it hits you...are they dead or alive? Sometimes maybe you're just better off not knowing. The mystery of not knowing is more exciting than the truth. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 14:35 yes The myth of Santa Claus is designed around instilling fear in your child to make them behave. If you're not a good boy or girl, you won't get any presents for Christmas. Once your kid is too old to believe in Santa, it's time to move on to the next helpful lie. If you're having sex and you're not wearing a condom, your mom is going to know about it. That works until your kid has to tell you that you're going to be a grandmother. Wed, 11 Feb 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-02-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast ca483b8a-ffb1-4178-a0b3-4d7f8ed5986c 622 Park Bench The myth of Santa Claus is designed around instilling fear in your child to make them behave. If you're not a good boy or girl, you won't get any presents for Christmas. Once your kid is too old to believe in Santa, it's time to move on to the next helpful lie. If you're having sex and you're not wearing a condom, your mom is going to know about it. That works until your kid has to tell you that you're going to be a grandmother. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 13:28 yes When it costs $500 to have your dog neutered it's no wonder the local shelters are overflowing with unwanted dogs and cats. It's also a good reason to simply go the DIY route. Get a pair of poultry sheers from the kitchen and some electrical tape from the garage. The job should be done in one good snip. A whiskey chaser for the dog and you can call it a day. Sun, 8 Feb 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-02-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast ac83e7e9-a90f-4978-8c4f-f78250d939bc 621 Poultry Sheers When it costs $500 to have your dog neutered it's no wonder the local shelters are overflowing with unwanted dogs and cats. It's also a good reason to simply go the DIY route. Get a pair of poultry sheers from the kitchen and some electrical tape from the garage. The job should be done in one good snip. A whiskey chaser for the dog and you can call it a day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 19:11 yes Here's an idea. Why not have a "dollar menu" at the vet? Instead of the vet telling you what the treatment for you sick dog or cat is going to be, you simply choose what you want to have done from the dollar menu. You can have the five thousand dollar surgery for your dog's eye, or you can buy an eye patch from the 99 cents store. Your choice. Wed, 28 Jan 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-01-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 8e5a6092-3e89-4ed2-9f87-384f54158807 620 Tail Pattern Baldness Here's an idea. Why not have a "dollar menu" at the vet? Instead of the vet telling you what the treatment for you sick dog or cat is going to be, you simply choose what you want to have done from the dollar menu. You can have the five thousand dollar surgery for your dog's eye, or you can buy an eye patch from the 99 cents store. Your choice. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:17 yes Who doesn't want a cuddly lovable pet to love and enjoy? Here's an idea...why not a full grown alligator? There's a pet you can let roam freely through your backyard and your house, a pet you can have curl up to you at night when you sleep, and a pet that's really good with children. Feeding it isn't really a problem either. Just let it eat all the cats and small dogs in the neighborhood. Sun, 25 Jan 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-01-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 664b1855-cf86-4dd8-809a-5f4b5893e34e 619 Wild Animal Who doesn't want a cuddly lovable pet to love and enjoy? Here's an idea...why not a full grown alligator? There's a pet you can let roam freely through your backyard and your house, a pet you can have curl up to you at night when you sleep, and a pet that's really good with children. Feeding it isn't really a problem either. Just let it eat all the cats and small dogs in the neighborhood. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:22 yes Nothing says you're a real woman like a tampon stuck in the back pocket of your jeans. Real Lesbians don't have wallets in their back pocket, they've got a heavy-duty super-flow day tampon ready for action and for all the world to see. When the tampon is out of the pocket, you can still see the outline of the tampon rubbed into the denim on the outside. Not for wimps. Wed, 21 Jan 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-01-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 08e15a6f-07c3-49d2-8142-ace9e5e67830 618 Legacy Nothing says you're a real woman like a tampon stuck in the back pocket of your jeans. Real Lesbians don't have wallets in their back pocket, they've got a heavy-duty super-flow day tampon ready for action and for all the world to see. When the tampon is out of the pocket, you can still see the outline of the tampon rubbed into the denim on the outside. Not for wimps. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:06 yes The one sure-fire thing that makes Lesbians get moist in their jeans is a Lesbian in a baseball hat on crutches. To make it a double orgasm, the reason she's on crutches is from a softball injury. Then there's the perfect trifecta - a Lesbian law enforcement officer on a K-9 patrol with a dog in her car. Call the Coast Guard, because we have someone in a danger of downing in rush of body fluid. Sun, 18 Jan 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-01-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast e6bfe310-e6f2-40d5-a88c-03d9f66c4b36 617 Jiffy Luber The one sure-fire thing that makes Lesbians get moist in their jeans is a Lesbian in a baseball hat on crutches. To make it a double orgasm, the reason she's on crutches is from a softball injury. Then there's the perfect trifecta - a Lesbian law enforcement officer on a K-9 patrol with a dog in her car. Call the Coast Guard, because we have someone in a danger of downing in rush of body fluid. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 18:39 yes The service seemed great. You got seated faster than expected. The waitress came right to your table to take your order. Your food came up super fast and everything tasted great. The waitress must have been super busy since she was only by the table once to deliver the food. The check comes right away. It might have been some other table's check, but at least it came quickly. You just thought the service was good that night, but it turns out it was all really because you were Dyke Beautiful. Wed, 14 Jan 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-01-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast d7fe9d3d-ab99-46f6-98e6-a91722688d51 616 Dyke Beautiful The service seemed great. You got seated faster than expected. The waitress came right to your table to take your order. Your food came up super fast and everything tasted great. The waitress must have been super busy since she was only by the table once to deliver the food. The check comes right away. It might have been some other table's check, but at least it came quickly. You just thought the service was good that night, but it turns out it was all really because you were Dyke Beautiful. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 26:51 yes After you've tried several different tactics to get people to stop leaving dog crap on your front lawn, it's time to move to Def Con 5. Put in a surveillance camera, record the people leaving crap on the lawn and then edit together a loop tape of the culprits. Play the recording on a big screen TV out your front window and play the tape over and over again until the assailants have to move away from the neighborhood in shame. Sun, 11 Jan 2015 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2015-01-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 30af09f3-7201-42fb-92ce-8335790696ca 615 Snow Globe After you've tried several different tactics to get people to stop leaving dog crap on your front lawn, it's time to move to Def Con 5. Put in a surveillance camera, record the people leaving crap on the lawn and then edit together a loop tape of the culprits. Play the recording on a big screen TV out your front window and play the tape over and over again until the assailants have to move away from the neighborhood in shame. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 19:25 yes If you're going to open a business, it's helpful to have the name of your company clearly spell out to customers exactly what you're selling. After all these years it finally became clear that the spot between the twat and the shitter is called the Twitter. Some people are just the last to know. Sun, 28 Dec 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-12-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 224788af-4615-4cd0-94bd-55ff537b37c4 614 Business Plan If you're going to open a business, it's helpful to have the name of your company clearly spell out to customers exactly what you're selling. After all these years it finally became clear that the spot between the twat and the shitter is called the Twitter. Some people are just the last to know. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:22 yes For the general movie-going public there's Rotten Tomatoes to help guide you through the myriad bad movies that you can waste good money on going to see. Lesbians need the same type of movie guide so that they don't waste money seeing the movie about the young Lesbian whose girlfriend starts sleeping with her mother. We'll call it Rotten Vaginas. If that doesn't keep you away...nothing will. Wed, 24 Dec 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-12-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast e77651cc-2ba9-4569-8e1f-1b881e3c9a64 613 Pornish For the general movie-going public there's Rotten Tomatoes to help guide you through the myriad bad movies that you can waste good money on going to see. Lesbians need the same type of movie guide so that they don't waste money seeing the movie about the young Lesbian whose girlfriend starts sleeping with her mother. We'll call it Rotten Vaginas. If that doesn't keep you away...nothing will. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:42 yes It's really not hard to be a criminal and get away with it. All it really takes is not being stupid. Just learn to spell the word thousand and you could get away with stealing cash all day long. Here's a hint- there is no W in the word thousand. Sun, 21 Dec 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-12-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast c904a934-7c6b-4a5f-a648-ffe8938ddf57 612 Thowsand It's really not hard to be a criminal and get away with it. All it really takes is not being stupid. Just learn to spell the word thousand and you could get away with stealing cash all day long. Here's a hint- there is no W in the word thousand. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 14:32 yes Buying a tray of store bought cookies to bring to the holiday party for $30 seemed like an act of extortion that should have brought the grocery store ten years in prison. That was until the Gay men showed up with their $800 baby stroller. At that point bringing the tiny little tray of stale cookies wrapped in cellophane and a chintzy bow made you seem like nothing but a cheap and classless Lesbian. Wed, 17 Dec 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-12-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast ceb14fbd-3ec0-450c-924d-ff08194431a4 611 Overbooked Buying a tray of store bought cookies to bring to the holiday party for $30 seemed like an act of extortion that should have brought the grocery store ten years in prison. That was until the Gay men showed up with their $800 baby stroller. At that point bringing the tiny little tray of stale cookies wrapped in cellophane and a chintzy bow made you seem like nothing but a cheap and classless Lesbian. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 21:30 yes When you are rude to your barista they simply get you back by giving you decaf instead of full test in your latte. Your favorite dry cleaner also has a trick when you bring in a bag of laundry that you've just informed them your dog has pissed on. Theyre happy to take that dripping, wet bag from you, but when you get it back and you put those clothes on, you'll realize the dry cleaner pissed on your clothes before they gave them back. Sun, 14 Dec 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-12-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 309c8fbb-ddff-4e0e-8891-3ed5dc38597f 610 Nervous Laughter When you are rude to your barista they simply get you back by giving you decaf instead of full test in your latte. Your favorite dry cleaner also has a trick when you bring in a bag of laundry that you've just informed them your dog has pissed on. Theyre happy to take that dripping, wet bag from you, but when you get it back and you put those clothes on, you'll realize the dry cleaner pissed on your clothes before they gave them back. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 17:05 yes If a $3.50 delivery charge is too much for you to spend to have pizza delivered, then you need to get your fat, lazy behind off the couch and go pick it up yourself. Of course, if the delivery person is a hot Lesbian rolling up to your door with a smokin' hot package just for you...then maybe $20 doesn't sound like too much. Sounds like it will be take-out for dinner every night. Wed, 10 Dec 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-12-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 1d26bb72-c11d-44da-bf75-07a4e6f4a7d4 609 Free Delivery If a $3.50 delivery charge is too much for you to spend to have pizza delivered, then you need to get your fat, lazy behind off the couch and go pick it up yourself. Of course, if the delivery person is a hot Lesbian rolling up to your door with a smokin' hot package just for you...then maybe $20 doesn't sound like too much. Sounds like it will be take-out for dinner every night. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 11:32 yes If your dog's face swells up to the point where it looks like Mike Tyson beat him up, it's time to go to the vet right away. If you're just out walking your dog and you pass that vet's office, move over to the other side of the street immediately. Otherwise, money will start getting sucked out of your ATM card and credit cards automatically. Sun, 7 Dec 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-12-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast e447da14-ca73-4574-9e07-6e876eed7e72 608 Besties If your dog's face swells up to the point where it looks like Mike Tyson beat him up, it's time to go to the vet right away. If you're just out walking your dog and you pass that vet's office, move over to the other side of the street immediately. Otherwise, money will start getting sucked out of your ATM card and credit cards automatically. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 22:25 yes Thanksgiving...the time of year to be thankful for family, good friends, all the wonderful things in our lives and for sharing with others. Next time you share that secret family recipe that's been handed down from generation to generation make sure that you leave out one ingredient so that you drive the next three generations insane trying to figure out how you make that special pie taste so good. Sun, 30 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast e9745895-ad24-4d09-923e-1a2f164cfdc2 607 Thankful Thanksgiving...the time of year to be thankful for family, good friends, all the wonderful things in our lives and for sharing with others. Next time you share that secret family recipe that's been handed down from generation to generation make sure that you leave out one ingredient so that you drive the next three generations insane trying to figure out how you make that special pie taste so good. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:05 yes It's happened to all of us at one time or another. We dream about something that we're convinced is absolutely real. Like the time Angelina Jolie, Mila Kunis and Shakira all showed up at your front door ready to rock your world. According to the dictionary, someone that is delusional is someone that believes things that couldn't possibly be true. Also defined as a psychological disorder. Wed, 26 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast b2470601-d9c2-4685-adb0-17a0f6351f6f 606 Delusional It's happened to all of us at one time or another. We dream about something that we're convinced is absolutely real. Like the time Angelina Jolie, Mila Kunis and Shakira all showed up at your front door ready to rock your world. According to the dictionary, someone that is delusional is someone that believes things that couldn't possibly be true. Also defined as a psychological disorder. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:46 yes There's one way to guarantee that you, your partner and your baby can all sit in the same row of the airplane. Fill a ziploc bag full of baby crap and hide it discreetly in the diaper bag. If the airline tries to move you, simply pull out the bag of crap, insert it into your baby's diapers and then proceed to change the baby right there in your seat. Call your partner over to help so that everyone knows you're together. Guaranteed to work every time...straight or Gay. Sun, 23 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 930025e6-10a3-4330-b8d7-2b3e777db170 605 Secret Weapon There's one way to guarantee that you, your partner and your baby can all sit in the same row of the airplane. Fill a ziploc bag full of baby crap and hide it discreetly in the diaper bag. If the airline tries to move you, simply pull out the bag of crap, insert it into your baby's diapers and then proceed to change the baby right there in your seat. Call your partner over to help so that everyone knows you're together. Guaranteed to work every time...straight or Gay. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 13:27 yes The meaning of a true partnership is when a your spouse is willing to get up in the middle of the night, walk down the street in her pajamas and look like some freak on her cell phone in the middle of the street to hack a portal for a video game you're playing. The even truer meaning of the word partnership is that she puts up with you playing that nerdy game with teenage boys across the city that are up late at night jizzing on their cellphones. Wed, 19 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 2181bd30-4804-46f4-824f-cb854ccbbb35 604 Under Attack The meaning of a true partnership is when a your spouse is willing to get up in the middle of the night, walk down the street in her pajamas and look like some freak on her cell phone in the middle of the street to hack a portal for a video game you're playing. The even truer meaning of the word partnership is that she puts up with you playing that nerdy game with teenage boys across the city that are up late at night jizzing on their cellphones. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 16:13 yes There's no reason to be ashamed or embarrassed if your children photo bomb other families on vacation taking their own family photos. They're just trying to do a public service by trying to make the other family look better. It's a public service that's free of charge. Sun, 16 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast f611a0b0-e341-46f1-b499-af8e166cb8f2 603 Photo Bomb There's no reason to be ashamed or embarrassed if your children photo bomb other families on vacation taking their own family photos. They're just trying to do a public service by trying to make the other family look better. It's a public service that's free of charge. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 14:53 yes Pets are good for a lot of reasons. They can help lower your stress level, they can make you forget about your horrible day and they generally make you feel happier. They're also good to blame the smell on when you lay a big stinky fart in front of your friends. You can blame it on the dog...but your friends know it was you anyway. Even when it really is the dog...your friends still think it's you. Wed, 12 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast c4e6aac7-7227-469d-866a-d60dedde327c 602 Last Saturday Night Pets are good for a lot of reasons. They can help lower your stress level, they can make you forget about your horrible day and they generally make you feel happier. They're also good to blame the smell on when you lay a big stinky fart in front of your friends. You can blame it on the dog...but your friends know it was you anyway. Even when it really is the dog...your friends still think it's you. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:45 yes The unspoken rule of Lesbian Etiquette - if you see another Lesbian that you don't know, don't talk to her. Don't make eye contact. Don't acknowledge her existence. Don't stand too close to her. And, definitely don't be seen together in the same location for more than a minute. It's a good thing online dating is now an option or Lesbians would be single forever. Sun, 9 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 7b5a1102-6ebb-4251-9a37-ec4c87bbed54 601 Frosted Blonde Tips The unspoken rule of Lesbian Etiquette - if you see another Lesbian that you don't know, don't talk to her. Don't make eye contact. Don't acknowledge her existence. Don't stand too close to her. And, definitely don't be seen together in the same location for more than a minute. It's a good thing online dating is now an option or Lesbians would be single forever. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 12:06 yes It's the perfect family pet. He's a Lab mix, housebroken, good with kids, good with other animals and loves cats. He doesn't grab food from the table and he never jumps on people. Well...until you complete the adoption process to take the new puppy home. Then he's a Pit Bull mix illegally imported from another country, full of worms, not potty-trained and doesn't know how to walk on a leash. Wed, 5 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 5918a068-6936-4258-abb2-6dfcbe302a8f 600 Dominic It's the perfect family pet. He's a Lab mix, housebroken, good with kids, good with other animals and loves cats. He doesn't grab food from the table and he never jumps on people. Well...until you complete the adoption process to take the new puppy home. Then he's a Pit Bull mix illegally imported from another country, full of worms, not potty-trained and doesn't know how to walk on a leash. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 22:17 yes If you're 30 years old and you still feel the need to go trick-or-treating with a bag of your own, then don't have the audacity to lecture people about what type of candy they should buy. Take $2 out of your own pocket and go down to the store and pick up whatever candy bar you want. Or, just take a little child with you and take the candy out of their bag just like the rest of the adults in the neighborhood. Sun, 2 Nov 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-11-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 09ea01ea-a4da-4583-92f6-f1243fd8507c 599 Egged If you're 30 years old and you still feel the need to go trick-or-treating with a bag of your own, then don't have the audacity to lecture people about what type of candy they should buy. Take $2 out of your own pocket and go down to the store and pick up whatever candy bar you want. Or, just take a little child with you and take the candy out of their bag just like the rest of the adults in the neighborhood. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 18:09 yes It's never as good as the first time, especially if you're a cutter. We're not talking about just any kind of cutter. We're talking about the kind of cutting where you lose 6-10 inches that you'll never get back. To these folks, cutting a slit in your arm is simply child's play. Wed, 29 Oct 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-10-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 9eb25aef-ce6b-414b-b8dc-4d2a2928268d 598 Gelding It's never as good as the first time, especially if you're a cutter. We're not talking about just any kind of cutter. We're talking about the kind of cutting where you lose 6-10 inches that you'll never get back. To these folks, cutting a slit in your arm is simply child's play. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 14:04 yes Go ahead and download all the free movies you want from the Internet. It won't cost you a thing. Nobody is counting the 17 new viruses, the 25 cases of malware and all your passwords that have been sold in 10 different countries in the last 5 minutes. Don't worry about the fact that your computer is now dirtier than a slutty girl's vagina. Sun, 26 Oct 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-10-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast a7a9e953-7fcc-4cd9-ba78-55af6898c54c 597 Movie Time Go ahead and download all the free movies you want from the Internet. It won't cost you a thing. Nobody is counting the 17 new viruses, the 25 cases of malware and all your passwords that have been sold in 10 different countries in the last 5 minutes. Don't worry about the fact that your computer is now dirtier than a slutty girl's vagina. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 14:06 yes A lesson in simple logic. Spongebob is absorbent. Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom. Therefore, Spongebob is a tampon. More logic lessons. Don't ever sign up for Survivor or any reality show where they don't provide female sanitary supplies...unless you enjoy free-bleeding. Wed, 22 Oct 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-10-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast b5ae65a4-601b-4051-b97a-957744ad090b 596 Bloody Survival A lesson in simple logic. Spongebob is absorbent. Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom. Therefore, Spongebob is a tampon. More logic lessons. Don't ever sign up for Survivor or any reality show where they don't provide female sanitary supplies...unless you enjoy free-bleeding. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 13:31 yes Not just anyone can cut Lesbian hair and not anyone can style Lesbian hair. We might be able to shave an armpit, trim a bush or shave a leg, but getting up every morning to put every single hair in it's proper place before going out the door is not a gene everyone is born with. For the rest of us we need a Lesbian Hair Salon that does everything from the long- haired femme to the number one buzz cut, and everything in between. A a bonus they'll pluck a stray hair off your face without missing a beat. Sun, 19 Oct 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-10-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 338c216d-be2c-4b39-ac35-1b1a260d23d5 595 Straight Hair Not just anyone can cut Lesbian hair and not anyone can style Lesbian hair. We might be able to shave an armpit, trim a bush or shave a leg, but getting up every morning to put every single hair in it's proper place before going out the door is not a gene everyone is born with. For the rest of us we need a Lesbian Hair Salon that does everything from the long- haired femme to the number one buzz cut, and everything in between. A a bonus they'll pluck a stray hair off your face without missing a beat. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 10:04 yes You go to a party later in the evening...you're not planning to stay the night, but it's possible that you might be too tired to drive home. Now comes the quandary... Before you go out you get to choose one extra thing to bring with you without being consdidered psycho. Do you take the fresh pair of panties or do you take a toothbrush? Choose wisely. Sun, 12 Oct 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-10-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast c6620236-ad67-4d22-b33b-b4925c7000bd 594 Projecting You go to a party later in the evening...you're not planning to stay the night, but it's possible that you might be too tired to drive home. Now comes the quandary... Before you go out you get to choose one extra thing to bring with you without being consdidered psycho. Do you take the fresh pair of panties or do you take a toothbrush? Choose wisely. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:58 yes As a parent you have zero tolerance for any teacher preying on children in the classroom. The very thought of it makes people's blood boil. That's as it should be. But, when you're younger and in the classroom of the hot teacher that you dream about every day...you think it might not be such a bad thing to have the teacher show up to teach class naked one day. Just one day. Sun, 31 Aug 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-08-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, gay parenting, gay parents, lesbian parents, lesbian podcast 0ae389ac-b9d0-46ab-b4fa-6face7a40853 593 Circus Animals As a parent you have zero tolerance for any teacher preying on children in the classroom. The very thought of it makes people's blood boil. That's as it should be. But, when you're younger and in the classroom of the hot teacher that you dream about every day...you think it might not be such a bad thing to have the teacher show up to teach class naked one day. Just one day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay parents, gay parenting, lesbian parents, gay podcast 15:37 yes You don't have to be a Buddhist to respect other creatures and to want to coexist peacefully with all living things. But, when a bug the size of a piece of luggage comes into your house and decides to make your bathtub its new home, it's game on. Let's just hope the bug doesn't know any type of martial arts. Sun, 17 Aug 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-08-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f7576836-c769-4498-a041-b38669376664 592 Buggin' Out You don't have to be a Buddhist to respect other creatures and to want to coexist peacefully with all living things. But, when a bug the size of a piece of luggage comes into your house and decides to make your bathtub its new home, it's game on. Let's just hope the bug doesn't know any type of martial arts. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:40 yes You have a few drinks one night and you decide to pleasure yourself before you go to bed. In the morning you can't find your vibrator. There's either a mouse in your closet that is having the time of their life....or you had better go looking for that thing immediately. Immediately as in right now...not 10 years from now. Wed, 13 Aug 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-08-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f00cc7c3-7a0e-40f4-9364-76c0463615b1 591 Battery Acid You have a few drinks one night and you decide to pleasure yourself before you go to bed. In the morning you can't find your vibrator. There's either a mouse in your closet that is having the time of their life....or you had better go looking for that thing immediately. Immediately as in right now...not 10 years from now. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:08 yes Let's face it. At some time in our lives we all experience getting dumped. It's ten times worse when we're seriously in love with the other person and one hundred times worse when they dump us for a close friend. There are lot of ways to get over the pain of a breakup. Photoshopping a herpes sore on your exes photo may be quite satisfying, but we've got even more ways to help you through the process. Sun, 10 Aug 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-08-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4755c9b4-b63e-41e3-93be-a561d442ebd5 590 Mixed Results Let's face it. At some time in our lives we all experience getting dumped. It's ten times worse when we're seriously in love with the other person and one hundred times worse when they dump us for a close friend. There are lot of ways to get over the pain of a breakup. Photoshopping a herpes sore on your exes photo may be quite satisfying, but we've got even more ways to help you through the process. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 21:31 yes When you have a toddler in the house and unexpected things happen, it's time to think very carefully about the sequence of events that may have transpired. It's no longer safe to just ignore odd coincidences. Before kids maybe your toothbrush was wet because your wife used it. Once you have a toddler in the house, if the toothbrush is wet and you haven't brushed your teeth...you can be sure that thing was in the toilet. Thu, 7 Aug 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-08-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c33687f4-c13a-45de-9b8b-057e191d0288 589 Strong Immune System When you have a toddler in the house and unexpected things happen, it's time to think very carefully about the sequence of events that may have transpired. It's no longer safe to just ignore odd coincidences. Before kids maybe your toothbrush was wet because your wife used it. Once you have a toddler in the house, if the toothbrush is wet and you haven't brushed your teeth...you can be sure that thing was in the toilet. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:57 yes Colonel Mustard with a candlestick in the dining room. Nope. It was the cleaning lady with a Swiffer in the hallway closet. Either way...the wedding rings are gone and the cleaning lady is now on a luxurious first-class vacation traveling throughout Europe in her new Lamborghini. Mon, 4 Aug 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-08-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast be6d3ee3-e51f-475a-99f3-2bf5ff6c6b4c 588 Ring Toss Colonel Mustard with a candlestick in the dining room. Nope. It was the cleaning lady with a Swiffer in the hallway closet. Either way...the wedding rings are gone and the cleaning lady is now on a luxurious first-class vacation traveling throughout Europe in her new Lamborghini. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:29 yes It's widely accepted that Gay conversion therapy simply doesn't work. However, that was before someone came up with the brilliant idea of finding the most hideous and despicable man possible and then telling the Gay man you're trying to convert to being a heterosexual to go down on him. Without fail the conversion therapy will work. Gay men would rather lick a vag than go down on that. Cured. Mon, 28 Jul 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-07-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ee0d517d-479e-4010-ac26-d82ec94061b7 587 Conversion It's widely accepted that Gay conversion therapy simply doesn't work. However, that was before someone came up with the brilliant idea of finding the most hideous and despicable man possible and then telling the Gay man you're trying to convert to being a heterosexual to go down on him. Without fail the conversion therapy will work. Gay men would rather lick a vag than go down on that. Cured. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:42 yes The only thing worse than having to go the doctor to explain that you've left a tampon up inside yourself for the last three days is when the doctor explains to you that it's more common than you think. As a public service to women everywhere, Lesbians of the world need to unite to help inspect vaginas everywhere just in case someone inadvertently left something up there. We're professionals...we can help. Fri, 25 Jul 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-07-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 628eda8a-5d76-4743-8233-ee21a5137fe3 586 Three Days Later The only thing worse than having to go the doctor to explain that you've left a tampon up inside yourself for the last three days is when the doctor explains to you that it's more common than you think. As a public service to women everywhere, Lesbians of the world need to unite to help inspect vaginas everywhere just in case someone inadvertently left something up there. We're professionals...we can help. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:12 yes There's are reason some children are fearful of clowns. They go to parties with clowns that should have retired 20 years earlier. Back in the day they might have enjoyed clowning, but now they hate little children, they're sick of making balloon animals and the clown suit smells like sweat and vomit because it hasn't been cleaned in those last 20 years either. Thu, 22 May 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-05-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 21cb5a29-c872-4f48-8b78-cb5ecc25d2b5 585 Fuckles the Clown There's are reason some children are fearful of clowns. They go to parties with clowns that should have retired 20 years earlier. Back in the day they might have enjoyed clowning, but now they hate little children, they're sick of making balloon animals and the clown suit smells like sweat and vomit because it hasn't been cleaned in those last 20 years either. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:55 yes When a job needs to be done and something in the house needs to be fixed it's time to call a professional. You can't just call anyone. You want to make sure they have years of experience and have earned a badge of respect in their trade. If a plumber shows up at your house and they don't show you some plumber's crack within the first 30 seconds of starting job, it's time to ask them to leave. Clearly, they have not earned their professional license. Sun, 18 May 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-05-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a5299a79-bbce-4473-8113-93743b4cbe23 584 Plumber Crack When a job needs to be done and something in the house needs to be fixed it's time to call a professional. You can't just call anyone. You want to make sure they have years of experience and have earned a badge of respect in their trade. If a plumber shows up at your house and they don't show you some plumber's crack within the first 30 seconds of starting job, it's time to ask them to leave. Clearly, they have not earned their professional license. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:57 yes If you're planning to go on a hunger strike you might want to make sure that somebody really cares enough about what you're protesting to give a crap about whether you die doing it or not. You don't want a bunch of people showing up with steaming buckets of Chick-Fil-A to see whether you'll get through the next 40 days withough dying of starvation. Place your bets. Wed, 7 May 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-05-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 159abecc-fe16-4a94-b3a1-988cde37f5f2 583 Hunger Strike If you're planning to go on a hunger strike you might want to make sure that somebody really cares enough about what you're protesting to give a crap about whether you die doing it or not. You don't want a bunch of people showing up with steaming buckets of Chick-Fil-A to see whether you'll get through the next 40 days withough dying of starvation. Place your bets. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:42 yes Every food group has its own version of some sick, disgusting food equivalent. Beef has pink slime and meat glue, chicken has McNuggets and dairy has Cheez Whiz. It's not really something to worry about. Just do as mom did and cut off the bad parts with that are all green, moldy and inedible...and serve it anyway. Nobody will figure it out, because the insepector is screwing the plant manager. Sun, 4 May 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-05-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 463b97e5-ab58-47cc-a1a7-a7f99aad87bd 582 Eat Chicken Every food group has its own version of some sick, disgusting food equivalent. Beef has pink slime and meat glue, chicken has McNuggets and dairy has Cheez Whiz. It's not really something to worry about. Just do as mom did and cut off the bad parts with that are all green, moldy and inedible...and serve it anyway. Nobody will figure it out, because the insepector is screwing the plant manager. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:41 yes The true test of parenthood is when you fall down in the playground, twist your ankle around to the back of your head, hit the ground in the worst pain you've ever felt shooting up your leg....and you still don't let out a swear word in front of all the children. The good news is that instead of boiling eggs to color for Easter, you can just put your swollen foot full of special colors inside an Easter basket and call it good. Wed, 30 Apr 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-04-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian moms, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 31af9cef-7236-456d-b979-73a56a6ecd2c 581 Easter Egg The true test of parenthood is when you fall down in the playground, twist your ankle around to the back of your head, hit the ground in the worst pain you've ever felt shooting up your leg....and you still don't let out a swear word in front of all the children. The good news is that instead of boiling eggs to color for Easter, you can just put your swollen foot full of special colors inside an Easter basket and call it good. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:12 yes Why waste weeks of your life starving in the jungle on Survivor? Now you can test your mettle by getting dropped off in a rental car in a new city without a working GPS. Or, maybe you get a GPS, but it either overheats, the charger tip breaks off, it shows a picture of you in the middle of the bay while it tells you over and over again to get back on the bridge, or maybe it just goes blank for no reason in the middle of nowhere. Mon, 28 Apr 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-04-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 91b15999-8bab-4b57-b842-b9605f9d59d3 580 GPS Wars Why waste weeks of your life starving in the jungle on Survivor? Now you can test your mettle by getting dropped off in a rental car in a new city without a working GPS. Or, maybe you get a GPS, but it either overheats, the charger tip breaks off, it shows a picture of you in the middle of the bay while it tells you over and over again to get back on the bridge, or maybe it just goes blank for no reason in the middle of nowhere. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 18:54 yes What do you get for two Gay Men that have everything and now have a brand new baby boy? You hop onto Ebay and you get screwed by a buyer advertising two baby boy style teethers, but only sends one...with polka dots. And, you get super screwed by a meth head selling a car seat tightener advertised as brand new, but looks like a child vomited food all over it and then shoved it up the dog's butt. Klassy. Mon, 14 Apr 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-04-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9ad3bffb-57a8-401d-80cd-fd17ff4c5e91 579 Full On Asshat What do you get for two Gay Men that have everything and now have a brand new baby boy? You hop onto Ebay and you get screwed by a buyer advertising two baby boy style teethers, but only sends one...with polka dots. And, you get super screwed by a meth head selling a car seat tightener advertised as brand new, but looks like a child vomited food all over it and then shoved it up the dog's butt. Klassy. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:33 yes Next time you go for take-out, make sure you check the bag for a red star. The red star doesn't mean you're the most special customer of the day. It means that someone at the restaurant thinks you're a flaming bitch. The red star means that every employee in the restaurant should jizz in your bag, empty out used plates into your food and drop a pubic hair in the bag as they pass by. Wed, 9 Apr 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-04-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 68d7c147-634c-4d09-b740-4c1868b7d20c 578 Red Star Next time you go for take-out, make sure you check the bag for a red star. The red star doesn't mean you're the most special customer of the day. It means that someone at the restaurant thinks you're a flaming bitch. The red star means that every employee in the restaurant should jizz in your bag, empty out used plates into your food and drop a pubic hair in the bag as they pass by. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 18:09 yes Two words sum up the difference between Lesbians and straight women - gift basket. The straight woman's gift basket consists of bath beads, kitchen implements and a sexy apron to wear with nothing else on when your husband gets home. The Lesbian's gift basket has a case of Beers From Around the World and a set of BBQ utensils. Sun, 6 Apr 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-04-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b6d882af-0628-456b-99ec-992c53bc347d 577 Gift Basket Two words sum up the difference between Lesbians and straight women - gift basket. The straight woman's gift basket consists of bath beads, kitchen implements and a sexy apron to wear with nothing else on when your husband gets home. The Lesbian's gift basket has a case of Beers From Around the World and a set of BBQ utensils. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 19:58 yes If you're in law enforcement and you're trying to solve a major crime, here's a tip. If the killer uses duct tape, it either a straight woman or a man. Real Lesbians only use zip ties. Don't feel bad...I didn't know that either. Sun, 30 Mar 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-03-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b09cc623-9dd4-48ac-918c-d43d1539b951 576 Zip Ties If you're in law enforcement and you're trying to solve a major crime, here's a tip. If the killer uses duct tape, it either a straight woman or a man. Real Lesbians only use zip ties. Don't feel bad...I didn't know that either. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:06 yes Out of ideas for a great new side dish for your next Super Bowl party? Here's a secret - follow around an 18 month old child, watch the foods they put together and write down all those special recipes. Who can resist blueberry yogurt and black olives. The best part is that there is absolutely no chance of anyone showing up at the same party with your super secret signature dish. Delish. Mon, 24 Mar 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-03-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a68145e7-155e-4285-b326-080b00b24403 575 Pear Shaped Head Out of ideas for a great new side dish for your next Super Bowl party? Here's a secret - follow around an 18 month old child, watch the foods they put together and write down all those special recipes. Who can resist blueberry yogurt and black olives. The best part is that there is absolutely no chance of anyone showing up at the same party with your super secret signature dish. Delish. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:35 yes It's hard to believe that calling someone a douche is a bad thing. If you're a douche you get handled gently by a nice woman, you get inserted snugly inside a warm vagina, and you become all slippery and wet. What's not to like? Oooh...forgot about the part that the reason you're being used is because that vagina smells like the tuna fish you left out for the stray cat last week. Mon, 17 Mar 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-03-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 161a2e00-2064-43d0-bad8-f8f7e6583816 574 Douche It's hard to believe that calling someone a douche is a bad thing. If you're a douche you get handled gently by a nice woman, you get inserted snugly inside a warm vagina, and you become all slippery and wet. What's not to like? Oooh...forgot about the part that the reason you're being used is because that vagina smells like the tuna fish you left out for the stray cat last week. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:04 yes The Internet has afforded humanity so many wonderful conveniences. We can find a restaurant in cities we've never been to before, we can find a date (or an f-buddy) right around the corner or pay all our bills online automatically without ever buying a stamp. It's all good until nobody knows you've been dead for the last six years because all your bills are setup on auto-pay. Thu, 13 Mar 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-03-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 57ff2926-ca66-4fca-bcf1-ceb06479dc41 573 Auto Pay The Internet has afforded humanity so many wonderful conveniences. We can find a restaurant in cities we've never been to before, we can find a date (or an f-buddy) right around the corner or pay all our bills online automatically without ever buying a stamp. It's all good until nobody knows you've been dead for the last six years because all your bills are setup on auto-pay. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:53 yes When the DMV says online that the wait is only twenty minutes, what they mean is that it will take twenty minutes for you to reach the front door so that you can take a number and wait in a line that will take another three hours. Good thing they don't charge for parking. Mon, 10 Mar 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-03-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8f4ca20a-4e6a-4996-b3e2-b559dabef77b 572 Sexy Lady When the DMV says online that the wait is only twenty minutes, what they mean is that it will take twenty minutes for you to reach the front door so that you can take a number and wait in a line that will take another three hours. Good thing they don't charge for parking. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 22:02 yes Now that Gay marriage is legal in more than half the states in the U.S. we no longer have to worry about young Lesbians bringing the U-Haul to the second date. Now we have to worry about the long waiting list at the Little White Chapel in Las Vegas and the scarcity of wedding cakes all over the country. At least the wedding flowers can be recycled, since the divorces will be happening before the flowers lose their scent. Sun, 2 Mar 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-03-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c07a6799-cfdf-4e2c-90d0-1d5cb718cadc 571 Book Report Now that Gay marriage is legal in more than half the states in the U.S. we no longer have to worry about young Lesbians bringing the U-Haul to the second date. Now we have to worry about the long waiting list at the Little White Chapel in Las Vegas and the scarcity of wedding cakes all over the country. At least the wedding flowers can be recycled, since the divorces will be happening before the flowers lose their scent. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:35 yes Chalk one up for the Girl Scouts and their entrepreneurial spirit. Instead of trying to hawk cookies outside the grocery store where someone has just purchased two boxes of the generic cookies that were on sale for 99 cents, they decided to take their business right to where their customers are. The Girl Scouts have set up shop right outside the pot store, and sales have never been better. Wed, 26 Feb 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-02-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3a4c8ad0-9744-4934-9793-072b458661ff 570 Trans Fat Chalk one up for the Girl Scouts and their entrepreneurial spirit. Instead of trying to hawk cookies outside the grocery store where someone has just purchased two boxes of the generic cookies that were on sale for 99 cents, they decided to take their business right to where their customers are. The Girl Scouts have set up shop right outside the pot store, and sales have never been better. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:03 yes Now that football is over for the season, Lesbians hardly know what to do with themselves on a Sunday afternoon. Well, we have the solution. It's called Lesbian Grocery Store Sunday. Instead of trolling the online dating forums, simply don your best looking pair of sweats and head to the grocery store. Find a hot chick, check out her cart to see if you're compatible, and she could be moving in with you by next weekend. Sun, 23 Feb 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-02-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast aaeee139-ea74-4790-afae-7a4753b6dd78 569 Lesbian Grocery Sunday Now that football is over for the season, Lesbians hardly know what to do with themselves on a Sunday afternoon. Well, we have the solution. It's called Lesbian Grocery Store Sunday. Instead of trolling the online dating forums, simply don your best looking pair of sweats and head to the grocery store. Find a hot chick, check out her cart to see if you're compatible, and she could be moving in with you by next weekend. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:51 yes You can brag about the length. You can take pride in the girth. You can brag all you want about how you know how to use that thing to its maximum advantage. You might even think you're awesome because you have two. Well, you've got nothing on us Lesbians. Each Lesbian has an average of 3.5 in a drawer next to their beds...and they never go limp. Wed, 19 Feb 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-02-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 16a04bcb-a748-4661-bd5f-90e4bfb13336 568 Hard Ons You can brag about the length. You can take pride in the girth. You can brag all you want about how you know how to use that thing to its maximum advantage. You might even think you're awesome because you have two. Well, you've got nothing on us Lesbians. Each Lesbian has an average of 3.5 in a drawer next to their beds...and they never go limp. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:43 yes There's a reason the human brain chooses to repress certain memories. It's a protective mechanism so that you can live with yourself and the people around you by conveniently forgetting the most traumatic memories of your life. Not just any memories, but the kind of memories where your mother walks in on you and your iPad while you're sitting on the toilet taking a crap. Sun, 16 Feb 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-02-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 542e90a1-1ddd-499e-94c2-477b7e583280 567 Repressed Memories There's a reason the human brain chooses to repress certain memories. It's a protective mechanism so that you can live with yourself and the people around you by conveniently forgetting the most traumatic memories of your life. Not just any memories, but the kind of memories where your mother walks in on you and your iPad while you're sitting on the toilet taking a crap. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:42 yes Bigfoot used to be no big deal, but once there was a $10 million Bigfoot challenge...now it's on. For $10 million you're ready to have Bigfoot's baby, and you'll go down on Mrs. Bigfoot just to make sure you clinch the deal. Who cares if she hasn't shaved that bush in the last two decades? For $10 million...it's all worth it. Wed, 12 Feb 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-02-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast fe067ee4-26a9-4e4f-8e02-756850672efe 566 Mrs Sasquatch Bigfoot used to be no big deal, but once there was a $10 million Bigfoot challenge...now it's on. For $10 million you're ready to have Bigfoot's baby, and you'll go down on Mrs. Bigfoot just to make sure you clinch the deal. Who cares if she hasn't shaved that bush in the last two decades? For $10 million...it's all worth it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:08 yes Fund-raisers are a dime a dozen these days. Everyone is riding their bike, running a marathon or dancing all night long to raise money for one charity or another. If your friends are suffering from fund-raising fatigue and they don't want to donate money for another cause, it's time to big out the big guns. Invite them to an event where women are removing their clothes and dancing on poles, and you'll be able to meet your fund-raising goal in one hour or less. Sun, 26 Jan 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-01-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 2e919858-9369-4937-ab0c-613706f20350 565 Pits and Ass Fund-raisers are a dime a dozen these days. Everyone is riding their bike, running a marathon or dancing all night long to raise money for one charity or another. If your friends are suffering from fund-raising fatigue and they don't want to donate money for another cause, it's time to big out the big guns. Invite them to an event where women are removing their clothes and dancing on poles, and you'll be able to meet your fund-raising goal in one hour or less. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:37 yes If you're going to throw a loud party that lasts all night long you want to make sure nobody in the neighborhood spoils your fun by calling the cops. Don't take any chances. All you have to do is to bring the Grilled Cheese truck and invite a couple of token Lesbians to your party. If you don't know any token Lesbians just contact us. We'll hook you up. Don't forget the tater tots. Wed, 22 Jan 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-01-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4f77f1b9-b2f4-4e1c-ab15-ea498c22d41a 564 Love Canal If you're going to throw a loud party that lasts all night long you want to make sure nobody in the neighborhood spoils your fun by calling the cops. Don't take any chances. All you have to do is to bring the Grilled Cheese truck and invite a couple of token Lesbians to your party. If you don't know any token Lesbians just contact us. We'll hook you up. Don't forget the tater tots. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:55 yes If you want to avoid the flu this season you can install hand sanitizer stations in every room in your house, you can carry anti-bacterial wipes with you everywhere you go, and you can choose only to give fist bumps instead of handshakes or hugs. Or, you can simply get a flu shot and stop whining. Sat, 18 Jan 2014 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2014-01-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a6ec1e47-c4d0-435e-a4df-c804f8a7bfff 563 I'm Next If you want to avoid the flu this season you can install hand sanitizer stations in every room in your house, you can carry anti-bacterial wipes with you everywhere you go, and you can choose only to give fist bumps instead of handshakes or hugs. Or, you can simply get a flu shot and stop whining. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:18 yes As you get older and start losing your vision, it doesn't become any less important to continue keeping up with good vag-scaping habits. Just because you can't see your bush, doesn't mean it doesn't require some regular grooming and upkeep. You can go out and get yourself a good bush-trimmer with all the accoutrements...or you can take your chances with some unscrupulous young lady from Craig's List. Just don't be surprised if she carves a pentagram in your bush and dyes it blue. Wed, 11 Dec 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-12-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 42b3d48f-175a-4b6e-a8ba-481db3ae0636 562 Blind Bush As you get older and start losing your vision, it doesn't become any less important to continue keeping up with good vag-scaping habits. Just because you can't see your bush, doesn't mean it doesn't require some regular grooming and upkeep. You can go out and get yourself a good bush-trimmer with all the accoutrements...or you can take your chances with some unscrupulous young lady from Craig's List. Just don't be surprised if she carves a pentagram in your bush and dyes it blue. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:17 yes When we invite them into our homes, our dogs become part of our family. Or, maybe we really become part of their pack. They share their lives with us, they show us unconditional love and they are loyal to the end. So, when a dog passes over we feel that we've lost a little piece of ourselves in the process. Not so for cats....just kidding, Lesbians! Sun, 8 Dec 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-12-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast d585ce66-bafd-43f9-9b86-a7d7bb665413 561 Bye Bye Bosco When we invite them into our homes, our dogs become part of our family. Or, maybe we really become part of their pack. They share their lives with us, they show us unconditional love and they are loyal to the end. So, when a dog passes over we feel that we've lost a little piece of ourselves in the process. Not so for cats....just kidding, Lesbians! 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:27 yes Sometimes you just want to kick back and enjoy a good movie. You want to sit in the movie theater, relax and enjoy some passive entertainment. It's all good until you realize the move is subtitled and you have to work at reading the movie instead of watching it. If I wanted to read the book...I would have stayed at home. Then the sex scene starts... Wed, 4 Dec 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-12-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 350b5188-bc80-46c4-9060-570ce1980370 560 Three Minutes Sometimes you just want to kick back and enjoy a good movie. You want to sit in the movie theater, relax and enjoy some passive entertainment. It's all good until you realize the move is subtitled and you have to work at reading the movie instead of watching it. If I wanted to read the book...I would have stayed at home. Then the sex scene starts.... 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 27:06 yes Family traditions are a beautiful part of celebrating the holidays. These are the moments that create memories that will live on forever as part of your family heritage. The only reason that family traditions carry on is because the holidays come around only once a year. It takes an entire year to recover from the shock, the anger and the stress that occurs when all the carefully laid plans breakdown, somebody gets pissed off, somebody has a meltdown, and more than one person winds up needing a change of clothes. Happy Holidays. Sun, 1 Dec 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-12-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e58fec0d-8d28-47c3-95de-4c6029c14bff 559 Holiday Traditions Family traditions are a beautiful part of celebrating the holidays. These are the moments that create memories that will live on forever as part of your family heritage. The only reason that family traditions carry on is because the holidays come around only once a year. It takes an entire year to recover from the shock, the anger and the stress that occurs when all the carefully laid plans breakdown, somebody gets pissed off, somebody has a meltdown, and more than one person winds up needing a change of clothes. Happy Holidays. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 30:06 yes With Thanksgiving right around the corner, it's time to kick off the holiday season in style. It's time to sit in front of your computer to type that annual holiday letter to all your friends, family and people you care about to tell them what you've been up to all year long. Of course if you really gave a shit about them you might have actually picked up the phone once or twice throughout the year instead of contacting them once a year with some ridiculous form letter that nobody wants to read anyway. Wed, 27 Nov 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-11-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 2f394d94-0c59-45da-8905-b971d320d738 558 Sheeeeet With Thanksgiving right around the corner, it's time to kick off the holiday season in style. It's time to sit in front of your computer to type that annual holiday letter to all your friends, family and people you care about to tell them what you've been up to all year long. Of course if you really gave a shit about them you might have actually picked up the phone once or twice throughout the year instead of contacting them once a year with some ridiculous form letter that nobody wants to read anyway. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 20:20 yes Mommy and Me classes used to be a nice safe place to bring your babies and toddlers. You could relax in the company of other moms and their kids while you learned new things about having children and raising a family. It was a protected space where you knew nothing would go wrong and you would have to worry about anything. And then one day...the Lesbian showed up. Wed, 20 Nov 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-11-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0959a1a7-384d-4421-8add-89efd6ea7bd4 557 Mommy and Me Mommy and Me classes used to be a nice safe place to bring your babies and toddlers. You could relax in the company of other moms and their kids while you learned new things about having children and raising a family. It was a protected space where you knew nothing would go wrong and you would have to worry about anything. And then one day...the Lesbian showed up. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 18:39 yes There really is a place where it doesn't matter which ethnic background you come from, which religion you are, your gender or your sexual orientation. Try calling a government office to make an appointment and everyone from any walk of life will suffer equally. You'll be stuck in a voice telephone system that's impossible to navigate and then after waiting on hold for hours, you'll be disconnected as soon as someone comes on the line. Equality for all. Sun, 17 Nov 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-11-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e104384f-cde9-4862-ab19-1af5f16265045 556 Racist Homophobe There really is a place where it doesn't matter which ethnic background you come from, which religion you are, your gender or your sexual orientation. Try calling a government office to make an appointment and everyone from any walk of life will suffer equally. You'll be stuck in a voice telephone system that's impossible to navigate and then after waiting on hold for hours, you'll be disconnected as soon as someone comes on the line. Equality for all. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:14 yes Lesson learned. Buy American and you won't have to worry about importing all kinds of foreign bugs and larva that will burrow into your skin and erupt with millions of babies that you now have to raise and take care of as your own. One baby is just plenty. Wed, 13 Nov 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-11-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 048c41b3-8711-4f0f-ada1-19da698c2ed5 555 Monsters Inside Me Lesson learned. Buy American and you won't have to worry about importing all kinds of foreign bugs and larva that will burrow into your skin and erupt with millions of babies that you now have to raise and take care of as your own. One baby is just plenty. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:01 yes When the Gaybee of the neighborhood wants to go trick or treating on Halloween, the neighbors better not have anything to say about the Gaybee coming to their door twice for candy. Not unless they want the Lesbian Mom to pull out a can of Dyke-Ass on them. And...nobody better have anything to say about Superman wearing a diaper. Sun, 10 Nov 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-11-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 31ebecf6-1d8a-4e77-aea0-c90cd0cbe775 554 Superman When the Gaybee of the neighborhood wants to go trick or treating on Halloween, the neighbors better not have anything to say about the Gaybee coming to their door twice for candy. Not unless they want the Lesbian Mom to pull out a can of Dyke-Ass on them. And...nobody better have anything to say about Superman wearing a diaper. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:55 yes Pedophiles have become very clever in the means they use to try and lure kids away. That's why it's important for your kids to have a safe word they can use with a stranger that approaches to offer them a ride or some candy. The only parents that don't need to worry when a stranger comes up to their kid and says, "Your mom asked me to pick you up from school today" is the kid with two Gay Dads. Wed, 6 Nov 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-11-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4e09afd6-2915-4814-af03-c1e831b9cbb0 553 Celine is Dead Pedophiles have become very clever in the means they use to try and lure kids away. That's why it's important for your kids to have a safe word they can use with a stranger that approaches to offer them a ride or some candy. The only parents that don't need to worry when a stranger comes up to their kid and says, "Your mom asked me to pick you up from school today" is the kid with two Gay Dads. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:45 yes It's not that Lesbians don't like Martha Stewart. We enjoy a nice afternoon of crafting as much as the straight girls next door. It's just that "crafting" for Lesbians includes putting up shelves, building a new addition on the house, and installing a pergola and a fire pit in the backyard. "Dykes on a Dyme" will show you how at: youtube.com/dykesonadyme. Sun, 3 Nov 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-11-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c9299481-5f6d-4825-a218-2c8969e964ea 552 Martha Stewart for Men It's not that Lesbians don't like Martha Stewart. We enjoy a nice afternoon of crafting as much as the straight girls next door. It's just that "crafting" for Lesbians includes putting up shelves, building a new addition on the house, and installing a pergola and a fire pit in the backyard. "Dykes on a Dyme" will show you how at: youtube.com/dykesonadyme. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:08 yes Smart phones in the hands of stupid people - it's either an oxymoron or just a really bad idea. Before anyone is allowed to leave the Verizon store with a new phone they should be forced to take an IQ test and then be mandated to download, and register for, the Common Sense App. If you refuse to take the test, then you get a Blackberry instead. Wed, 30 Oct 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-10-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast df76938b-e4cb-48d9-8ad1-02cdfb7ad506 551 Common Sense App Smart phones in the hands of stupid people - it's either an oxymoron or just a really bad idea. Before anyone is allowed to leave the Verizon store with a new phone they should be forced to take an IQ test and then be mandated to download, and register for, the Common Sense App. If you refuse to take the test, then you get a Blackberry instead. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:04 yes Conventional wisdom says that you should never pay for your whores with your credit card. Not only does it leave a tell-tale paper trail, but you also run the risk of your wife finding out about all your extracurricular activities. Then again, you're missing all those frequent flyer miles and rewards points you could be accruing with all those expensive purchases. It might be a worthwhile trade-off. Sun, 27 Oct 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-10-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 14151fea-c38e-4864-a3f5-890fd80df6e8 550 Death by Late Fee Conventional wisdom says that you should never pay for your whores with your credit card. Not only does it leave a tell-tale paper trail, but you also run the risk of your wife finding out about all your extracurricular activities. Then again, you're missing all those frequent flyer miles and rewards points you could be accruing with all those expensive purchases. It might be a worthwhile trade-off. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:06 yes One of the most altruistic gestures a human being can do is to donate their organs to another person when they die. Why should fake boobs be any different? There must be some needy, flat-chested young lady that can't afford fake boobs by herself. You could change her life forever by allowing her to take over your boobs once you're gone. Besides, the coffin isn't going to close if you leave them in. Wed, 23 Oct 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-10-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e5fe09c8-694c-4184-aa03-45b118876975 549 Boobs For Eternity One of the most altruistic gestures a human being can do is to donate their organs to another person when they die. Why should fake boobs be any different? There must be some needy, flat-chested young lady that can't afford fake boobs by herself. You could change her life forever by allowing her to take over your boobs once you're gone. Besides, the coffin isn't going to close if you leave them in. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:39 yes The Affordable Care Act is a wonderful thing. No longer do you have to walk around with a mole the size of a quarter on your face, just waiting for it to turn into a cancerous mass. Instead you can choose to groom the hairs coming out the mole and style it in the theme of the nearest holiday. Who doesn't look good with mole hairs dyed green for St. Patty's Day? Sun, 20 Oct 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-10-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a99f4247-2d9f-4188-bd7c-e60f75fb7362 548 Deep Fried Butter The Affordable Care Act is a wonderful thing. No longer do you have to walk around with a mole the size of a quarter on your face, just waiting for it to turn into a cancerous mass. Instead you can choose to groom the hairs coming out the mole and style it in the theme of the nearest holiday. Who doesn't look good with mole hairs dyed green for St. Patty's Day? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:01 yes When you were a little child your parents thought your were The Gift. You were the perfect child, you could do no wrong and you could get away with anything. Now that the Grandkid has come along, you've been regifted. The only reason you're invited on family vacations now is so that you can bring the New Gift...and to do the cooking. Wed, 16 Oct 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-10-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 15b2a755-a9b3-4cd2-b473-1e20f75bab0e 547 Regifted When you were a little child your parents thought your were The Gift. You were the perfect child, you could do no wrong and you could get away with anything. Now that the Grandkid has come along, you've been regifted. The only reason you're invited on family vacations now is so that you can bring the New Gift...and to do the cooking. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:36 yes Being a parent is like being abducted by aliens. You have lapses of time that you just can't account for and you're not at all sure what's happened during that time. One minute you were all packed and ready to to go somewhere, and the next thing you know it's an hour later and the baby has vomited all over himself while you're on the freeway in rush hour traffic in the car pool lane. You don't really have an explanation for all the lost time, but you can't guarantee you weren't anal probed either. Sun, 13 Oct 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-10-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7a4088fc-a594-49ea-aa73-37d9a8262c86 546 Perfect Parents Being a parent is like being abducted by aliens. You have lapses of time that you just can't account for and you're not at all sure what's happened during that time. One minute you were all packed and ready to to go somewhere, and the next thing you know it's an hour later and the baby has vomited all over himself while you're on the freeway in rush hour traffic in the car pool lane. You don't really have an explanation for all the lost time, but you can't guarantee you weren't anal probed either. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:40 yes Cigarettes are not addictive. Tell that to you mother who is recovering from nose reconstruction surgery and needs a cigarette so bad that she tapes her glasses to her forehead and drives her car to the farthest 7-11 she can find so that she can pick up a pack of cigarettes without any of the regulars at the store seeing her with raccoon eyes. Fri, 31 May 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-05-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3ab24b3e-2356-43cb-ac1b-833a26c00239 545 Black Lungs Cigarettes are not addictive. Tell that to you mother who is recovering from nose reconstruction surgery and needs a cigarette so bad that she tapes her glasses to her forehead and drives her car to the farthest 7-11 she can find so that she can pick up a pack of cigarettes without any of the regulars at the store seeing her with raccoon eyes. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:41 yes Just as Batman has a Batmobile, MILF's need to have a MILF mobile. The only problem is that MILF mobile has to go when the kids come along...unless you have a few hot au pairs that drive your kids around in the Range Rover with the car seats while you head down to West Hollywood in your convertible. All this happens while the wife is at work...of course. Tue, 28 May 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-05-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 648d6e90-24e7-4296-a14f-1b4714540b90 544 MILF Mobile Just as Batman has a Batmobile, MILF's need to have a MILF mobile. The only problem is that MILF mobile has to go when the kids come along...unless you have a few hot au pairs that drive your kids around in the Range Rover with the car seats while you head down to West Hollywood in your convertible. All this happens while the wife is at work...of course. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:38 yes It might be worth it to go to a restaurant you're not terribly fond of to each cubed meats and vegetables if you were able to grill your wife's friend about her sex life when she was married to a Gay man. Hell, it might even be worth paying for the whole dinner. Suddenly, iceberg lettuce with strange orange salad dressing got a whole lot more interesting. Sun, 19 May 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-05-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 27cdec86-7aa1-4290-af5f-fc5b16778d4b 543 Cubed Steak It might be worth it to go to a restaurant you're not terribly fond of to each cubed meats and vegetables if you were able to grill your wife's friend about her sex life when she was married to a Gay man. Hell, it might even be worth paying for the whole dinner. Suddenly, iceberg lettuce with strange orange salad dressing got a whole lot more interesting. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 22:24 yes If you want to take your baby to Hooters to celebrate Mother's Day just because they have $10 off Mom's meal when you bring your children...that's on you. It's probably safe to say that the church ladies in the mall parking lot with Grandma, the Mom and the 4 month old baby probably don't care that they can save $10 when the scantily clad girls in underwear and tank tops serve them sliders with blue cheese. You'll probably get what you deserve for that transgression anyway. Tue, 14 May 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-05-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f9a09e62-0db0-4855-b197-e436454b3cbb 542 Booters If you want to take your baby to Hooters to celebrate Mother's Day just because they have $10 off Mom's meal when you bring your children...that's on you. It's probably safe to say that the church ladies in the mall parking lot with Grandma, the Mom and the 4 month old baby probably don't care that they can save $10 when the scantily clad girls in underwear and tank tops serve them sliders with blue cheese. You'll probably get what you deserve for that transgression anyway. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 18:45 yes It's important to be a good role model for our kids and to help our community. When someone needs a helping hand, it's an opportunity to set a good example by doing whatever you can to reach out and help. It's in that spirit that we're gathering friends and family together to help us send 100 cases of Clorox Urine Cleaner to Connecticut to help clean up the hundreds of jugs of urine that the State doesn't know what to do with. Tue, 7 May 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-05-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 60870cc4-c9f5-43b4-bc7c-c1bc882ded9e 541 Leave Connecticut Alone It's important to be a good role model for our kids and to help our community. When someone needs a helping hand, it's an opportunity to set a good example by doing whatever you can to reach out and help. It's in that spirit that we're gathering friends and family together to help us send 100 cases of Clorox Urine Cleaner to Connecticut to help clean up the hundreds of jugs of urine that the State doesn't know what to do with. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:11 yes There's nothing like some comfort food to make you feel all warm and happy inside. Fresh out of the oven chocolate cookies, a steaming plate of homemade macaroni and cheese or a piping hot chicken pot pie. It seems almost impossible to screw that up, unless you decided to use the generic, dented can of vegetables with botulism oozing out, topped it off with a cup of black pepper, and then served it all wrapped up in a frozen Pillsbury croissant the size of a football. Delicious. Sun, 28 Apr 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-04-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5d6b0bf3-d059-44e8-b102-dbcbcdc26579 540 Football Pot Pie There's nothing like some comfort food to make you feel all warm and happy inside. Fresh out of the oven chocolate cookies, a steaming plate of homemade macaroni and cheese or a piping hot chicken pot pie. It seems almost impossible to screw that up, unless you decided to use the generic, dented can of vegetables with botulism oozing out, topped it off with a cup of black pepper, and then served it all wrapped up in a frozen Pillsbury croissant the size of a football. Delicious. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:38 yes Everyone has price. So what if you have to walk around on a disabled cruise ship for a week with feces up to your ankles and no chance of getting soft-serve ice cream 'round the clock for the entire week. Throw in a good, heavy period with no tampons or pads, so that you have to walk around wearing a red bag like a diaper all week. Give me two or three free cruises plus $500 and we'll call it even. But...I am going to need a balcony upgrade. Wed, 24 Apr 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-04-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4ba8caff-768c-4f74-87a8-88adb9e813f3 539 Bring a Flashlight Everyone has price. So what if you have to walk around on a disabled cruise ship for a week with feces up to your ankles and no chance of getting soft-serve ice cream 'round the clock for the entire week. Throw in a good, heavy period with no tampons or pads, so that you have to walk around wearing a red bag like a diaper all week. Give me two or three free cruises plus $500 and we'll call it even. But...I am going to need a balcony upgrade. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:27 yes When living without sleep becomes a way of life you get used to. When you can get up 5 times in the middle of the night and learn how to go right back to sleep. When you can run the gauntlet of children's toys in the middle of the living room without twisting an ankle. And, when you can start to imagine your wife as the hot au pair sleeping next to you in the bed at night...that's when you realize it's official. The tiny little baby you brought home 7 months ago is now officially your legally adopted son. Life is good. Sun, 21 Apr 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-04-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 59e50174-3df7-490f-a74d-20248ff29910 538 It's Official When living without sleep becomes a way of life you get used to. When you can get up 5 times in the middle of the night and learn how to go right back to sleep. When you can run the gauntlet of children's toys in the middle of the living room without twisting an ankle. And, when you can start to imagine your wife as the hot au pair sleeping next to you in the bed at night...that's when you realize it's official. The tiny little baby you brought home 7 months ago is now officially your legally adopted son. Life is good. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:33 yes A Super Wife is not your ordinary wife. This is one that still takes you out for a romantic Valentine's Day affair, even after 14 years. She's the one that takes you to that special restaurant at the strip mall where you play a sexy game of "spot the Dyke"...just like when you first met. Next time, Ladies, don't make it so easy by putting a "Yes I Am" license plate frame on your car. Wed, 6 Mar 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-03-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 354fe8de-fe8e-4f88-82b3-491eead62027 537 Super Wife A Super Wife is not your ordinary wife. This is one that still takes you out for a romantic Valentine's Day affair, even after 14 years. She's the one that takes you to that special restaurant at the strip mall where you play a sexy game of "spot the Dyke"...just like when you first met. Next time, Ladies, don't make it so easy by putting a "Yes I Am" license plate frame on your car. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:15 yes Four more states that now allow Gay marriage, the first out Lesbian Senator, a President of the United States acknowledges Gay history for the very first time, and we have two challenges headed to the Supreme Court regarding DOMA and Gay marriage. A couple of months in, and 2013 is already a great year. Of course, Ethan won't be happy until his moms can be legally married in every state in the US...and he is going to let everyone know that he is not happy until that happens. Wed, 13 Feb 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-02-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c4c396aa-13cd-4de7-85a3-f25eefe28e50 536 Odd Year Four more states that now allow Gay marriage, the first out Lesbian Senator, a President of the United States acknowledges Gay history for the very first time, and we have two challenges headed to the Supreme Court regarding DOMA and Gay marriage. A couple of months in, and 2013 is already a great year. Of course, Ethan won't be happy until his moms can be legally married in every state in the US...and he is going to let everyone know that he is not happy until that happens. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:15 yes Groupon is great for a lot of things. You can get great discounts on a dinner for two, a relaxing massage or a fishing trip with friends. What you never want to buy on Groupon is the offer to buy one plastic surgery and get one free...unless you want to have two soup bowls implanted in your butt cheeks. Sexy. Sun, 10 Feb 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-02-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 11752ce0-6da1-4aa1-ad07-f13172dd2bea 535 Pencil Lips Groupon is great for a lot of things. You can get great discounts on a dinner for two, a relaxing massage or a fishing trip with friends. What you never want to buy on Groupon is the offer to buy one plastic surgery and get one free...unless you want to have two soup bowls implanted in your butt cheeks. Sexy. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:10 yes If you walked up to a straight woman with a baby before you had a baby of your own, you would just be seen as a creepy Dyke trying to hit on a straight woman. Once you have a baby of your own, however, all the tables turn. Now you're a thoughtful mother who is interested in swapping baby secrets with someone else from the in-crowd...even if you spend the entire time staring at her cleavage. Thu, 31 Jan 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-01-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ff1fcf6b-0bd3-457e-b807-a09e71a72240 534 The In Crowd If you walked up to a straight woman with a baby before you had a baby of your own, you would just be seen as a creepy Dyke trying to hit on a straight woman. Once you have a baby of your own, however, all the tables turn. Now you're a thoughtful mother who is interested in swapping baby secrets with someone else from the in-crowd...even if you spend the entire time staring at her cleavage. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:43 yes These days it's just too dangerous to play the lottery and win. Friends and family drain your bank account, a new girlfriend moves in and suddenly you end up missing, or they find your dead body in a lake a few days after you collect your big check. It's much easier to get ripped off and lose all your money the old fashioned way. Let the tweaker move in, let her slowly drain all your bank accounts and max out your credit cards until you don't have anything left. Once she's done she simply moves on to the whore she's been already been sleeping on the side. At least she's not slipping cyanide in your drink. Sun, 27 Jan 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-01-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 61892af2-55cb-494a-9d9a-cff7ba5169dd 533 More Reasons These days it's just too dangerous to play the lottery and win. Friends and family drain your bank account, a new girlfriend moves in and suddenly you end up missing, or they find your dead body in a lake a few days after you collect your big check. It's much easier to get ripped off and lose all your money the old fashioned way. Let the tweaker move in, let her slowly drain all your bank accounts and max out your credit cards until you don't have anything left. Once she's done she simply moves on to the whore she's been already been sleeping on the side. At least she's not slipping cyanide in your drink. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:08 yes The best way to further the acceptance of Gay people in society is simply to be yourself and show people that you're a regular human being just like they are. The more people that know Gay people, the more people will realize being Gay is perfectly normal. Or, you can use the Roxanne method - next time you're in a group of straight people, make sure you put up your guard, decide that they are nasty, uptight human beings before you know anything about them, and then imitate their voice and make fun of their children that you don't even know. That's sure to further the cause of Gay people all over the world. Wed, 23 Jan 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-01-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5d5fabc5-586a-4674-8a72-7145c1c43bdc 532 Joiners The best way to further the acceptance of Gay people in society is simply to be yourself and show people that you're a regular human being just like they are. The more people that know Gay people, the more people will realize being Gay is perfectly normal. Or, you can use the Roxanne method - next time you're in a group of straight people, make sure you put up your guard, decide that they are nasty, uptight human beings before you know anything about them, and then imitate their voice and make fun of their children that you don't even know. That's sure to further the cause of Gay people all over the world. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:08 yes Any good parent wants to make sure that their kid has a positive childhood filled with lots of interesting experiences that they'll remember for the rest of their life. You want to enrich them with educational outings and fun-filled family trips. As you're thinking about where you might go and what you might do with your child, for most parents that might not include a visit to a Hookah bar or teaching them how to light things on fire so that you have a 20-foot bonfire. Sun, 20 Jan 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-01-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f029cd6a-e345-4ef2-8a7d-f2b56fd3dfa2 531 Whateves Any good parent wants to make sure that their kid has a positive childhood filled with lots of interesting experiences that they'll remember for the rest of their life. You want to enrich them with educational outings and fun-filled family trips. As you're thinking about where you might go and what you might do with your child, for most parents that might not include a visit to a Hookah bar or teaching them how to light things on fire so that you have a 20-foot bonfire. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:15 yes Straight people have ruined Sesame Street for everyone. Our son's best friend used to be Elmo, but now we have to find him another favorite toy because Elmo turned out to be a pedophile. Cookie Monster promotes childhood obesity, so that's out. Oscar the Grouch is rude and promotes bad manners. Big Bird may actually be the saving grace of Sesame Street, however. If Mit Romney hates Big Bird, then BB is my friend! Wed, 16 Jan 2013 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2013-01-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9bdff4b7-147a-4251-ba76-0fd927369ae0 530 Elmo Straight people have ruined Sesame Street for everyone. Our son's best friend used to be Elmo, but now we have to find him another favorite toy because Elmo turned out to be a pedophile. Cookie Monster promotes childhood obesity, so that's out. Oscar the Grouch is rude and promotes bad manners. Big Bird may actually be the saving grace of Sesame Street, however. If Mit Romney hates Big Bird, then BB is my friend! 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:45 yes Somehow the quality of the cleaning job no longer seems to matter once the topless maid service comes over to do a cleaning. You no longer care about the fact that the cobwebs are still hanging from the ceiling, the toilet doesn't look like it's been cleaned in months and the kitchen floor looks like it's been scrubbed with a napkin. Then you realize that they sent over the topless grandma with her pancake tits down to her knees. Now you'll pay extra just so that she doesn't clean topless. Sun, 2 Dec 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-12-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c5aa7fad-5027-4321-9c5a-a53e472c29e6 529 Topless Maid Service Somehow the quality of the cleaning job no longer seems to matter once the topless maid service comes over to do a cleaning. You no longer care about the fact that the cobwebs are still hanging from the ceiling, the toilet doesn't look like it's been cleaned in months and the kitchen floor looks like it's been scrubbed with a napkin. Then you realize that they sent over the topless grandma with her pancake tits down to her knees. Now you'll pay extra just so that she doesn't clean topless. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:43 yes Gone are the days when you'd meet someone at a bar, have a few beers and take them home. Now the dating world mostly happens online through dating web sites. That seems like a good way to meet someone until you realize that they're missing a very important check box for the Lesbian profile -- "will U-Haul on the second date". Check. Sun, 25 Nov 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-11-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8e34401f-f090-465a-9827-84c044b1c812 528 Two Tits Up Gone are the days when you'd meet someone at a bar, have a few beers and take them home. Now the dating world mostly happens online through dating web sites. That seems like a good way to meet someone until you realize that they're missing a very important check box for the Lesbian profile -- "will U-Haul on the second date". Check. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 20:34 yes It's important for businesses to market their products directly to the target audience to help increase sales and to become profitable. Take the Wet Lube company for example, they donate free trash cans at Pride events all over the country and also hand out free samples. Now that we have Viagra, however, Wet may be missing a key market segment. It's time to start putting the Wet trash cans at senior retirement communities all over the country now that old people are having sex again. Wear a condom. Wed, 14 Nov 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-11-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1a9169e1-bedb-4d33-840f-a1cffe98e0d7 527 Retro Bush It's important for businesses to market their products directly to the target audience to help increase sales and to become profitable. Take the Wet Lube company for example, they donate free trash cans at Pride events all over the country and also hand out free samples. Now that we have Viagra, however, Wet may be missing a key market segment. It's time to start putting the Wet trash cans at senior retirement communities all over the country now that old people are having sex again. Wear a condom. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:26 yes Congratulations to all the states that have now legalized Gay Marriage. As you bask in the euphoria of this incredible decision it's imperative that we reiterate our warning to all the young Gay couples...especially the overzealous Lesbians. Just because you are allowed to marry, doesn't mean you have to. I know you met her last week and she's the love of your life. Before you say "I do", make sure you've lived through a minimum of twelve menstrual cycles with her...and that's only before you move in together. Sun, 11 Nov 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-11-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5c6afe07-6b54-4260-8c3b-b7b22fcc8c67 526 Twelve Cycles Minimum Congratulations to all the states that have now legalized Gay Marriage. As you bask in the euphoria of this incredible decision it's imperative that we reiterate our warning to all the young Gay couples...especially the overzealous Lesbians. Just because you are allowed to marry, doesn't mean you have to. I know you met her last week and she's the love of your life. Before you say "I do", make sure you've lived through a minimum of twelve menstrual cycles with her...and that's only before you move in together. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:32 yes Halloween is the best holiday ever. On what other day can you walk an attractive cop into your house, wearing a smokin' hot, sexy uniform with a super-short skirt, in front of your wife and into your office, where you have a pull-out futon matress...and nobody even thinks twice about it? Sun, 4 Nov 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-11-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ce0b2521-597b-4bc0-8277-0fbde2d6a7ff 525 The Halloween That Almost Wasn't Halloween is the best holiday ever. On what other day can you walk an attractive cop into your house, wearing a smokin' hot, sexy uniform with a super-short skirt, in front of your wife and into your office, where you have a pull-out futon matress...and nobody even thinks twice about it? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:36 yes The truth is finally out about global warming. After all the talk about what's causing global warming, we realize it's not really about car emissions, cutting down the rain forest, or the fact that you refuse to recycle your plastic bottles. The real cause of global warming is all the lazy new Lesbian moms and Gay dads stuffing disposable diapers into landfills all across the country because they don't feel like cleaning out dozens of cloth diapers filled with smelly feces and urine every day. Wed, 31 Oct 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-10-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast beef861d-02c1-41fd-b170-2c9bb4ed4a09 524 Global Warming The truth is finally out about global warming. After all the talk about what's causing global warming, we realize it's not really about car emissions, cutting down the rain forest, or the fact that you refuse to recycle your plastic bottles. The real cause of global warming is all the lazy new Lesbian moms and Gay dads stuffing disposable diapers into landfills all across the country because they don't feel like cleaning out dozens of cloth diapers filled with smelly feces and urine every day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:57 yes Now that the Lesbians have adopted the cute baby that you don't have to lie about and say, "what soft skin your baby has", or "he has such a pretty eye"...the straight couples are now going to have to choose from the ugly babies that are left. The good news is that the baby with the beer belly and the buck teeth is still available for adoption. Sun, 28 Oct 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-10-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast fea10fb8-105e-40b3-8aa7-5356d9072d18 523 Support Hoes Now that the Lesbians have adopted the cute baby that you don't have to lie about and say, "what soft skin your baby has", or "he has such a pretty eye"...the straight couples are now going to have to choose from the ugly babies that are left. The good news is that the baby with the beer belly and the buck teeth is still available for adoption. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 19:23 yes So many questions, so little time. But, if there was just one question that absolutely had to be answered, it's this one. If one of the conjoined twins is straight and the other one is Gay, who gets to use the genitals when they're out on a double date? This is not about being politically correct. These are real problems that real people have. Sun, 14 Oct 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-10-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ee03d2a1-00fd-42d0-9c71-183083799e53 522 Conjoined So many questions, so little time. But, if there was just one question that absolutely had to be answered, it's this one. If one of the conjoined twins is straight and the other one is Gay, who gets to use the genitals when they're out on a double date? This is not about being politically correct. These are real problems that real people have. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:45 yes We have a new addition to the pack. It's not a gerbil, it's not a puppy, it's not a cat and it's not a baby chimpanzee. The new pack member comes with lots of cool new things to buy, magazines to subscribe to and endless fun for the relatives that can simply walk away when dirty diapers need changing. We may not be sleeping, but we couldn't be happier. Sun, 30 Sep 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-09-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b831034f-6781-4861-8a37-aa902b77efb7 521 New Addition We have a new addition to the pack. It's not a gerbil, it's not a puppy, it's not a cat and it's not a baby chimpanzee. The new pack member comes with lots of cool new things to buy, magazines to subscribe to and endless fun for the relatives that can simply walk away when dirty diapers need changing. We may not be sleeping, but we couldn't be happier. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:49 yes All straight men should be required to get a back wax at least once in their life. It's not because they need it and it's not necessarily because back hair is gross. It's more for the amusement of Lesbians and their friends. We're just freaky that way...and we like to watch. Sun, 9 Sep 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-09-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3145f11b-fac2-4f57-8145-e74fc417b986 520 Back Wax All straight men should be required to get a back wax at least once in their life. It's not because they need it and it's not necessarily because back hair is gross. It's more for the amusement of Lesbians and their friends. We're just freaky that way...and we like to watch. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:55 yes Which Lesbian has street smarts? When the zombie dripping with blood comes up to your tent on the beach and tries to get in to eat your brains, is it the Lesbian that tells the zombie to beat it and then goes rights back to sleep? Or, is it the Lesbian that decides she has a 50-50 chance if she jumps out of the tent, runs down the beach and leaves her friend to fend for herself? After all, the zombie can only eat one person at a time. Thu, 6 Sep 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-09-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 86ea4275-2915-43b4-bd72-fc9ce232e605 519 Zombie Beach Party Which Lesbian has street smarts? When the zombie dripping with blood comes up to your tent on the beach and tries to get in to eat your brains, is it the Lesbian that tells the zombie to beat it and then goes rights back to sleep? Or, is it the Lesbian that decides she has a 50-50 chance if she jumps out of the tent, runs down the beach and leaves her friend to fend for herself? After all, the zombie can only eat one person at a time. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:25 yes Neighborhood watch doesn't mean that you get together with a few neighbors for a few beers every night and check out all the cute girls and guys in the neighborhood. It also doesn't mean that you stay in the house and peek through the blinds when you hear something strange going on outside. What it does mean is that once trouble starts, you go get the Postal Service Lesbian down the street that can hold her little dog in one hand and kick the crap out of any perp that comes into the neighborhood with the other. Mon, 3 Sep 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-09-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 15fb9b3b-ded3-48f5-ad02-3bd682b5c7dc 518 Gayborhood Watch Neighborhood watch doesn't mean that you get together with a few neighbors for a few beers every night and check out all the cute girls and guys in the neighborhood. It also doesn't mean that you stay in the house and peek through the blinds when you hear something strange going on outside. What it does mean is that once trouble starts, you go get the Postal Service Lesbian down the street that can hold her little dog in one hand and kick the crap out of any perp that comes into the neighborhood with the other. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:19 yes It's hard to believe how far technology has advanced, especially in the last few years. Despite all that forward movement, there is still one thing you can count on to stay exactly the same. If you need to mail something at the post office, you may as well hop in your car and drive across town to deliver it yourself. If the package has to go across the country, you may as well just hop on a plane and take it with you. The cost of the parking ticket, the time you'll spend waiting in line, and the years it takes off your life from the aggravation are all lower prices to pay than having to actually go into a post office to do your business. Not to mention that your hair is not getting any less gray. Sat, 25 Aug 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-08-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3152781a-1162-4a78-a18d-cbe5587484e7 517 Five Fifteen It's hard to believe how far technology has advanced, especially in the last few years. Despite all that forward movement, there is still one thing you can count on to stay exactly the same. If you need to mail something at the post office, you may as well hop in your car and drive across town to deliver it yourself. If the package has to go across the country, you may as well just hop on a plane and take it with you. The cost of the parking ticket, the time you'll spend waiting in line, and the years it takes off your life from the aggravation are all lower prices to pay than having to actually go into a post office to do your business. Not to mention that your hair is not getting any less gray. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:02 yes Roxanne is going straight to hell. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Virginia is going with her as an accomplice. There really isn't anything more to say. At least we now know that hell is located in Van Nuys, California. They might have a cafeteria, or they might have a buffet. Nobody is really sure. Wed, 22 Aug 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-08-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 00a78835-2c8f-40b7-b163-c053c6adab56 516 Smile Roxanne is going straight to hell. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Virginia is going with her as an accomplice. There really isn't anything more to say. At least we now know that hell is located in Van Nuys, California. They might have a cafeteria, or they might have a buffet. Nobody is really sure. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:41 yes We may still be pissed that Womens' Softball is no longer part of the Olympics and that some American dykes were forced to wear a skirt in the Opening Ceremonies, but at least most countries kept to the tradition of wearing skimpy bikinis for Beach Volleyball. Having Brazil host the next summer Olympics is not too bad either. Start stocking up on the razors and Nair now. Sun, 19 Aug 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-08-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7da93ec6-24f8-4dfb-9a66-117773d64664 515 Brazil Wins We may still be pissed that Womens' Softball is no longer part of the Olympics and that some American dykes were forced to wear a skirt in the Opening Ceremonies, but at least most countries kept to the tradition of wearing skimpy bikinis for Beach Volleyball. Having Brazil host the next summer Olympics is not too bad either. Start stocking up on the razors and Nair now. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:30 yes Everyone likes to have good neighbors that they can rely on when you need a little help. Someone to borrow a cup of sugar from, someone to help cut down tree branches, or just someone to chit chat with while you're out walking the dog in the neighborhood. But, when being a good neighbor means stroking your dog's dick...in some cultures that may be considered crossing a line. Sun, 12 Aug 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-08-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3e185235-0468-4411-a03d-ceac52c43b33 514 Do The Dog Everyone likes to have good neighbors that they can rely on when you need a little help. Someone to borrow a cup of sugar from, someone to help cut down tree branches, or just someone to chit chat with while you're out walking the dog in the neighborhood. But, when being a good neighbor means stroking your dog's dick...in some cultures that may be considered crossing a line. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:03 yes It's always nice to have visitors come over and stay for a while...until they start camping out at your house, eating all your food, bugging you to drive them everywhere and practically start moving in. It's times like these that you start to yearn for the good 'ol days when visitors came to you in the middle of the night, they gave you a quick anal probe and then hopped back on their ship in a beam of light never to be seen or heard from again. Wed, 1 Aug 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-08-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 2f85ae45-46a6-442b-be0e-5fb7c2677f91 513 Visitors It's always nice to have visitors come over and stay for a while...until they start camping out at your house, eating all your food, bugging you to drive them everywhere and practically start moving in. It's times like these that you start to yearn for the good 'ol days when visitors came to you in the middle of the night, they gave you a quick anal probe and then hopped back on their ship in a beam of light never to be seen or heard from again. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:16 yes Your mother brought you up to have good common sense. No matter how much fun someone tells you it will be, and how much it will change your life, you would never walk across burning hot coals in just your bare feet. Of course not. You would, however, do a bungee jump dangling from a rickety crane in a parking lot in Mexico after a few shots of tequila. Sun, 29 Jul 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-07-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast d9f8ac99-117e-49b4-8b04-7ce9b6ce4e9a 512 Hot Coals Your mother brought you up to have good common sense. No matter how much fun someone tells you it will be, and how much it will change your life, you would never walk across burning hot coals in just your bare feet. Of course not. You would, however, do a bungee jump dangling from a rickety crane in a parking lot in Mexico after a few shots of tequila. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:48 yes There should be a general moratorium on when during the year people are allowed to move. During the winter when it's icy and snowing, or when it's the rainy season and wet all the time, those periods of time are off limits for moving. This is simply a public service for all the people that have to come out in inclement weather to help you move...with their high hopes of being able to "stick it in" one day by being a good friend helping you move. Thu, 19 Jul 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-07-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1d37ba98-8b8c-4b53-a9b0-9e24a11b5fa9 511 Hetero Mating Rituals There should be a general moratorium on when during the year people are allowed to move. During the winter when it's icy and snowing, or when it's the rainy season and wet all the time, those periods of time are off limits for moving. This is simply a public service for all the people that have to come out in inclement weather to help you move...with their high hopes of being able to "stick it in" one day by being a good friend helping you move. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:38 yes You should always strive to your best in everything you do. It's important to give it your all and really put your heart into it to be the best you can be. Once you've blown your wad and put forth your very best effort, even if you didn't come in first you can still feel good about it...until someone tells you that you're second best...out of two. Wed, 11 Jul 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-07-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast d05b2168-de45-4dfe-ad9e-e0f9a584862a 510 Second Best You should always strive to your best in everything you do. It's important to give it your all and really put your heart into it to be the best you can be. Once you've blown your wad and put forth your very best effort, even if you didn't come in first you can still feel good about it...until someone tells you that you're second best...out of two. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:17 yes It's not a neuroses, it's a strategy. When you go to the grocery store you have to know how to size up the different checkout lines. You have to be a able to quickly decide which line will move the fastest, which one has the cashier with the most nimble hands, who knows the code for Belgian Endive without looking it up, and which line has the grenade that will pull out 100 coupons and pay in pennies. It may look neurotic to the uneducated... when really it's a finely honed skill that takes years of practice. Sun, 8 Jul 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-07-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b7903aef-f966-4ce5-93d2-ecec855d0203 509 Grocery Store Grenade It's not a neuroses, it's a strategy. When you go to the grocery store you have to know how to size up the different checkout lines. You have to be a able to quickly decide which line will move the fastest, which one has the cashier with the most nimble hands, who knows the code for Belgian Endive without looking it up, and which line has the grenade that will pull out 100 coupons and pay in pennies. It may look neurotic to the uneducated... when really it's a finely honed skill that takes years of practice. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:17 yes New trends tend to spring up overnight. Most people are fickle, and they don't stick with any one thing for too long before they start looking for something new and exciting. The one trend you don't want to hear about, however, is that people are starting to eat other people. Can't we just go back to simpler times when the latest trends were hoola-hoops, Squirmles and French Star jeans? Wed, 4 Jul 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-07-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 49767d85-915e-44f7-a391-e85d29e21df8 508 Not Right New trends tend to spring up overnight. Most people are fickle, and they don't stick with any one thing for too long before they start looking for something new and exciting. The one trend you don't want to hear about, however, is that people are starting to eat other people. Can't we just go back to simpler times when the latest trends were hoola-hoops, Squirmles and French Star jeans? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:15 yes If you really want to fight obesity in America, and you're really serious about it, the answer is not to force stores to sell carbonated drinks under 16 ounces in size. The answer is first to shut down all the McDonald's in America, secondly to stop the Little Caesar's two for one pizza deal, and the third is to replace all the Coke and Pepsi on store shelves with look-alike cola that tastes like crap. That will cause all American's to stop drinking soda altogether. It's not a consipiracy...it's a well thought out plan by the government. Sun, 1 Jul 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-07-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c5fb1399-23aa-498b-a669-6735529c6775 507 Koka Kola If you really want to fight obesity in America, and you're really serious about it, the answer is not to force stores to sell carbonated drinks under 16 ounces in size. The answer is first to shut down all the McDonald's in America, secondly to stop the Little Caesar's two for one pizza deal, and the third is to replace all the Coke and Pepsi on store shelves with look-alike cola that tastes like crap. That will cause all American's to stop drinking soda altogether. It's not a consipiracy...it's a well thought out plan by the government. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:15 yes The Glendale police department are out wasting their time giving tickets to cyclists who are just out enjoying a peaceful bike ride while blowing through stop signs. What they should really be doing is something that will keep the streets safe for everyone. How about giving out moving violations to cyclists that really shouldn't be wearing spandex at all. $350 for the spandex muffin top. $500 for wearing the white spandex shorts. Thu, 28 Jun 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-06-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e01a5471-c93b-4206-9af8-28c8c25e15a0 506 Violation The Glendale police department are out wasting their time giving tickets to cyclists who are just out enjoying a peaceful bike ride while blowing through stop signs. What they should really be doing is something that will keep the streets safe for everyone. How about giving out moving violations to cyclists that really shouldn't be wearing spandex at all. $350 for the spandex muffin top. $500 for wearing the white spandex shorts. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:31 yes Some friends are just your party friends, others are your movie and dinner girlfriends, and still others are just your regular hanging out type of friends. Then there are those friends that you can really count on. Not just the ones that will be there if you need a shoulder to cry on, but instead the type of friends that will not only wipe your vagina, but those that will change a tampon for you. Not just any tampon...but an honest to goodness O.B. without the applicator. Mon, 25 Jun 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-06-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ddfe585e-6215-4b4a-a989-b89db5380447 505 Saint Roxanne Some friends are just your party friends, others are your movie and dinner girlfriends, and still others are just your regular hanging out type of friends. Then there are those friends that you can really count on. Not just the ones that will be there if you need a shoulder to cry on, but instead the type of friends that will not only wipe your vagina, but those that will change a tampon for you. Not just any tampon...but an honest to goodness O.B. without the applicator. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:11 yes Just because the neighbor pretends to be a straight lady living quietly with her husband next door, doesn't mean she doesn't secretly fantasize about going down on your wife. Maybe she lays in bed at night creating elaborate fantasies about how she passive aggressively allows her dog to crap on your lawn so that you'll come out of the house all hot and bothered to yell at her. She'll try to make it up to you by inviting you over to her house for a massage and some girl talk...all before she pulls a John Travolta on you. Thu, 14 Jun 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-06-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7b9c6fb9-09bc-4360-85aa-e969752298bf 504 Whodunnit Just because the neighbor pretends to be a straight lady living quietly with her husband next door, doesn't mean she doesn't secretly fantasize about going down on your wife. Maybe she lays in bed at night creating elaborate fantasies about how she passive aggressively allows her dog to crap on your lawn so that you'll come out of the house all hot and bothered to yell at her. She'll try to make it up to you by inviting you over to her house for a massage and some girl talk...all before she pulls a John Travolta on you. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:45 yes It's great to be a guy. Whenever you need a little pleasure you can just go to the local public restroom, find a glory hole and stick it right in. Never mind that you don't know who is on the other end, if they have tongue herpes, no teeth, a sharp object or other incurable diseases. You always run the risk of leaving without a body part, but at the end of the day...it's all worth it. Sun, 10 Jun 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-06-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ac0c69c2-c291-4944-bc4b-105da449a5db 503 Glory Hole It's great to be a guy. Whenever you need a little pleasure you can just go to the local public restroom, find a glory hole and stick it right in. Never mind that you don't know who is on the other end, if they have tongue herpes, no teeth, a sharp object or other incurable diseases. You always run the risk of leaving without a body part, but at the end of the day...it's all worth it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:10 yes These days there are so many ways to pick up women. You can browse the personal ads, go on match.com or even do it the old fashioned way by picking up some drunk chick at a bar. Why would you even think about tossing some chicken bones down on the ground in front of some lady walking her dog just so you can save her dog and be her hero by giving her dog mouth to snout resuscitation? It just seems like so much more work than is really necessary. Wed, 6 Jun 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-06-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ad7573cf-5105-4ef6-a2c8-a836e0a8abdb 502 Mouth to Snout These days there are so many ways to pick up women. You can browse the personal ads, go on match.com or even do it the old fashioned way by picking up some drunk chick at a bar. Why would you even think about tossing some chicken bones down on the ground in front of some lady walking her dog just so you can save her dog and be her hero by giving her dog mouth to snout resuscitation? It just seems like so much more work than is really necessary. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:27 yes Welcome to America, where fat is now the new thin. We'll take our burgers with a triple stack of meat, ten slices of cheese and fourteen pieces of bacon. If it doesn't have saturated fat pouring out of every crevice, why would we eat it? We don't care if every meal we go out to eat has enough calories to live off for the next two weeks...as long as a hot girl comes out in really tiny shorts and big boobs to serve it to us. Sun, 3 Jun 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-06-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 81e466d8-a670-4cd6-8441-428c08ad2ac4 501 Triple Bypass Welcome to America, where fat is now the new thin. We'll take our burgers with a triple stack of meat, ten slices of cheese and fourteen pieces of bacon. If it doesn't have saturated fat pouring out of every crevice, why would we eat it? We don't care if every meal we go out to eat has enough calories to live off for the next two weeks...as long as a hot girl comes out in really tiny shorts and big boobs to serve it to us. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:38 yes For the first time in history an American president comes out in support of Gay marriage publicly. More proof that the Aztecs might have been right after all...the world might really just end on December 21st of 2012. Only one thing to do now...party like it's 1999. Game on. Wed, 30 May 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-05-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4ad6d3ed-d6b0-4b68-9e1b-763e2773a235 500 Historic Moments For the first time in history an American president comes out in support of Gay marriage publicly. More proof that the Aztecs might have been right after all...the world might really just end on December 21st of 2012. Only one thing to do now...party like it's 1999. Game on. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:37 yes Unfortunately for many actresses, the retirement age for porn stars tends to be very young. The good news is that the airline industry is happy to do their part in giving these talented young ladies a chance for another career. To find out if your flight attendant is a video porn star or just a telephone sex operator, all you need to do is to look at her boobs. If her boobs are big - TV...if they're small - phone sex operator. Mon, 28 May 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-05-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1eb46afc-9058-4a6e-9241-afa3c8a81929 499 Friendlier Skies Unfortunately for many actresses, the retirement age for porn stars tends to be very young. The good news is that the airline industry is happy to do their part in giving these talented young ladies a chance for another career. To find out if your flight attendant is a video porn star or just a telephone sex operator, all you need to do is to look at her boobs. If her boobs are big - TV...if they're small - phone sex operator. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:29 yes There are really only two ways that a tampon can end up on the sidewalk. One is that some dirty pig decided she needed to change her tampon right now and she did it in her car and flung it out the window. The other is that the Gay men that just moved into the neighborhood wanted to sabotage the "dirty dykes" that live next door so that they would have to move away in shame. Then they would be able to have their Gay male friends move into the neighborhood instead of the Dykes. Sun, 13 May 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-05-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e8860808-84dc-4446-84ee-12bcb3e82cec 498 Double D There are really only two ways that a tampon can end up on the sidewalk. One is that some dirty pig decided she needed to change her tampon right now and she did it in her car and flung it out the window. The other is that the Gay men that just moved into the neighborhood wanted to sabotage the "dirty dykes" that live next door so that they would have to move away in shame. Then they would be able to have their Gay male friends move into the neighborhood instead of the Dykes. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:01 yes It's been a long time since Crayola packed a Burnt Umber crayon inside one of their boxes. In fact, it's been so long that some people have gotten quite nostalgic about this beautiful shade of crayon and have decided to do something about it personally. One thoughtful New Jersey mom decided to take herself beyond a nice pleasing bronze color and go all the way to burnt umber without passing "go". She liked it so much that she also decided to take her red-headed 5-year old daughter with her. Model mom award of 2012 goes to.... Wed, 9 May 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-05-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 00b1a8cd-ddc2-41b1-a1ac-ed53c6f835bf 497 Tanorexic It's been a long time since Crayola packed a Burnt Umber crayon inside one of their boxes. In fact, it's been so long that some people have gotten quite nostalgic about this beautiful shade of crayon and have decided to do something about it personally. One thoughtful New Jersey mom decided to take herself beyond a nice pleasing bronze color and go all the way to burnt umber without passing "go". She liked it so much that she also decided to take her red-headed 5-year old daughter with her. Model mom award of 2012 goes to... 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:08 yes On a scale of painful things, first there are menstrual cramps. Cramps can cause a great deal of discomfort all the way to outright screaming pain. Then there's childbirth. Natural childbirth can really hurt....a lot. Then there's the kind of pain that a scale hasn't been developed for yet. Childbirth through a penis really f*cking hurts. Sun, 6 May 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-05-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c365c8f2-9dc6-47d3-978e-ce3580892a2b 496 Stoned On a scale of painful things, first there are menstrual cramps. Cramps can cause a great deal of discomfort all the way to outright screaming pain. Then there's childbirth. Natural childbirth can really hurt....a lot. Then there's the kind of pain that a scale hasn't been developed for yet. Childbirth through a penis really f*cking hurts. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 21:58 yes Heading up to the lake for a vacation can be a very rejuvenating experience. Lots of fresh air, beautiful wooded forests and the opportunity to become one with nature. That's all fine and well until you realize the woods are jam-packed with coyotes, bears and other vermin set to carry off your pets for lunch. Next time it might be more relaxing to just stay in the city with the muggers, the dope fiends and the crazed lunatics. Wed, 25 Apr 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-04-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f6af42ad-9abb-4268-9eae-7c563f765e4e 495 Coyote Ugly Heading up to the lake for a vacation can be a very rejuvenating experience. Lots of fresh air, beautiful wooded forests and the opportunity to become one with nature. That's all fine and well until you realize the woods are jam-packed with coyotes, bears and other vermin set to carry off your pets for lunch. Next time it might be more relaxing to just stay in the city with the muggers, the dope fiends and the crazed lunatics. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:29 yes As it turns out...the extremist right-wing was correct after all. First we allow Gay marriage, which then lead to all other kinds of abhorrent and deviant behavior. Now the Lesbians are obsessed with dogs' buttholes. They follow dogs around and stare at their butts, they study how enlarged the sphincter is at any given time, and even how often the dog takes a crap. Clearly, they've taken this way too far and now the situation is completely out of control. Sun, 22 Apr 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-04-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5b59ddbb-d6f3-499e-97c1-a798c1634395 494 Dogaphile As it turns out...the extremist right-wing was correct after all. First we allow Gay marriage, which then lead to all other kinds of abhorrent and deviant behavior. Now the Lesbians are obsessed with dogs' buttholes. They follow dogs around and stare at their butts, they study how enlarged the sphincter is at any given time, and even how often the dog takes a crap. Clearly, they've taken this way too far and now the situation is completely out of control. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:59 yes For the straight ladies...you can keep the baseball hats with the ponytail through the back, you can keep the comfy boxer shorts to kick around in and look sexy, and you can keep pretending to enjoy kissing Lesbians. For the straight men...you can keep the goatees, you can keep the Doc Marten's, and you can keep shaving your nutsack. When it comes to the rainbows, however...that's when we have to put our foot down. Just pick a freaking color. You can't have them all. Thu, 12 Apr 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-04-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 96921f91-22dc-47f1-99fb-8bb6fdd2d4b6 493 Taking Our Sh#t Back For the straight ladies...you can keep the baseball hats with the ponytail through the back, you can keep the comfy boxer shorts to kick around in and look sexy, and you can keep pretending to enjoy kissing Lesbians. For the straight men...you can keep the goatees, you can keep the Doc Marten's, and you can keep shaving your nutsack. When it comes to the rainbows, however...that's when we have to put our foot down. Just pick a freaking color. You can't have them all. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:33 yes Getting a piece of dessert really shouldn't be so hard to do. If you have to run a marathon, knock people over and hunt it down like prey in a forest, you really are burning too many calories just to eat a piece of cake. After all, dessert really should put on more pounds than you take off trying to enjoy it. Mon, 9 Apr 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-04-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 21383545-e483-4c37-bf2d-348d9d04693c 492 Dessert Triathlon Getting a piece of dessert really shouldn't be so hard to do. If you have to run a marathon, knock people over and hunt it down like prey in a forest, you really are burning too many calories just to eat a piece of cake. After all, dessert really should put on more pounds than you take off trying to enjoy it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:44 yes It used to be that we lived in a nice quiet neighborhood, but now I realize that we actually live in a barnyard. The hens in the neighborhood walk around all day cackling and gossiping about everyone else's business in the neighborhood. Then there's the Lesbian pigs that live in the corner house where all the grass is dead and they think that dog poop makes good fertilizer to leave all over the lawn. Moo. Wed, 4 Apr 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-04-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8bce9bfd-7308-4d2e-a166-b613d49767e2 491 Inner Gay Male It used to be that we lived in a nice quiet neighborhood, but now I realize that we actually live in a barnyard. The hens in the neighborhood walk around all day cackling and gossiping about everyone else's business in the neighborhood. Then there's the Lesbian pigs that live in the corner house where all the grass is dead and they think that dog poop makes good fertilizer to leave all over the lawn. Moo. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:03 yes A message to Gill and Jane: I am extending a heartfelt apology for the evening you spent with Roxanne. I apologize for her unbridled vulgarity, her lack of compassion for other human beings, her outright sense of entitlement, and for embarrassing the United States of America and confirming every ugly American stereotype in existence. We sincerely hope that this doesn't affect the relationship between the United States and the wonderful and warm country of the UK. Sun, 1 Apr 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-04-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b9414670-7c7b-11e1-b0c4-0800200c9a66 490 Coming to America A message to Gill and Jane: I am extending a heartfelt apology for the evening you spent with Roxanne. I apologize for her unbridled vulgarity, her lack of compassion for other human beings, her outright sense of entitlement, and for embarrassing the United States of America and confirming every ugly American stereotype in existence. We sincerely hope that this doesn't affect the relationship between the United States and the wonderful and warm country of the UK. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 20:01 yes Sometimes you just have to do whatever it takes to to get something you really want. Once you've set you sights on the goal, you just have to go for it. It doesn't matter if you have to pretend to like Axe Body Spray, you have to give not one, but two men boners, and you have to speak four languages. It's all worth it if you achieve your dream in the end. Sun, 25 Mar 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-03-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e15065a2-5980-4706-a15e-c7eac408ccb0 489 High Speed Pursuit Sometimes you just have to do whatever it takes to to get something you really want. Once you've set you sights on the goal, you just have to go for it. It doesn't matter if you have to pretend to like Axe Body Spray, you have to give not one, but two men boners, and you have to speak four languages. It's all worth it if you achieve your dream in the end. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:11 yes It's a well know fact that Lesbians have to change out the carpeting in their homes twice as frequently as Gay men. All that carpet munching really takes a toll on things. The only thing that's changed is that the Lesbians just don't buy their carpeting at Home Depot anymore. Time to sell your stock. Wed, 21 Mar 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-03-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c3b1f1c3-b612-40bc-a11d-008fb73f8f1b 488 Carpet Munchers It's a well know fact that Lesbians have to change out the carpeting in their homes twice as frequently as Gay men. All that carpet munching really takes a toll on things. The only thing that's changed is that the Lesbians just don't buy their carpeting at Home Depot anymore. Time to sell your stock. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 18:04 yes Lez by honest...our pets bring an enormous amount of joy and happiness to our lives every day. We wouldn't be the people we are today without them. They not only enrich our lives, but they also enrich our vocabulary. Tonight for dinner we're having a big bowl of Bordatella with a side of Rabies. For dessert it's two scoops of Parvo with a Giardia sauce drizzled on top. Sun, 18 Mar 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-03-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 95b9998e-9cd9-4ca0-b0ce-e7823b1ffca1 487 Lez Be Honest Lez by honest...our pets bring an enormous amount of joy and happiness to our lives every day. We wouldn't be the people we are today without them. They not only enrich our lives, but they also enrich our vocabulary. Tonight for dinner we're having a big bowl of Bordatella with a side of Rabies. For dessert it's two scoops of Parvo with a Giardia sauce drizzled on top. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:22 yes Lesbian fishing attire: Baseball hat - check. Thermal base layer under your matching t-shirt - check. Hooded sweatshirt to layer on top - check. Sporty, wraparound sunglasses - check. Stylish waterproof boots - check. Faded pair of comfortable blue jeans - check. Fishing pole with a pink wrapped grip and a matching pink reel - nope. That belongs to the straight chick on the boat. Wed, 14 Mar 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-03-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7779253f-3e6c-4ec1-975a-2f641a0c8113 486 Sixty Seconds Lesbian fishing attire: Baseball hat - check. Thermal base layer under your matching t-shirt - check. Hooded sweatshirt to layer on top - check. Sporty, wraparound sunglasses - check. Stylish waterproof boots - check. Faded pair of comfortable blue jeans - check. Fishing pole with a pink wrapped grip and a matching pink reel - nope. That belongs to the straight chick on the boat. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 18:25 yes Being a cougar is all fun and games until one day you wake up and realize that the 20 year difference between you and your partner is not so cute anymore now that you're 40. She definitely looked hot when you were 25 and she was 45. Now that you're 45 you finally wake up one day and are horrified to think....how did grandma all of a sudden get into bed with you? Sun, 11 Mar 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-03-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 308ec60d-cbc0-4e63-87fa-949d85e327d9 485 Teacher Appreciation Being a cougar is all fun and games until one day you wake up and realize that the 20 year difference between you and your partner is not so cute anymore now that you're 40. She definitely looked hot when you were 25 and she was 45. Now that you're 45 you finally wake up one day and are horrified to think....how did grandma all of a sudden get into bed with you? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:19 yes Nothing spells H.O.T. like a smooth, dreamy waterbed from the 1970's, especially if it has automatic heat controls. Then you think about your parents banging away in their new sleep numbers automatically adjustable bed...and suddenly...it just doesn't seem as hot and sexy anymore. Wed, 29 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f9eb01eb-96e2-49a4-b9d2-04acbaf02b75 484 Sweating Lips Nothing spells H.O.T. like a smooth, dreamy waterbed from the 1970's, especially if it has automatic heat controls. Then you think about your parents banging away in their new sleep numbers automatically adjustable bed...and suddenly...it just doesn't seem as hot and sexy anymore. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:55 yes It doesn't really matter if you did pick up the individually plastic wrapped roses at the local 7-11 and arranged them thoughtfully in a bouquet for your lady for Valentine's Day. Let her just believe that you could not stop thinking about how wonderful she is all day long and that you just wanted to sweep her off her feet and surprise her with the most magnificent bouquet of flowers ever. Why destroy the fantasy by admitting that you simply picked them up like a supermarket rag at the checkout counter on your way out of the store. Sun, 26 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5fc481dd-b98b-4e74-8f61-e59539b9fad6 483 Impulse Buy It doesn't really matter if you did pick up the individually plastic wrapped roses at the local 7-11 and arranged them thoughtfully in a bouquet for your lady for Valentine's Day. Let her just believe that you could not stop thinking about how wonderful she is all day long and that you just wanted to sweep her off her feet and surprise her with the most magnificent bouquet of flowers ever. Why destroy the fantasy by admitting that you simply picked them up like a supermarket rag at the checkout counter on your way out of the store. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:16 yes Next time you get one of those scam emails where you've won the lottery from some far off country you've never visited, or you have a long lost relative that left you millions of dollars in currency that you've never heard of before, think about doing the world a public service. Send an email back, without your bank account number of course, and keep them engaged in an endless series of correspondence until they simply give up. This way you can keep them busy and hopefully prevent one more gullible person in the world from giving up their entire life savings. Wed, 22 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b5e70ae3-9550-4725-8c85-519b4fa31c7e 482 Baby Smith Next time you get one of those scam emails where you've won the lottery from some far off country you've never visited, or you have a long lost relative that left you millions of dollars in currency that you've never heard of before, think about doing the world a public service. Send an email back, without your bank account number of course, and keep them engaged in an endless series of correspondence until they simply give up. This way you can keep them busy and hopefully prevent one more gullible person in the world from giving up their entire life savings. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:50 yes There's nothing wrong with having a little lasering done to clean up some straggler hairs that run down your leg and pop out when you're wearing that sexy bikini. Maybe you even want to clean up that treasure trail a bit before you hit the surf. Just make sure you use an experienced laser technician so that you don't have an industrial accident where the laser hits a lip by mistake. That could be a life-changing incident that happens in less than one second. Sun, 19 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e5179d94-f0fa-47f7-be7c-2985c8fcf2df 481 Numb and Numb-er There's nothing wrong with having a little lasering done to clean up some straggler hairs that run down your leg and pop out when you're wearing that sexy bikini. Maybe you even want to clean up that treasure trail a bit before you hit the surf. Just make sure you use an experienced laser technician so that you don't have an industrial accident where the laser hits a lip by mistake. That could be a life-changing incident that happens in less than one second. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:49 yes Countries are at war with each other, people are dying for no good reason, 50% of Americans are now obese, drug use is spiralling out of control, the worst recession this country has had since the Great Depression.... Doesn't God have enough to worry about without having to listen to you pray about making a touchdown? Just let God take a day off and enjoy the Super Bowl like everyone else. Wed, 15 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9f58ab37-b301-4965-b202-0dfce4014a73 480 Super Dyke Bowl Countries are at war with each other, people are dying for no good reason, 50% of Americans are now obese, drug use is spiralling out of control, the worst recession this country has had since the Great Depression.... Doesn't God have enough to worry about without having to listen to you pray about making a touchdown? Just let God take a day off and enjoy the Super Bowl like everyone else. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:54 yes Stupid should hurt. Seriously. Perhaps then people would think twice about being morons. Or, maybe Tylenol stock would simply go through the roof as people all over America stockpile as many bottles as they can. Maybe you want to use that insider tip to become the world's next millionaire. Buy low...sell high. Sun, 12 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 95fc6837-dccf-45e4-a4fc-c4475419f988 479 Miss Pissit Stupid should hurt. Seriously. Perhaps then people would think twice about being morons. Or, maybe Tylenol stock would simply go through the roof as people all over America stockpile as many bottles as they can. Maybe you want to use that insider tip to become the world's next millionaire. Buy low...sell high. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:22 yes Becoming a vegan used to seem like so much work. Every meal has to be planned out down to the last detail, you have to shop for groceries on a more regular basis, you have to find exotic recipes to keep meals interesting and you have to interrogate every restaurant server about each dish on the menu just to make sure you can eat it. Nobody wanted to invite you over for dinner because you were such a pain in the ass. Now that we know about meat glue and pink slime...vegan doesn't sound like nearly as much trouble as it used to. Wed, 8 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast fbc08b52-287f-44dc-81be-fc690dca96e9 478 Meat Glue Becoming a vegan used to seem like so much work. Every meal has to be planned out down to the last detail, you have to shop for groceries on a more regular basis, you have to find exotic recipes to keep meals interesting and you have to interrogate every restaurant server about each dish on the menu just to make sure you can eat it. Nobody wanted to invite you over for dinner because you were such a pain in the ass. Now that we know about meat glue and pink slime...vegan doesn't sound like nearly as much trouble as it used to. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:04 yes The neighborhood watch is a beautiful thing. Everybody knows about everybody's business, who's beating their wife, where the Lesbians in the neighborhood live, and whose wife is out slutting around. When it comes to stopping real crimes in the neighborhood, however, everyone always knows all the details only after the fact. Once the grow house has run through their series of plantings, supplied all the local dealers multiple times and then moves out...that's when suddenly everyone knows all about it. Sun, 5 Feb 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-02-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1ba747dc-afc2-47f2-bac7-3a19616f637e 477 Grow House The neighborhood watch is a beautiful thing. Everybody knows about everybody's business, who's beating their wife, where the Lesbians in the neighborhood live, and whose wife is out slutting around. When it comes to stopping real crimes in the neighborhood, however, everyone always knows all the details only after the fact. Once the grow house has run through their series of plantings, supplied all the local dealers multiple times and then moves out...that's when suddenly everyone knows all about it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:29 yes Thanks to the advent of technology, driving in the car with children for hours on a long trip is a lost art. Gone are the days when the kids would sit in the back seat taunting each other incessantly, poking each other mercilessly and drooling on your sister as Dad threatened to pull the car over on the side of the road. Now the kids simply put on their headphones, turn on the iPod and watch a movie on the DVD player. Where did all the fun go? Slug Bug. Sun, 22 Jan 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-01-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast fa411e2c-2bc0-4ef5-b881-85fd6402bdf6 476 Bieber Fever Thanks to the advent of technology, driving in the car with children for hours on a long trip is a lost art. Gone are the days when the kids would sit in the back seat taunting each other incessantly, poking each other mercilessly and drooling on your sister as Dad threatened to pull the car over on the side of the road. Now the kids simply put on their headphones, turn on the iPod and watch a movie on the DVD player. Where did all the fun go? Slug Bug. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:47 yes You're eco-sensitive about almost everything in your life. You drink out of a reusable plastic bottle, you recycle everything you can and you even have a composting bin in the backyard. Why not take it one step further and just not wear any underwear. That way you can reduce the amount of laundry you have to do and conserve water at the same time. Lesbians will still find you just as sexy as if you were wearing only a thong. Wed, 18 Jan 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-01-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast d3c91e57-284a-4476-9cc8-7943256e38bd 475 Native Lesbo You're eco-sensitive about almost everything in your life. You drink out of a reusable plastic bottle, you recycle everything you can and you even have a composting bin in the backyard. Why not take it one step further and just not wear any underwear. That way you can reduce the amount of laundry you have to do and conserve water at the same time. Lesbians will still find you just as sexy as if you were wearing only a thong. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:43 yes Going to the gynecologist is a clinical experience. There is nothing sexual about it in any way. Just because the doctor lubes you up, hunts around obsessively for your G-spot and leaves you all wet and messy on the table by yourself after they're done. Of course, that doesn't mean that you and your lady can't play "gynecologist" in the privacy of your own home. Especially if she's the Dildo Whisperer. Sun, 15 Jan 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-01-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 45088b21-7f5a-4254-afe0-dce8216162d2 474 Knuckles Deep Going to the gynecologist is a clinical experience. There is nothing sexual about it in any way. Just because the doctor lubes you up, hunts around obsessively for your G-spot and leaves you all wet and messy on the table by yourself after they're done. Of course, that doesn't mean that you and your lady can't play "gynecologist" in the privacy of your own home. Especially if she's the Dildo Whisperer. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 18:07 yes Monogamy is not a bad thing...unless you're having a long-term monogamous relationship with yourself. We're not just talking about a personal time-out, that you're just in between relationships, or even if you're waiting for the right time. It's when you're approaching 50 and have never had sex with anyone but yourself that it's time for a tall bottle of rum and $150. Don't forget the tip. Wed, 4 Jan 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-01-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1f4c27e3-fe06-49f1-a476-c29c64620ec0 473 Nailed It Monogamy is not a bad thing...unless you're having a long-term monogamous relationship with yourself. We're not just talking about a personal time-out, that you're just in between relationships, or even if you're waiting for the right time. It's when you're approaching 50 and have never had sex with anyone but yourself that it's time for a tall bottle of rum and $150. Don't forget the tip. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:26 yes Sooner or later everyone steps in it. Try as we might to maintain our composure in every situation and to always do the right thing, it's going to be unavoidable at some point. May as well get that apology together right now so that you can sound sincere when you really need it. Take a moment now to record your apology in advance, loop it so that it plays over and over again, and then pull it out when you really need to make an apology and you just don't think you can sound sincere. You'll thank us later. Sun, 1 Jan 2012 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2012-01-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3a0369d8-d6e1-40d8-a652-ad3952e61806 472 Disingenuous Sooner or later everyone steps in it. Try as we might to maintain our composure in every situation and to always do the right thing, it's going to be unavoidable at some point. May as well get that apology together right now so that you can sound sincere when you really need it. Take a moment now to record your apology in advance, loop it so that it plays over and over again, and then pull it out when you really need to make an apology and you just don't think you can sound sincere. You'll thank us later. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:42 yes Some people eat mushrooms, some people study mushrooms, some people grow mushrooms, and others simply manage by the mushroom principle -- keep 'em in the dark and feed 'em crap. Wed, 28 Dec 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-12-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c8302ec7-2255-43d8-a482-f38518f3a4bf 471 Mycology Some people eat mushrooms, some people study mushrooms, some people grow mushrooms, and others simply manage by the mushroom principle -- keep 'em in the dark and feed 'em crap. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:36 yes Families that shoplift together stay together, even if it's only staying in jail together. So, next time you're out shoplifting, grab the baby, pick up grandma from the home and get all your cousins to join you. Make sure you start in the meat aisle, grab the most expensive cuts of meat you can find, and stick it all in the baby's diapers. Don't forget to pick up a bottle of Cristal on your way out the door. Happy Holidays. Wed, 21 Dec 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-12-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 482e7319-85c7-40ab-aee2-7ef014c9ed86 470 Shoplifting 101 Families that shoplift together stay together, even if it's only staying in jail together. So, next time you're out shoplifting, grab the baby, pick up grandma from the home and get all your cousins to join you. Make sure you start in the meat aisle, grab the most expensive cuts of meat you can find, and stick it all in the baby's diapers. Don't forget to pick up a bottle of Cristal on your way out the door. Happy Holidays. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:21 yes The average woman has a period 520 times in her lifetime. That assumes 13 cycles per year at 28 days per cycle, and bleeding from ages 12 to 52. If the average woman uses 25 tampons per cycle, that works out to about $8 per cycle, for a total cost of $4,200. Add in the cost of panties that had to be tossed out because of an accident or two for another $1,000. Plus, another $1,200 for Midol. Now we have something practical to rally around in the upcoming election season - a tax break for having to menstruate. Sun, 18 Dec 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-12-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 66f2580f-230a-4429-9b80-b8ce7c064447 469 Bleed to Win The average woman has a period 520 times in her lifetime. That assumes 13 cycles per year at 28 days per cycle, and bleeding from ages 12 to 52. If the average woman uses 25 tampons per cycle, that works out to about $8 per cycle, for a total cost of $4,200. Add in the cost of panties that had to be tossed out because of an accident or two for another $1,000. Plus, another $1,200 for Midol. Now we have something practical to rally around in the upcoming election season - a tax break for having to menstruate. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:54 yes Being a responsible dog owner is a big commitment. You have to make sure you feed your pets every day, give them fresh water to drink and a nice cozy place to sleep. You have to keep up on shots and regular vet visits and give your pet plenty of exercise for a nice, fulfilling life. Most importantly, if someone else's dog takes a crap on your front lawn, you have to pick it up and fling it into their yard to help teach them how to become a responsible pet owner, too. Wed, 14 Dec 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-12-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 86fc8d0f-ccda-44ed-9266-b9fcb41cf1e3 468 Responsible Dog Owners Being a responsible dog owner is a big commitment. You have to make sure you feed your pets every day, give them fresh water to drink and a nice cozy place to sleep. You have to keep up on shots and regular vet visits and give your pet plenty of exercise for a nice, fulfilling life. Most importantly, if someone else's dog takes a crap on your front lawn, you have to pick it up and fling it into their yard to help teach them how to become a responsible pet owner, too. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:26 yes Moving beyond hot dogs and french fries can be a scary thing. It takes a big person to get out of their food comfort zone and to try new things. Once you do, however, you realize that the world has a lot of interesting and new foods to offer. You'll also come to realize that there really is a reason people call Lesbian sex, "bumping clams".The first time you open up a steamed clam...you finally understand that it does look kind of like a vagina. Sun, 11 Dec 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-12-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0912a8ac-732d-4107-8212-2ca381520f93 467 Food Adventures Moving beyond hot dogs and french fries can be a scary thing. It takes a big person to get out of their food comfort zone and to try new things. Once you do, however, you realize that the world has a lot of interesting and new foods to offer. You'll also come to realize that there really is a reason people call Lesbian sex, "bumping clams".The first time you open up a steamed clam...you finally understand that it does look kind of like a vagina. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:40 yes There are few things more disturbing than thinking about sweaty balls...except perhaps thinking about having sweaty lips. Now that the holidays are upon us, do a friend a solid and find some Clean Balls or Lip Clean. Wrap it up into a sexy little package and make it your special secret gift between you and the one you love this holiday season. The world will be a better place. Mon, 5 Dec 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-12-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f5fe111d-dfa2-4796-9c43-92d3c38a4c80 466 Lip Room There are few things more disturbing than thinking about sweaty balls...except perhaps thinking about having sweaty lips. Now that the holidays are upon us, do a friend a solid and find some Clean Balls or Lip Clean. Wrap it up into a sexy little package and make it your special secret gift between you and the one you love this holiday season. The world will be a better place. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:55 yes It's that wonderful time of the year! Time to go shopping with all the crowds at your favorite stores to pick up a butt load of gifts for everyone on your list. Pack up your kids, the taser, the pepper spray, and maybe a knife just for good measure. Head over to Wal-Mart so that you're there as soon as the doors open at midnight. Then just unload a huge cloud of pepper spray across the crowd blocking your way, pick up that X-Box and head to the cash register. After all that hard work, you definitely don't want to get picked up for shoplifting. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-11-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c06eb01a-2a3b-4f98-8a1d-d26147087f1b 465 Black Friday It's that wonderful time of the year! Time to go shopping with all the crowds at your favorite stores to pick up a butt load of gifts for everyone on your list. Pack up your kids, the taser, the pepper spray, and maybe a knife just for good measure. Head over to Wal-Mart so that you're there as soon as the doors open at midnight. Then just unload a huge cloud of pepper spray across the crowd blocking your way, pick up that X-Box and head to the cash register. After all that hard work, you definitely don't want to get picked up for shoplifting. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:12 yes Your first time with a boy or a girl should be a special moment and it shouldn't be something you rush into or take for granted. You'll want to wait until you're in love and the moment is right for both of you. You'll know when the moment is right, even if the "moment" lasts only 15 seconds...or it feels like having a watermelon between your legs. Don't worry...it gets better. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-11-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a1bb95aa-c327-41b3-a5b6-c3153e07020f 464 Feels Like the First Time Your first time with a boy or a girl should be a special moment and it shouldn't be something you rush into or take for granted. You'll want to wait until you're in love and the moment is right for both of you. You'll know when the moment is right, even if the "moment" lasts only 15 seconds...or it feels like having a watermelon between your legs. Don't worry...it gets better. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:07 yes In this modern day and age it's almost unbelievable to imagine that people could have actually cooked a meal before the advent of microwave ovens. It's hard to even fathom that people used to really cook on a stove and wait patiently for water to boil. It's a good thing there are still drive thru's or else we'd all die of starvation. Wed, 16 Nov 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-11-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 6c2bcf80-6dcf-4160-abdc-86b90b62e50f 463 Caveman Cooking In this modern day and age it's almost unbelievable to imagine that people could have actually cooked a meal before the advent of microwave ovens. It's hard to even fathom that people used to really cook on a stove and wait patiently for water to boil. It's a good thing there are still drive thru's or else we'd all die of starvation. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:16 yes It's important for every Lesbian to have a set of basic standards for dating women. The standards don't have to be high, they just have to meet some minimum basic requirements. She can be a "three" in the looks department as long as she can rock your socks off in between the sheets. But, if she has the personality of a naked mole rat and she stinks like Limburger in bed, it really doesn't matter if she has the only piece of software you need in the universe to finish your term paper. The Ho has got to Go. Sun, 13 Nov 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-11-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 37a08a9c-3746-4904-beeb-c0b39c32582d 462 My Name is Ho It's important for every Lesbian to have a set of basic standards for dating women. The standards don't have to be high, they just have to meet some minimum basic requirements. She can be a "three" in the looks department as long as she can rock your socks off in between the sheets. But, if she has the personality of a naked mole rat and she stinks like Limburger in bed, it really doesn't matter if she has the only piece of software you need in the universe to finish your term paper. The Ho has got to Go. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:31 yes The locker room doesn't have to be a place of fear and trepidation about taking your clothes off around other girls. It doesn't have to be a place that smells like sweaty socks and dirty underwear. And, it certainly doesn't have to be the place of Roxanne's depraved fantasies about hot steamy sex. See what it's all about by visiting the Locker Room Girls at lockerroomgirls.blogspot.com. Wed, 9 Nov 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-11-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0d4197ab-3e73-4b6d-856b-a67a0e1f8f1b 461 Locker Room Girls The locker room doesn't have to be a place of fear and trepidation about taking your clothes off around other girls. It doesn't have to be a place that smells like sweaty socks and dirty underwear. And, it certainly doesn't have to be the place of Roxanne's depraved fantasies about hot steamy sex. See what it's all about by visiting the Locker Room Girls at lockerroomgirls.blogspot.com. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:17 yes It's not just straight people that have lingering questions they want to ask Lesbians. Gay men are also sometimes curious about the things Lesbians say and do. At least they know enough to call the Lesbians on moving day. That way they know they'll have a truck and some big strong Dykes to help move all that heavy antique and designer furniture. Sun, 6 Nov 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-11-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ddc22075-edf0-4bae-96b0-ffa976d99a2e 460 Token Lesbians It's not just straight people that have lingering questions they want to ask Lesbians. Gay men are also sometimes curious about the things Lesbians say and do. At least they know enough to call the Lesbians on moving day. That way they know they'll have a truck and some big strong Dykes to help move all that heavy antique and designer furniture. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:28 yes Masturbation is a natural thing to do. Most people find it to be a pleasurable activity on their own or even with a partner. Sometimes you just want to rub one out to relieve a little stress or to fall asleep. It's even possible that your dog likes to rub one out once in a while. There's no reason to be disturbed if you see the dog rubbing one out. Just tell Rover to get off the couch when he does it, because nobody likes to sit in the wet spot. Sun, 30 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e375bc9d-f04c-4746-8abe-f5f405437329 459 Dog Jerk Masturbation is a natural thing to do. Most people find it to be a pleasurable activity on their own or even with a partner. Sometimes you just want to rub one out to relieve a little stress or to fall asleep. It's even possible that your dog likes to rub one out once in a while. There's no reason to be disturbed if you see the dog rubbing one out. Just tell Rover to get off the couch when he does it, because nobody likes to sit in the wet spot. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:07 yes When most Lesbians think of the "Big D" they start thinking about the Big Dyke that lives next door. What they should really be thinking about are the 10 signs that they might be headed for a breakup or divorce. One of the most telling signs for Lesbians that a relationship is on the rocks is when your partner suddenly starts wearing matching bras and panties. We're not talking about the six pairs of white ones you picked up for her at K-Mart on sale last week either. Thu, 27 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3fb53309-bfcd-42b5-ab14-05da58ca2434 458 The Big D When most Lesbians think of the "Big D" they start thinking about the Big Dyke that lives next door. What they should really be thinking about are the 10 signs that they might be headed for a breakup or divorce. One of the most telling signs for Lesbians that a relationship is on the rocks is when your partner suddenly starts wearing matching bras and panties. We're not talking about the six pairs of white ones you picked up for her at K-Mart on sale last week either. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:15 yes E-bay is the panacea for buying anything at all you can think of. It doesn't matter what it is...new or used...shipped from anywhere in the world, you can find it on E-bay. Next time you take the dogs on a walk at 5am and one of them gets hit by a reckless driver in the dark and the fog, you can find the murder chalk you need to draw an outline of the dead body on E-bay. Just search for it. Sun, 23 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast bac6f9be-a181-4747-82b4-4115e4891f8b 457 Power Walk E-bay is the panacea for buying anything at all you can think of. It doesn't matter what it is...new or used...shipped from anywhere in the world, you can find it on E-bay. Next time you take the dogs on a walk at 5am and one of them gets hit by a reckless driver in the dark and the fog, you can find the murder chalk you need to draw an outline of the dead body on E-bay. Just search for it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:02 yes Vegas Baby! Classless white people over-eating at buffets and chain smoking cigarettes while they dump quarters into slot machines. It's hard to believe that anyone would want to go...until you visit the pool at the Hard Rock and have to be taken away by ambulance from cardiac arrest due to all the hot chicks in bikinis at the pool. It's possible that I could be one of those white people... Wed, 19 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast caf50055-439a-4942-868b-62200cb3610a 456 Wheel of Homos Vegas Baby! Classless white people over-eating at buffets and chain smoking cigarettes while they dump quarters into slot machines. It's hard to believe that anyone would want to go...until you visit the pool at the Hard Rock and have to be taken away by ambulance from cardiac arrest due to all the hot chicks in bikinis at the pool. It's possible that I could be one of those white people... 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:41 yes Things can hardly be any spookier between Mitt Romney, Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann and the Tea Baggers until you realize it's almost Halloween. Of course, that's a good kind of scary. The kind where all you have a to be scared about is the creepy Lesbians that live on the corner, deck out their house for Halloween and give away full-sized candy bars not only to the kids, but their cute moms as well. Sun, 16 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 26da3b6f-6420-4a6e-bf37-623d814ecbf7 455 Spooky Times Things can hardly be any spookier between Mitt Romney, Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann and the Tea Baggers until you realize it's almost Halloween. Of course, that's a good kind of scary. The kind where all you have a to be scared about is the creepy Lesbians that live on the corner, deck out their house for Halloween and give away full-sized candy bars not only to the kids, but their cute moms as well. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:27 yes It's important for everyone on this planet to do their part to protect the environment. Stop drinking water out of plastic bottles and instead drink it out of paper boxes that require trees to be cut down. Put it in a container that's so large that you need to use a glass that then requires hot water that uses fossil fuels to heat up and then detergent that contains phosphates that leak in to our water supply. Let's get serious and do your part, people. Wed, 12 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 23b68d60-2c82-43d8-a24f-4854fa99958b 454 Buds and Boxes It's important for everyone on this planet to do their part to protect the environment. Stop drinking water out of plastic bottles and instead drink it out of paper boxes that require trees to be cut down. Put it in a container that's so large that you need to use a glass that then requires hot water that uses fossil fuels to heat up and then detergent that contains phosphates that leak in to our water supply. Let's get serious and do your part, people. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:35 yes It's not always so common to see older Gay people out and about, especially in the Lesbian community. That can be a bit confusing to the younger set because we keep wondering what happens to Gay people when they get older? Maybe they're all at some hip club, hanging out all night and meeting interesting new people. As long as the Lesbian dress code continues to include t-shirts, blue jeans and sneakers...we're in. Sun, 9 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 60688c58-b594-4269-b0b9-017f283c8352 453 Gay Day It's not always so common to see older Gay people out and about, especially in the Lesbian community. That can be a bit confusing to the younger set because we keep wondering what happens to Gay people when they get older? Maybe they're all at some hip club, hanging out all night and meeting interesting new people. As long as the Lesbian dress code continues to include t-shirts, blue jeans and sneakers...we're in. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:00 yes First dates are about getting to know another person. There's no commitment, no obligation and no life-changing decisions that need to be made. It's all about small talk, feeling each other out and figuring out if it's worth having a second date. If that first date turns into more than that, however, it's probably not a good idea to burst out laughing the first time you see his penis. Wed, 5 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a688eea2-9295-416b-9c83-d3bf720a9eff 452 First Date First dates are about getting to know another person. There's no commitment, no obligation and no life-changing decisions that need to be made. It's all about small talk, feeling each other out and figuring out if it's worth having a second date. If that first date turns into more than that, however, it's probably not a good idea to burst out laughing the first time you see his penis. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:59 yes Spring cleaning is not just for Spring time anymore. When that urge to declutter comes over you just start bagging up your crap and clean out those closets. Then have yourself a big ol' yard sale and make a little extra cash at the same time. You'll have that satisfied feeling of accomplishment...until it dawns on you that you've just participated in enabling all the hoarders in your neighborhood. Now they just moved all your trash over to their house. Sun, 2 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-10-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a094ee28-f5d4-4ffa-b0e8-5cb143ec9426 451 One Less Hoarder Spring cleaning is not just for Spring time anymore. When that urge to declutter comes over you just start bagging up your crap and clean out those closets. Then have yourself a big ol' yard sale and make a little extra cash at the same time. You'll have that satisfied feeling of accomplishment...until it dawns on you that you've just participated in enabling all the hoarders in your neighborhood. Now they just moved all your trash over to their house. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:45 yes With the country on the brink of a major depression, if everyone would just get out and blow their entire life savings on frivolous crap we would be able to turn the economy back around in no time. Times like this can be challenging and everyone might be feeling a bit of extra stress and tension, so why not take care of both problems at once? Go out and spend a ton of cash on a buttload of sex toys, porn and lube. That way you can release a little stress while helping the economy all at the same time. Tue, 27 Sep 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-09-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast af15726c-e1a2-4084-bbe1-5cf01a8f4527 450 Jumpstart the Economy With the country on the brink of a major depression, if everyone would just get out and blow their entire life savings on frivolous crap we would be able to turn the economy back around in no time. Times like this can be challenging and everyone might be feeling a bit of extra stress and tension, so why not take care of both problems at once? Go out and spend a ton of cash on a buttload of sex toys, porn and lube. That way you can release a little stress while helping the economy all at the same time. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 26:06 yes The Lesbian equivalent of "man cave": the largest room in the house complete with a pool table, a foosball table, skee-ball, a basketball hoop, a 72" wide screen TV for watching football, a beer cooler, 3 neon beer signs and pinup posters of naked women. Nothing could be more perfect...unless the Lesbian Cave came complete with a beer delivery three times a week. Mon, 19 Sep 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-09-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7b1aa18e-577c-4d1a-89a2-b60f1a9c193b 449 Mountain Straight Lady The Lesbian equivalent of "man cave": the largest room in the house complete with a pool table, a foosball table, skee-ball, a basketball hoop, a 72" wide screen TV for watching football, a beer cooler, 3 neon beer signs and pinup posters of naked women. Nothing could be more perfect...unless the Lesbian Cave came complete with a beer delivery three times a week. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 20:48 yes There's a reason why wedding seating arrangements are so important, and it's not about putting interesting, fun people together. It's more about separating people that can't stand to be around each other or people that will cause drama when they are together. You have to be sure to separate the groom's former ex, who is also his aunt's ex together at the same table with the ex's current husband and her girlfriend on the side. It gets complicated. Sun, 11 Sep 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-09-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7e30f71b-f264-4324-8805-622ab49ae839 448 Cuckoo There's a reason why wedding seating arrangements are so important, and it's not about putting interesting, fun people together. It's more about separating people that can't stand to be around each other or people that will cause drama when they are together. You have to be sure to separate the groom's former ex, who is also his aunt's ex together at the same table with the ex's current husband and her girlfriend on the side. It gets complicated. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:46 yes We have even more proof not only that people in LA don't cook at all, but also that Lesbians will actually come out of the house and travel for miles to go out for a classy meal at the travelling food trucks. Next time the roving food trucks show up in your neighborhood, cancel your subscription to Match.com becauseyou'll be sure to find a date at the food truck Dyke-A-Palooza. Don't look for the Gay men...they'll be dining at a real restaurant. Thu, 8 Sep 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-09-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b82a18f8-a4b4-45d2-bc07-18443ae6f202 447 Dyke-A-Palooza We have even more proof not only that people in LA don't cook at all, but also that Lesbians will actually come out of the house and travel for miles to go out for a classy meal at the travelling food trucks. Next time the roving food trucks show up in your neighborhood, cancel your subscription to Match.com becauseyou'll be sure to find a date at the food truck Dyke-A-Palooza. Don't look for the Gay men...they'll be dining at a real restaurant. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:14 yes Before one can come out as a Lesbian, there are certain basic skills that every Lesbian needs to know. The proper identification and use of duct tape is one of those such skills. No self-respecting Lesbian can come out of the closet without knowing the difference between electrical tape and duct tape, and also how to properly apply it to nipples while marching in Gay Pride parades. Removing duct tape from nipples without tearing off an areola is a much more advanced skill. Mon, 5 Sep 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-09-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ca79bbfc-f15d-467a-b0fc-e217065ed3f0 446 Betsy Ross Before one can come out as a Lesbian, there are certain basic skills that every Lesbian needs to know. The proper identification and use of duct tape is one of those such skills. No self-respecting Lesbian can come out of the closet without knowing the difference between electrical tape and duct tape, and also how to properly apply it to nipples while marching in Gay Pride parades. Removing duct tape from nipples without tearing off an areola is a much more advanced skill. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:36 yes One of the wedding vows that most people completely skip over about is the one where the minister tells you that you've been entrusted with a vagina, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, for all the days of your life. That means it's your responsibility to always make sure it's in good working condition, that it's not sagging and that nobody leaves a tampon up there and forgets to take it out. It's a lot of responsibility. Wed, 24 Aug 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-08-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5ACF4914-CE04-11E0-A2FC-47424824019B 445 To Love and to Cherish One of the wedding vows that most people completely skip over about is the one where the minister tells you that you've been entrusted with a vagina, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, for all the days of your life. That means it's your responsibility to always make sure it's in good working condition, that it's not sagging and that nobody leaves a tampon up there and forgets to take it out. It's a lot of responsibility. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:27 yes Clipping coupons can be a healthy way to trim your grocery bill and to save a little money during tough times. Nobody minds waiting a few extra minutes at the checkout stand while grandma goes through her purse to find the Jello coupon that saves her 10 cents on a 6-pack of lime flavor. It only becomes a problem when people start clipping coupons as if it's an extreme sport and then show up at your local grocery store with their coupon encyclopedia filled with 10,000 coupons for 75 cases of yellow mustard and then jump in line in front of you. Sun, 21 Aug 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-08-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast dfa20737-b5a0-4373-8efb-128ea345eb41 444 Tivo Hostage Clipping coupons can be a healthy way to trim your grocery bill and to save a little money during tough times. Nobody minds waiting a few extra minutes at the checkout stand while grandma goes through her purse to find the Jello coupon that saves her 10 cents on a 6-pack of lime flavor. It only becomes a problem when people start clipping coupons as if it's an extreme sport and then show up at your local grocery store with their coupon encyclopedia filled with 10,000 coupons for 75 cases of yellow mustard and then jump in line in front of you. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:41 yes If necessity is the mother of invention, then why hasn't someone invented a weapon that can kill mosquitos in the middle of the night as they buzz by your ears, bite you everywhere they can find an exposed piece of skin and keep you up to all hours of the morning annoying the crap out of you? I'm not asking for much. Maybe just a bedside flame thrower. Sun, 7 Aug 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-08-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9afedcaf-eeb1-41c4-927f-150213218d68 443 West Nile Virus If necessity is the mother of invention, then why hasn't someone invented a weapon that can kill mosquitos in the middle of the night as they buzz by your ears, bite you everywhere they can find an exposed piece of skin and keep you up to all hours of the morning annoying the crap out of you? I'm not asking for much. Maybe just a bedside flame thrower. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:53 yes We put a lot of trust into our doctors when we go in to have some sort of procedure done in the hospital. Once you're asleep on the table with a crowd of people around, wearing only a hospital gown with a slit all the way up your back, anything can happen. Before the anesthesia kicks in, check around for anything suspicious looking, such as anal lube, a six-pack of condoms or instructions about how to upload videos to YouPorn. Thu, 4 Aug 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-08-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 94088fe3-4893-4a5a-9249-2ba5dd95b8b3 442 Full Frontal Ass We put a lot of trust into our doctors when we go in to have some sort of procedure done in the hospital. Once you're asleep on the table with a crowd of people around, wearing only a hospital gown with a slit all the way up your back, anything can happen. Before the anesthesia kicks in, check around for anything suspicious looking, such as anal lube, a six-pack of condoms or instructions about how to upload videos to YouPorn. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:59 yes Just because more states are starting to allow Gay marriage, it doesn't mean you should just rush right into things. There are more things to consider than just whether or not your new spouse will love you 'til death do us part. Now instead of just tossing your crap out on the front lawn, you have to worry about your new spouse getting mad and chopping off your jewels. Better start sleeping with a steel chastity belt...and make sure it's locked tight. Sun, 31 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 41ed8461-9ddb-4cf7-a0cb-2951a6d665d3 441 Bad Ladies Just because more states are starting to allow Gay marriage, it doesn't mean you should just rush right into things. There are more things to consider than just whether or not your new spouse will love you 'til death do us part. Now instead of just tossing your crap out on the front lawn, you have to worry about your new spouse getting mad and chopping off your jewels. Better start sleeping with a steel chastity belt...and make sure it's locked tight. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:31 yes It used to be that a slutty young gold digger could just give an old man a good roll in the hay, he would have a heart attack and die immediately after signing away his will to the new 20 year old he just stared banging. Now with Viagra, those old bastards can hang on forever. Now you really have to think about whether or not it's worth it to marry Hugh Hefner just to be come the heir to the Playboy fortune. Wed, 27 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 31cadc60-2a71-4902-95f7-209a69dfa62f 440 Born This Way It used to be that a slutty young gold digger could just give an old man a good roll in the hay, he would have a heart attack and die immediately after signing away his will to the new 20 year old he just stared banging. Now with Viagra, those old bastards can hang on forever. Now you really have to think about whether or not it's worth it to marry Hugh Hefner just to be come the heir to the Playboy fortune. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:16 yes What's not to like? You get three square (but very salty) meals a day, an enema every other day and someone to sponge bathe your genitals every couple of days. So what if people keep you up with their howling and screaming all night long, the lady next door comes in to your room to tell your visitors that you've been dead for two years or that the cleaning lady withholds toilet paper when you have to take a crap? You're living it up at the lovely Country Villa Convalescent Hospital. Sun, 24 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 2dbdf00d-ab21-471e-83fd-53cab57011d7 439 Dead to Me What's not to like? You get three square (but very salty) meals a day, an enema every other day and someone to sponge bathe your genitals every couple of days. So what if people keep you up with their howling and screaming all night long, the lady next door comes in to your room to tell your visitors that you've been dead for two years or that the cleaning lady withholds toilet paper when you have to take a crap? You're living it up at the lovely Country Villa Convalescent Hospital. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:34 yes Apparently there is a market for previously worn underwear that gets sold out of vending machines. Some people find it erotic and sexy. Some people also find Lesbians to be be hot and sexy. Therefore, previously worn Lesbian underwear must be sexy. Now you have a way to get rid of your old granny underpants with period stains and other discolorations while making some extra cash at the same time. It also saves you a trip to the Goodwill. Wed, 20 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 03156ebd-0d71-47a6-98f4-a7dd7e830469 438 Underpants for Japan Apparently there is a market for previously worn underwear that gets sold out of vending machines. Some people find it erotic and sexy. Some people also find Lesbians to be be hot and sexy. Therefore, previously worn Lesbian underwear must be sexy. Now you have a way to get rid of your old granny underpants with period stains and other discolorations while making some extra cash at the same time. It also saves you a trip to the Goodwill. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:40 yes As Lesbians, we don't always have time to look up all our Lesbian culture questions on the Internet. We need those answers now. For example, if you're a vegan and you meet the woman of your dreams at a bar late one night, how will you know whether or not it's ok for you to go down on her? After all, humans are meat, right? We're going to need someone to create an app for this. Sun, 17 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 73060962-b648-462b-b546-03c6e62b1d50 437 Lesbian Dominoes As Lesbians, we don't always have time to look up all our Lesbian culture questions on the Internet. We need those answers now. For example, if you're a vegan and you meet the woman of your dreams at a bar late one night, how will you know whether or not it's ok for you to go down on her? After all, humans are meat, right? We're going to need someone to create an app for this. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:28 yes There's a reason why people in LA always travel by car everywhere they go and won't even walk to the convenience store on the corner. The car forms a protective barrier to keep you safe from the homeless people and other nuts walking around in Ugg boots in the middle of summer. It's not that being homeless is a problem, it's just that someone must be absolutely out of their mind if they're still wearing Ugg boots years after Paris Hilton gave them up. Sun, 10 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7550b3e5-728a-494f-a608-3c624e9c7109 436 Sweating Bullets There's a reason why people in LA always travel by car everywhere they go and won't even walk to the convenience store on the corner. The car forms a protective barrier to keep you safe from the homeless people and other nuts walking around in Ugg boots in the middle of summer. It's not that being homeless is a problem, it's just that someone must be absolutely out of their mind if they're still wearing Ugg boots years after Paris Hilton gave them up. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:14 yes Lesbians get a bad rap. Everyone thinks it's always the Lesbians that are out recruiting unknowing straight girls to join the ranks of Sisterhood. Finally, the truth can be told. After years of trepidation and doubt, it's finally come out that in reality it's the drunk straight girls that are out recruiting new Lesbians. At least that explains where all the toasters went. Wed, 6 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 49aaf4b9-0fde-4131-af95-d9802279eda8 435 Sporty Straight Chick Lesbians get a bad rap. Everyone thinks it's always the Lesbians that are out recruiting unknowing straight girls to join the ranks of Sisterhood. Finally, the truth can be told. After years of trepidation and doubt, it's finally come out that in reality it's the drunk straight girls that are out recruiting new Lesbians. At least that explains where all the toasters went. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 22:18 yes Congratulations to NY for legalizing Gay marriage! As a public service to help Lesbians across the Empire State, U-Hauls across New York will be shutting down for the next three months. They like to call it a "cooling down" period, but we like to call it insurance for making sure the vagina you touched for the first time last night doesn't become your new wife by next week. Mon, 4 Jul 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-07-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 78bc9609-0465-4778-9be5-429295147706 434 I Heart NY Congratulations to NY for legalizing Gay marriage! As a public service to help Lesbians across the Empire State, U-Hauls across New York will be shutting down for the next three months. They like to call it a "cooling down" period, but we like to call it insurance for making sure the vagina you touched for the first time last night doesn't become your new wife by next week. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:28 yes Roaches all over the floor, thick black hair in the bathtub, a half inch of dirt in the sink and bedbug stains on the mattress. Despite the fact that most people gave the hotel a thumbs down and would not stay there, still there are at least 21% of people that gave it a thumbs up. Those are the 21% of people I never want to meet in my life. Thu, 23 Jun 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-06-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a36e3721-dd50-4719-ad02-33c6242be1d2 433 Working Woman Hotel Roaches all over the floor, thick black hair in the bathtub, a half inch of dirt in the sink and bedbug stains on the mattress. Despite the fact that most people gave the hotel a thumbs down and would not stay there, still there are at least 21% of people that gave it a thumbs up. Those are the 21% of people I never want to meet in my life. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:27 yes It's important for us as Lesbians to make sure that we always uphold the stereotypes people hold about Lesbians. You can do your part by making sure you sport a mullet at least once in your life, buy flannel shirts in three different colors and always be sure to wear comfortable shoes. Whenever possible, hold your wife's hand in public and give her a kiss on the lips in front of a crowd. Why do we need to do this you ask? Because it scares the crap out of straight people. Sun, 19 Jun 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-06-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7582bb61-5723-4ed8-b982-a6e95b56dc1e 432 Chiweenie It's important for us as Lesbians to make sure that we always uphold the stereotypes people hold about Lesbians. You can do your part by making sure you sport a mullet at least once in your life, buy flannel shirts in three different colors and always be sure to wear comfortable shoes. Whenever possible, hold your wife's hand in public and give her a kiss on the lips in front of a crowd. Why do we need to do this you ask? Because it scares the crap out of straight people. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:49 yes What most people fail to realize is that swearing can be a serious addiction. Most addicts are helpless to stop and need some type of intervention to help them break the cycle. You'll know you've hit rock bottom when you realize that you can't get through a complete sentence without swearing at least once, and when the first word that comes out of your baby's mouth is, motherfucker. Wed, 15 Jun 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-06-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 6763f46d-f3fd-4f63-bd8a-92df8f69a068 431 Hard C What most people fail to realize is that swearing can be a serious addiction. Most addicts are helpless to stop and need some type of intervention to help them break the cycle. You'll know you've hit rock bottom when you realize that you can't get through a complete sentence without swearing at least once, and when the first word that comes out of your baby's mouth is, motherfucker. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:58 yes It's finally become clear that the real reason most religions recruit is because getting into heaven is a pyramid scheme. The more people you bring in, the better your chances of getting into heaven during the Rapture. Too bad you can't just get points every time you swipe your credit card. Mon, 13 Jun 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-06-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3842dbfa-35e0-450b-8fa6-4c65904db084 430 Rapture It's finally become clear that the real reason most religions recruit is because getting into heaven is a pyramid scheme. The more people you bring in, the better your chances of getting into heaven during the Rapture. Too bad you can't just get points every time you swipe your credit card. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:45 yes Motherhood sounds all nice and sweet like Winnie The Pooh and lollipops, until you realize that the best way to take a baby's temperature accurately is by using a rectal thermometer. It's bad enough to have your wife staring at you with the phone in her hand ready to dial 911, until you realize that the thermometer you're holding is actually the oral thermometer that you should have been using to take your own temperature earlier that same day. Thu, 2 Jun 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-06-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f2cfa185-db01-4b4f-aaf9-b0e83b3a0703 429 Rectal Thermometer Motherhood sounds all nice and sweet like Winnie The Pooh and lollipops, until you realize that the best way to take a baby's temperature accurately is by using a rectal thermometer. It's bad enough to have your wife staring at you with the phone in her hand ready to dial 911, until you realize that the thermometer you're holding is actually the oral thermometer that you should have been using to take your own temperature earlier that same day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:17 yes Every Lesbian in the world is separated by only three exes or friends. You'll find proof at any event where Lesbians congregate. Tell just one person some interesting or exciting news and the Lesbian phone tree and cell phone networks will light up within 5 minutes to spread the news to everyone. The whole world will know that you're single again before your profile loads on Match.com. Mon, 30 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 388a9de2-ab2e-4245-8fbd-9b2d7e058a28 428 Lezaphone Every Lesbian in the world is separated by only three exes or friends. You'll find proof at any event where Lesbians congregate. Tell just one person some interesting or exciting news and the Lesbian phone tree and cell phone networks will light up within 5 minutes to spread the news to everyone. The whole world will know that you're single again before your profile loads on Match.com. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:18 yes If one is good, then we'll take two. Two times the dirty diapers, two times the amount of food to buy, two times the pairs of shoes and two times the bill for college. Of course, It will only take one time to scare off the boys who try to date the twins before they've reached the age of 35. Thu, 26 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c295a091-f648-43e3-9ebc-032c069cf452 427 Da Girls If one is good, then we'll take two. Two times the dirty diapers, two times the amount of food to buy, two times the pairs of shoes and two times the bill for college. Of course, It will only take one time to scare off the boys who try to date the twins before they've reached the age of 35. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:43 yes When people think of cloning they worry about all the horrible things that might happen. Nobody wants to eat meat from cloned animals and we certainly don't want to think about cloning humans. Unless...instead of all the Lesbian clones showing up with the same hairstyles and the same type of blazers with rolled up sleeves they've been wearing since the 80's, the clones were smoking hot replicas of the hottest women you've ever seen. Then everyone would be ok with cloning. Sun, 22 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b51a0956-d168-451b-8d36-5a9809c3c3b6 426 Lesbian Time When people think of cloning they worry about all the horrible things that might happen. Nobody wants to eat meat from cloned animals and we certainly don't want to think about cloning humans. Unless...instead of all the Lesbian clones showing up with the same hairstyles and the same type of blazers with rolled up sleeves they've been wearing since the 80's, the clones were smoking hot replicas of the hottest women you've ever seen. Then everyone would be ok with cloning. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:31 yes Owning a vagina is a big responsibility. You can't just place that kind of responsibility in anyone's hands and hope for the best. It's important to clean it regularly, to dry it out properly and to make sure no bacteria or mold grows on it. Most of all it's important to pick out a pretty color when you first get one, and to make sure that the carpeting matches the drapes. Wed, 18 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7a304779-a6c6-48ea-8c6f-1906593b1690 425 Chewbacca Owning a vagina is a big responsibility. You can't just place that kind of responsibility in anyone's hands and hope for the best. It's important to clean it regularly, to dry it out properly and to make sure no bacteria or mold grows on it. Most of all it's important to pick out a pretty color when you first get one, and to make sure that the carpeting matches the drapes. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:29 yes Professionals in all walks of life take care of the tools they use to do their job. Top chefs keep their knives protected and razor sharp, artists make sure they're brushes are in top notch shape for their next masterpiece, and musicians strive to make sure their instruments are tuned up perfectly. It's pretty much the same for Lesbians. We keep our nails trimmed, our hands clean and we declare a national emergency that must be taken care of immediately if the dishwasher breaks and it means we might be at risk for dishpan hands. Sun, 15 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f24d0548-015b-4af4-af30-5f38e1bc9e7d 424 Dishpan Hands Professionals in all walks of life take care of the tools they use to do their job. Top chefs keep their knives protected and razor sharp, artists make sure they're brushes are in top notch shape for their next masterpiece, and musicians strive to make sure their instruments are tuned up perfectly. It's pretty much the same for Lesbians. We keep our nails trimmed, our hands clean and we declare a national emergency that must be taken care of immediately if the dishwasher breaks and it means we might be at risk for dishpan hands. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:41 yes Somewhere in the world there must exist an institution where Lesbians can go to learn how to be a proper Lesbian. There will be woodworking classes, workshops to learn all about the different types of denim and flannel, and an extra credit course you can take to help you make your work boots match your outfits. The one class that is required by all attendees will be how to shake hands properly without crushing the crap out of everyone you meet. Mon, 9 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0285f456-8e4e-45f0-8368-f989b0307070 423 Lesbian Finishing School Somewhere in the world there must exist an institution where Lesbians can go to learn how to be a proper Lesbian. There will be woodworking classes, workshops to learn all about the different types of denim and flannel, and an extra credit course you can take to help you make your work boots match your outfits. The one class that is required by all attendees will be how to shake hands properly without crushing the crap out of everyone you meet. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:34 yes Living with your new wife, having sex every night, your arms behind your back with handcuffs and swinging with other single ladies from time to time. It all sounds like it might be a lot of fun...until you realize you're in prison. Then, just when you think it can't get any worse, you get traded for a tampon to a pretty woman called Diabla. Thu, 5 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 39ad6d8a-7131-4178-ac0f-d7688bfe7a4f 422 Scared Straight Living with your new wife, having sex every night, your arms behind your back with handcuffs and swinging with other single ladies from time to time. It all sounds like it might be a lot of fun...until you realize you're in prison. Then, just when you think it can't get any worse, you get traded for a tampon to a pretty woman called Diabla. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:42 yes After serving jury duty for just one day, you'll come to realize that the scariest words you'll ever have to hear are that you'll be judged by a "jury of your peers". It wasn't a courtroom full of Lesbians that showed up for jury service that day. Instead it was the man with his pants below his ass, the lady slumped over two seats out cold for the entire morning, the man with rampant melanomas on his bald head and the skinny queen with pants three sizes too small. Well, maybe him. Mon, 2 May 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-05-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5f745a22-7ed4-4ae8-bc07-f6c1673bc8a4 421 Dead Beat After serving jury duty for just one day, you'll come to realize that the scariest words you'll ever have to hear are that you'll be judged by a "jury of your peers". It wasn't a courtroom full of Lesbians that showed up for jury service that day. Instead it was the man with his pants below his ass, the lady slumped over two seats out cold for the entire morning, the man with rampant melanomas on his bald head and the skinny queen with pants three sizes too small. Well, maybe him. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:21 yes Some things just never need to be unearthed ever again. Instead of being dug up and flaunted out in public, they should simply be burned and tossed in the trash. That goes for the flannel shirt you wore every day of your life from the time you were 4 until you were 10, the boots you thought were so hot every time you wore them to the club, and the dildo that you used on your very first girlfriend until the label wore off completely. Wed, 27 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-04-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast c5d130ef-96f7-46fa-bcea-d397c61dd6a4 420 Time Capsule Some things just never need to be unearthed ever again. Instead of being dug up and flaunted out in public, they should simply be burned and tossed in the trash. That goes for the flannel shirt you wore every day of your life from the time you were 4 until you were 10, the boots you thought were so hot every time you wore them to the club, and the dildo that you used on your very first girlfriend until the label wore off completely. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:58 yes It's easy to tell the city mouse from the country mouse. The city mouse ignores all the loud noises and unknown sounds that go on at night and just continues sleeping. The country mouse has to get up out of bed, find out what's going on and attempt to save the world with a flashlight and a stepstool. One gets a good night sleep and the other goes from compassionate animal lover to the angry neighbor calling Animal Control when the neighbor's dog won't stop barking all night long. Sun, 24 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-04-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 74c09852-e366-485d-a9a6-7e2608cde95e 419 Up All Night It's easy to tell the city mouse from the country mouse. The city mouse ignores all the loud noises and unknown sounds that go on at night and just continues sleeping. The country mouse has to get up out of bed, find out what's going on and attempt to save the world with a flashlight and a stepstool. One gets a good night sleep and the other goes from compassionate animal lover to the angry neighbor calling Animal Control when the neighbor's dog won't stop barking all night long. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:02 yes They may be lurking in a neighborhood near yours and you don't even know it. It's the Lesbian counterpart to the Stepford Wives...the Lezford Wives. They drive their Gaybies to play dates in their understated, yet overpriced, family-safe Volvo. They're dressed neatly in perfectly pressed khaki pants and a delicately starched pink or baby blue polo shirt with a very comfortable pair of designer shoes with low heels. Of course there will still be football on the TV on Sundays and a cold six-pack in the fridge at all times. Sun, 17 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-04-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 105abcc7-9198-4ec0-9523-ab8732deee81 418 The Lezford Wives They may be lurking in a neighborhood near yours and you don't even know it. It's the Lesbian counterpart to the Stepford Wives...the Lezford Wives. They drive their Gaybies to play dates in their understated, yet overpriced, family-safe Volvo. They're dressed neatly in perfectly pressed khaki pants and a delicately starched pink or baby blue polo shirt with a very comfortable pair of designer shoes with low heels. Of course there will still be football on the TV on Sundays and a cold six-pack in the fridge at all times. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:11 yes As a parent you have a responsibility to talk to your children directly about the important things in life. That means telling it exactly as it is and not beating around the bush. This includes sex, masturbation, breasts and periods. There is no more horrifying a surprise for a 12-year old girl than to all of a sudden see blood shooting out of her vagina and coming to realize for the first time that this is going to happen every month of her life for the next 40 years. Wed, 13 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-04-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f8f92d54-76d6-44ec-a042-8e10c40cad10 417 Lollipop As a parent you have a responsibility to talk to your children directly about the important things in life. That means telling it exactly as it is and not beating around the bush. This includes sex, masturbation, breasts and periods. There is no more horrifying a surprise for a 12-year old girl than to all of a sudden see blood shooting out of her vagina and coming to realize for the first time that this is going to happen every month of her life for the next 40 years. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:50 yes A lovely three bedroom house or a multi-compartment Habitrail with lots of spinning wheels and tunnels. Whatever you call it, the dirty little hamsters inside work hard day and night to mess it up. Sometimes you just need someone to come inside to clean up all the sawdust and crap. Hopefully, they'll leave a nice bowl of fresh water, some dry newspaper and some carrots. Sun, 10 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-04-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b7264b8e-fecb-46bf-a4b2-4c4f74a1369d 416 Dirty Little Hamsters A lovely three bedroom house or a multi-compartment Habitrail with lots of spinning wheels and tunnels. Whatever you call it, the dirty little hamsters inside work hard day and night to mess it up. Sometimes you just need someone to come inside to clean up all the sawdust and crap. Hopefully, they'll leave a nice bowl of fresh water, some dry newspaper and some carrots. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:05 yes We typically think of doctors as these super-smart intellectuals who have spent countless years in school studying science, math and all kind of subjects that we can only imagine. Apparently, the one subject they don't teach you in medical school is how Lesbians have sex. You would think with all that college education they would have spent at least one semester living in the dormitory. Wed, 6 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-04-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0366f607-8b0e-4e8d-bd16-b7affdfbbbec 415 PhD in Lesbian We typically think of doctors as these super-smart intellectuals who have spent countless years in school studying science, math and all kind of subjects that we can only imagine. Apparently, the one subject they don't teach you in medical school is how Lesbians have sex. You would think with all that college education they would have spent at least one semester living in the dormitory. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:08 yes No need to go through all the trouble and expense of seeing a doctor when you can perform simple medical procedures at home all by yourself. If your ears get clogged simply run down to the Lesbian Hippie drugstore and pick up some ear candles. Torch them on the kitchen stove until the flames are at least 6 inches high and then run through the house, lay down on the couch and stuff it in your ear. Wait for your hair, the sofa and the rest of the house to catch fire. Sun, 3 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-04-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3e4cbb63-a6d0-48c5-bb8d-fd155e9ec66f 414 Flaiming Ear Candles No need to go through all the trouble and expense of seeing a doctor when you can perform simple medical procedures at home all by yourself. If your ears get clogged simply run down to the Lesbian Hippie drugstore and pick up some ear candles. Torch them on the kitchen stove until the flames are at least 6 inches high and then run through the house, lay down on the couch and stuff it in your ear. Wait for your hair, the sofa and the rest of the house to catch fire. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:09 yes There's a reason why some self-help and support groups that help people with alcohol and drug addiction try to stay anonymous. Not everyone wants the world to know about their private business and all their dirty laundry. The last thing they want is to have some lecherous Lesbian showing up at a love and sex addicts meeting gawking and winking at the hot girls while handing out condoms to all the men. Wed, 30 Mar 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-03-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 02841c14-1f15-430d-b26e-38986cfb6071 413 Love Addicts There's a reason why some self-help and support groups that help people with alcohol and drug addiction try to stay anonymous. Not everyone wants the world to know about their private business and all their dirty laundry. The last thing they want is to have some lecherous Lesbian showing up at a love and sex addicts meeting gawking and winking at the hot girls while handing out condoms to all the men. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:25 yes Almost every little girl has gotten a training bra at one time in their life. Still the question remains...what on earth is a training bra helping you to train? If you don't have a any tits there's no reason to be wearing a bra in the first place. Once you get tits, it's really not that challenging to put on a bra after the first time you snap it in place. The only bra training that really might useful is for Lesbians to get some lessons on how to a quickly unsnap a lady's bra using only one hand. Sun, 27 Mar 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-03-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1becde00-a156-4385-b768-67f99095b192 412 Spring Break Almost every little girl has gotten a training bra at one time in their life. Still the question remains...what on earth is a training bra helping you to train? If you don't have a any tits there's no reason to be wearing a bra in the first place. Once you get tits, it's really not that challenging to put on a bra after the first time you snap it in place. The only bra training that really might useful is for Lesbians to get some lessons on how to a quickly unsnap a lady's bra using only one hand. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:01 yes Southern California has two seasons, bone dry and flooding rain. During the dry season you can go out of the house any time of the day or night and never have to worry about checking the weather at all. When it rains, however, the National Weather service should not only issue an emergency alert that all of a sudden nobody remembers how to drive, but also to be aware that it's wash day for the homeless river lady. When wash day comes, everything gets washed...even if she's wearing it already. Sun, 20 Mar 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-03-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 340f0317-2535-4e95-8c60-034a23910d80 411 DWI - Driving While Irate Southern California has two seasons, bone dry and flooding rain. During the dry season you can go out of the house any time of the day or night and never have to worry about checking the weather at all. When it rains, however, the National Weather service should not only issue an emergency alert that all of a sudden nobody remembers how to drive, but also to be aware that it's wash day for the homeless river lady. When wash day comes, everything gets washed...even if she's wearing it already. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:21 yes The average human passes gas at least 14 times every single day. Gas is a just a natural part of the digestion process and everyone does it. Still...you can rest assured that stinkiest toot you'll do each day will occur at the most inappropriate time possible. If it's not in the middle of the meeting with your boss, it will be right at the moment the new girl you just met goes down on you for the first (and possibly the last) time. Wed, 16 Mar 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-03-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 77338ef2-7368-4968-b022-05c02e9fa5f7 410 Flat D The average human passes gas at least 14 times every single day. Gas is a just a natural part of the digestion process and everyone does it. Still...you can rest assured that stinkiest toot you'll do each day will occur at the most inappropriate time possible. If it's not in the middle of the meeting with your boss, it will be right at the moment the new girl you just met goes down on you for the first (and possibly the last) time. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:56 yes Getting a Brazilian is not just about looking good in a bikini this summer. It's also a good way to help save money during the recession. With a Brazilian you'll need less toilet paper every time you go to the bathroom, which means you can not only buy less toilet paper overall, but you can also buy the single-ply as well. Just think about how many napkins a man with a mustache needs every time he eats...same concept. Sun, 13 Mar 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-03-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 99b5ce54-34f4-4a95-98ba-5b0d7ea8757c 409 Brazilian Getting a Brazilian is not just about looking good in a bikini this summer. It's also a good way to help save money during the recession. With a Brazilian you'll need less toilet paper every time you go to the bathroom, which means you can not only buy less toilet paper overall, but you can also buy the single-ply as well. Just think about how many napkins a man with a mustache needs every time he eats...same concept. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 19:43 yes Just a reminder...the country is on Orange Alert. We're going to stay on Orange Alert just to make sure that you continue to live in a constant state of low level fear paranoia and chronic agitation. If you see something suspicious, such as an abandoned backpack on the street, take immediate action. Call your friend that's a cop so that they can tell you exactly what to do next in that situation...call 911. Wed, 9 Mar 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-03-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 81ef2bb9-7d13-4933-a642-5c6fceb671b0 408 Orange Alert Just a reminder...the country is on Orange Alert. We're going to stay on Orange Alert just to make sure that you continue to live in a constant state of low level fear paranoia and chronic agitation. If you see something suspicious, such as an abandoned backpack on the street, take immediate action. Call your friend that's a cop so that they can tell you exactly what to do next in that situation...call 911. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:50 yes Some people are naturally more sensitive than others. There are those that cry when they see a sad movie. Others are moved by a missing pet getting reunited with an owner. Still others tear up when an 80 year old grandmother comes out to explain how much she loves and appreciates her Gay son. Finally, there are the kind of people that feel the need to write negative comments on the Web because this show wasted 10 minutes of their life. Sun, 6 Mar 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-03-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 2d90b79a-07cd-495a-8ff6-39074919226d 407 Misty Some people are naturally more sensitive than others. There are those that cry when they see a sad movie. Others are moved by a missing pet getting reunited with an owner. Still others tear up when an 80 year old grandmother comes out to explain how much she loves and appreciates her Gay son. Finally, there are the kind of people that feel the need to write negative comments on the Web because this show wasted 10 minutes of their life. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:39 yes College today is so different today from way back in the day. Now instead of having a Chess Club to join for a little extracurricular fun, you have the Slut Club. At least you'll get an education in things that you can use. Everyone needs to learn how to have multiple orgasms, G-spot orgasms and how to do a little B and D the right way. You may as well get something useful out of that college education your parents are spending good money on. Sun, 27 Feb 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-02-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast fec78f28-3f4e-40c0-9c14-25ac560c4d7d 406 Slut Club College today is so different today from way back in the day. Now instead of having a Chess Club to join for a little extracurricular fun, you have the Slut Club. At least you'll get an education in things that you can use. Everyone needs to learn how to have multiple orgasms, G-spot orgasms and how to do a little B and D the right way. You may as well get something useful out of that college education your parents are spending good money on. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:42 yes Everyone should know the joy of owning a toy box. Having a toy box as an adult, however, comes with the same exact responsibilities that you had a as a kid. When you're done playing with your toys you need to clean them up and put them away where they belong. Nobody likes to come home after a long day at work to see a lube-soaked dildo drying out on the kitchen counter. Sun, 20 Feb 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-02-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f0d30081-839d-47ad-ba40-7e18d4b1d45a 405 Sacrifices Everyone should know the joy of owning a toy box. Having a toy box as an adult, however, comes with the same exact responsibilities that you had a as a kid. When you're done playing with your toys you need to clean them up and put them away where they belong. Nobody likes to come home after a long day at work to see a lube-soaked dildo drying out on the kitchen counter. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:48 yes Most people traveling by air these days will do anything to avoid extra charges for luggage, onboard food and anything else that might be considered civilized....even leg room. Instead we'll all pack and stuff our onboard bags so full that even if you had to buy a box of tampons the only way you could get them on the plane is to shove them all inside yourself at once. Wed, 16 Feb 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-02-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8f515e31-abcf-4d01-9e35-6405252c2c6c 404 Traumatized by a Tit Most people traveling by air these days will do anything to avoid extra charges for luggage, onboard food and anything else that might be considered civilized....even leg room. Instead we'll all pack and stuff our onboard bags so full that even if you had to buy a box of tampons the only way you could get them on the plane is to shove them all inside yourself at once. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:35 yes It used to be that going to the theater was a family friendly activity that everyone in the family could enjoy together. You'd take in a show with lions happily singing that get shot by hunters so that the babies have to live as orphans, or a show where everyone is a junkie, lives in sqalor and dies of AIDS. Now when you go the show all you get is straight men's junk parading around on stage, someone's naked but pumping up and down screwing some girl, and the horrified looks of young children that got taken to the show by their parents. Sun, 13 Feb 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-02-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 6a439951-80bc-4dca-ab5f-e5e3c2198c96 403 Full Frontal Nudity It used to be that going to the theater was a family friendly activity that everyone in the family could enjoy together. You'd take in a show with lions happily singing that get shot by hunters so that the babies have to live as orphans, or a show where everyone is a junkie, lives in sqalor and dies of AIDS. Now when you go the show all you get is straight men's junk parading around on stage, someone's naked but pumping up and down screwing some girl, and the horrified looks of young children that got taken to the show by their parents. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:41 yes For some people it's important that the carpeting hides the nasty stains on the floor. For Lesbians it's important that the carpet matches the drapes. But for others, it's only important that your ass doesn't hurt every time you walk across the floor when you remember the screwing you got from the person that sold you the carpet in the first place. Sun, 6 Feb 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-02-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast eabbde53-c1da-4693-9234-b627ed18a28f 402 Carpet Fiber Myalgia For some people it's important that the carpeting hides the nasty stains on the floor. For Lesbians it's important that the carpet matches the drapes. But for others, it's only important that your ass doesn't hurt every time you walk across the floor when you remember the screwing you got from the person that sold you the carpet in the first place. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:37 yes Facebook is a like a pretty girl you see on the street. She looks all clean and nice at first, but when you get her home you wind up with an itchy, scratchy disease a few days later. All of a sudden friends you no longer want to know start propagating on your page like venereal warts, your belly needs flattening, your teeth need whitening and you can get insurance for seniors at a really good price. Wed, 2 Feb 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-02-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 6de367bd-2353-43db-9d3d-fde6a22aa629 401 Unfriend Facebook is a like a pretty girl you see on the street. She looks all clean and nice at first, but when you get her home you wind up with an itchy, scratchy disease a few days later. All of a sudden friends you no longer want to know start propagating on your page like venereal warts, your belly needs flattening, your teeth need whitening and you can get insurance for seniors at a really good price. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:19 yes Selling your old junk on Craiglist may not really be as lucrative as it first seems. Once you take into account the extra insurance you have to take out on your wife that's meeting all the weirdos and then divide the rest of the money you make by the number of hours you have to spend talking to the stalker in you house and cooking him dinner, your hourly wage only comes out to about 50 cents an hour. Sun, 30 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a31fde44-74ac-416d-a0b2-9366c7a02d81 400 How Did I Survive? Selling your old junk on Craiglist may not really be as lucrative as it first seems. Once you take into account the extra insurance you have to take out on your wife that's meeting all the weirdos and then divide the rest of the money you make by the number of hours you have to spend talking to the stalker in you house and cooking him dinner, your hourly wage only comes out to about 50 cents an hour. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:44 yes Some things you expect to be dirty. The subway toilet, a dog's ass, the sewer at the end of your block and the bottom of your shoes. The things you don't expect to be filthy are produce at the grocery store, ATM keypads and the waiter's hands at your favorite restaurant. What you really don't expect is to find a tampon in your bag of fries when go out to eat. Wed, 26 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast dcf54217-72da-4e56-ad73-9d30ab4285ac 399 Deep Fried Tampon Some things you expect to be dirty. The subway toilet, a dog's ass, the sewer at the end of your block and the bottom of your shoes. The things you don't expect to be filthy are produce at the grocery store, ATM keypads and the waiter's hands at your favorite restaurant. What you really don't expect is to find a tampon in your bag of fries when go out to eat. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:41 yes Be careful what you offer to do for a friend just to be nice. There may come a day when you have to make good on that promise, and you might just run out of friends to offer up and throw under the bus in your place. The real test will be when it comes down to the last minute and it looks you may just have to go to the theater to see the live dancing show. At that point do you suck it up and go, or do you get a last minute case of the runs so bad that you can't even leave the house? Sun, 23 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 71392451-bec2-4f9e-a8cf-9e25d499b45e 398 Dodged a Bullet Be careful what you offer to do for a friend just to be nice. There may come a day when you have to make good on that promise, and you might just run out of friends to offer up and throw under the bus in your place. The real test will be when it comes down to the last minute and it looks you may just have to go to the theater to see the live dancing show. At that point do you suck it up and go, or do you get a last minute case of the runs so bad that you can't even leave the house? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 17:31 yes There was a time when you could find a doctor to cure your various STD's on the down low without letting your wife or partner in on your little secret. Today we need computer technicians that can do the same thing. Every once in while you need to find someone that can carefully clean all the viruses and nasty infections off your computer without letting the new girl you're dating know anything about it. All gone. Wed, 19 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4590a826-915a-46a4-a036-9b3b46fec029 397 Big Busted There was a time when you could find a doctor to cure your various STD's on the down low without letting your wife or partner in on your little secret. Today we need computer technicians that can do the same thing. Every once in while you need to find someone that can carefully clean all the viruses and nasty infections off your computer without letting the new girl you're dating know anything about it. All gone. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:08 yes We've said it before, but good advice always bears repeating. It doesn't matter if you have one vibrator or two. Everyone needs to have that one good friend that knows exactly what to do in case of an emergency. If something unexpected were to happen to you, they will simply race over to your house, collect up all your sex toys and secretly take them away to where they can't be found. Your mom will never even know they were there. Sun, 16 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 27457aff-0c77-4fdc-8de7-579d70e9831b 396 One Good Friend We've said it before, but good advice always bears repeating. It doesn't matter if you have one vibrator or two. Everyone needs to have that one good friend that knows exactly what to do in case of an emergency. If something unexpected were to happen to you, they will simply race over to your house, collect up all your sex toys and secretly take them away to where they can't be found. Your mom will never even know they were there. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:31 yes Listen up, straight people. Just because you figured out that Jodie Foster is a Lesbian does not mean you have Gaydar. Even if your best friend is Gay, this does not mean you gain Gaydar by osmosis. This is a special super power that only Gay People are endowed with. No, George Clooney is not Gay, either. Mon, 10 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 68c7a18f-a96d-461f-b160-8791bcb7ad25 395 Mad Skills Listen up, straight people. Just because you figured out that Jodie Foster is a Lesbian does not mean you have Gaydar. Even if your best friend is Gay, this does not mean you gain Gaydar by osmosis. This is a special super power that only Gay People are endowed with. No, George Clooney is not Gay, either. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:33 yes It's bad enough when Americans travel to other countries acting rudely and embarrassing every one of us living in this fine country. Now it's gotten so bad you can't even take Americans out of their own neighborhood before they start behaving badly. The best advice there is for Americans that want to leave their homes is simply to stay inside, sit on the couch and don't eat anything that doesn't taste like chicken. Wed, 5 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5b2adfa9-2b7d-4594-a28a-9aae04ef3548 394 Clorox Chicken It's bad enough when Americans travel to other countries acting rudely and embarrassing every one of us living in this fine country. Now it's gotten so bad you can't even take Americans out of their own neighborhood before they start behaving badly. The best advice there is for Americans that want to leave their homes is simply to stay inside, sit on the couch and don't eat anything that doesn't taste like chicken. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:28 yes Not everyone was brought up with good manners. Some people don't know that it's appropriate to tip the mail carrier and the gardener during the holidays. They don't know to hold a door open for a lady. And, they are absolutely clueless when it comes to dropping a twenty down on the table after the nice lady in airport security gives you a full body pat down. Sun, 2 Jan 2011 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2011-01-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 2ac5a68b-8e23-4c44-a99c-f9893128b748 393 Proper Gentleman Not everyone was brought up with good manners. Some people don't know that it's appropriate to tip the mail carrier and the gardener during the holidays. They don't know to hold a door open for a lady. And, they are absolutely clueless when it comes to dropping a twenty down on the table after the nice lady in airport security gives you a full body pat down. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:17 yes There are two important rules that should be followed when using tools. The first is to always use the right tool for the job. The second is to always wear safety glasses. You never know when a little piece of plastic from the store's theft control security tag will pop up and hit you in the eye. Sat, 25 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7a21e476-bc28-4a75-8dfc-e89386c814fc 392 Bad Role Models There are two important rules that should be followed when using tools. The first is to always use the right tool for the job. The second is to always wear safety glasses. You never know when a little piece of plastic from the store's theft control security tag will pop up and hit you in the eye. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:31 yes Taking a long trip to some place new always seems like a good idea at the time...until you start looking at the news. It's only then that you're confronted with the reality that other cities have bed bug infestations, serial killers and inhuman weather conditions. Perhaps it's best to simply stay at home for the holidays. Wed, 22 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7574096a-7291-44ac-8b7c-d786ab851463 391 Agoraphobic Taking a long trip to some place new always seems like a good idea at the time...until you start looking at the news. It's only then that you're confronted with the reality that other cities have bed bug infestations, serial killers and inhuman weather conditions. Perhaps it's best to simply stay at home for the holidays. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 8:20 yes Going for a massage is the same as having sex with your partner. It's important to have a good line of communication going throughout the entire experience where you talk to each other about what feels good and what's too much. In either case there's a possibility that you could wind up with a hand up your ass going for a deep tissue massage if you just lay there quietly like a dead fish not saying anything. Sun, 19 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 26f1d7d3-1298-47dc-b7c2-a2e14b2d68e9 390 Deep Tissue Going for a massage is the same as having sex with your partner. It's important to have a good line of communication going throughout the entire experience where you talk to each other about what feels good and what's too much. In either case there's a possibility that you could wind up with a hand up your ass going for a deep tissue massage if you just lay there quietly like a dead fish not saying anything. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:29 yes There are some things that guys will never ever have to worry about. They never have to think about wearing white pants in case they get their period early. They never have to worry about the weight of their suitcase going over the weight limit at the airport because they had to pack extra tampons and pads, and they never have to worry about the outline of a super-sized tampon getting rubbed into the back pocket of their jeans. Thu, 16 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 83cb8c97-b569-48f9-936c-3e64fc964cf3 389 Period There are some things that guys will never ever have to worry about. They never have to think about wearing white pants in case they get their period early. They never have to worry about the weight of their suitcase going over the weight limit at the airport because they had to pack extra tampons and pads, and they never have to worry about the outline of a super-sized tampon getting rubbed into the back pocket of their jeans. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:57 yes Landmines used to be the affectionate name to call piles of dog crap in the backyard that needed to be cleaned up before the gardeners showed up. Then came Jersey Shore, which taught us that landmines were simply ugly chicks to avoid in a bar. Now we're back to land mines really being a danger for the gardeners, except this time a gardener really did get blown up. Sun, 12 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ed23c116-389f-4df3-9b2d-d93fce2ce9b5 388 Landmine Landmines used to be the affectionate name to call piles of dog crap in the backyard that needed to be cleaned up before the gardeners showed up. Then came Jersey Shore, which taught us that landmines were simply ugly chicks to avoid in a bar. Now we're back to land mines really being a danger for the gardeners, except this time a gardener really did get blown up. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:11 yes The holidays are a time for joy and good tidings. It's the time of year to see your good friends, spread some holiday cheer and appreciate all that is good in your life. It's also the time of year to forge your wife's name on Christmas cards, to lie about what's in the packages you're sending through the mail at the Post Office, and the time of year that you hope the sexy UPS girl shows up at your door with boxes full of fun gifts for you. Thu, 9 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 25711c00-041c-11e0-a976-0800200c9a66 387 Bras and Panties The holidays are a time for joy and good tidings. It's the time of year to see your good friends, spread some holiday cheer and appreciate all that is good in your life. It's also the time of year to forge your wife's name on Christmas cards, to lie about what's in the packages you're sending through the mail at the Post Office, and the time of year that you hope the sexy UPS girl shows up at your door with boxes full of fun gifts for you. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:24 yes Telling people that it's unhealthy to smoke, showing them ads of smokers talking through a hole in their neck or putting scary warning labels on packs of cigarettes doesn't seem to make a discernible difference in anyone's willingness to light up on a regular basis. The only way to really get people to stop smoking is to raise the price to $50 per pack and to have a case of dynamite explode in their ass every time they light up. Sun, 5 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7fe9f6bf-c100-4302-83bf-6f20600db46c 386 Bum a Smoke? Telling people that it's unhealthy to smoke, showing them ads of smokers talking through a hole in their neck or putting scary warning labels on packs of cigarettes doesn't seem to make a discernible difference in anyone's willingness to light up on a regular basis. The only way to really get people to stop smoking is to raise the price to $50 per pack and to have a case of dynamite explode in their ass every time they light up. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:43 yes It's hard work keeping the country safe from evil. That's why we all have to step up and do our parts if we're going to succeed. If that means going through a full body scanner at the airport, showing up in a Speedo with a nut hanging out, or letting Roxanne's mom listen to this show...we just have to suck it up and do what we have to do. Wed, 1 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-12-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9be942fe-6415-4a8a-9f7e-9f37e58a8b35 385 Scan Me It's hard work keeping the country safe from evil. That's why we all have to step up and do our parts if we're going to succeed. If that means going through a full body scanner at the airport, showing up in a Speedo with a nut hanging out, or letting Roxanne's mom listen to this show...we just have to suck it up and do what we have to do. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:08 yes Sometimes being a good partner simply means putting your own needs aside while you hold your partner's hand to help them through a scary or tough part of their life. It can be a gesture so simple as sitting calmly beside them talking about how hot Rhianna and Beyonce are while your partner is skidding down a treacherous snowy mountain about to careen off a cliff to her death. You can at least leave her with happy thoughts as she goes. Sun, 28 Nov 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-11-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0bf6de97-8fff-4a16-9301-f5e6e1e030da 384 Twenty in Chains Sometimes being a good partner simply means putting your own needs aside while you hold your partner's hand to help them through a scary or tough part of their life. It can be a gesture so simple as sitting calmly beside them talking about how hot Rhianna and Beyonce are while your partner is skidding down a treacherous snowy mountain about to careen off a cliff to her death. You can at least leave her with happy thoughts as she goes. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:29 yes There's nothing wrong with looking in the local sex rag for some companionship and love for an evening. Just be sure to read the description carefully. When Sexy Natasha calls herself 36-24-36 and adds and extra 9" at the end...she may be bringing some extra parts that you were not expecting. At that point you can just roll up the newspaper and stuff it in your shoes and jacket to stay warm all by yourself instead. Thu, 25 Nov 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-11-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8d2e8dbf-c74c-4a00-a012-615d3a018b30 383 Natasha TS There's nothing wrong with looking in the local sex rag for some companionship and love for an evening. Just be sure to read the description carefully. When Sexy Natasha calls herself 36-24-36 and adds and extra 9" at the end...she may be bringing some extra parts that you were not expecting. At that point you can just roll up the newspaper and stuff it in your shoes and jacket to stay warm all by yourself instead. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:44 yes Fifteen feet of fresh snow, freezing temperatures and gale force winds...dressed only in a short sleeved t-shirt, sneakers and a fleece. The unrelenting winter weather is no match for four Lesbians on vacation up in the mountains armed only with an economy rental car, a refrigerator full of beer and a snowblower from before World War II. We can win this even if we have to stay through Thanksgiving deep frying a turkey out in a blizzard. Sat, 20 Nov 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-11-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0637c0f3-02f4-4517-94c2-38b35784cddc 382 Behind Enemy Lines Fifteen feet of fresh snow, freezing temperatures and gale force winds...dressed only in a short sleeved t-shirt, sneakers and a fleece. The unrelenting winter weather is no match for four Lesbians on vacation up in the mountains armed only with an economy rental car, a refrigerator full of beer and a snowblower from before World War II. We can win this even if we have to stay through Thanksgiving deep frying a turkey out in a blizzard. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:59 yes It's true...bush is back. Even if you're not interested in growing a bush for yourself, there is still something you can do to help those in need. For all those ladies that lasered their bushes off back in the nineties and now can't grow a pube if they wanted to, you can grow your own pubic hair and donate it to Locks of Love for pubes. Feel good while helping others to feel good, too. Sun, 14 Nov 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-11-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast fa05a9fc-5bb4-4831-8e35-9f4a64400871 381 Bush is Back It's true...bush is back. Even if you're not interested in growing a bush for yourself, there is still something you can do to help those in need. For all those ladies that lasered their bushes off back in the nineties and now can't grow a pube if they wanted to, you can grow your own pubic hair and donate it to Locks of Love for pubes. Feel good while helping others to feel good, too. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:46 yes It's time to get schooled. Here's your list of true or false questions: 1. All Lesbians drive trucks. 2. All Lesbians have short hair 3. All Lesbians are sporty. 4. All Lesbians are vegetarians. 5. Lesbians like to drive motorcycles. 6. All Lesbians sleep with each other. How are you doing so far? Remember...70% is considered passing. Wed, 10 Nov 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-11-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5702e9ca-5972-4af2-882f-8260647621a1 380 True or False It's time to get schooled. Here's your list of true or false questions: 1. All Lesbians drive trucks. 2. All Lesbians have short hair 3. All Lesbians are sporty. 4. All Lesbians are vegetarians. 5. Lesbians like to drive motorcycles. 6. All Lesbians sleep with each other. How are you doing so far? Remember...70% is considered passing. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:50 yes Recent studies show that among eighteen to twenty-four year olds, 1 in 10 have had sex with partners of each sex. While young people are doubling their pleasure and increasing the number of sex partners they're having, they're also increasing their risk of STD's. The next time your friend brags about how many girls she has had sex with, ask her how many times she's had crabs. Maybe she also has stock in the company that makes RID. Sun, 7 Nov 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-11-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9602795e-c755-4a0b-9d3c-c9a3e36f9b69 379 Never Fall in Love Recent studies show that among eighteen to twenty-four year olds, 1 in 10 have had sex with partners of each sex. While young people are doubling their pleasure and increasing the number of sex partners they're having, they're also increasing their risk of STD's. The next time your friend brags about how many girls she has had sex with, ask her how many times she's had crabs. Maybe she also has stock in the company that makes RID. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:52 yes Imagine a world where all the walls are tan and all the carpets are gray. Imagine a world where people actually think that plaid matches nicely with polka dots, especially when it's purple. And, imagine a world where all haircuts look like the Super Cuts special of the week. What you're imagining right now is a world without Gay men. Wed, 3 Nov 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-11-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 392b0fd5-01d4-4849-a6e3-ff47a87d1d41 378 Thank You, Gay Men Imagine a world where all the walls are tan and all the carpets are gray. Imagine a world where people actually think that plaid matches nicely with polka dots, especially when it's purple. And, imagine a world where all haircuts look like the Super Cuts special of the week. What you're imagining right now is a world without Gay men. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:50 yes If you're going to run for public office in America, you would think that a basic pre-requisite would be to have read the Constitution of the United States of America at least once. It's only a fundamental document that describes the role of government in the 50 states. If they did, they would know about a basic human right that all citizens are born with under the Constitution...the inalienable right to masturbate. Sun, 31 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4bb5351d-6db9-45b1-a094-e3a73b5d7f8a 377 Half a Load If you're going to run for public office in America, you would think that a basic pre-requisite would be to have read the Constitution of the United States of America at least once. It's only a fundamental document that describes the role of government in the 50 states. If they did, they would know about a basic human right that all citizens are born with under the Constitution...the inalienable right to masturbate. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:08 yes Eight seconds is all it takes to win a bull riding contest. Eight seconds is also how long it takes for you to notice the Tecate Girls at Fanzone, for you to pull out your camera to get ready to take the picture of your life, and then for your wife to walk in front of you so that you miss the shot entirely. Wed, 27 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 5bdc154b-cdee-42ae-bdeb-9d50831b8371 376 Eight Seconds in Vegas Eight seconds is all it takes to win a bull riding contest. Eight seconds is also how long it takes for you to notice the Tecate Girls at Fanzone, for you to pull out your camera to get ready to take the picture of your life, and then for your wife to walk in front of you so that you miss the shot entirely. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:30 yes Some people might say it takes balls to just waltz right in and crash a party that you haven't been invited to. If it's a party you haven't been invited to and the party is at the White House and it's an inaugural dinner for the new president of the United States it takes a hell of a lot more than balls. For that it takes an Adam's apple. Sun, 24 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9bef50b5-ec15-46bc-94a4-466f6088fcad 375 Party Crashers Some people might say it takes balls to just waltz right in and crash a party that you haven't been invited to. If it's a party you haven't been invited to and the party is at the White House and it's an inaugural dinner for the new president of the United States it takes a hell of a lot more than balls. For that it takes an Adam's apple. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:38 yes Everyday life can be very stressful all by itself. Just getting through a day can wear you down and make you crazy. Load on top of that a visit from your crazy Dad that you're trying to avoid and you've got a full on nervous breakdown waiting to happen. At that point there's only one thing that's going to work...sex and a valium. Wed, 20 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 2365368e-c14b-41af-ad88-9b5e8a5426a3 374 House Guest Everyday life can be very stressful all by itself. Just getting through a day can wear you down and make you crazy. Load on top of that a visit from your crazy Dad that you're trying to avoid and you've got a full on nervous breakdown waiting to happen. At that point there's only one thing that's going to work...sex and a valium. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:00 yes Just because you're watching a long movie and you've had a large soda at the beginning of the show, does not mean the answer is to wear adult diapers to the theater so that you don't have to get up to pee in the middle. The answer is also not to run into the bathroom, hover over the toilet like a UFO and then run out as fast as you can leaving sprinkles all over the seat. Piss in a bottle like everyone else and just leave it in the movie theater for someone else to clean up. Sun, 17 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8a7f1b21-11a7-4052-8a20-a5e6db926c45 373 Run Pee Just because you're watching a long movie and you've had a large soda at the beginning of the show, does not mean the answer is to wear adult diapers to the theater so that you don't have to get up to pee in the middle. The answer is also not to run into the bathroom, hover over the toilet like a UFO and then run out as fast as you can leaving sprinkles all over the seat. Piss in a bottle like everyone else and just leave it in the movie theater for someone else to clean up. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:15 yes Just because you're a Lesbian does not mean you a license to use tools. You may be a pro with the "tools" you use in the bedroom, but when you start to think that you can wield real tools outside of the house...that's when someone is going to get hurt. Don't even think about using power tools. That kind of work should be left to a licensed Lesbian professional. Sun, 10 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f01f100f-25b5-4702-a131-6b604d9c361b 372 Showing Some Bone Just because you're a Lesbian does not mean you a license to use tools. You may be a pro with the "tools" you use in the bedroom, but when you start to think that you can wield real tools outside of the house...that's when someone is going to get hurt. Don't even think about using power tools. That kind of work should be left to a licensed Lesbian professional. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:45 yes Nothing sucks worse than being a young Lesbian without your own set of wheels. You have to rely on your mom to drop you off at your girlfriend's house, only to have her pick you up a few hours later smelling like sex. All you can do is long for the days when you can take your girl out for a date in your own vehicle to a drive-in movie and a pizza in the back of your pick-up truck under the covers. How do you spell Klassy? Wed, 6 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9c1d9400-55e7-45ea-9dd9-a98c6a25bc93 371 Klassy With a K Nothing sucks worse than being a young Lesbian without your own set of wheels. You have to rely on your mom to drop you off at your girlfriend's house, only to have her pick you up a few hours later smelling like sex. All you can do is long for the days when you can take your girl out for a date in your own vehicle to a drive-in movie and a pizza in the back of your pick-up truck under the covers. How do you spell Klassy? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:55 yes Now that Fall is here it's time to start thinking about staying in tune with all the new fashions of the season. It's not only important to look good, but you you want to be stylish at the same time. No more of those dated looks from the eighties for you, and that includes your bush. Styling your bush should be just as important as styling your hair. Although not everyone is going to see it, you still want it to look good when they do. Sun, 3 Oct 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-10-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ecfff26c-5fcd-493e-95af-3c4542f7c84c 370 Bushwacker Now that Fall is here it's time to start thinking about staying in tune with all the new fashions of the season. It's not only important to look good, but you you want to be stylish at the same time. No more of those dated looks from the eighties for you, and that includes your bush. Styling your bush should be just as important as styling your hair. Although not everyone is going to see it, you still want it to look good when they do. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:40 yes Parable - noun [par-uh-buhl]. A short allegorical story designed to illustrate or teach some truth, religous principle or moral lesson. If you're a Gay man deep in the closet and ashamed of yourself for being who you are...then please stop bashing other Gay people! Just cut it out! Wed, 29 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-09-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast cacf2f6f-8007-49e7-91d0-f8729c4e86dd 369 A Parable Parable - noun [par-uh-buhl]. A short allegorical story designed to illustrate or teach some truth, religous principle or moral lesson. If you're a Gay man deep in the closet and ashamed of yourself for being who you are...then please stop bashing other Gay people! Just cut it out! 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:03 yes History may be as queer as a three dollar bill, but that doesn't mean you'll find much about Gay history in your school textbooks. Most people probably don't know a whole lot about their Gay predecessors at all, or even where to start looking. Out and About Tours is on a mission to change all that. Hop on board the bus and find out all the great history you've been missing out on. Sun, 26 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-09-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast fa8ee74e-4b2a-4c35-bad2-bbd821b07b60 368 History Is So Gay History may be as queer as a three dollar bill, but that doesn't mean you'll find much about Gay history in your school textbooks. Most people probably don't know a whole lot about their Gay predecessors at all, or even where to start looking. Out and About Tours is on a mission to change all that. Hop on board the bus and find out all the great history you've been missing out on. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:04 yes Everyone needs someone they can count on when the going gets tough. You need someone that can provide the necessary air cover when you're trying to hit on that really cute guy that you've been staring at all night long at the club. Just be careful who you choose to be your Wing Girl, however. You don't want your creepy Lesbian friend hitting on the hot guy you've been checking out. In the end he might just wind up liking her better than you. Thu, 23 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-09-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7237cf03-e3b9-4271-bb10-a244b41c0014 367 Wing Girl Everyone needs someone they can count on when the going gets tough. You need someone that can provide the necessary air cover when you're trying to hit on that really cute guy that you've been staring at all night long at the club. Just be careful who you choose to be your Wing Girl, however. You don't want your creepy Lesbian friend hitting on the hot guy you've been checking out. In the end he might just wind up liking her better than you. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:41 yes Americans are an adventurous lot. We like to go out and explore new areas, see new sights and try exciting activities we've never tried before. We'll try anything once and even twice if we like. New and interesting foods are no exception. In fact, the more exotic it is...the better. Just make sure it tastes like chicken, however, or else you can be certain that we're going to hate it. Other than that...bring it on. Mon, 20 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-09-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e8eda7a5-6e67-4b71-bd1a-9a99aabcab59 366 Tastes Like Chicken Americans are an adventurous lot. We like to go out and explore new areas, see new sights and try exciting activities we've never tried before. We'll try anything once and even twice if we like. New and interesting foods are no exception. In fact, the more exotic it is...the better. Just make sure it tastes like chicken, however, or else you can be certain that we're going to hate it. Other than that...bring it on. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:41 yes Repetitive motion injuries can be incredibly debilitating and they can strike at any time with devastating impact to your everyday life. Instead of leaving things to chance, hire a personal trainer to get you in shape for those long sex sessions with your brand new partner before you start dating. Of course, if you do happen to throw out a hip or slip a disc having sex, you can just go into work the next day and blame it on your job. Wed, 15 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-09-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 10abdf6f-36a5-4d96-9cb7-5f703dd2dd13 365 Workers Comp Repetitive motion injuries can be incredibly debilitating and they can strike at any time with devastating impact to your everyday life. Instead of leaving things to chance, hire a personal trainer to get you in shape for those long sex sessions with your brand new partner before you start dating. Of course, if you do happen to throw out a hip or slip a disc having sex, you can just go into work the next day and blame it on your job. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 7:54 yes Alaska is cold any time of the year, so the best thing you can do when you go up there to visit is to seek out a nice warm Klondyke to help you turn up the heat. Just beware of the faux Lesbians that show up with crew cuts and rat tails wearing overalls. They may just be straight women whose hairdresser thought that looked cute. Sun, 12 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-09-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1328e9ba-3304-42fa-8b00-8e5d8e2c8027 364 Tracking the Klondyke Alaska is cold any time of the year, so the best thing you can do when you go up there to visit is to seek out a nice warm Klondyke to help you turn up the heat. Just beware of the faux Lesbians that show up with crew cuts and rat tails wearing overalls. They may just be straight women whose hairdresser thought that looked cute. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 20:49 yes It's tough enough to come out to your parents, but when your parents are ok with you being Gay and you have a problem with it...then you're in serious trouble. Fortunately, for those parents working hard to accept their LGBT family member there's a place they can go to meet other parents dealing with those same issues. It's called PFLAG. Google it. Wed, 8 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-09-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast cb6b7d04-4c20-4c56-9a7e-9e2a289501bd 363 On Tour It's tough enough to come out to your parents, but when your parents are ok with you being Gay and you have a problem with it...then you're in serious trouble. Fortunately, for those parents working hard to accept their LGBT family member there's a place they can go to meet other parents dealing with those same issues. It's called PFLAG. Google it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:46 yes Next time you think about getting up out of your airline seat to check your luggage before the plane comes to a complete stop, you may want to reconsider. You never know when the gentle, smiling flight attendant will decide it's time to go out in a ball of flames after 28 years by calling you a nasty name over the PA system, grabbing a couple of beers and hurling himself out of the plane on the emergency slide. Sat, 28 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 50370f79-b108-4441-a76c-52a65f8ffe12 362 Free Steven Slater Next time you think about getting up out of your airline seat to check your luggage before the plane comes to a complete stop, you may want to reconsider. You never know when the gentle, smiling flight attendant will decide it's time to go out in a ball of flames after 28 years by calling you a nasty name over the PA system, grabbing a couple of beers and hurling himself out of the plane on the emergency slide. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:02 yes How surprised were you the first time you had sex with your wife when you found out she wasn't really a virgin after all? Now you can relive that special moment with your one and only with the replacement hymen operation. If that seems like too much trouble to go through, then you can simply order a hymen replacement kit online. Capsule of fake blood included with every order. Wed, 25 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b467b075-6250-4f54-8f64-40585ac63018 361 Party Favors How surprised were you the first time you had sex with your wife when you found out she wasn't really a virgin after all? Now you can relive that special moment with your one and only with the replacement hymen operation. If that seems like too much trouble to go through, then you can simply order a hymen replacement kit online. Capsule of fake blood included with every order. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:35 yes So rare is the partner that will take it upon herself to go back to the store she hates more than anyplace else on earth to return an item to get a replacement while you sit out in the parking lot rocking out to the car radio watching all the young hotties walk by with their tramp stamps and moose knuckles hanging out. Instead of bringing it up on a podcast, you might be better served to simply keep your mouth shut and just say "thank you". Sun, 22 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e386cd85-4c96-4a76-b7ad-b402d0a2871f 360 Moose Knuckle(c) So rare is the partner that will take it upon herself to go back to the store she hates more than anyplace else on earth to return an item to get a replacement while you sit out in the parking lot rocking out to the car radio watching all the young hotties walk by with their tramp stamps and moose knuckles hanging out. Instead of bringing it up on a podcast, you might be better served to simply keep your mouth shut and just say "thank you". 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 19:12 yes There's nothing wrong with wanting to do a good deed by helping out animals without a home. You can visit your local shelter and adopt all kinds of needy pets. It only becomes a problem when you think you have only a few pets numbering around 150, but it really turns out that you have over 250 feral beasts running around your home crapping on the carpet. Wed, 18 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 51a43acf-5c5e-4daa-82cc-9141551f00f0 359 501(c) There's nothing wrong with wanting to do a good deed by helping out animals without a home. You can visit your local shelter and adopt all kinds of needy pets. It only becomes a problem when you think you have only a few pets numbering around 150, but it really turns out that you have over 250 feral beasts running around your home crapping on the carpet. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:07 yes One thing is the absolute truth. Lesbians like to be comfortable. That's why our favorite summer outfit consists of cargo shorts, a t-shirt and some nice comfortable Lesbian sandals. The only puzzling thing is why straight men enjoy wearing the exact same outfit. It's really hard to say who thought of it first and who is just copying the other. Sun, 15 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 6da29ecc-7f29-438b-8b24-699329254db8 358 Goat Feet One thing is the absolute truth. Lesbians like to be comfortable. That's why our favorite summer outfit consists of cargo shorts, a t-shirt and some nice comfortable Lesbian sandals. The only puzzling thing is why straight men enjoy wearing the exact same outfit. It's really hard to say who thought of it first and who is just copying the other. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:50 yes Now that we're older we look at young Lesbians clandestinely holding hands at the theater trying to steal a sweet moment in a crowded area, hoping that their friends don't see that they're really having sex together every instant they can steal away. Instead of being supportive and respectful, all we can do is stare and forget that we did exactly the same things when we were younger...and thought nobody was watching. Tue, 10 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast d22ab357-966e-4f3e-aa9c-debfb3adf60a 357 Priceless Now that we're older we look at young Lesbians clandestinely holding hands at the theater trying to steal a sweet moment in a crowded area, hoping that their friends don't see that they're really having sex together every instant they can steal away. Instead of being supportive and respectful, all we can do is stare and forget that we did exactly the same things when we were younger...and thought nobody was watching. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:43 yes It was an amazing day in Gay history as the proposition to ban Gay marriage in California was deemed unconstitutional by a US chief district judge. Although that's great news, it doesn't mean that it's time to trade in your U-Haul for a wedding ceremony. Just because she touches you down there in a way you've never felt before...it doesn't mean you've just found your soulmate. Trust us... Thu, 5 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, lesbian internet, lesbian radio, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1b194a34-fd29-4d6b-bd93-2db86a686d0d 356 From H8 to GR8 It was an amazing day in Gay history as the proposition to ban Gay marriage in California was deemed unconstitutional by a US chief district judge. Although that's great news, it doesn't mean that it's time to trade in your U-Haul for a wedding ceremony. Just because she touches you down there in a way you've never felt before...it doesn't mean you've just found your soulmate. Trust us... 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:27 yes It's been said that some of the most successful entrepreneurs started their businesses in times of a recession. All it takes is some out of the box thinking. If we can have Harry Potter jelly beans that sometimes taste like vomit, why can't we have a "scratch and sniff" vagina candy that most of the time tastes delicious, but then every once in a while you get the one that tastes like vaginosis? Why not? Wed, 4 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3c49b19e-3217-4e22-9299-9472edabf86d 355 Out of the Box It's been said that some of the most successful entrepreneurs started their businesses in times of a recession. All it takes is some out of the box thinking. If we can have Harry Potter jelly beans that sometimes taste like vomit, why can't we have a "scratch and sniff" vagina candy that most of the time tastes delicious, but then every once in a while you get the one that tastes like vaginosis? Why not? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:44 yes Before you get into a new relationship, you may want to take a look at the new prospect's track record with breakups. It's not about how many breakups they've had, but more about how they behave during a breakup. You don't want to be the subject of the next Eminem song with all your blubbering voicemail messages crafted into the next hit song making it to the top of the charts on the radio. Sun, 1 Aug 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-08-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e4f31934-dc89-4256-9f9c-56520e704691 354 Five Skulls Before you get into a new relationship, you may want to take a look at the new prospect's track record with breakups. It's not about how many breakups they've had, but more about how they behave during a breakup. You don't want to be the subject of the next Eminem song with all your blubbering voicemail messages crafted into the next hit song making it to the top of the charts on the radio. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:19 yes There is absolutely no need to worry about the possibility of marijuana becoming legalized in the United States. Legalization has about as much chance of getting passed as Gay marriage in California. It's not because people aren't supportive. It's just that the people that would support the ballot initiative will forget to actually get out to vote on election day. Wed, 28 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-07-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8051c1ff-4c57-4077-9cfe-dfab8c40c53f 353 Medicated There is absolutely no need to worry about the possibility of marijuana becoming legalized in the United States. Legalization has about as much chance of getting passed as Gay marriage in California. It's not because people aren't supportive. It's just that the people that would support the ballot initiative will forget to actually get out to vote on election day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:25 yes Quitting smoking can be very challenging, and different people have different approaches.  Some people like to go it cold turkey and others try to taper off until they're down to just a few smokes a day before stopping altogether. When it's the three year-old smoking two packs a day, however, just buy him some Nicorette gum and call it a day. Sun, 25 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-07-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a53c45a9-7e87-494f-9e5c-00bd64cab44c 352 Two Packs a Day Quitting smoking can be very challenging, and different people have different approaches.  Some people like to go it cold turkey and others try to taper off until they're down to just a few smokes a day before stopping altogether. When it's the three year-old smoking two packs a day, however, just buy him some Nicorette gum and call it a day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:27 yes The next time you feel like someone needs to die because their car alarm starts going off incessantly all night long, you may want to consider the circumstances. If the real reason they can't get up to turn it off at that exact moment is that they're simply in bed with some hot chick getting laid, then maybe you can have a little more sympathy. After all, would you even want to get up to answer the phone? Tue, 20 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-07-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast de1a00f7-1bb3-4de7-b1bc-e09d674a565e 351 Alarmed The next time you feel like someone needs to die because their car alarm starts going off incessantly all night long, you may want to consider the circumstances. If the real reason they can't get up to turn it off at that exact moment is that they're simply in bed with some hot chick getting laid, then maybe you can have a little more sympathy. After all, would you even want to get up to answer the phone? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:15 yes The patient may be on the table, slit open with her guts hanging out...but that doesn't necessarily mean that it's over. We can rebuild her, make her better than before, stronger, faster... Wait a minute, we're not talking about the Bionic Woman here. The computer is on the fritz and we're putting her back together. It's just that it would be so much easier if we could tell her to take a pill and call us in the morning. Sun, 18 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-07-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 3fd2d9bc-9753-45b4-8e4f-67d104294685 350 Uh Oh The patient may be on the table, slit open with her guts hanging out...but that doesn't necessarily mean that it's over. We can rebuild her, make her better than before, stronger, faster... Wait a minute, we're not talking about the Bionic Woman here. The computer is on the fritz and we're putting her back together. It's just that it would be so much easier if we could tell her to take a pill and call us in the morning. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 7:22 yes These days you just never really know where evil might be lurking, so you have to be vigilant at all times. Even if you've only stepped out to vote it's important not to let your guard down because the sweet little old lady that showed up to cast her vote that day may decide to fly her freak flag when she finds out that the number of voting booths for Democrats is larger than those for the Republicans. Call for backup. Wed, 7 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-07-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast d24187e6-718b-46e9-88b3-e480e8cc9b70 349 Hanging Chad These days you just never really know where evil might be lurking, so you have to be vigilant at all times. Even if you've only stepped out to vote it's important not to let your guard down because the sweet little old lady that showed up to cast her vote that day may decide to fly her freak flag when she finds out that the number of voting booths for Democrats is larger than those for the Republicans. Call for backup. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:28 yes Nicknames are all fun and games until someone gets them all mixed up and calls one girlfriend by the other one's name...all in front of the third one that the first one is having an affair with. If people would just stop naming their daughters who will eventually grow up to be Lesbians by the name of Sue...none of this would be a problem. Then we wouldn't need nicknames such as Finger, Moaner, Lips or Tweaker. Sun, 4 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-07-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4306aa61-d38c-47cc-8cc6-945dac6bde60 348 Bitcheater Nicknames are all fun and games until someone gets them all mixed up and calls one girlfriend by the other one's name...all in front of the third one that the first one is having an affair with. If people would just stop naming their daughters who will eventually grow up to be Lesbians by the name of Sue...none of this would be a problem. Then we wouldn't need nicknames such as Finger, Moaner, Lips or Tweaker. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:59 yes It's good to have a Cinderella around the house. Not the kind that stays up partying until midnight, loses her shoe and then falls in love with some guy she just met. Instead you want the kind that stays home, cleans the house, scrubs the floor, does the dishes and takes care of all the chores. You want a Cinderella that can be your own personal bitch. Wed, 30 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-06-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 1bb67af1-e4f2-4c62-bef1-7f2a364081b7 347 Cinderella It's good to have a Cinderella around the house. Not the kind that stays up partying until midnight, loses her shoe and then falls in love with some guy she just met. Instead you want the kind that stays home, cleans the house, scrubs the floor, does the dishes and takes care of all the chores. You want a Cinderella that can be your own personal bitch. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:30 yes It's probably a good idea that Gay people are not allowed to get married and legally adopt in some states. Otherwise, they would be doing outrageous things such as selling their babies on Craig's List, putting their kids up for adoption on E-Bay or worst of all, they might even want to marry their pets. The worst part about it is...then they would be just like straight people. Sun, 27 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-06-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast da26b2de-67b3-4901-909d-e29d99e42053 346 Bargain Basement Baby It's probably a good idea that Gay people are not allowed to get married and legally adopt in some states. Otherwise, they would be doing outrageous things such as selling their babies on Craig's List, putting their kids up for adoption on E-Bay or worst of all, they might even want to marry their pets. The worst part about it is...then they would be just like straight people. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 7:03 yes Damn...you thought this show was going to be about something else! Seriously, if big cities would simply install poles that dispense plastic bags the same way they do at some dog parks, then when you're downtown and you have to take a crap...you can just grab a bag and pick it up yourself. Wouldn't that make everything a whole lot nicer? Wed, 23 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-06-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9adfac85-fab0-437b-a906-22ea8a6c5592 345 Going Downtown Damn...you thought this show was going to be about something else! Seriously, if big cities would simply install poles that dispense plastic bags the same way they do at some dog parks, then when you're downtown and you have to take a crap...you can just grab a bag and pick it up yourself. Wouldn't that make everything a whole lot nicer? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:11 yes Sometimes it's hard to know exactly what to do in a difficult situation. You're not sure what the right course of action migh be or how it will affect your future. You stress about it, turn it over and over in your mind and still you can't figure out what would be the right thing to do. So, you think about someone you admire and respect and what they would do in the same situation...and then you do the exact opposite. Sun, 20 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-06-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 450fe4b4-b7ca-45f4-aa0b-05701a6ed4ab 344 W.W.R.D. Sometimes it's hard to know exactly what to do in a difficult situation. You're not sure what the right course of action migh be or how it will affect your future. You stress about it, turn it over and over in your mind and still you can't figure out what would be the right thing to do. So, you think about someone you admire and respect and what they would do in the same situation...and then you do the exact opposite. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:03 yes Every day is a new Gay. It seems that every time we listen to the news or open a newspaper we hear about a new celebrity coming out of the closet. Some are a complete surprise, some we're happy to have on our side, and others we wind up scratching our head thinking, "what took you so long?" Then there are those that don't even need to bother announcing themselves. Barry Manilow. Sun, 6 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-06-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 47ec7f25-3a5b-41c3-afac-341b535b1505 343 Country Gay Every day is a new Gay. It seems that every time we listen to the news or open a newspaper we hear about a new celebrity coming out of the closet. Some are a complete surprise, some we're happy to have on our side, and others we wind up scratching our head thinking, "what took you so long?" Then there are those that don't even need to bother announcing themselves. Barry Manilow. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 15:22 yes The key to true happiness is in finding something that you not only enjoy, but something that you're good at and that you can make a good living doing. If you try hard enough and you really put your mind to it, you'll be able to find that one thing that makes you feel completely fulfilled....even if your true love is trimming bushes into mullets and adding extensions to pubic hair. Wed, 2 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-06-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast a5a972a7-3a2c-42f9-9aa9-8cfbb45aa1b6 342 Bush Mullet The key to true happiness is in finding something that you not only enjoy, but something that you're good at and that you can make a good living doing. If you try hard enough and you really put your mind to it, you'll be able to find that one thing that makes you feel completely fulfilled....even if your true love is trimming bushes into mullets and adding extensions to pubic hair. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:23 yes For all those special Lesbians in your life, there's one gift that keeps on giving month after month. It's educational, entertaining and fun. You might even increase your vocabulary with all the fabulous articles you'll read in every issue. The best part about it is that a full year subscription to "Playboy" will cost you less than $20 per year. A veritable bargain. Sun, 30 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 6d70814e-133a-4b7a-9bc3-00cba3159cb8 341 Red Blooded American Lesbian For all those special Lesbians in your life, there's one gift that keeps on giving month after month. It's educational, entertaining and fun. You might even increase your vocabulary with all the fabulous articles you'll read in every issue. The best part about it is that a full year subscription to "Playboy" will cost you less than $20 per year. A veritable bargain. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:40 yes Dating would be so much easier if everyone would simply pick up a package of "Hello My Name Is..." stickers and add all the attributes their future exes need to know. Would it kill you to just let everyone know up front that you're a stalker, that you're clingy and smothering, that you like sex on the first date, that you have mother issues or crazy exes still in your life? If you give great orgasms...don't forget to add that helpful piece of info, too. Wed, 26 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 9b68402d-5e28-4e42-9390-988fdf20cd6e 340 Lifetime U-Haul Loyalty Discount Dating would be so much easier if everyone would simply pick up a package of "Hello My Name Is..." stickers and add all the attributes their future exes need to know. Would it kill you to just let everyone know up front that you're a stalker, that you're clingy and smothering, that you like sex on the first date, that you have mother issues or crazy exes still in your life? If you give great orgasms...don't forget to add that helpful piece of info, too. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:01 yes It's Pride season once again and it's time to get out and celebrate. Break out those penis maracas, the electrical tape for your nipples and every bit of rainbow paraphernalia you can find. Take your half-naked ass over to your local Gay Pride event and don't leave until you've gotten your fill of the the Mojito pole dancers, or at least the phone number of your local neighborhood porn star. Sun, 23 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast bc2da47b-70ae-44b2-8d65-59a5a874150e 339 Mojito Pride It's Pride season once again and it's time to get out and celebrate. Break out those penis maracas, the electrical tape for your nipples and every bit of rainbow paraphernalia you can find. Take your half-naked ass over to your local Gay Pride event and don't leave until you've gotten your fill of the the Mojito pole dancers, or at least the phone number of your local neighborhood porn star. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:33 yes What if it were really true? What if General Naduka really does have $16.1000 billion dollars from your dead relatives in Nigeria that you've never met, but that were killed in a wretched car accident three years ago? What if the good General has been looking for you..the sole living relative...for the past three years? Was that a unicorn that just flew by? Wed, 19 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 6cd2fc47-d0cb-4a9f-ae48-9afd9cc5b87d 338 Bye Poor People What if it were really true? What if General Naduka really does have $16.1000 billion dollars from your dead relatives in Nigeria that you've never met, but that were killed in a wretched car accident three years ago? What if the good General has been looking for you..the sole living relative...for the past three years? Was that a unicorn that just flew by? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:51 yes It doesn't matter how hot she is or how much you're in love with her. It doesn't matter if that man she's with is no good for her. That straight girl best friend of yours is off limits! The only thing that can come of it is to have one less friend...and an addiction to "General Hospital" that may last you the rest of your life. Of course, if she touches you first...then it's on. Sun, 16 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8d3fab10-6167-11df-a08a-0800200c9a66 337 Best Friend's Vagina It doesn't matter how hot she is or how much you're in love with her. It doesn't matter if that man she's with is no good for her. That straight girl best friend of yours is off limits! The only thing that can come of it is to have one less friend...and an addiction to "General Hospital" that may last you the rest of your life. Of course, if she touches you first...then it's on. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:27 yes There's a place where 1 out of 10 people are straight, the principal and most of the teachers at the school are Lesbians, and straight people are allowed to get married, but not divorced. The only problem is that every one of the Lesbians is an ex of everyone else's current wife, and all the kids have multiple mommies and step-mommies. It's also the new location for MTV's "Dykesey Shore". Wed, 12 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7cb7f41c-23ea-4e4c-a4fd-c814ab32f5ba 336 New Dykesey There's a place where 1 out of 10 people are straight, the principal and most of the teachers at the school are Lesbians, and straight people are allowed to get married, but not divorced. The only problem is that every one of the Lesbians is an ex of everyone else's current wife, and all the kids have multiple mommies and step-mommies. It's also the new location for MTV's "Dykesey Shore". 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:37 yes It's a beautiful feeling to be a free-shitter. Someone that can take a dump no matter where they are. They can be on vacation, at work, at a friend's house or even out shopping. If the urge comes over them there is nothing stopping them from pinching a loaf wherever they are. Until one day when divine retribution finally comes calling...and their world is forever changed... Sun, 9 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ee0394ec-5797-4f2d-9c8a-873bc40f80a3 335 A Little Italian in You It's a beautiful feeling to be a free-shitter. Someone that can take a dump no matter where they are. They can be on vacation, at work, at a friend's house or even out shopping. If the urge comes over them there is nothing stopping them from pinching a loaf wherever they are. Until one day when divine retribution finally comes calling...and their world is forever changed... 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:51 yes When someone asks you what ethnicity you are, what they really want is where you and and your relatives are from originally. They don't want to hear that you've had some Italian in you because you slept with some hot Italian chick that put her fingers or tongue inside you. Of course, when you ask your parents that question, you don't want to hear that you're from somewhere other than where they've been telling you for your whole life up until now either. Wed, 5 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e6f1279b-2077-4b99-8764-c8281f5574d0 334 Vegetables Are Your Friend It's a beautiful feeling to be a free-shitter. Someone that can take a dump no matter where they are. They can be on vacation, at work, at a friend's house or even out shopping. If the urge comes over them there is nothing stopping them from pinching a loaf wherever they are. Until one day when divine retribution finally comes calling...and their world is forever changed... 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 8:22 yes There is a certain protocol to taking the red-eye when you fly at night. After going through the obligatory safety speech the flight attendants ask everyone to pull down their window shades and dim the lights so that everyone can sleep. Despite all the relevant clues...there's always bound to be some dimwit that continues to stay up chatting and laughing loudly all night long. You sit there getting more and more annoyed...until you realize that person is with you. Sun, 2 May 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-05-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b06eebc0-5661-11df-9879-0800200c9a66 333 Red Eye There is a certain protocol to taking the red-eye when you fly at night. After going through the obligatory safety speech the flight attendants ask everyone to pull down their window shades and dim the lights so that everyone can sleep. Despite all the relevant clues...there's always bound to be some dimwit that continues to stay up chatting and laughing loudly all night long. You sit there getting more and more annoyed...until you realize that person is with you. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:20 yes Just because you like plain vanilla sex, it doesn't mean that everyone is content with the same old thing night after night. Some people might actually get a thrill out of someone squatting over them in the middle of the night ready to take a hot steaming dump right on their chest. Who are you to judge? Sun, 25 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-04-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4a1bc842-b757-4f4c-ac75-00a4a0740cbd 332 Don't Judge Just because you like plain vanilla sex, it doesn't mean that everyone is content with the same old thing night after night. Some people might actually get a thrill out of someone squatting over them in the middle of the night ready to take a hot steaming dump right on their chest. Who are you to judge? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:06 yes After you've finally admitted that you do have a problem there's another often overlooked step towards getting your life back on track - that's actually wanting to do something about it. What most people don't realize is that cussing is the gateway to other bad behaviors, such as bullying people, tossing high school girls into gym lockers and flipping off old ladies in traffic. Wed, 21 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-04-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast ef66c245-fa02-4f46-bb2e-82dcd3921fb7 331 Cuss Free Zone After you've finally admitted that you do have a problem there's another often overlooked step towards getting your life back on track - that's actually wanting to do something about it. What most people don't realize is that cussing is the gateway to other bad behaviors, such as bullying people, tossing high school girls into gym lockers and flipping off old ladies in traffic. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:55 yes You're an almost 60-year old lady...unmarried...attractive...wealthy...and you've just kicked your boyfriend out of the house to instead move your soulmate, best friend in...and you're not a Lesbian. Really? Sun, 18 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-04-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b2dabc31-e030-44ed-8dad-7d90624bec5b 330 Tired of Living a Lie You're an almost 60-year old lady...unmarried...attractive...wealthy...and you've just kicked your boyfriend out of the house to instead move your soulmate, best friend in...and you're not a Lesbian. Really? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:18 yes This is not your grandmothers game of Bingo. There are no lucky charms, no magic troll heads or any other OCD rituals in an attempt to make the next ball be the winning one for you. Instead you have campy, biting queens, a gaggle of straight women at a bridal shower and tweaker waiters. The one thing that does remain the same, however, is that when the bill comes to the table, somehow you still wind up $40 short after everyone puts in their money. Wed, 14 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-04-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast cec0bdd9-9b72-42de-ae4f-b1d39928879b 329 Shake the Troll Head This is not your grandmothers game of Bingo. There are no lucky charms, no magic troll heads or any other OCD rituals in an attempt to make the next ball be the winning one for you. Instead you have campy, biting queens, a gaggle of straight women at a bridal shower and tweaker waiters. The one thing that does remain the same, however, is that when the bill comes to the table, somehow you still wind up $40 short after everyone puts in their money. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:30 yes When you really want to get some in-depth, accurate information on a subject the best person to consult is an expert. Ideally, you'll find someone that has a degree in the subject, someone that has studied it extensively or even someone that has personal experience in the matter. If for some reason you wanted to know all about penises, the last person you'd want to consult is a Lesbian, much less a Gold Star Lesbian. Sun, 11 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-04-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast beac96e0-5b4b-4501-a8c7-9bad72095d63 328 Penisology When you really want to get some in-depth, accurate information on a subject the best person to consult is an expert. Ideally, you'll find someone that has a degree in the subject, someone that has studied it extensively or even someone that has personal experience in the matter. If for some reason you wanted to know all about penises, the last person you'd want to consult is a Lesbian, much less a Gold Star Lesbian. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:46 yes Remember when you were young and your mother told you to never talk to strangers? Now that you're older...nothing's changed. That's still good advice to live by. Otherwise, you may find yourself with a 90-year old schizophrenic stalker that programmed her phone number into your cell phone calling you every night at 2:00am crying. Wed, 7 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-04-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 07cf5175-ee97-44ac-a1d6-3aad15ba5725 327 Creepy Old Lady Remember when you were young and your mother told you to never talk to strangers? Now that you're older...nothing's changed. That's still good advice to live by. Otherwise, you may find yourself with a 90-year old schizophrenic stalker that programmed her phone number into your cell phone calling you every night at 2:00am crying. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 6:35 yes Dinah Shore weekend can be a life-changing experience. Twenty thousand women descend on Palm Springs for a weekend of partying by the pool, lying naked in sun and cheating on their girlfriend. Others show up to see their favorite golfers in action, but leave realizing they really like naked women with fake breasts instead. Sun, 4 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-04-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast b42ac6c6-8a5e-4111-8060-df65641f61f4 326 Dinah Candy Dinah Shore weekend can be a life-changing experience. Twenty thousand women descend on Palm Springs for a weekend of partying by the pool, lying naked in sun and cheating on their girlfriend. Others show up to see their favorite golfers in action, but leave realizing they really like naked women with fake breasts instead. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:42 yes Just because you're a big ol' Homo it doesn't mean that you can't have straight friends. Once you open your mind and get to know some straight people you'll realize they're just like us. They drive regular cars, they show up at Weight Watchers and they pick the toe fungus out of their toenails just like everyone else. Sun, 28 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-03-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast d7ebdc86-912f-4451-bc61-fb18f0286a03 325 Straight Friends Just because you're a big ol' Homo it doesn't mean that you can't have straight friends. Once you open your mind and get to know some straight people you'll realize they're just like us. They drive regular cars, they show up at Weight Watchers and they pick the toe fungus out of their toenails just like everyone else. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:15 yes Older and more mature Lesbians have a lot of experience and knowledge to pass on to today's younger generation of LGBT youth. It's time we reached out to support the younger generations that are just coming out of the closet and are trying to find their way around in a predominantly straight world. Just remember that there are boundaries, and when we say "reach out", we don't necessarily mean that literally...pedophile. Thu, 25 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-03-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7123deed-3760-454a-bdff-636bf1e509a3 324 Lips of Steel Older and more mature Lesbians have a lot of experience and knowledge to pass on to today's younger generation of LGBT youth. It's time we reached out to support the younger generations that are just coming out of the closet and are trying to find their way around in a predominantly straight world. Just remember that there are boundaries, and when we say "reach out", we don't necessarily mean that literally...pedophile. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:34 yes Taking a plane anywhere today can be fraught with perils. You may get stuck on the tarmac for sixteen hours, you might get a blanket with head lice in it, you might be sitting on a seat with bedbugs or you might be sitting next to someone that brought a tuna fish sandwich on board. With all that to worry about, at least you don't have to worry about the horror of being served airplane food any longer. Sun, 21 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-03-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast e9257bf5-fc73-4c77-b902-b50d751e25e4 323 Jihad Dyke Taking a plane anywhere today can be fraught with perils. You may get stuck on the tarmac for sixteen hours, you might get a blanket with head lice in it, you might be sitting on a seat with bedbugs or you might be sitting next to someone that brought a tuna fish sandwich on board. With all that to worry about, at least you don't have to worry about the horror of being served airplane food any longer. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:23 yes It's never too early to give your kids a good education about what it will be like to enter the working world. If you're a 911 operator, an air traffic controller, or a semi-truck driver, there's no better time to get your kid acquainted with what you do every day at work. So, put them right behind the wheel, let them land planes and let them take the next emergency call to deliver a baby. Wed, 17 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-03-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 80803390-317e-11df-9aae-0800200c9a66 322 Kids at Work It's never too early to give your kids a good education about what it will be like to enter the working world. If you're a 911 operator, an air traffic controller, or a semi-truck driver, there's no better time to get your kid acquainted with what you do every day at work. So, put them right behind the wheel, let them land planes and let them take the next emergency call to deliver a baby. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 9:49 yes If you've been missing the days of lusting over your Lesbian gym teacher in high school...then it's time to join the gym again! Make sure you sign up for the workout lessons with the hot Lesbian trainer who will make your legs "burn". Hopefully, everyone will get sweaty enough for a post-workout shower. Hot. Sun, 14 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-03-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast f72fc6b3-8863-445c-968c-da019f0d1bec 321 Veal If you've been missing the days of lusting over your Lesbian gym teacher in high school...then it's time to join the gym again! Make sure you sign up for the workout lessons with the hot Lesbian trainer who will make your legs "burn". Hopefully, everyone will get sweaty enough for a post-workout shower. Hot. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:12 yes With age comes wisdom. When you're young you might think that a woman with two vaginas sounds like a rockin' good time. As you get older, however, you start to think about the down side of having two vaginas. Not only will you have permanent hand cramps and a swollen tongue trying to get her off, but you'll have to spend twice as much on menstrual supplies and you'll have to protect yourself from two bouts of PMS every single month. Wed, 3 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-03-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast CY044843F-6815-42F8-66T5-3A985679BE7Q 320 Double Double With age comes wisdom. When you're young you might think that a woman with two vaginas sounds like a rockin' good time. As you get older, however, you start to think about the down side of having two vaginas. Not only will you have permanent hand cramps and a swollen tongue trying to get her off, but you'll have to spend twice as much on menstrual supplies and you'll have to protect yourself from two bouts of PMS every single month. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:59 yes Gay Pride season is right around the corner, which means that it's never too early to start thinking about having your own money-making booth that you can travel with to Pride Festivals across the country to earn a little extra cash. To really succeed, however, you'll need something unique that will set you apart from the competition. This year, leave the rainbow bracelets behind and get ready to Vajazzle. Sun, 28 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-02-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 8J824653F-6815-42F8-66T5-32A45679BE7E 319 Vajazzle Gay Pride season is right around the corner, which means that it's never too early to start thinking about having your own money-making booth that you can travel with to Pride Festivals across the country to earn a little extra cash. To really succeed, however, you'll need something unique that will set you apart from the competition. This year, leave the rainbow bracelets behind and get ready to Vajazzle. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:24 yes Going on a cruise can be a good time even if you never get off the boat but to get the most out of your trip you'll definitely want to schedule some interesting shore excursions. Just make sure that you buy your from a reputable company so that you don't get ripped off. Otherwise, instead of sledding with the huskies across the frozen tundra, you could be cuddling with a pack of mongrels from the pound with blue contacts in their eyes. Wed, 24 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-02-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast A7824653F-1815-49F8-66T5-3C64567DBE7E 318 Miss Alaska Going on a cruise can be a good time even if you never get off the boat but to get the most out of your trip you'll definitely want to schedule some interesting shore excursions. Just make sure that you buy your from a reputable company so that you don't get ripped off. Otherwise, instead of sledding with the huskies across the frozen tundra, you could be cuddling with a pack of mongrels from the pound with blue contacts in their eyes. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:47 yes When you go out to the club to go dancing, you definitely don't want to leave home without your Gaydar and a fresh set of batteries. Put that in your left pocket and then put your Stripper-radar in your right pocket. These days it's not enough to be able to pick out the strippers by their heels alone. Sun, 21 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-02-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 7F97685F-1815-49F8-86B5-3C62267DBE7E 317 The Evening News These days it take a lot more skill to be a newscaster than just being able to be able to read the stories on the Teleprompter. These days you not only need to pick out your own clothes, but you also need to be able to annunciate properly. You have to make sure that when you're saying "horseshoes" that someone doesn't think you're saying "whore shoes". 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:58 yes These days it take a lot more skill to be a newscaster than just being able to be able to read the stories on the Teleprompter. These days you not only need to pick out your own clothes, but you also need to be able to annunciate properly. You have to make sure that when you're saying "horseshoes" that someone doesn't think you're saying "whore shoes". Mon, 15 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-02-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 0A97685F-1256-49F8-86B5-3C62084DBE7E 316 Bambi's Birthday When you go out to the club to go dancing, you definitely don't want to leave home without your Gaydar and a fresh set of batteries. Put that in your left pocket and then put your Stripper-radar in your right pocket. These days it's not enough to be able to pick out the strippers by their heels alone. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:16 yes Everyone enjoys some good bathroom reading now and again. Just don't be alarmed if you're sitting down at the crapper and you see that your wife has lovingly placed the latest issue of "Divorce Magazine" on the top of your reading pile. I'm sure she meant nothing by it. Wed, 10 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-02-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 4F151D2B-52EE-4F15-B201-CF04D3D827AC 315 Bathroom Reading Everyone enjoys some good bathroom reading now and again. Just don't be alarmed if you're sitting down at the crapper and you see that your wife has lovingly placed the latest issue of "Divorce Magazine" on the top of your reading pile. I'm sure she meant nothing by it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 10:00 yes Being a good writer takes a lot of creativity, hours of time and a ton of hard work. You have to think about the plot line, character development and all the details that keep readers interested enough to continue turning the pages. It's not a skill that you are born with or that you can learn overnight. Dashing your hopes of becoming famous, however, takes only a single moment of criticism from someone that doesn't even like to read. Sun, 07 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-02-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast AE2F47C0-B69E-4FFB-BE1E-1797FBAC50F8 314 The Great Big Book Being a good writer takes a lot of creativity, hours of time and a ton of hard work. You have to think about the plot line, character development and all the details that keep readers interested enough to continue turning the pages. It's not a skill that you are born with or that you can learn overnight. Dashing your hopes of becoming famous, however, takes only a single moment of criticism from someone that doesn't even like to read. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 11:18 yes According to the National Institute of Health, approximately 5% of people will develop a chronic phobia in their lifetime. That number could be understated, however. The NIH may not be taking into account the specific phobias that plague the LGBT community. Simply by counting the one most common affliction, Exophobia - the fear of exes, that number could rise to more than 50%. Wed, 03 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-02-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 15CF1ECA-2CED-4AFB-8646-17D9B5573B17 313 Heterophobia According to the National Institute of Health, approximately 5% of people will develop a chronic phobia in their lifetime. That number could be understated, however. The NIH may not be taking into account the specific phobias that plague the LGBT community. Simply by counting the one most common affliction, Exophobia - the fear of exes, that number could rise to more than 50%. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:42 yes Lesbians share a deep and rich history that goes way back to the beginning of time. Unfortunately, you won't find too much about the heroines of yesteryear in today's history books. That's why it's important for us as Lesbians to carry on sharing our own oral history so that these larger than life figures of the past will never be forgotten. After all, it's our civic responsibility to make sure we never forget who invented the Mullet. Sun, 31 Jan 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-01-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast F7961A6A-3764-4FEA-8363-A3BFA5BF883D 312 Lesbian Herstory Tour Lesbians share a deep and rich history that goes way back to the beginning of time. Unfortunately, you won't find too much about the heroines of yesteryear in today's history books. That's why it's important for us as Lesbians to carry on sharing our own oral history so that these larger than life figures of the past will never be forgotten. After all, it's our civic responsibility to make sure we never forget who invented the Mullet. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:58 yes Let's stand up and be counted! It's that time of the decade when Roxanne tries to find out which zip code...or country...has the largest number of cute Lesbians. She claims it's not a "dating service", but she sure has a lot of questions about you, your exes and your availability for a new relationship. Print out the survey and send your responses to Roxanne@2Homos.com Mon, 25 Jan 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-01-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast F6EE5EDF-6F24-44FA-9D8C-64519954696C 311 Lesbian Census Let's stand up and be counted! It's that time of the decade when Roxanne tries to find out which zip code...or country...has the largest number of cute Lesbians. She claims it's not a "dating service", but she sure has a lot of questions about you, your exes and your availability for a new relationship. Print out the survey and send your responses to Roxanne@2Homos.com 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 13:16 yes It's a jungle out there. Before you go out on a hunting expedition for your next future "ex", make sure you take all the necessary precautions. Bring a large rifle, some thigh-high boots and a large bottle of snake repellent. It's always useful to bring a net and a big bag, too, just in case you need to tie up and carry back your prey. Wed, 20 Jan 2010 00:00:00 -0800 http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-01-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast E8B5F5B8-6046-4AAC-8DCA-8F57D6293441 310 Snake Bite It's a jungle out there. Before you go out on a hunting expedition for your next future "ex", make sure you take all the necessary precautions. Bring a large rifle, some thigh-high boots and a large bottle of snake repellent. It's always useful to bring a net and a big bag, too, just in case you need to tie up and carry back your prey. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:27 yes Sometimes it seems that your Gaydar is just not working properly. You encounter Lesbians and nothing happens, you see Gay men and there are no bells...something is just not right. If that's happening to you, it might just mean that it's time to replace the batteries in your Gaydar. Just to be safe, you may as well replace the batteries in the Crazy Meter, too. You just never know... 17 Jan 2010 15:05:51 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-01-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast CCAA40A3-D2C7-430B-950A-EE6AF6B1E3FA 309 Walk On By Sometimes it seems that your Gaydar is just not working properly. You encounter Lesbians and nothing happens, you see Gay men and there are no bells...something is just not right. If that's happening to you, it might just mean that it's time to replace the batteries in your Gaydar. Just to be safe, you may as well replace the batteries in the Crazy Meter, too. You just never know... 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:06 yes Scientists have very specific techniques they use when examining foreign substances for the first time. They never stick their nose in it and take a direct whiff and they never touch it to take a taste of it until they know wether or not the substance is safe. You never know if what you're examining might be what the dog excreted from its anal glands earlier that day. 13 Jan 2010 15:05:51 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-01-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast BCCDE217-B3BF-4F49-BAA1-A75405AE31E9 308 Miss Communication Scientists have very specific techniques they use when examining foreign substances for the first time. They never stick their nose in it and take a direct whiff and they never touch it to take a taste of it until they know wether or not the substance is safe. You never know if what you're examining might be what the dog excreted from its anal glands earlier that day. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 14:03 yes The Sims has always been a Gay friendly game. You can create same sex couples, have them kiss and be affectionate with each other, and even live together. If you've ever played the game, you're familiar with the unique brand of mumble-speak Sims use to communicate with each other. What you may not have known is that some of the Sims have left the game and are now working at CVS Pharmacy. There's a reason some people never leave the house. 6 Jan 2010 15:05:51 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-01-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast BC495284-347C-4D31-AF56-082EE8A0DE3F 307 Mumblina The Sims has always been a Gay friendly game. You can create same sex couples, have them kiss and be affectionate with each other, and even live together. If you've ever played the game, you're familiar with the unique brand of mumble-speak Sims use to communicate with each other. What you may not have known is that some of the Sims have left the game and are now working at CVS Pharmacy. There's a reason some people never leave the house. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 16:32 yes Learning institutions should be safe and protected environments where everyone is free to learn. Within those austere walls it's completely inappropriate for a teacher to even consider having sex with a student. The rules, however, may not be so clear for the teachers when it comes to having sex with each other. Either way, you'd at least think they would have enough common sense to lock the classroom door before taking their clothes off. 4 Jan 2010 01:32:35 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2010-01-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast, lesbian podcast 99E00F40-9443-4E1B-B133-EA205656BF5F 306 Hot For Teacher Learning institutions should be safe and protected environments where everyone is free to learn. Within those austere walls it's completely inappropriate for a teacher to even consider having sex with a student. The rules, however, may not be so clear for the teachers when it comes to having sex with each other. Either way, you'd at least think they would have enough common sense to lock the classroom door before taking their clothes off. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos, lesbian podcast, gay podcast 12:18 yes First time jitters are natural the first time you're with a woman. You may be confused about what to do once you get into that situation, you may be nervous that you won't know how to please her, and you definitely don't want to look stupid once her clothes come off. As usual we've got some good advice for you that includes not shaving her entire body in the bathtub on the first date. 31 Dec 2009 01:32:35 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast CEA99EE1-37A0-4ED4-B4F5-1AD9A0B4A531 305 First Time Etiquette First time jitters are natural the first time you're with a woman. You may be confused about what to do once you get into that situation, you may be nervous that you won't know how to please her, and you definitely don't want to look stupid once her clothes come off. As usual we've got some good advice for you that includes not shaving her entire body in the bathtub on the first date. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:14 yes If your lady has been cranky for no reason lately, your first reaction may be that she is PMS'ing...again. Maybe she's not getting enough sleep, maybe she's not getting enough sex or maybe she's just a plain old bitch. Once you get beyond all of that, there may actually be a medical reason for her short temper. It could be that she is low on electrolytes or possibly her iron levels are deficient. Time for a doctor check-up. 28 Dec 2009 04:32:35 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast CEA99EE1-28E0-4ED4-B4F5-1AD9A0A6A531 304 Cranky For a Reason If your lady has been cranky for no reason lately, your first reaction may be that she is PMS'ing...again. Maybe she's not getting enough sleep, maybe she's not getting enough sex or maybe she's just a plain old bitch. Once you get beyond all of that, there may actually be a medical reason for her short temper. It could be that she is low on electrolytes or possibly her iron levels are deficient. Time for a doctor check-up. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:58 yes Young Lesbians everywhere need to beware. There are straight women on the prowl looking to prey on susceptible young Lesbians by luring them into hot, smokin' extramarital affairs and relationships without disclosing the whole truth - that they have a husband at home! Add straight women to the list of predators that nice young ladies need to watch out for. 24 Dec 2009 04:32:35 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast CEA56EE1-28E0-4ED4-B4F5-1AD9A0A6A687 303 Lesbo Curious Young Lesbians everywhere need to beware. There are straight women on the prowl looking to prey on susceptible young Lesbians by luring them into hot, smokin' extramarital affairs and relationships without disclosing the whole truth - that they have a husband at home! Add straight women to the list of predators that nice young ladies need to watch out for. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 16:13 yes It's the time of year for giving, so why not give something to yourself? It's OK if you take gift cards from needy children, smoke crack with funds from the city you work for, or buy prostitutes by using your government spending account. It's only when you get a blow job at your place of work that it becomes an issue...even if you're multi-tasking and getting work done at the same time. 21 Dec 2009 04:32:35 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast CEA27EE1-28E0-4ED4-B4F5-9ED9A0A6A687 302 Robbin' Hood It's the time of year for giving, so why not give something to yourself? It's OK if you take gift cards from needy children, smoke crack with funds from the city you work for, or buy prostitutes by using your government spending account. It's only when you get a blow job at your place of work that it becomes an issue...even if you're multi-tasking and getting work done at the same time. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:29 yes There's more than one way to stuff your stocking this holiday season, but we'd be remiss if we didn't give you our rundown of great gift ideas for friends, loved ones and even those you hate. We've got something for everyone on your list whether they've been naughty, nice or just plain nasty. Break out that credit card and get ready to revive the economy. 16 Dec 2009 04:32:35 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 21B9E859-A16E-4581-9F73-DF03CE2AB6BB 301 Stocking Stuffer There's more than one way to stuff your stocking this holiday season, but we'd be remiss if we didn't give you our rundown of great gift ideas for friends, loved ones and even those you hate. We've got something for everyone on your list whether they've been naughty, nice or just plain nasty. Break out that credit card and get ready to revive the economy. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:07 yes It's not that Lesbians don't want attractive bras to wear. We just need them to be attractive, yet still functional. Sports bras are functional, but not necessarily attractive. 18-hour bras are functional, but not necessarily attractive. Worst of all, you don't want to pick up a woman you think is "double D" who happens to really be a "nearly A" when you get her home. 12 Dec 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 09187DF0-3725-4EA8-90A8-66F5FD7E3205 300 Lesbian Bra Shop It's not that Lesbians don't want attractive bras to wear. We just need them to be attractive, yet still functional. Sports bras are functional, but not necessarily attractive. 18-hour bras are functional, but not necessarily attractive. Worst of all, you don't want to pick up a woman you think is "double D" who happens to really be a "nearly A" when you get her home. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:12 yes Good fences make good neighbors. It also helps to have a fence that's six-feet tall so you don't ever have to talk to your neighbors or interact with them. Best of all, it also helps maintain the mystery about who your neighbors really are. That way you'll never have to know that the Steppford Wife next door sells Botox for a living and has man-voice. 8 Dec 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast AAC1B9C3-A6EB-4959-B9C3-8DC6FF16B15E 299 Pissing Contest Good fences make good neighbors. It also helps to have a fence that's six-feet tall so you don't ever have to talk to your neighbors or interact with them. Best of all, it also helps maintain the mystery about who your neighbors really are. That way you'll never have to know that the Steppford Wife next door sells Botox for a living and has man-voice. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:25 yes The secret to a long-lasting, fulfilling relationship is to make sure that both partners get their needs fulfilled on a regular basis. Next time your partner wants to do something that you hate doing, simply send them on a play date with a friend and you won't have to deal with it. Then you can stay home and fall in love with fake characters in a video game all by yourself. 5 Dec 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 2ECD6292-CEAB-448C-9EE0-CA226DE18028 298 Gay Play Date The secret to a long-lasting, fulfilling relationship is to make sure that both partners get their needs fulfilled on a regular basis. Next time your partner wants to do something that you hate doing, simply send them on a play date with a friend and you won't have to deal with it. Then you can stay home and fall in love with fake characters in a video game all by yourself. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:50 yes December 1, 1988 marked the first official World AIDS Day, but it's a pandemic that we have all been living with for more than 25 years. We may have drugs and cocktails that help slow down and even reverse the effects, but they're not accessible, affordable or tolerable for everyone that needs them world-wide. The long-term affects are also unclear. This fight is far from over, so speak up, speak out, communicate with your partner and make sure you're protected. 1 Dec 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-12-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast E52F41E0-D5DF-43F5-BD99-6BB6B6852F35 297 Not Over Yet December 1, 1988 marked the first official World AIDS Day, but it's a pandemic that we have all been living with for more than 25 years. We may have drugs and cocktails that help slow down and even reverse the effects, but they're not accessible, affordable or tolerable for everyone that needs them world-wide. The long-term affects are also unclear. This fight is far from over, so speak up, speak out, communicate with your partner and make sure you're protected. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:49 yes Adults are not that much different from babies. When you want to get a baby to stop crying, you try to divert their attention to something else. Maybe it's food, a different toy or a funny face that you make. When Lesbians start getting into a heated conversation, simply try pointing out a nice looking lady with big boobs. That should do the trick and get everyone into a happier place. 29 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B0D217FE-321F-4F2D-8EA7-552A92A547DD 296 Change the Subject Adults are not that much different from babies. When you want to get a baby to stop crying, you try to divert their attention to something else. Maybe it's food, a different toy or a funny face that you make. When Lesbians start getting into a heated conversation, simply try pointing out a nice looking lady with big boobs. That should do the trick and get everyone into a happier place. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 08:06 yes As a parent it's important to keep track of who your kids are hanging out with, what kind of music they're into and what bad things they might be getting up to. Adults should be good role models for their children by exhibiting appropriate behavior at all times. Encouraging 10-year olds to share ring tones with bad words and sexual references might not be a good example of being a mature adult role model. 27 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast F9FB21CF-7EFF-401E-B7B0-C2958F32712F 295 Mature Adults As a parent it's important to keep track of who your kids are hanging out with, what kind of music they're into and what bad things they might be getting up to. Adults should be good role models for their children by exhibiting appropriate behavior at all times. Encouraging 10-year olds to share ring tones with bad words and sexual references might not be a good example of being a mature adult role model. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:10 yes Next time you're online looking for your new ex-wife at one of the Lesbian dating sites, you may want to update your profile about what you're looking for in a lady. Add that you're looking for someone who is a breast technician at a mammogram center. This is someone that fondles breasts for a living, they understand the importance of warm hands, and they've got a lot of experience picking up and fondling all kinds of breasts. That's what they do for a living....so they get a lot of practice. 22 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0F0EC7C9-ACAF-4400-AC59-BAC69D92749F 294 Nipple Finder Next time you're online looking for your new ex-wife at one of the Lesbian dating sites, you may want to update your profile about what you're looking for in a lady. Add that you're looking for someone who is a breast technician at a mammogram center. This is someone that fondles breasts for a living, they understand the importance of warm hands, and they've got a lot of experience picking up and fondling all kinds of breasts. That's what they do for a living....so they get a lot of practice. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:31 yes Once the relationship has ended and it's time to dispose of all those fun sex toys you acquired over the week that your latest long-term relationship lasted, it's important to know how to dispose of your toys properly. If you can't donate your used toys to the local Goodwill, you can always spread some good will of your own by depositing them in your neighbors' mailboxes. Just make sure they don't have a dog that likes to chew things. 18 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 751BD9B8-D218-4B43-A76E-B8D74C944C3D 293 Dispose of Properly Once the relationship has ended and it's time to dispose of all those fun sex toys you acquired over the week that your latest long-term relationship lasted, it's important to know how to dispose of your toys properly. If you can't donate your used toys to the local Goodwill, you can always spread some good will of your own by depositing them in your neighbors' mailboxes. Just make sure they don't have a dog that likes to chew things. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:41 yes Good friends are always there when you need them, but it's your best friends that you can really count on to tell you all about the best sex toys to use with your new girlfriend. When you make that new purchase, just try not to leave it at your parent's house when you spend the night. Even if they don't use it...just the thought that they touch it is enough to throw it right into the trash. 15 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast C255513D-F6DE-4AD4-AE5A-EC136D502C8D 292 Tongue Joy Good friends are always there when you need them, but it's your best friends that you can really count on to tell you all about the best sex toys to use with your new girlfriend. When you make that new purchase, just try not to leave it at your parent's house when you spend the night. Even if they don't use it...just the thought that they touch it is enough to throw it right into the trash. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 16:27 yes Today's parents think they're internet savvy and that they know where their kids are going on the internet. Well...it turns out your kids really are smarter than you. They know how to log on to your computer, they know how to erase their browsing history and they know all your passwords, too. Maybe next time you'll choose a password that's not the name of your favorite pet. 11 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 293656D8-C990-43E8-ADA5-248AB68B94B8 291 Your Kids Are Watching Today's parents think they're internet savvy and that they know where their kids are going on the internet. Well...it turns out your kids really are smarter than you. They know how to log on to your computer, they know how to erase their browsing history and they know all your passwords, too. Maybe next time you'll choose a password that's not the name of your favorite pet. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:43 yes In a time before Lesbian bars, before there were Lesbian go-go dancers and before we knew more than a handful of Gay people each....that time was called, high school. Now we have domestic partnerships, we're on our way to a time in the future when Gay marriage will be legal, LGBT people won't feel like second class citizens, and Olivia Cruises will be selling tickets for a trip to the moon. 8 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 8A5DACE4-CE27-45C4-88F8-76EF1DE734F9 290 Lesbians on the Moon In a time before Lesbian bars, before there were Lesbian go-go dancers and before we knew more than a handful of Gay people each....that time was called, high school. Now we have domestic partnerships, we're on our way to a time in the future when Gay marriage will be legal, LGBT people won't feel like second class citizens, and Olivia Cruises will be selling tickets for a trip to the moon. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:25 yes Here's more proof that what happens in Vegas certainly does not stay in Vegas...especially when two Homos are on the trip. Now the secret is out that you'll find dancers with stripper poles in furry boots at the Hard Rock, there are valets parking cars who are older than 50, you can score less than 80 in bowling and still have a really good game, and it is possible to find bad bread pudding on the Strip. 4 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast C8F365B0-B360-45F5-82CC-036315004CF2 289 Vegas Secrets Here's more proof that what happens in Vegas certainly does not stay in Vegas...especially when two Homos are on the trip. Now the secret is out that you'll find dancers with stripper poles in furry boots at the Hard Rock, there are valets parking cars who are older than 50, you can score less than 80 in bowling and still have a really good game, and it is possible to find bad bread pudding on the Strip. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 34:41 yes There's nothing wrong with dressing up for Halloween, handing out candy and having a little fun. It's when you start offering candy to everyone in the neighborhood, including the parents, that you're starting to cross the line. Thinking that you may decorate the entire house and the whole backyard to become a haunted house for everyone to walk through is really going too far. 1 Nov 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-11-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast ADA52F77-CA28-4719-82C0-312C74D0E905 288 Holiday Countdown There's nothing wrong with dressing up for Halloween, handing out candy and having a little fun. It's when you start offering candy to everyone in the neighborhood, including the parents, that you're starting to cross the line. Thinking that you may decorate the entire house and the whole backyard to become a haunted house for everyone to walk through is really going too far. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:24 yes Today's Lesbians are entirely too busy to be wasting time. We need to make every minute count. As long as you've got a doctor's appointment you may as well have them check your blood pressure, do a full physical and get that pap smear out of the way all at the some time. Don't forget a pair of tassels so that you can make a little extra money on the side while you have your mammogram done. 27 Oct 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-10-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 97C5FA57-7C07-4C01-90EF-7219D7D2F1FF 287 While You're Down There Today's Lesbians are entirely too busy to be wasting time. We need to make every minute count. As long as you've got a doctor's appointment you may as well have them check your blood pressure, do a full physical and get that pap smear out of the way all at the some time. Don't forget a pair of tassels so that you can make a little extra money on the side while you have your mammogram done. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:37 yes It's not that Lesbians don't like manicures and pedicures, it's just that not everyone wants to get it done in the middle of a straight chick fest. It might be more comfortable to get it done in the Lesbian nail salon where they have a refrigerator full of beer, the game is being shown on a giant flat-screen TV, the latest issue of Curve is available to flip through, and the ladies from Clinique have a booth to show young Femmes how to apply the latest colors for Fall. 24 Oct 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-10-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 49028C9D-EE4E-4EB6-B0ED-8123C9B3D881 286 Straight Chick Fest It's not that Lesbians don't like manicures and pedicures, it's just that not everyone wants to get it done in the middle of a straight chick fest. It might be more comfortable to get it done in the Lesbian nail salon where they have a refrigerator full of beer, the game is being shown on a giant flat-screen TV, the latest issue of Curve is available to flip through, and the ladies from Clinique have a booth to show young Femmes how to apply the latest colors for Fall. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:49 yes It may not be immediately obvious, but "help" really is a four-letter word. "Help" should not cost you extra money, require more of your time than if you were to do something yourself, or aggravate you to the point where you need pills to keep you calm. Next time someone tries to help you...help yourself instead and just say, "no". 19 Oct 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-10-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast AF149DA3-F2EF-479A-A2D7-08FC0A67C075 285 Just Trying to Help It may not be immediately obvious, but "help" really is a four-letter word. "Help" should not cost you extra money, require more of your time than if you were to do something yourself, or aggravate you to the point where you need pills to keep you calm. Next time someone tries to help you...help yourself instead and just say, "no". 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:18 yes It's creepy enough when you pets are in the same room with you watching while you're having sex, but to have a family member walk in while your ass is up in the air is really embarrassing. It's a good thing your parents don't know how to upload videos to You Tube. Otherwise, you might just be an overnight Internet sensation. 14 Oct 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-10-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B12A5DC5-DD19-47CA-BF64-E8B66F306CF5 284 Sexposed It's creepy enough when you pets are in the same room with you watching while you're having sex, but to have a family member walk in while your ass is up in the air is really embarrassing. It's a good thing your parents don't know how to upload videos to You Tube. Otherwise, you might just be an overnight Internet sensation. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:31 yes Sometimes you just need that little kick start to get yourself motivated to start on a big project such as cleaning up the house. Now there's an answer. Simply tune in to "Hoarders" on A&E Network and you will be filled with the fear, motivation and neuroses to make sure that you clean out every closet, organize every drawer and take all your old clothes and unused household items to the nearest charitable drop off location. 11 Oct 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-10-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B9DC7712-567D-47D1-B2AC-583FA7F1C70C 283 Motivation Sometimes you just need that little kick start to get yourself motivated to start on a big project such as cleaning up the house. Now there's an answer. Simply tune in to "Hoarders" on A&E Network and you will be filled with the fear, motivation and neuroses to make sure that you clean out every closet, organize every drawer and take all your old clothes and unused household items to the nearest charitable drop off location. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:57 yes In tough times it's good to have an entrepreneurial spirit to help kick start the economy once again. The key to success is to find that one unique idea that has a good chance of success. Sponsoring drug dealers near high schools or using condom companies to sponsor school sports teams may not be examples of winning formulas. 3 Oct 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-10-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 53106CCE-D541-40B3-BE97-A83F430FD54C 282 Like a Fart in Church In tough times it's good to have an entrepreneurial spirit to help kick start the economy once again. The key to success is to find that one unique idea that has a good chance of success. Sponsoring drug dealers near high schools or using condom companies to sponsor school sports teams may not be examples of winning formulas. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:43 yes There's nothing like a lazy Sunday afternoon watching football, throwing back a few beers and maybe winning a few dollars in the football pool with your friends. That was until we found Friday night football courtesy of the Lingerie Football League. Make sure you take your heart medication before you tune in. 30 Sep 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-09-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0E878C27-B59B-414A-B530-58C4FF9A6107 281 Pigs There's nothing like a lazy Sunday afternoon watching football, throwing back a few beers and maybe winning a few dollars in the football pool with your friends. That was until we found Friday night football courtesy of the Lingerie Football League. Make sure you take your heart medication before you tune in. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:10 yes Before you go camping, it's a good idea to make a list of the things you'll need. First, make sure you drive your Porsche to the camp ground. Don't forget the beer cups that you can write your name on, the portable Uno game, the travel stripper pole and a couple of Lesbians to take pictures of your camp site when the bear comes to visit. 27 Sep 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-09-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 6C9A0948-5818-40C9-8056-0B3EF4806AD6 280 Ken and Barbie Go Camping Before you go camping, it's a good idea to make a list of the things you'll need. First, make sure you drive your Porsche to the camp ground. Don't forget the beer cups that you can write your name on, the portable Uno game, the travel stripper pole and a couple of Lesbians to take pictures of your camp site when the bear comes to visit. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 18:58 yes You know you're an old married Lesbian when to have "fun" you head to the nearest Sears and fantasize about buying new appliances for your home. It might be time to break up and start dating someone 20 years younger who wants to party all night and have sex all day. One thing is for sure...she'll be more expensive than the shopping trip to Sears. 23 Sep 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-09-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0A2B2525-FE3D-43F9-A565-C5ED75583D8D 279 Losing Track of Time You know you're an old married Lesbian when to have "fun" you head to the nearest Sears and fantasize about buying new appliances for your home. It might be time to break up and start dating someone 20 years younger who wants to party all night and have sex all day. One thing is for sure...she'll be more expensive than the shopping trip to Sears. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:47 yes Sitting through an entire wedding can be a long, drawn out and painful experience...even if it's your best friend getting married. To help make the time go by quicker, why not give yourself a sense of purpose and come prepared with a special mission of your own. Chat up every hot girl at the wedding reception and try to find single lady to hook up with your neurologist. 20 Sep 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-09-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 56E9EE14-BFB2-44EA-ACAF-5D17820C814D 278 Maid of Honor Sitting through an entire wedding can be a long, drawn out and painful experience...even if it's your best friend getting married. To help make the time go by quicker, why not give yourself a sense of purpose and come prepared with a special mission of your own. Chat up every hot girl at the wedding reception and try to find single lady to hook up with your neurologist. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:43 yes This Fall, Lesbians all over the world will be making a striking fashion statement as they dig deep into their closets to pull out those old fanny packs we all used to wear back in the 80's. Now you can be both fashionable and sensible as you discretely carry all those Lesbian necessities - your wallet, your hairbrush, your lip balm and your car keys. Don't forget to tuck in a few cherry dental dams for good measure. 10 Sep 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-09-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 5BE09288-5611-4B5B-A988-AA91C86B9990 277 Fanny Pack Couture This Fall, Lesbians all over the world will be making a striking fashion statement as they dig deep into their closets to pull out those old fanny packs we all used to wear back in the 80's. Now you can be both fashionable and sensible as you discretely carry all those Lesbian necessities - your wallet, your hairbrush, your lip balm and your car keys. Don't forget to tuck in a few cherry dental dams for good measure. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:04 yes The LA County Fair is not any different from a country fair you'd find anywhere in the U.S. We have animals, carnival rides, cotton candy, silly games and crappy fried food. We also have half naked women walking around in tank tops that are too small for them and daisy dukes that go half way up their asses. The only difference is that in LA you might have to question whether their boobs are real or plastic. 7 Sep 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-09-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 711DAE64-0B17-4877-866D-D03EF04940AC 276 My Fair Lady The LA County Fair is not any different from a country fair you'd find anywhere in the U.S. We have animals, carnival rides, cotton candy, silly games and crappy fried food. We also have half naked women walking around in tank tops that are too small for them and daisy dukes that go half way up their asses. The only difference is that in LA you might have to question whether their boobs are real or plastic. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:20 yes In this economy it's important to make sure you come to a job interview with your "A" game. You might only get one shot at landing that important job, so make sure you're ready. A few tips to keep in mind - take a shower before you go, don't show up in your sweatpants, wear some deodorant, and tits out is optional...although not always recommended. 2 Sep 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-09-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast A35226CC-21FB-4E40-8D9C-E40D8B043A1C 275 The Job Interview In this economy it's important to make sure you come to a job interview with your "A" game. You might only get one shot at landing that important job, so make sure you're ready. A few tips to keep in mind - take a shower before you go, don't show up in your sweatpants, wear some deodorant, and tits out is optional...although not always recommended. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:25 yes If you don't kiss someone that is standing under mistletoe, it means you will have bad luck for the rest of your life. Whether you believe that superstition or not, it's probably worth taking a chance by walking away if an ugly Lesbian with halitosis is standing under that mistletoe. Having bad luck for the rest of your life just has to be a better outcome. 30 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 668FC3B0-7FB7-4B2D-AF66-5DD45DA7BDA7 247 Banana Boat If you don't kiss someone that is standing under mistletoe, it means you will have bad luck for the rest of your life. Whether you believe that superstition or not, it's probably worth taking a chance by walking away if an ugly Lesbian with halitosis is standing under that mistletoe. Having bad luck for the rest of your life just has to be a better outcome. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:18 yes It's never easy to ask for help when you're not able to take care of yourself as well as you used to, but if that time ever comes, you may as well do it in the best possible style you can think of. Get the wheelchair with the spinning hubcaps and gold plated rims. Deck it out with Italian leather seats with temperature controlled seat warmers. And, make sure it has a cup holder on the side to hold your diamond encrusted Pimp Cup. 26 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 9A4BBEFA-1E08-4525-8008-D7EF9BEB0196 273 The Real Deal It's never easy to ask for help when you're not able to take care of yourself as well as you used to, but if that time ever comes, you may as well do it in the best possible style you can think of. Get the wheelchair with the spinning hubcaps and gold plated rims. Deck it out with Italian leather seats with temperature controlled seat warmers. And, make sure it has a cup holder on the side to hold your diamond encrusted Pimp Cup. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:13 yes It's not hard to pick up Lesbians once you know the secret. All you need is a cute puppy or a minor sports injury. It doesn't even have to be a real injury. Simply go out with a small cast or a sprained limb wrapped in some gauze, add some crutches for effect, and you're guaranteed to meet the girl of your dreams. 23 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 13E3D75F-2F5A-45F4-84D0-22E446E6AEFB 272 Chick Magnet It's not hard to pick up Lesbians once you know the secret. All you need is a cute puppy or a minor sports injury. It doesn't even have to be a real injury. Simply go out with a small cast or a sprained limb wrapped in some gauze, add some crutches for effect, and you're guaranteed to meet the girl of your dreams. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:14 yes Global warming is a serious issue that will have long-lasting effects on our planet and impact not only our lives, but the lives of our children and grandchildren as well. But, if reducing our carbon footprint means having to ride in crowded buses and trains with sweaty strangers that stink, then it's worth burning fossil fuels for hours a day jammed on the freeway heading back and forth to work alone in your car with the air conditioning cranked all the way up. 19 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast CCF389B0-79AB-4464-87CD-4063BB4C04EA 271 Company of Strangers Global warming is a serious issue that will have long-lasting effects on our planet and impact not only our lives, but the lives of our children and grandchildren as well. But, if reducing our carbon footprint means having to ride in crowded buses and trains with sweaty strangers that stink, then it's worth burning fossil fuels for hours a day jammed on the freeway heading back and forth to work alone in your car with the air conditioning cranked all the way up. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:50 yes As you search for the perfect wife, make sure you keep in mind all the good qualities that make for a long, loving and happy relationship. Try to find someone who is trustworthy, loyal, considerate, generous and fun to be around. Most importantly, make sure she knows how to fix the computers and take care of all the other electronic gadgets in the house. 16 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 1699A653-E3EE-4CA7-8365-73DB476567BC 270 Low Tech As you search for the perfect wife, make sure you keep in mind all the good qualities that make for a long, loving and happy relationship. Try to find someone who is trustworthy, loyal, considerate, generous and fun to be around. Most importantly, make sure she knows how to fix the computers and take care of all the other electronic gadgets in the house. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:14 yes There's a reason why restaurants have signs in their restrooms that insist employees wash their hands before returning to work. It's so that they don't stick their nasty fingers up their asses and then stir your latte with that same finger. If it wasn't a problem....they wouldn't need the signs. 12 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 6E818DC7-82EA-4C17-8D6C-B0C1D3D6CB08 269 Paranoia There's a reason why restaurants have signs in their restrooms that insist employees wash their hands before returning to work. It's so that they don't stick their nasty fingers up their asses and then stir your latte with that same finger. If it wasn't a problem....they wouldn't need the signs. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:19 yes In an ongoing effort for companies to save money and cut back on expenses, live operators are being replaced by automated phone systems. As long as they're going down that path, it's comforting to know that they've put a lot of time and effort into making those automated systems as exasperating and annoying as talking to a real live customer service agent. 8 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 8F796DE2-F677-4A0F-A885-9A22C0CAFA37 268 Automaton In an ongoing effort for companies to save money and cut back on expenses, live operators are being replaced by automated phone systems. As long as they're going down that path, it's comforting to know that they've put a lot of time and effort into making those automated systems as exasperating and annoying as talking to a real live customer service agent. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:28 yes It's a lot of power to wield to be the proud owner of a Va Jay Jay. You have the power to make grown men stop in their tracks cold, to start blathering like idiots, to render them unable to think with anything except the smaller version of themselves between their legs, and to make them do things they might regret for the rest of their lives. What a bitch when they find out you're a big 'ol Homo. 5 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast EA53BA67-CA45-45AC-B830-63E274B76EFE 267 Power of the Va Jay Jay It's a lot of power to wield to be the proud owner of a Va Jay Jay. You have the power to make grown men stop in their tracks cold, to start blathering like idiots, to render them unable to think with anything except the smaller version of themselves between their legs, and to make them do things they might regret for the rest of their lives. What a bitch when they find out you're a big 'ol Homo. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:22 yes Just because you're a Lesbian it doesn't necessarily mean that you don't like penises. Lots of Lesbians enjoy toys and strap-ons shaped like a phallus. It's just that most of them don't want to have one with a man attached to the other side touching them. 2 Aug 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-08-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast A4B14228-E3F2-4057-B9C5-1A617E8B11DF 266 Sophie's Choice Just because you're a Lesbian it doesn't necessarily mean that you don't like penises. Lots of Lesbians enjoy toys and strap-ons shaped like a phallus. It's just that most of them don't want to have one with a man attached to the other side touching them. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:21 yes There are some things you never want to hear come out of your mother or grandmother's mouths. Some of those things might be, "Is that the sex toy shop you go to?", "Do you use the super extra-wide tampons?" and "F@#K you LA". You might just get lucky and actually hear all those things in one single week. Time to got to Vegas. 29 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast DB3F3152-4617-4142-92A4-09A863F35BE8 265 F.U. LA There are some things you never want to hear come out of your mother or grandmother's mouths. Some of those things might be, "Is that the sex toy shop you go to?", "Do you use the super extra-wide tampons?" and "F@#K you LA". You might just get lucky and actually hear all those things in one single week. Time to got to Vegas. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:33 yes The $80 you just spent for lunch at a trendy new West Hollywood restaurant won't be near enough to make up for the amount of business they'll now lose by having the Lesbian Beverly Hillbillies show up during prime time. The restaurant just fell off Paris Hilton's "to do" list for this week. 26 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 75CD1921-82B1-4A7C-9327-1BB8131911E4 264 Lesbian Beverly Hillbillies The $80 you just spent for lunch at a trendy new West Hollywood restaurant won't be near enough to make up for the amount of business they'll now lose by having the Lesbian Beverly Hillbillies show up during prime time. The restaurant just fell off Paris Hilton's "to do" list for this week. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:19 yes Since the sanctity of marriage is so important, it's time for straight couples to take some responsibility in this area. From now on, every time a straight couple gets divorced, 10 Gay couples will be allowed to get married. If one commits adultery, that means 20 Gay couples can get married. And, for each politician that has an affair, that automatically gives 100 Gay couples the opportunity to get married. 19 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast F8E21EB1-6B11-4934-9EA9-F0BDE8D9D5C4 263 Sanctity of Marriage Since the sanctity of marriage is so important, it's time for straight couples to take some responsibility in this area. From now on, every time a straight couple gets divorced, 10 Gay couples will be allowed to get married. If one commits adultery, that means 20 Gay couples can get married. And, for each politician that has an affair, that automatically gives 100 Gay couples the opportunity to get married. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:17 yes Let's face it...you want your house to look good for the holidays, but if you do it yourself it will be the home decorating equivalent of "Dyke in a dress". Fortunately for you there's still plenty of time to hire a couple of Gay men to get it done right. Not only will your house make it on to the cover of "House Beautiful", but you won't have to worry about taking down the decorations after the holiday either. 15 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 4F90C15A-EDF7-40D3-AEA7-A7BA2A9AD0C8 262 Hoarders Let's face it...you want your house to look good for the holidays, but if you do it yourself it will be the home decorating equivalent of "Dyke in a dress". Fortunately for you there's still plenty of time to hire a couple of Gay men to get it done right. Not only will your house make it on to the cover of "House Beautiful", but you won't have to worry about taking down the decorations after the holiday either. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:27 yes Straight people are looking at the issue of Gay marriage all wrong. The money spent on Gay weddings, including the wedding planners, the party decorations, the tux and gown rentals, flowers, cakes and honeymoons alone are enough to bring this country out of the worst recession we've had in more than 50 years. Throw in the amount of money that will also be made on divorces, and the government will in the black in no time. 12 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B3D6B339-D0F2-4511-9443-58640DEE95A7 261 Crazy in Love Straight people are looking at the issue of Gay marriage all wrong. The money spent on Gay weddings, including the wedding planners, the party decorations, the tux and gown rentals, flowers, cakes and honeymoons alone are enough to bring this country out of the worst recession we've had in more than 50 years. Throw in the amount of money that will also be made on divorces, and the government will in the black in no time. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:46 yes After you've tried everything possible with western medicine, it's time to give some alternative techniques a try. Instead of spending tons of money on an acupuncturist, why not just grab a friend and do it yourself? Download a license from the internet, pick out some needles from your mom's sewing kit, get a 9-volt battery from the junk drawer, a crappy CD player and a nice heat lamp at Homo Depot. You're all set. 9 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0D298969-C540-4406-B6C1-F47A5DD64565 260 Little Pricks After you've tried everything possible with western medicine, it's time to give some alternative techniques a try. Instead of spending tons of money on an acupuncturist, why not just grab a friend and do it yourself? Download a license from the internet, pick out some needles from your mom's sewing kit, get a 9-volt battery from the junk drawer, a crappy CD player and a nice heat lamp at Homo Depot. You're all set. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:56 yes One man's trash is another man's treasure. Even if it's a high heel shoe chair with leopard print upholstery, there is someone out there who simply must have it for their home. It doesn't matter if the thing has been on the showroom floor for the last five years, if it's been faded by the sun by sitting out on display or if it smells like piss because a dog peed on it when it went by on a walk. 6 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 2F49B553-E728-4BE3-AD80-F8E1B50904E4 259 No Refunds One man's trash is another man's treasure. Even if it's a high heel shoe chair with leopard print upholstery, there is someone out there who simply must have it for their home. It doesn't matter if the thing has been on the showroom floor for the last five years, if it's been faded by the sun by sitting out on display or if it smells like piss because a dog peed on it when it went by on a walk. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:52 yes Having any kind of surgical procedure is serious business. It's not the time for your doctor to be holding a knife cutting you open and talking about what he watched on TV last night, whether or not Michael Jackson was wearing wigs or how hot it's going to be this weekend. The only thing worse would be if he got on Twitter and started giving the play by play. 1 Jul 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-07-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 41BB0968-9C22-4132-BC5B-74B3647E5F9E 258 Cut It Out Having any kind of surgical procedure is serious business. It's not the time for your doctor to be holding a knife cutting you open and talking about what he watched on TV last night, whether or not Michael Jackson was wearing wigs or how hot it's going to be this weekend. The only thing worse would be if he got on Twitter and started giving the play by play. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:23 yes The statistics show that 9 out of every 10 people are straight, which makes it likely that every one of knows at least one person in our lives that is straight. It's time for all of us to start accepting their cultural differences, to try to understand their lifestyle and to stop referring to their life-partners as their "special friend" at family gatherings. Most importantly, let's stop embarrassing them by asking what it is that straight people do in bed. 28 Jun 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-06-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 011626DD-30D2-4FF4-8EBB-B141BBFCDA40 257 Bigots The statistics show that 9 out of every 10 people are straight, which makes it likely that every one of knows at least one person in our lives that is straight. It's time for all of us to start accepting their cultural differences, to try to understand their lifestyle and to stop referring to their life-partners as their "special friend" at family gatherings. Most importantly, let's stop embarrassing them by asking what it is that straight people do in bed. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:25 yes Nothing says, "I love you" like shopping generic. Next time you hit the grocery store don't forget to pick up the generic six-pack of beer in the white can with nothing, but the word "beer" on it, the generic cigarettes and the generic tampons. She couldn't love you more, unless you also brought home the generic green beans. 24 Jun 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-06-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B8D0702F-EBEB-4820-A7D2-EE628BACD948 256 Generic Brand Shopping Nothing says, "I love you" like shopping generic. Next time you hit the grocery store don't forget to pick up the generic six-pack of beer in the white can with nothing, but the word "beer" on it, the generic cigarettes and the generic tampons. She couldn't love you more, unless you also brought home the generic green beans. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:53 yes A major recession across the country, 11% unemployment in California, teachers getting laid off because of budget cuts and more people struggling to make ends meet since the Great Depression.... Still, the City of Los Angeles can somehow find $2 million dollars to throw a parade to celebrate a basketball team. Of course if the Laker Girls showed up in thongs, dancing on fire engines with stripper poles attached to them none of us would have complained no matter what they paid. 21 Jun 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-06-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast ED0B4E2A-6FA4-48F4-8741-A628E8D80A5D 255 Laker Girls in Thongs A major recession across the country, 11% unemployment in California, teachers getting laid off because of budget cuts and more people struggling to make ends meet since the Great Depression.... Still, the City of Los Angeles can somehow find $2 million dollars to throw a parade to celebrate a basketball team. Of course if the Laker Girls showed up in thongs, dancing on fire engines with stripper poles attached to them none of us would have complained no matter what they paid. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:34 yes Nothing says sexy like a set of mismatched bra and panties, unless that same sexy set has a hole the size of a quarter in it. Instead of sitting there laughing and shaming your partner, why not turn it into a sexy shopping date where you pick out a few new sets of lingerie together? Or, you can just shame her even more by tossing her in the car, dropping her off at the store and making her buy it herself. 18 Jun 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-06-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 450AB1B0-B39E-429E-91E0-F7162227E21D 254 Lesbian Lingerie Chic Nothing says sexy like a set of mismatched bra and panties, unless that same sexy set has a hole the size of a quarter in it. Instead of sitting there laughing and shaming your partner, why not turn it into a sexy shopping date where you pick out a few new sets of lingerie together? Or, you can just shame her even more by tossing her in the car, dropping her off at the store and making her buy it herself. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:40 yes There comes a time in every relationship when the best thing to do to maintain harmony is to suck it up and do something you don't like just because your partner enjoys it. At times like that all you can do is take some extra medication, grab a huge cup of coffee, break out an extra six-pack, and man up...even if it means going to the theater. 15 Jun 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-06-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 174B8E37-0DB8-4181-8129-DECF37CBCB91 253 Gay Male Envy There comes a time in every relationship when the best thing to do to maintain harmony is to suck it up and do something you don't like just because your partner enjoys it. At times like that all you can do is take some extra medication, grab a huge cup of coffee, break out an extra six-pack, and man up...even if it means going to the theater. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:35 yes Perhaps when parents give their children the talk about the "birds and the bees", they might add that the birds and the bees masturbate, too. That might be a way to prevent accidents, such as getting a fish stuck in your penis or having power tools inserted into your vagina. It might also help every straight women know what an orgasm feels like before they have to go and find their first Lesbian experience. 12 Jun 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-06-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 99946570-4FFC-4333-B91D-8046DAF4B07A 252 Basics of Masturbation Perhaps when parents give their children the talk about the "birds and the bees", they might add that the birds and the bees masturbate, too. That might be a way to prevent accidents, such as getting a fish stuck in your penis or having power tools inserted into your vagina. It might also help every straight women know what an orgasm feels like before they have to go and find their first Lesbian experience. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:30 yes We've all heard about people that get fired from their jobs or suspended from school because they stay up all night playing games on their computer and can't go to work or school for days at a time. What we never considered was that Gramps would get his first computer and start staying up late at night playing poker with people he's never met and that call themselves by names he has never said out loud in his life. 10 Jun 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-06-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0AE3D207-C1CF-43D0-B04E-D36248C2E904 251 Gramps Dot Com We've all heard about people that get fired from their jobs or suspended from school because they stay up all night playing games on their computer and can't go to work or school for days at a time. What we never considered was that Gramps would get his first computer and start staying up late at night playing poker with people he's never met and that call themselves by names he has never said out loud in his life. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:02 yes No matter how hard we try to maintain a separation of church and state in this country, we will never be able to keep prayer out of our schools, public or private. On the day of the big exam students all over the school are reaching out and praying to any deity that will help them pass the test, even if they haven't opened a book all year. 29 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast FCDD48E7-B50E-454A-872D-814AD06D4346 250 Agreeably Disagreeable No matter how hard we try to maintain a separation of church and state in this country, we will never be able to keep prayer out of our schools, public or private. On the day of the big exam students all over the school are reaching out and praying to any deity that will help them pass the test, even if they haven't opened a book all year. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:03 yes Almost everyone has had a crazy ex, but not everyone has one that crosses the line into psycho ex. It's hard to figure out exactly where that line is, but comes somewhere after the point where they change their last name to yours after you break up, they start stalking you from three states away, and you need to take out a restraining order to protect your entire family, including your dog. 26 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast F9C2E114-99F1-4933-AB49-57ECFC5473AB 249 Apology Accepted Almost everyone has had a crazy ex, but not everyone has one that crosses the line into psycho ex. It's hard to figure out exactly where that line is, but comes somewhere after the point where they change their last name to yours after you break up, they start stalking you from three states away, and you need to take out a restraining order to protect your entire family, including your dog. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:39 yes The rules of successful one night stands are: never sleep with your friends, never sleep with her twice, never take her home to your house so that she knows where you live, never spend the night, and never take off any jewelry that you want to see again. As Lesbians we are simply doomed to break every single one of these rules no matter how hard we try. The least you can do is to bring your own dental dams. 23 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast F6049B9E-87E0-4798-ADF9-DC28E5C52DA2 248 Ribbed For Her Pleasure The rules of successful one night stands are: never sleep with your friends, never sleep with her twice, never take her home to your house so that she knows where you live, never spend the night, and never take off any jewelry that you want to see again. As Lesbians we are simply doomed to break every single one of these rules no matter how hard we try. The least you can do is to bring your own dental dams. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:41 yes Why bother spending time and money trying to cure cancer or to stop the pandemic spread of AIDS? We've got lots more important things to do. There are dogs to clone and pets that we need to make glow in the dark. After all...we do have priorities. 20 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B7383F8F-A555-4929-B923-ECCB9881235C 247 Glow in the Dark Why bother spending time and money trying to cure cancer or to stop the pandemic spread of AIDS? We've got lots more important things to do. There are dogs to clone and pets that we need to make glow in the dark. After all...we do have priorities. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 08:01 yes Freedom of expression is something that as humans we should all be able to enjoy. Feel free to fly your freak flag wherever you go. When you finally go to get your eyebrows plucked, however, try to be polite and at least bring an extra vacuum cleaner bag for the cosmetician who has to clean up all your hair they pulled off. 17 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B586965C-8341-4054-A0FF-13603567C41B 246 Frau Lippenbrau Freedom of expression is something that as humans we should all be able to enjoy. Feel free to fly your freak flag wherever you go. When you finally go to get your eyebrows plucked, however, try to be polite and at least bring an extra vacuum cleaner bag for the cosmetician who has to clean up all your hair they pulled off. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:31 yes After all these years we come to find out that there was one more missing tablet that Moses forget to take down the mountain when he brought down the ten commandments. That eleventh commandment has now been found. It says, "Thou shalt not pose half naked in sexy red panties for Hustler Magazine if you plan on keeping your Miss California crown." 14 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 403CF4A7-45C0-4D7C-8924-F91BE502302A 245 Miss Kuntafornia After all these years we come to find out that there was one more missing tablet that Moses forget to take down the mountain when he brought down the ten commandments. That eleventh commandment has now been found. It says, "Thou shalt not pose half naked in sexy red panties for Hustler Magazine if you plan on keeping your Miss California crown." 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:55 yes There's a reason why the U.S. postal rates are going up in price. It now takes four postal employees, three hours, three post office locations and one self-service postage machine to mail one single package. The cost of the employees to handle all that time, effort and customer service is not nearly enough to cover the amount spent in postage to mail one simple package. 11 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 3D705594-4D66-4E80-AC25-FF51A26C4DCD 244 The Package There's a reason why the U.S. postal rates are going up in price. It now takes four postal employees, three hours, three post office locations and one self-service postage machine to mail one single package. The cost of the employees to handle all that time, effort and customer service is not nearly enough to cover the amount spent in postage to mail one simple package. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 20:35 yes No matter where you shop, it's always appropriate to ask for the "Homo Discount" when you see a big ol' Muff Diver working behind the counter. If you don't succeed in getting a discount on your purchase, maybe you can at least get a date out of it. 5 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast FA8F0E9C-F5A1-4598-81B1-683E7C607102 243 Scooter Girl No matter where you shop, it's always appropriate to ask for the "Homo Discount" when you see a big ol' Muff Diver working behind the counter. If you don't succeed in getting a discount on your purchase, maybe you can at least get a date out of it. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:44 yes If you're going to be kept up all night by noises outside your house, it may as well be the neighbors going at it like rabbits. At least that way you know someone is having a good time....even if it's not you. 1 May 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-05-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast EFF1E71A-DB06-4BF9-8984-A4A68B64892C 242 Vampire Birds If you're going to be kept up all night by noises outside your house, it may as well be the neighbors going at it like rabbits. At least that way you know someone is having a good time....even if it's not you. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:50 yes As people become parents they are automatically endowed with a secret sixth sense. It's the ability to detect pornography going on anywhere within a 50 foot radius around their children. They don't need to see it, smell it, feel it or touch it. Somehow...they just know. 28 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast FFB6BE0A-D6AF-4763-8EFA-9C6FB852C80E 241 Playmates at Home As people become parents they are automatically endowed with a secret sixth sense. It's the ability to detect pornography going on anywhere within a 50 foot radius around their children. They don't need to see it, smell it, feel it or touch it. Somehow...they just know. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:21 yes Who needs to use an e-vite when you can send a message to a friend telling them they now have the same STD as you...and then invite them to a party at the same time? Of course, you may not need to buy as many snacks or drinks for the party since you may not have too many guests. 25 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast C455C2F4-BA5E-4AB8-84C2-1FAD711C7666 240 STD-Vite Who needs to use an e-vite when you can send a message to a friend telling them they now have the same STD as you...and then invite them to a party at the same time? Of course, you may not need to buy as many snacks or drinks for the party since you may not have too many guests. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:52 yes When she tells you "I need space", what she really means is that she's really not that into you and that she intends on whoring around with anyone she can find. Of course, she won't actually break up with you, and you can plan on her living with you and sleeping in your bed for at least the next 12 months. That's just the mutant Lesbian gene at work. 22 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 8813B24A-697A-4FB5-BC38-456E14B5C831 239 When It's Over When she tells you "I need space", what she really means is that she's really not that into you and that she intends on whoring around with anyone she can find. Of course, she won't actually break up with you, and you can plan on her living with you and sleeping in your bed for at least the next 12 months. That's just the mutant Lesbian gene at work. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:16 yes Studies show that LGBT youth are 2 to 3 times more likely to commit suicide compared with straight youth. Sometimes life can be overwhelming and you may feel like you're all alone. When you start to feel like you're the only one, just count 20 people that you know and realize that at least 2 out of 20 are likely to be Gay or Lesbian. Since you're one of them...all you need to do now is figure out who is the other one. If you need more help, call the Trevor Helpline at 866-4 -U-TREVOR. 19 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 47D5B4A0-0708-462E-9238-14C58D68B060 238 Out, Loud and Proud Studies show that LGBT youth are 2 to 3 times more likely to commit suicide compared with straight youth. Sometimes life can be overwhelming and you may feel like you're all alone. When you start to feel like you're the only one, just count 20 people that you know and realize that at least 2 out of 20 are likely to be Gay or Lesbian. Since you're one of them...all you need to do now is figure out who is the other one. If you need more help, call the Trevor Helpline at 866-4 -U-TREVOR. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:21 yes You can blame global warming or even changes in the eco-system due to the way we've mistreated our environment. In reality those things have nothing to do with the biblical plague of crickets that's now driving us crazy. The real cause is the fact that Gay people are now allowed to get married in several states in the U.S. Congratulations Iowa! 12 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast E8FFB877-C02E-40E7-8B5E-9DEF4D4CECBE 237 Plague of Crickets You can blame global warming or even changes in the eco-system due to the way we've mistreated our environment. In reality those things have nothing to do with the biblical plague of crickets that's now driving us crazy. The real cause is the fact that Gay people are now allowed to get married in several states in the U.S. Congratulations Iowa! 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:45 yes If it smells like fish...maybe it is. If it smells like fish, but it's your date...maybe you need to take her to the gynecologist before you take her out to dinner. More good advice such as this...when you download the whole show. You're welcome. 9 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast C5EB97C5-0793-4C7F-A840-BC12171B91F0 236 Lick It Up If it smells like fish...maybe it is. If it smells like fish, but it's your date...maybe you need to take her to the gynecologist before you take her out to dinner. More good advice such as this...when you download the whole show. You're welcome. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:15 yes Can't get a date? Yes, you can. Mark April 15 on you calendar so that you can troll all the Starbucks in town for Same Sex Kiss Day. If you're just coming out of the closet...or even thinking about coming out...don't worry about how people will know if you're a Lesbian or not. You're probably the last one to know already. 6 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast C503A262-390E-47F0-A8FF-DBE3A0644C3C 235 Same Sex Kiss Day Can't get a date? Yes, you can. Mark April 15 on you calendar so that you can troll all the Starbucks in town for Same Sex Kiss Day. If you're just coming out of the closet...or even thinking about coming out...don't worry about how people will know if you're a Lesbian or not. You're probably the last one to know already. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:18 yes Our future depends on a greener tomorrow and it's important for each of us to do whatever little bit we can to help preserve our beautiful planet. Of course, if the city you live in bans detergent that cleans properly because it has too many pollutants, then feel free to get in your big car, fill it up with leaded gasoline and travel to a store further away than usual so that you can burn more gas and send more emissions directly into the atmosphere. 3 Apr 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-04-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 2CBB0DBA-2192-45F2-A478-0D1A22DBD586 234 Eco Terrorists Our future depends on a greener tomorrow and it's important for each of us to do whatever little bit we can to help preserve our beautiful planet. Of course, if the city you live in bans detergent that cleans properly because it has too many pollutants, then feel free to get in your big car, fill it up with leaded gasoline and travel to a store further away than usual so that you can burn more gas and send more emissions directly into the atmosphere. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:13 yes Every LGBT person has a coming out story and every one is unique and beautiful in its own way. Some are sad, while others are heartwarming and full of joy. At the end of the day, there are not too many people who can say that their coming out story includes a discussion about whether or not their dad gives it to their mom in the butt. 31 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 3AACE51A-48C2-4D6F-B5CF-847E6B547C5D 233 Coming Out With Linda and Lu Every LGBT person has a coming out story and every one is unique and beautiful in its own way. Some are sad, while others are heartwarming and full of joy. At the end of the day, there are not too many people who can say that their coming out story includes a discussion about whether or not their dad gives it to their mom in the butt. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:26 yes Most massage parlors you come across will be reputable establishments. There are a few, however, that provide those little extras such as the "happy ending". To keep yourself out of harm's way here are some red flags to look for: a lady with a nurse's uniform on who comes running across the parking lot at a strip mall to flag you down, a stripper pole in the middle of the room, or a tube of KY next to the bottle of massage oil. 28 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0AC94B63-B1E4-47E4-8850-605FB02A2D6F 232 Happy Ending Most massage parlors you come across will be reputable establishments. There are a few, however, that provide those little extras such as the "happy ending". To keep yourself out of harm's way here are some red flags to look for: a lady with a nurse's uniform on who comes running across the parking lot at a strip mall to flag you down, a stripper pole in the middle of the room, or a tube of KY next to the bottle of massage oil. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:01 yes It's ok to love some inanimate objects. Lots of people love their cars, their purse collection or even their favorite dildo. It only crosses the line when you actually marry the Eifel Tower, have public sex with a carnival ride or inappropriately caress a piece of fence post in your family room in front of your mother. 24 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast F1CF971C-AB8B-4209-B4F5-F1F0889F572D 231 In Love With My Dildo It's ok to love some inanimate objects. Lots of people love their cars, their purse collection or even their favorite dildo. It only crosses the line when you actually marry the Eifel Tower, have public sex with a carnival ride or inappropriately caress a piece of fence post in your family room in front of your mother. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:55 yes One universal truth stands the test of time for Gays and Lesbians all over the world. The one thing that can put a smile on our faces no matter how angry we are is to hear the Gay anthem "We Are Family" from Sister Sledge. Go to iTunes right now, download the track and then play it at top volume from every speaker in your house. Make sure the windows are open and that you're singing along. 21 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 9DD61B1D-E4E7-4BE3-A63C-F2E26A89FCE6 230 H8: Still Angry One universal truth stands the test of time for Gays and Lesbians all over the world. The one thing that can put a smile on our faces no matter how angry we are is to hear the Gay anthem "We Are Family" from Sister Sledge. Go to iTunes right now, download the track and then play it at top volume from every speaker in your house. Make sure the windows are open and that you're singing along. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:20 yes It's a guinea pig's wet dream. Living next door to 24 hot girls who all come into heat at the same time. It doesn't really leave a guy a lot of choice, but to take care of business and then sleep for the next two days. Next time you think about getting a pet try Sea Monkeys instead. 18 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 65A62EF4-CE0F-4C0D-B7B8-C8FD93AF0D27 229 Sea Monkey's and Mouse Dicks It's a guinea pig's wet dream. Living next door to 24 hot girls who all come into heat at the same time. It doesn't really leave a guy a lot of choice, but to take care of business and then sleep for the next two days. Next time you think about getting a pet try Sea Monkeys instead. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:41 yes Back in the day it used to be easy to share naked photos of your friends. All you needed was a cheap camera and a friend at the drugstore who would develop the pictures for you. Now all you have to do is snap it on your cell phone and text it off to all your friends. The only difference is that now you can get arrested and have to register as a sex offender for the rest of your life. 15 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 4CAA0E19-42C9-450F-8C24-06094DBA77D3 228 Sexting Back in the day it used to be easy to share naked photos of your friends. All you needed was a cheap camera and a friend at the drugstore who would develop the pictures for you. Now all you have to do is snap it on your cell phone and text it off to all your friends. The only difference is that now you can get arrested and have to register as a sex offender for the rest of your life. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:33 yes It only takes one time for you to tune into late night TV with the plethora of infomercials for countless products you've never heard of before to turn you into a believer. All of a sudden your skin can be clearer, your tomatoes will grow even larger, you'll build muscles you didn't even know you had...and you'll be able to shit out every toxin that ever inhabited your body. You've been warned.  Listen at your own risk. 11 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 6806282D-4EDB-42A2-A2AF-483E817E17D8 227 Scatology 101 It only takes one time for you to tune into late night TV with the plethora of infomercials for countless products you've never heard of before to turn you into a believer. All of a sudden your skin can be clearer, your tomatoes will grow even larger, you'll build muscles you didn't even know you had...and you'll be able to shit out every toxin that ever inhabited your body. You've been warned.  Listen at your own risk. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 16:53 yes Even if you travel all over the world you'll notice that there are certain signs that we all intuitively know and that transcend language. We all know the blue sign with a traiangular shaped woman that signifies the ladies room or a red hexagon sign that means "stop". Then why is it that more people don't recognize the universal message you're sending out when you put on a pair of headphones when someone sits next to you and seems like they want to talk? 8 Mar 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-03-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 4FD63C56-C99C-459A-92D7-DF3FFF61A464 226 Respect Your Elders Even if you travel all over the world you'll notice that there are certain signs that we all intuitively know and that transcend language. We all know the blue sign with a traiangular shaped woman that signifies the ladies room or a red hexagon sign that means "stop". Then why is it that more people don't recognize the universal message you're sending out when you put on a pair of headphones when someone sits next to you and seems like they want to talk? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:37 yes Karma has an interesting way of making things right in the world.  What's worse is that when you're married, your mate may even have to pay for your evil deeds. It's gonna be a real bitch when you get the payback for that porn collection you stole from your friends when you were younger. 25 Feb 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-02-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast F6B2C822-AC9A-4E29-B129-DAE933200B6A 225 Missing Porn Collection Karma has an interesting way of making things right in the world.  What's worse is that when you're married, your mate may even have to pay for your evil deeds. It's gonna be a real bitch when you get the payback for that porn collection you stole from your friends when you were younger. 2homos@2homos.com (2 Homos) lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:00 yes Once again...Craig's List proves that there really is someone for everyone. If you're looking for that perfect girl...the one that let's you treat her like shit, the one who lets you spend all her money, the one that likes it when you leave beer cans and take-out food all over the house until it rots...you'd better hurry up and answer that personals ad. She probably already has a line around the block waiting to take her out on a date. 22 Feb 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-02-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast C10D90C0-CD8C-421F-AD83-F5AD3C024253 224 Muddy Doormat Once again...Craig's List proves that there really is someone for everyone. If you're looking for that perfect girl...the one that let's you treat her like shit, the one who lets you spend all her money, the one that likes it when you leave beer cans and take-out food all over the house until it rots...you'd better hurry up and answer that personals ad. She probably already has a line around the block waiting to take her out on a date. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:32 yes The conservatives were right when they said that if we let Gay people get married, the next thing we'll want to do is have sex with our dogs and maybe even marry them. Now we have to take our dog, Lulu, to a therapist so that she can use the stuffed therapeutic dog toy to show the doctor where she's been touched. 18 Feb 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-02-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast CF890413-7421-45A9-AB07-D535959CB86D 223 Lulu's Vagina The conservatives were right when they said that if we let Gay people get married, the next thing we'll want to do is have sex with our dogs and maybe even marry them. Now we have to take our dog, Lulu, to a therapist so that she can use the stuffed therapeutic dog toy to show the doctor where she's been touched. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:12 yes On what should be the happiest and romantic day of the year, people can still prove themselves to be insolent, vicious, rude pigs. That's when it's time to break out the big guns and show no mercy at all. Go out shopping with the worst case of gas you've had in years and when the rude bastards come near you...just let it rip in the most silent, but deadly way possible. 14 Feb 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-02-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B47209A2-B1E5-4BB6-8C73-9EDCE2F96E71 222 V.D. Again On what should be the happiest and romantic day of the year, people can still prove themselves to be insolent, vicious, rude pigs. That's when it's time to break out the big guns and show no mercy at all. Go out shopping with the worst case of gas you've had in years and when the rude bastards come near you...just let it rip in the most silent, but deadly way possible. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:59 yes It may be cold outside right now, but summertime is just around the corner. It's not too early to start thinking about long, hot days at the beach and all the fun you'll be having in a few short months. You may want to start planning right now for those lazy days hanging out on the beach blanket playing Tramp Stamp Bingo. 11 Feb 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-02-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 73C63B7E-0A72-4B44-8295-618F6617B537 221 Tramp Stamp Bingo It may be cold outside right now, but summertime is just around the corner. It's not too early to start thinking about long, hot days at the beach and all the fun you'll be having in a few short months. You may want to start planning right now for those lazy days hanging out on the beach blanket playing Tramp Stamp Bingo. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:00 yes With the recession going on in California, one enterprising woman has found a way to make a cool, easy $2 million as the new baby expert on "Oprah". With 14 asses to wipe, 14 mouths to feed and 14 kids to send to college, she's going to need all the help she can get. 8 Feb 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-02-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0E17401E-AB12-4F99-88F6-A5BBB7244E67 220 Eight is Not Enough With the recession going on in California, one enterprising woman has found a way to make a cool, easy $2 million as the new baby expert on "Oprah". With 14 asses to wipe, 14 mouths to feed and 14 kids to send to college, she's going to need all the help she can get. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:38 yes Next time you're thinking about getting that cute new haircut that you saw in a magazine...take a few minutes to ask yourself one very important question. Is it the hair cut that you like or is it the thought of the haircut model between your legs that's really calling out your name? 28 Jan 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-01-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast FF1F92EF-B544-4A3F-81EB-5226DC6A1035 219 Dyke-A-Do Next time you're thinking about getting that cute new haircut that you saw in a magazine...take a few minutes to ask yourself one very important question. Is it the hair cut that you like or is it the thought of the haircut model between your legs that's really calling out your name? 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:31 yes Millions of new ideas are born every single day. People with entrepreneurial spirits are always coming up with new and exciting products or business opportunities that could be the next big thing. Of course, they all know someone who is an expert at crushing their dreams right from the start so that their money-making ideas never even have a chance to hatch. 25 Jan 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-01-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast B969CC22-DA89-4591-9094-2AE69A6317C4 218 I Vag You Millions of new ideas are born every single day. People with entrepreneurial spirits are always coming up with new and exciting products or business opportunities that could be the next big thing. Of course, they all know someone who is an expert at crushing their dreams right from the start so that their money-making ideas never even have a chance to hatch. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:58 yes If you're going to run for a public office you'll need a platform to run on. You'll need to have a point of view and some important issues to inspire people to vote for you. You have to give the people something to believe in, even if your campaign is all about stopping people from shitting in public. 22 Jan 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-01-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 7D0B75F4-DCB1-41F9-AC30-765ECC83E21D 217 Roxanne For Mayor If you're going to run for a public office you'll need a platform to run on. You'll need to have a point of view and some important issues to inspire people to vote for you. You have to give the people something to believe in, even if your campaign is all about stopping people from shitting in public. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:23 yes Lesbians all over the world were outraged last Sunday night to find out that they would have to endure another season of "The L Word" with the vile and insipid Jenny character. The only saving grace is the possibility that we'll get a new Lesbian series with Leisha Hailey as someone's prison bitch. Read all the details of the new series at www.shewired.com. 19 Jan 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-01-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast C3CEE354-FD4F-46C9-A13F-B701368FC642 216 Spin Off Lesbians all over the world were outraged last Sunday night to find out that they would have to endure another season of "The L Word" with the vile and insipid Jenny character. The only saving grace is the possibility that we'll get a new Lesbian series with Leisha Hailey as someone's prison bitch. Read all the details of the new series at www.shewired.com. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:04 yes The mother-daughter bond is unique in many ways. Whether she was the one who squeezed you out of her birth canal, the one who brought you up or the one you simply lean on for support, she'll always be "Mom". She's the one who knows exactly how to push your buttons, how to make you feel guilty about almost anything and the one who makes sure that therapists will always have a job. 14 Jan 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-01-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 2F059D24-38CE-4BFE-BD31-43CD604D93A5 215 Homo For The Holidays The mother-daughter bond is unique in many ways. Whether she was the one who squeezed you out of her birth canal, the one who brought you up or the one you simply lean on for support, she'll always be "Mom". She's the one who knows exactly how to push your buttons, how to make you feel guilty about almost anything and the one who makes sure that therapists will always have a job. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:09 yes Sometimes we wonder where today's kids went wrong...why they lie, why they have trust issues, or maybe even why they have psychological problems or other trauma in their lives. It never occurs to us that all those lies we told to them when they were growing up might have something to do with it. Instead, we keep propogating the myth of Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy and some overweight rabbit that lays eggs. 11 Jan 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-01-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 7E929FEB-48AC-4578-BEFE-13BE192EC99B 214 Little White Lies Sometimes we wonder where today's kids went wrong...why they lie, why they have trust issues, or maybe even why they have psychological problems or other trauma in their lives. It never occurs to us that all those lies we told to them when they were growing up might have something to do with it. Instead, we keep propogating the myth of Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy and some overweight rabbit that lays eggs. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:07 yes Studies show that the majority of pedophiles are straight white males. Apparently, straight males also build robots that they can screw and even marry. With all this going on...it's hard to believe that anyone is worried about Gays getting married. 4 Jan 2009 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2009-01-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 383A5808-A437-41ED-BAB8-F7997F606BF0 213 Girlfriend For Sale Studies show that the majority of pedophiles are straight white males. Apparently, straight males also build robots that they can screw and even marry. With all this going on...it's hard to believe that anyone is worried about Gays getting married. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:05 yes Some people treat their pets as their children. That means you can never call someone's pet ugly...even if it is. Next time you're pet sitting, make sure you have some compliments ready to go just in case you need them. Here's a handy one to use on just such occasions: "Oh! Your baby has such pretty hair!" 27 Dec 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-12-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 7C8B799B-F039-422B-9D3E-1DEE2E273D67 212 Pet Sitting Some people treat their pets as their children. That means you can never call someone's pet ugly...even if it is. Next time you're pet sitting, make sure you have some compliments ready to go just in case you need them. Here's a handy one to use on just such occasions: "Oh! Your baby has such pretty hair!" 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:16 yes Statistics show that more relationships come to an end during the holidays than at any other time of year. This year you can make a difference and save your own relationship by not being a selfish pig. Forget the practical, useful gift that she can use all year. Get her something useless and expensive instead. You're welcome. 23 Dec 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-12-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 283E4DE1-E324-44E4-B43D-6466E36017B7 211 The Perfect Gift Statistics show that more relationships come to an end during the holidays than at any other time of year. This year you can make a difference and save your own relationship by not being a selfish pig. Forget the practical, useful gift that she can use all year. Get her something useless and expensive instead. You're welcome. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:54 yes Opinions are like assholes...everyone has one. The funny thing is that we're going to look rather odd walking around with two. That's going to make people talk. 14 Dec 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-12-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 7CAE153A-89C7-450F-A03F-A3F37C6C2B16 210 A Difference of Opinion Opinions are like assholes...everyone has one. The funny thing is that we're going to look rather odd walking around with two. That's going to make people talk. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:38 yes Becoming a vegan seemed like such a good idea at first. You were going to save the world, end hunger and stop global warming. Next time, instead of being so self-centered and selfish, think about your friends who can't stand going out to dinner with you, who can't ever invite you over for a meal and who have to think of new and exciting ways to serve up Quorn just because you won't eat anything with eyes. 11 Dec 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-12-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 6E0D2324-19A5-4DAA-9048-CC44F2D83139 209 Vegan For a Day Becoming a vegan seemed like such a good idea at first. You were going to save the world, end hunger and stop global warming. Next time, instead of being so self-centered and selfish, think about your friends who can't stand going out to dinner with you, who can't ever invite you over for a meal and who have to think of new and exciting ways to serve up Quorn just because you won't eat anything with eyes. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:10 yes It's off to college and time for your first real Lesbian experience. Make sure you take the time to do your research and studying beforehand so that after the first time you make sure you come away with all A's and head directly to the top of the class. 8 Dec 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-12-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 26FF8EB6-875F-42F2-ADB6-8DD656223F2A 208 Exploring is Half the Fun It's off to college and time for your first real Lesbian experience. Make sure you take the time to do your research and studying beforehand so that after the first time you make sure you come away with all A's and head directly to the top of the class. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:14 yes When the enonomy turns sour it's time to exercise those entrepreneurial skills to help make a little extra cash. With eBay it's easy to drum up a little extra cash by selling what you've got...even if it's your virginity. I wish we'd thought of that. 4 Dec 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-12-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0948574A-E197-4EA4-9822-76499E3C8D39 207 Selling Virginity on eBay When the enonomy turns sour it's time to exercise those entrepreneurial skills to help make a little extra cash. With eBay it's easy to drum up a little extra cash by selling what you've got...even if it's your virginity. I wish we'd thought of that. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:12 yes A simple request for advice turns into a math lesson for all. It's a shame that so many Lesbians seem to have missed that day in school the first time around. We'll just have to help tutor the rest of you. Get out your pencils. 1 Dec 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-12-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer, podcast 0673E8E2-618B-42DC-AA14-4592DAC86B28 206 The New Bitch Math A simple request for advice turns into a math lesson for all. It's a shame that so many Lesbians seem to have missed that day in school the first time around. We'll just have to help tutor the rest of you. Get out your pencils. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, podcast, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:25 yes Nothing says "holiday stress" like having to go to three different stores for groceries on the day before Thanksgiving, with a list you got from someone else, and with items on it that you're not really sure about. The entire Thanksgiving dinner hangs in the balance and depends on whether or not you get the right type of carrots. 28 Nov 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-11-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Lesbian+Podcast, Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer E8D0122D-9A90-405B-9D97-F777B662F2C0 205 Bag of Carrots Nothing says "holiday stress" like having to go to three different stores for groceries on the day before Thanksgiving, with a list you got from someone else, and with items on it that you're not really sure about. The entire Thanksgiving dinner hangs in the balance and depends on whether or not you get the right type of carrots. 2 Homos lesbian+podcast, lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:08 yes With the price of airline tickets these days, if you're going to fly you may as well get your money's worth. Insist on on an airline with a full array of inflight services to make your next long trip as comfortable as possible.  If they don't have "dancers" on board...just forget it. 23 Nov 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-11-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 290E8E07-7C3A-4942-8AAD-0B9714C0EB3E 204 Airplane With the price of airline tickets these days, if you're going to fly you may as well get your money's worth. Insist on on an airline with a full array of inflight services to make your next long trip as comfortable as possible.  If they don't have "dancers" on board...just forget it. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:09 yes Even if you're not outraged over Prop 8 in California, there are still plenty of good reasons to join the protests. You no longer have to waste your time meeting freaks on the on-line web sites, chat rooms and at bars. You'll find lots of lots attractive Lesbians down at the protests...and they already know they want to get married. 16 Nov 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-11-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer C81D2521-758D-425C-86AF-44F00572530F 203 Can't Get a Date? Even if you're not outraged over Prop 8 in California, there are still plenty of good reasons to join the protests. You no longer have to waste your time meeting freaks on the on-line web sites, chat rooms and at bars. You'll find lots of lots attractive Lesbians down at the protests...and they already know they want to get married. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:40 yes Now Lesbians can live forever in the comfort of knowing that they will never have to part with their favorite cats even after they've passed on. By spinning Fluffy's fur into yarn and then knitting a pretty little sweater, they'll be able to wear and stroke their favorite pussy for the rest of their lives. It's the ultimate Lesbian fantasy. 12 Nov 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-11-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer D3F2270C-325D-4A83-89F2-5AFB9E362FB1 202 Somebody Call PETA Now Lesbians can live forever in the comfort of knowing that they will never have to part with their favorite cats even after they've passed on. By spinning Fluffy's fur into yarn and then knitting a pretty little sweater, they'll be able to wear and stroke their favorite pussy for the rest of their lives. It's the ultimate Lesbian fantasy. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:00 yes Just because a woman has teeth in her head, it doesn't mean that a man has to wake up with bite marks on his member after a heated night in the hay. The same goes for Lesbians with long nails....as long as she knows how to work those things! Novices need not apply. 9 Nov 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-11-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 3D5C39BE-255C-44A7-ACDF-89677C4B6492 201 Bed of Nails Just because a woman has teeth in her head, it doesn't mean that a man has to wake up with bite marks on his member after a heated night in the hay. The same goes for Lesbians with long nails....as long as she knows how to work those things! Novices need not apply. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:00 yes As an American it's time to get up off your lazy ass and vote. Don't do it because it's your civic duty. Don't do it because your vote can change the course of this country for the next four years. Do it because once you're done you can get a free cup of coffee at Starbucks and a free donut at Krispy Kreme. Otherwise...why leave the house at all? 3 Nov 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-11-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 33F79485-D0BE-471C-A518-E55106456E87 200 Vote or Else... As an American it's time to get up off your lazy ass and vote. Don't do it because it's your civic duty. Don't do it because your vote can change the course of this country for the next four years. Do it because once you're done you can get a free cup of coffee at Starbucks and a free donut at Krispy Kreme. Otherwise...why leave the house at all? 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:18 yes There's no use in trying to fight it. Once you move in together, nothing either of you have is secret anymore. Not even that secret list of all the exes you've ever slept with in your lifetime. 26 Oct 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-10-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 91129287-13E7-41BF-ADF7-516FC9F055DA 199 The Ex Files There's no use in trying to fight it. Once you move in together, nothing either of you have is secret anymore. Not even that secret list of all the exes you've ever slept with in your lifetime. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:32 yes Why just add a little fiber to your diet, when you can get super clean instead with a complete colon detox? Impress your friends by crapping out 12-inch long turds two or more times a day and just say "no" to living with those 15 extra pounds of impacted fecal matter forever. 22 Oct 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-10-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 77C50AAA-0B2D-4671-A764-DCC2D85D9B03 198 Super Clean Why just add a little fiber to your diet, when you can get super clean instead with a complete colon detox? Impress your friends by crapping out 12-inch long turds two or more times a day and just say "no" to living with those 15 extra pounds of impacted fecal matter forever. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:46 yes Some White Trash is easy to spot.  It's the way they know how to serve Spam in 25 different dishes, the way they can leave the cigarette ash hanging while they feed the baby, or the fact that a dentist doesn't live anywhere within a 100 mile radius of town. Then there's the kind catch you by surprise by paying the bill at a restaurant and never leaving a tip. 19 Oct 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-10-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer BAE24ED8-7942-414D-8D59-C6EE12CCEB11 197 Giving White Trash a Bad Name Some White Trash is easy to spot.  It's the way they know how to serve Spam in 25 different dishes, the way they can leave the cigarette ash hanging while they feed the baby, or the fact that a dentist doesn't live anywhere within a 100 mile radius of town. Then there's the kind catch you by surprise by paying the bill at a restaurant and never leaving a tip. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:58 yes When people get married some couples change one of the last names so that the entire family shares the same name. Other people simply hyphenate both last names together. Then there are those souls who can only find a happy compromise by changing their last names to something altogether different. Meet the Kuntz family. 13 Oct 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-10-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 608228C0-CAE7-4922-BCC4-D6214909B765 196 Meet the Kuntz Family When people get married some couples change one of the last names so that the entire family shares the same name. Other people simply hyphenate both last names together. Then there are those souls who can only find a happy compromise by changing their last names to something altogether different. Meet the Kuntz family. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:40 yes Most people only plan to get married once in their lives. So, if you're going to do it, you better make sure you do it right. Be the absolute best bridezilla you can be, even if it means picking chicken out of your teeth with a fake nail while you're getting a pedicure. 8 Oct 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-10-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer B2FAD975-5455-40B8-AE43-1412DB456295 195 The MTV Generation Most people only plan to get married once in their lives. So, if you're going to do it, you better make sure you do it right. Be the absolute best bridezilla you can be, even if it means picking chicken out of your teeth with a fake nail while you're getting a pedicure. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:21 yes Now that school is back in session, it might be helpful for all the young Lesbians and baby Dykes to get some good advice about coming out to their new college roommates. How that got to hot sexual fantasies about Sarah Palin, we'll never truly understand. 5 Oct 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-10-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 66D43580-E778-4F17-9C9C-A45CD8A2F610 194 Roommates Now that school is back in session, it might be helpful for all the young Lesbians and baby Dykes to get some good advice about coming out to their new college roommates. How that got to hot sexual fantasies about Sarah Palin, we'll never truly understand. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:17 yes If it wasn't enough for the Olympics to keep Lesbians out of the games by dropping Softball as an Olympic sport, now we have more proof that there is a conspiracy of Olympic proportions brewing. The official uniform of Beach Volleyball is now a pair of panties and a bra. What happened to board shorts, a sports bra and lots of hair gel? At least they still have cool sunglasses. 1 Oct 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-10-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer F1030560-E42A-4F1A-8DD0-CD2C8DF9C838 193 The Olympics Conspiracy If it wasn't enough for the Olympics to keep Lesbians out of the games by dropping Softball as an Olympic sport, now we have more proof that there is a conspiracy of Olympic proportions brewing. The official uniform of Beach Volleyball is now a pair of panties and a bra. What happened to board shorts, a sports bra and lots of hair gel? At least they still have cool sunglasses. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:00 yes Really? You don't love your body because your dick is too big? If you find yourself with so much time on your hands that you have to worry about not loving your body because your dick is too big, then you certainly have enough time to go out and find someone else who does love it that big. 28 Sep 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-09-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 594233AF-C3BC-4882-A4E6-A74A15049996 192 Loving Your Body Really? You don't love your body because your dick is too big? If you find yourself with so much time on your hands that you have to worry about not loving your body because your dick is too big, then you certainly have enough time to go out and find someone else who does love it that big. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:29 yes It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it. It doesn't matter if you're taking out a pile of old newspapers, the ex-girlfriend or just the overflowing holiday decorations that are consuming the entire garage...that crap needs to go. We offer some helpful advice on making the chore a little easier. 25 Sep 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-09-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 0F34E412-AD24-42B9-A471-148F105627D2 191 Taking Out The Trash It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it. It doesn't matter if you're taking out a pile of old newspapers, the ex-girlfriend or just the overflowing holiday decorations that are consuming the entire garage...that crap needs to go. We offer some helpful advice on making the chore a little easier. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:32 yes Our elders lived their lives leaving nothing to waste. When they went out hunting for food they used every single piece of the animal all the way down to the toenails. Next time you think about shaving your pits and letting the remnants go down the drain, think twice about that selfish act and instead donate it to women who have no underarm hair. You'll love yourself for it. 22 Sep 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-09-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer E21B1F32-2DA5-46D1-B20F-84BD4B6CD303 190 Pits of Love Our elders lived their lives leaving nothing to waste. When they went out hunting for food they used every single piece of the animal all the way down to the toenails. Next time you think about shaving your pits and letting the remnants go down the drain, think twice about that selfish act and instead donate it to women who have no underarm hair. You'll love yourself for it. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:28 yes It's been over year that we've been talking about it and still nothing has happened. Not one bit of progress has been made to assemble all the basic necessities of an earthquake kit. Obviously, a little temblor last week hasn't provided the necessary motivation either. Perhaps a major holiday where we give earthquake kits to all our loved ones as gifts will help with the kick in the ass we need...but we doubt it. 4 Aug 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-08-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 5491AC93-7520-4D1D-BE65-62D0F031311E 189 The Next Big Disaster It's been over year that we've been talking about it and still nothing has happened. Not one bit of progress has been made to assemble all the basic necessities of an earthquake kit. Obviously, a little temblor last week hasn't provided the necessary motivation either. Perhaps a major holiday where we give earthquake kits to all our loved ones as gifts will help with the kick in the ass we need...but we doubt it. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:52 yes Planning a wedding used to be easy. You only had to think about a location, flowers, catering, decorations and which exes to invite. Nowadays you have to think about putting together the perfect prenuptial agreement, too. Or, you can just skip the whole thing and become the typical Lesbian couple that continues to live together after they break up. 31 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 5DE99839-C7C5-4247-A0CD-BAFBC0129D93 188 The Perfect Prenup Planning a wedding used to be easy. You only had to think about a location, flowers, catering, decorations and which exes to invite. Nowadays you have to think about putting together the perfect prenuptial agreement, too. Or, you can just skip the whole thing and become the typical Lesbian couple that continues to live together after they break up. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 15:21 yes Everybody needs some good advice from time to time. Once again, we're here to help. We don't have any tips on getting yourself a better body. We just have all kinds of ideas to help you be "out" at work. Use this advice at your own risk. 28 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 5DBBF02C-1F8A-4C04-8CC7-B446F038349A 187 Working Out Advice Everybody needs some good advice from time to time. Once again, we're here to help. We don't have any tips on getting yourself a better body. We just have all kinds of ideas to help you be "out" at work. Use this advice at your own risk. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:49 yes Life in America....where we have certain freedoms and inalienable rights that we all take for granted. In the Declaration of Independence our forefathers were very clear about these things when they unabashadly stated that among our inalienable rights are....Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Getting Laid. 24 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 0997C301-0F38-4E96-80AA-82E461D4E1A3 186 The Pursuit of Getting Laid Life in America....where we have certain freedoms and inalienable rights that we all take for granted. In the Declaration of Independence our forefathers were very clear about these things when they unabashadly stated that among our inalienable rights are....Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Getting Laid. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:27 yes You already have cramps, you're bleeding like a pig...and you stop by the store to pick up some menstrual supplies. The last thing you need is some crazy Lesbian picking up things out of your shopping cart and telling you what you need and don't need in a maxi pad. 21 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 620A48C6-EF40-4544-8C31-6BFB167CCCB6 185 A River Runs Through It You already have cramps, you're bleeding like a pig...and you stop by the store to pick up some menstrual supplies. The last thing you need is some crazy Lesbian picking up things out of your shopping cart and telling you what you need and don't need in a maxi pad. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:29 yes When you've been romancing a local restaurant for years and selflessly sharing all your love with them, you feel like your in a relationship. They have a responsibility to you as their loyal partner not to just pack up all their things and leave you in the middle of the night with no forwarding address, no reasons why and no explanations. Like a jilted lover, you'll be nursing a broken heart and wondering what you did wrong for the rest of your life. 18 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 07D50FB3-8B33-489E-BA32-595E9581B263 184 Eatin Ain't Cheatin When you've been romancing a local restaurant for years and selflessly sharing all your love with them, you feel like your in a relationship. They have a responsibility to you as their loyal partner not to just pack up all their things and leave you in the middle of the night with no forwarding address, no reasons why and no explanations. Like a jilted lover, you'll be nursing a broken heart and wondering what you did wrong for the rest of your life. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:13 yes It's no longer safe to hang out in Lesbian bars late at night. Wild animals are on the loose and they're out stalking their prey. They're looking for young, hot girls that will eventually cost them a lot of money. Keep you eyes open and be on the lookout for...cougars. 13 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer AE8F5D88-65D8-413B-8022-88175F359FD0 183 Go Cougars! It's no longer safe to hang out in Lesbian bars late at night. Wild animals are on the loose and they're out stalking their prey. They're looking for young, hot girls that will eventually cost them a lot of money. Keep you eyes open and be on the lookout for...cougars. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:28 yes It's hard to resist the overwhelming allure of the supermarket checkout rags on a good day. To make it even harder, they have to put a huge headline on the paper telling you that they're going to give you the scoop on who's gay in Hollywood today. We compare notes and check of our list of who's queer and who's just going through a phase. 9 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer B0441E50-8191-4195-8D7F-16DF4812B21B 182 Who's Gay Today It's hard to resist the overwhelming allure of the supermarket checkout rags on a good day. To make it even harder, they have to put a huge headline on the paper telling you that they're going to give you the scoop on who's gay in Hollywood today. We compare notes and check of our list of who's queer and who's just going through a phase. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:38 yes We'll all kick the bucket someday. To avoid having your kids sprinkle you all over Disneyland, toss you out into the ocean, wear you as jewelry or snort your ashes, do the responsible thing and make sure you leave explicit instructions about how you want them to deal with your body when you pass. Or, you can just take the chance that you'll spend eternity in some family's home that you don't even know. 6 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 2A55AB40-9ACD-4FFF-9304-BF765F325C5A 181 Burn Baby Burn We'll all kick the bucket someday. To avoid having your kids sprinkle you all over Disneyland, toss you out into the ocean, wear you as jewelry or snort your ashes, do the responsible thing and make sure you leave explicit instructions about how you want them to deal with your body when you pass. Or, you can just take the chance that you'll spend eternity in some family's home that you don't even know. 2 Homos lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:36 yes A new TV show causes Roxanne to lose touch with reality and fancy herself the young hot Lesbian of her youth. Or, it could just be the initial stages of her mid-life crisis coming on. Virginia realizes it's time for an intervention. 1 Jul 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-07-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer CB05FC7E-8572-4141-86AB-0EB165238AA6 180 Fantasy Girls A new TV show causes Roxanne to lose touch with reality and fancy herself the young hot Lesbian of her youth. Or, it could just be the initial stages of her mid-life crisis coming on. Virginia realizes it's time for an intervention. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:02 yes For as hot and steamed up as we were last weekend, you would have thought that the entire cast of the L Word, accompnied by the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders and the Laker Girls were spending the night at our house. Alas, we were not so lucky. Instead, the power went out right in the middle of the worst heatwave of the summer. 27 Jun 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-06-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 17B5CC74-C68C-442C-B2A7-51926468CE57 179 Smokin' Hot For as hot and steamed up as we were last weekend, you would have thought that the entire cast of the L Word, accompnied by the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders and the Laker Girls were spending the night at our house. Alas, we were not so lucky. Instead, the power went out right in the middle of the worst heatwave of the summer. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 15:45 yes If you can dream it, you can be it. It's never too late to live your life the way you want to live it, and to have the career you've always dreamed of. This time...nobody's gonna hold you back. It's time to live your life and get rich doing it! 24 Jun 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-06-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 4EDAFAFB-6580-447D-ABB2-1E596799E63F 178 Think and Grow Rich If you can dream it, you can be it. It's never too late to live your life the way you want to live it, and to have the career you've always dreamed of. This time...nobody's gonna hold you back. It's time to live your life and get rich doing it! 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:33 yes Do your part to support the economy. When that tax rebate check hits your mailbox, head to your nearest democratic or republican national convention and spend money the way it was supposed to be spent...by hiring prostitutes and renting hotel rooms. Good times are guaranteed for all. 20 Jun 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-06-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 93EE6CB7-6760-4086-936B-28374073A4DC 177 Boosting the Economy Do your part to support the economy. When that tax rebate check hits your mailbox, head to your nearest democratic or republican national convention and spend money the way it was supposed to be spent...by hiring prostitutes and renting hotel rooms. Good times are guaranteed for all. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:25 yes Women come in a variety of unique shapes, sizes and colors, and every one of them is beautiful in her own special way. Of course, there's no harm in trying on a Chic Shaper to make that special way just a little more special. 17 Jun 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-06-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer E0B6DE9F-F721-4D45-9503-779118F58E16 176 Chic Shaper Women come in a variety of unique shapes, sizes and colors, and every one of them is beautiful in her own special way. Of course, there's no harm in trying on a Chic Shaper to make that special way just a little more special. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:23 yes All those girls who desperately wanted to make it onto the cheerleading squad in high school, but were just a bit too plump to be accepted by the other mean girls have finally found a place they can call their own. It's called Weight Watchers. Now they have all become meeting leaders so they can jump and yell to pump you up and cheer you on as the pounds fall off. 14 Jun 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-06-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt, dyke, homosexual, queer 94F41EC1-EC3D-4C49-B092-D1F12076806D 175 The Biggest Losers All those girls who desperately wanted to make it onto the cheerleading squad in high school, but were just a bit too plump to be accepted by the other mean girls have finally found a place they can call their own. It's called Weight Watchers. Now they have all become meeting leaders so they can jump and yell to pump you up and cheer you on as the pounds fall off. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 16:14 yes Let's not get crazy...it just seems like forever.....but, we're back now. All the rumors about us being dead or having given up are all false. Besides, we already told you that we're too old and lazy to break up. Lord knows the bitch wouldn't ever be able to move all her shit out anyway. 13 Jun 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-06-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A43BC98F-DD25-4289-8279-F30FB46D6B67 174 Not Dead Yet Let's not get crazy...it just seems like forever.....but, we're back now. All the rumors about us being dead or having given up are all false. Besides, we already told you that we're too old and lazy to break up. Lord knows the bitch wouldn't ever be able to move all her shit out anyway. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 07:34 yes For the second time in the last five years the great state of California has made it legal for gay couples to get married. It's time to hide your pets, your young children and your vegetables, because the next thing that will happen is that gay people will want to marry those, too. That is...until next November when the people of this great state try to pass a constitutional amendment to strike it down. 19 May 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-05-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt F99EDCB9-056B-4959-995E-82AFD5A594B2 173 Girl Scouting The Girl Scouts...teaching young women everywhere how to swim, how to sleep in large tents with other women, how to sing folk songs around the campfire on an acoustic guitar, how to shower out in the open with other girls...and how to do whatever it takes to sell more than 17 thousand boxes of cookies in the grocery store parking lot. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:44 yes For the second time in the last five years the great state of California has made it legal for gay couples to get married. It's time to hide your pets, your young children and your vegetables, because the next thing that will happen is that gay people will want to marry those, too. That is...until next November when the people of this great state try to pass a constitutional amendment to strike it down. 16 May 2008 14:53:59 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-05-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7E3C042C-E8BB-4049-9EEF-51EE5B73F915 172 Shotgun Wedding For the second time in the last five years the great state of California has made it legal for gay couples to get married. It's time to hide your pets, your young children and your vegetables, because the next thing that will happen is that gay people will want to marry those, too. That is...until next November when the people of this great state try to pass a constitutional amendment to strike it down. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 12:05 yes It must be some kind of cruel joke in the universe when there are beautiful young ladies who are as flat as an ironing board and then there are grown men with torpedo tit man boobs all living on the same planet. At least we now have a name for it....moobies. 7 May 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-05-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 0E7D3B57-01FF-41EB-AB05-03B43F74146E 171 Man Boobs It must be some kind of cruel joke in the universe when there are beautiful young ladies who are as flat as an ironing board and then there are grown men with torpedo tit man boobs all living on the same planet. At least we now have a name for it....moobies. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:48 yes New at Target this season...Garanimals for office decorating. All you do is match the animal shapes on the tags of all the office products you need and you won't have to worry about color schemes and whether or not things match ever again. The Office Garanimals collection includes everything from staplers, office chairs, wall art, area rugs, to conference tables. 4 May 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-05-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt FDC1D8C6-BF82-41E3-A1F9-2236CBEFB5DD 170 Office Space New at Target this season...Garanimals for office decorating. All you do is match the animal shapes on the tags of all the office products you need and you won't have to worry about color schemes and whether or not things match ever again. The Office Garanimals collection includes everything from staplers, office chairs, wall art, area rugs, to conference tables. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:12 yes Should you have multiple wives or just get whores...it's a tough choice. Sister wives are there whenever you need them, they take care of the kids all day, but then you have to deal with all of them PMS'ing at the same time. Whores come over only whenever you need them, you pay them only for the time they're with you, but you always take the risk of picking up a new STD when they come over. Either way...it's going to cost you a lot of money. 29 Apr 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-04-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt BA349BE3-2FCE-4E51-96A7-5E0646D5C182 169 Sister Wives Should you have multiple wives or just get whores...it's a tough choice. Sister wives are there whenever you need them, they take care of the kids all day, but then you have to deal with all of them PMS'ing at the same time. Whores come over only whenever you need them, you pay them only for the time they're with you, but you always take the risk of picking up a new STD when they come over. Either way...it's going to cost you a lot of money. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:02 yes Sorry guys...this one had to be done. All the men may want to tune out right now as we talk about the collateral damage that takes place from having to menstruate every month. Think of all the good Lesbians could do in the world if we didn't have to spend money on period supplies, fill up landfills with used tampons and pads, and spread PMS hate and anger across the planet once a month. 16 Apr 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-04-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt DE5E1FAE-076F-4776-93F1-19827376637B 168 Aunt Flow Sorry guys...this one had to be done. All the men may want to tune out right now as we talk about the collateral damage that takes place from having to menstruate every month. Think of all the good Lesbians could do in the world if we didn't have to spend money on period supplies, fill up landfills with used tampons and pads, and spread PMS hate and anger across the planet once a month. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:51 yes Physicians in ancient India were doing reconstructive work using skin grafts as early as the 8th century BC. In 1855, English inventor, Alexander Parkes, created the earliest form of plastic. In 2006, nearly 11 million plastic surgeries were performed in the U.S. alone. One can only imagine how many tries it took to get the nipple to look just right after plastic breast implants. 16 Apr 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-04-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 346688F6-11A2-4F70-A46E-C65D4A216CFE 167 The Miracle of Plastic Physicians in ancient India were doing reconstructive work using skin grafts as early as the 8th century BC. In 1855, English inventor, Alexander Parkes, created the earliest form of plastic. In 2006, nearly 11 million plastic surgeries were performed in the U.S. alone. One can only imagine how many tries it took to get the nipple to look just right after plastic breast implants. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:41 yes Karma is a serious bitch. It's nature's way of making sure that no bad deed goes unpunished and making sure that everything gets set right in the world so that things are always in balance. Unfortunately, she also has a wicked sense of humor...and she likes to laugh. 9 Apr 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-04-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 96B5FD5F-D170-446E-AEEF-CB52E751B0BB 166 Bad Karma Karma is a serious bitch. It's nature's way of making sure that no bad deed goes unpunished and making sure that everything gets set right in the world so that things are always in balance. Unfortunately, she also has a wicked sense of humor...and she likes to laugh. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 17:27 yes They may not want us to get married, they may not want us to teach their children, they may not want us to live in their neighborhood or go to their churches. But, when it comes to collecting taxes, you can be sure that the American government doesn't care what you believe in or who you choose to spend your life with. They still want as much of your money as they can possibly get on April 15. 6 Apr 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-04-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 30362F58-2006-4199-8910-25FDFB2A3D43 165 The Tax Man They may not want us to get married, they may not want us to teach their children, they may not want us to live in their neighborhood or go to their churches. But, when it comes to collecting taxes, you can be sure that the American government doesn't care what you believe in or who you choose to spend your life with. They still want as much of your money as they can possibly get on April 15. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:45 yes There are moments in life that take you by surprise, that take your breath away, and make you realize something about yourself that you never knew before. It's those moments in life that make us realize that maybe we're not as adventurous and open-minded as we thought we were. When it comes right down to it...we're really just plain vanilla after all. 3 Apr 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-04-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt F90EF2FB-DA18-4C2D-9540-364B9056956E 164 Splosh! There are moments in life that take you by surprise, that take your breath away, and make you realize something about yourself that you never knew before. It's those moments in life that make us realize that maybe we're not as adventurous and open-minded as we thought we were. When it comes right down to it...we're really just plain vanilla after all. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:41 yes Some say that the third time is lucky. Others say that bad luck comes in threes. If you're planning to travel to Las Vegas or anywhere in Southern California in the next couple of months you may want to re-think your plans. If we buy tickets in our third attempt to try and break the hex to see "Mamma Mia", it's possible that there may be a natural disaster of monumental proportions just to make sure we don't see it. 30 Mar 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-03-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 47DCAE79-5ADF-4FDE-A780-EB455573385B 163 Three Strikes Some say that the third time is lucky. Others say that bad luck comes in threes. If you're planning to travel to Las Vegas or anywhere in Southern California in the next couple of months you may want to re-think your plans. If we buy tickets in our third attempt to try and break the hex to see "Mamma Mia", it's possible that there may be a natural disaster of monumental proportions just to make sure we don't see it. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:27 yes If it got lost...it's going to be found. Somebody, somewhere will pick up the stripper heel that you left by the side of the road. Even if you think you lost your period forever, you can still get pregnant. There is only one simple exception to this golden rule, however, and that's your virginity. That's never coming back. 24 Mar 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-03-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 4CF631B7-5F63-4E3D-994A-C7FCCDC2F83E 162 Lost and Found If it got lost...it's going to be found. Somebody, somewhere will pick up the stripper heel that you left by the side of the road. Even if you think you lost your period forever, you can still get pregnant. There is only one simple exception to this golden rule, however, and that's your virginity. That's never coming back. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 11:09 yes Next year when February 13 rolls around, don't forget to honor that special woman in your life. She's the one who really understands you, she pays attention to you, she knows exactly what you need even before you do and she knows how to make you feel good. Best of all, she's the one who will actually let you try all those funky positions your wife just rolls her eyes about. Take time out to show her how special she really is by buying her flowers on Mistress Day at the same time you buy your wife flowers for Valentine's Day. 21 Mar 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-03-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1C252A5A-78E8-4272-9482-9E7004ABFB11 161 Happy Mistress Day Next year when February 13 rolls around, don't forget to honor that special woman in your life. She's the one who really understands you, she pays attention to you, she knows exactly what you need even before you do and she knows how to make you feel good. Best of all, she's the one who will actually let you try all those funky positions your wife just rolls her eyes about. Take time out to show her how special she really is by buying her flowers on Mistress Day at the same time you buy your wife flowers for Valentine's Day. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:47 yes When Eileen Chaiken decides to retire "The L Word" after next season, we're ready to step in and take over. We've already assembled a cast of writers...and we know exactly what the next plot lines will be. Once again, we're there when you need us. 18 Mar 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-03-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 50DB2496-F47C-4706-A1E1-FA53D9A3CF2D 160 What the "L" When Eileen Chaiken decides to retire "The L Word" after next season, we're ready to step in and take over. We've already assembled a cast of writers...and we know exactly what the next plot lines will be. Once again, we're there when you need us. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 14:28 yes It could happen... Two ordinary Lesbians might just wind up with the girliest little girl on the planet. She may be into lipstick, dresses, heels and everything "princess". The worst part is that she may not even want blue jeans and fleece to ever adorn her body! Not to worry...we have the way to balance out the universe once again and put the world back at peace. It's Lesbian Barbie. 15 Mar 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-03-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 13803321-32F1-4816-9983-271C50456C96 159 Lesbian Barbie It could happen... Two ordinary Lesbians might just wind up with the girliest little girl on the planet. She may be into lipstick, dresses, heels and everything "princess". The worst part is that she may not even want blue jeans and fleece to ever adorn her body! Not to worry...we have the way to balance out the universe once again and put the world back at peace. It's Lesbian Barbie. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:11 yes Nancy's mom hears about (but does not hear) the show about the Cosmo magazine and finds us another magazine that any normal, young Lesbian would be interested in reviewing. It brings back memories of childhood. 9 Mar 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-03-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt AA1DEFCB-918B-4197-B61D-E9575DBBD831 158 Where's Waldo Nancy's mom hears about (but does not hear) the show about the Cosmo magazine and finds us another magazine that any normal, young Lesbian would be interested in reviewing. It brings back memories of childhood. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 10:31 yes Growing up, mother always told you it was a good thing to share. If you had something that somebody else didn't have, it was a virtue to give a little to someone else. The concept she never really got around to explaining, however, was about oversharing. That's just one we had to figure out for ourselves. 6 Mar 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-03-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 79280238-D91B-485B-B018-4C3906749357 157 Over Share Growing up, mother always told you it was a good thing to share. If you had something that somebody else didn't have, it was a virtue to give a little to someone else. The concept she never really got around to explaining, however, was about oversharing. That's just one we had to figure out for ourselves. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:14 yes The Cosmo magazine that hasn't left the house yet become an endless source of fascination and irritation for Roxanne as she takes a look at some of the other articles. For Virginia it sparks the idea for a new money-making adventure - publishing the new Lesbian magazine...Lesbopolitan. 27 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1A48A793-5166-40BE-85BF-5470E7D05E71 156 Lesbopolitan The Cosmo magazine that hasn't left the house yet become an endless source of fascination and irritation for Roxanne as she takes a look at some of the other articles. For Virginia it sparks the idea for a new money-making adventure - publishing the new Lesbian magazine...Lesbopolitan. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:45 yes Fact: Most straight women have never seen a Va-Jay-Jay ever...including their own. That's why they need Cosmopolitan magazine to tell them all about it. Of course, they can just save the $4.95 and talk to a Lesbian instead. 24 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 2EF2E2E1-DC54-4667-9DA4-CB1848AA4B73 155 Lesbians Know Va-Jay-Jays Fact: Most straight women have never seen a Va-Jay-Jay ever...including their own. That's why they need Cosmopolitan magazine to tell them all about it. Of course, they can just save the $4.95 and talk to a Lesbian instead. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 13:46 yes As Lesbians, we feel that it's our birthright to demand...and get...good, hard-rocking Melissa Etheridge songs. We'll do whatever it takes to get Melissa into that angry, depressed place that all those good songs come from. We'll even take the time to slip some lacy g-string underwear laced with perfume into Tammy's car if that's what's required. 21 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 963DFFB0-6DF9-4C5C-A9FC-2671BB73F163 154 Sweet Melissa As Lesbians, we feel that it's our birthright to demand...and get...good, hard-rocking Melissa Etheridge songs. We'll do whatever it takes to get Melissa into that angry, depressed place that all those good songs come from. We'll even take the time to slip some lacy g-string underwear laced with perfume into Tammy's car if that's what's required. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homosexual, homos, 2homos 09:46 yes A special hand-picked card from the grocery store, $2.95. Gas to drive home early from work, $4.00. A romantic dinner at the pizza place down the street, $16. The sincere look of love and appreciation in my soul-mate's eyes when she unwraps a video game for Valentine's day...priceless. Ad on Craig's List to get a new girlfriend, free. 18 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A30DCA06-6375-4D6B-A0DC-653F380D54A3 153 Valentine to Remember A special hand-picked card from the grocery store, $2.95. Gas to drive home early from work, $4.00. A romantic dinner at the pizza place down the street, $16. The sincere look of love and appreciation in my soul-mate's eyes when she unwraps a video game for Valentine's day...priceless. Ad on Craig's List to get a new girlfriend, free. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:45 yes It's election time in the States. This year, get out and make your vote count (unlike Roxanne's). It gives you the right to go out and bitch about everything you don't like. 15 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt DED4D902-CC27-45E6-839F-5E35BBC4F46F 152 Get Out & Vote It's election time in the States. This year, get out and make your vote count (unlike Roxanne's). It gives you the right to go out and bitch about everything you don't like. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 08:03 yes The days of using Chapstick as lipstick and hanging around the Rite-Aid counter waiting for someone to help you learn how to apply makeup are over. Roxanne tells all as she explains how she learned to put on makeup and primp like a girl. So, tuck in that t-shirt, put on a belt and find out how to become an instant femme. 11 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 30043083-69D7-4600-B1C9-EE500A6E6504 151 Instant Femme The days of using Chapstick as lipstick and hanging around the Rite-Aid counter waiting for someone to help you learn how to apply makeup are over. Roxanne tells all as she explains how she learned to put on makeup and primp like a girl. So, tuck in that t-shirt, put on a belt and find out how to become an instant femme. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:25 yes When you go out on a little shopping excursion, the last thing you expect to see is a minefield of dog crap throughout the store. It's the quickest way to turn a delightful afternoon into a skid mark hazard with the potential for a deadly slip and fall. 7 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt B97186B8-98DD-4FD6-ADEF-7CB975E100B4 150 Skid Marks When you go out on a little shopping excursion, the last thing you expect to see is a minefield of dog crap throughout the store. It's the quickest way to turn a delightful afternoon into a skid mark hazard with the potential for a deadly slip and fall. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:21 yes People are dirty, filthy pigs. They go to the bathroom to take a crap, they don't wash their hands, they bake cakes and make food for potlucks, and then they bring it in to work to share with their co-workers. All the while they're busy spreading around infectious diseases and handing out viruses like it's candy. 4 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7BAE0663-0A3E-48E3-A893-07F7CE676A6E 149 Super Bug People are dirty, filthy pigs. They go to the bathroom to take a crap, they don't wash their hands, they bake cakes and make food for potlucks, and then they bring it in to work to share with their co-workers. All the while they're busy spreading around infectious diseases and handing out viruses like it's candy. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:36 yes We take a departure from our normal routine to save the world from from tripping out at work and growing ox balls because you bought the wrong energy drink. We've done all the hard work for you and wound up staying up all night as a result, so that you don't have to waste your hard-earned two dollars and fifty cents on something that looks, tastes and smells like piss. 1 Feb 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-02-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt FBAFFB98-A579-4E27-BB68-241447F3A5C7 148 High Energy Taste Test We take a departure from our normal routine to save the world from from tripping out at work and growing ox balls because you bought the wrong energy drink. We've done all the hard work for you and wound up staying up all night as a result, so that you don't have to waste your hard-earned two dollars and fifty cents on something that looks, tastes and smells like piss. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 14:28 yes A little nip here... a little tuck there. With the miracle of modern medicine we'll soon be able to live in a time where you can pick out a picture from a book in a doctor's office and leave with Lindsay Lohan's va-jay-jay as your very own. 29 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbtedy 21D6BCF8-BE20-49B4-A961-C32BB2689252 147 Re-Vaguvination A little nip here... a little tuck there. With the miracle of modern medicine we'll soon be able to live in a time where you can pick out a picture from a book in a doctor's office and leave with Lindsay Lohan's va-jay-jay as your very own. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:42 yes With the Hollywood writers stike in full effect, there's no better way to fill up all that dead TV air time than to take a bunch of D-list celebrities, throw them into rehab and point a camera at them. Don't forget the gallon sized Ziploc bags. 26 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy 8671B6D4-6C4F-4608-B4EF-E1B39B4298FD 146 Rehab With The D-List With the Hollywood writers stike in full effect, there's no better way to fill up all that dead TV air time than to take a bunch of D-list celebrities, throw them into rehab and point a camera at them. Don't forget the gallon sized Ziploc bags. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:59 yes After a double dose of PMS, we're back with something we're really good at...advice! If there is one thing that is absolutely certain in this life, it's that we have an opinion about everything. We're also happy to share it...whether you asked for it or not. 23 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt C30F55EF-0695-4C7F-8B62-F43761010E11 145 Dear Homos After a double dose of PMS, we're back with something we're really good at...advice! If there is one thing that is absolutely certain in this life, it's that we have an opinion about everything. We're also happy to share it...whether you asked for it or not. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:29 yes Going to the post office is not that complicated. You only have a few different options of things you can do there. You can send a letter, pick up some mail or buy some stamps. You would think that most people probably know what they're going there before they even get to the post office. Yet people still get up to the window and stand there staring at the post office clerk wondering what to do, while the line gets longer and longer and people get angrier and angrier...including the post office workers. 17 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt C65746E2-FF61-4D45-9A79-3535455077C8 144 Going Postal Going to the post office is not that complicated. You only have a few different options of things you can do there. You can send a letter, pick up some mail or buy some stamps. You would think that most people probably know what they're going there before they even get to the post office. Yet people still get up to the window and stand there staring at the post office clerk wondering what to do, while the line gets longer and longer and people get angrier and angrier...including the post office workers. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:17 yes It's almost tax time. That means that you need to start pulling out all your receipts and paperwork, desperately trying to find enough deductions and tax credits so that you don't go bankrupt on April 15. This year, rather than giving all your hard-earned money to the tax man, why not start you own "church" instead? 14 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 5B46746D-926B-44C9-8385-73A4E4F4669B 143 Your Very Own Cult It's almost tax time. That means that you need to start pulling out all your receipts and paperwork, desperately trying to find enough deductions and tax credits so that you don't go bankrupt on April 15. This year, rather than giving all your hard-earned money to the tax man, why not start you own "church" instead? 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 16:32 yes Red flags dot the hillside, blowing and flapping madly in the wind. Still, we pay no heed and rush right into relationships with all kinds of psychos. If only we had someone to show us the warning signs to look for before we make bad dating choices.... Well, now you do. We've already made all those bad choices and lived to tell about it. 11 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 44D3382A-BFAD-4C64-AA3B-685FD3105C7C 142 Red Flag Warning Red flags dot the hillside, blowing and flapping madly in the wind. Still, we pay no heed and rush right into relationships with all kinds of psychos. If only we had someone to show us the warning signs to look for before we make bad dating choices.... Well, now you do. We've already made all those bad choices and lived to tell about it. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 19:53 yes Flirting makes you smarter. Or, at least you'll seem smarter all of a sudden next to the person you're flirting with. After all, there's really not enough room for too many brain cells in that little head that they're doing the thinking with now. 8 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt BF884B24-71F8-402B-8A62-7950FC3FF7C2 141 Flirt Flirting makes you smarter. Or, at least you'll seem smarter all of a sudden next to the person you're flirting with. After all, there's really not enough room for too many brain cells in that little head that they're doing the thinking with now. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:35 yes It could just be an ordinary trip to the doctor's office for a checkup, or it could be your ultimate Penthouse Forum fantasy. Either way, don't forget to schedule your annual mammogram this year. 5 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 64B50159-9219-4DB2-A65D-B0D9B2BFEFF1 140 Not Quite a Handful It could just be an ordinary trip to the doctor's office for a checkup, or it could be your ultimate Penthouse Forum fantasy. Either way, don't forget to schedule your annual mammogram this year. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:11 yes Welcome to a brand new year. As we ring out the old and bring in the new, it's the perfect time to make a whole bunch of New Year's resolutions that you'll never be able to keep. Well...it was a good thought anyway. 2 Jan 2008 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2008-01-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt BEB86943-C6C3-4AFF-89F1-BFFE6BB8520C 139 Brand New You in 2008 Welcome to a brand new year. As we ring out the old and bring in the new, it's the perfect time to make a whole bunch of New Year's resolutions that you'll never be able to keep. Well...it was a good thought anyway. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 15:09 yes As the year 2007 winds down, everyone will have a list of the best movies, the best books, the best music, the best things they ate...and hundreds of other things they liked and diskliked about this year. We'll take you through a much more practical list instead. It's our list of the biggest pet peeves of all time. 29 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 38ECA7CC-4497-4EBA-B7F6-A9C494A40B55 138 Pet Peeves As the year 2007 winds down, everyone will have a list of the best movies, the best books, the best music, the best things they ate...and hundreds of other things they liked and diskliked about this year. We'll take you through a much more practical list instead. It's our list of the biggest pet peeves of all time. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 00:00 yes It may be hard to believe that Lesbian couples would break up at all, especially since you knew you would marry her and be together forever after the second date...or maybe the third date for the committment phobic. Stranger things have certainly happened, so it's best to be prepared in advance...just in case. You want to be ready if you decide to break into her house to get back all the gifts you ever gave her, or if you just simply want to drain the joint bank account ahead of time. 26 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 4A8E68F0-D64A-4244-9DE0-F6E2994C3ED0 137 Lesbian Breakup Etiquette It may be hard to believe that Lesbian couples would break up at all, especially since you knew you would marry her and be together forever after the second date...or maybe the third date for the committment phobic. Stranger things have certainly happened, so it's best to be prepared in advance...just in case. You want to be ready if you decide to break into her house to get back all the gifts you ever gave her, or if you just simply want to drain the joint bank account ahead of time. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 00:00 yes Straight Men: 1, Lesbians: 0. We just can't help ourselves in doing one more show about Tila Tequila and "Shot at Love" after the season finale. If there's one thing we learned after wasting that much of our lives in front of the TV, it's....ladies, please, no white shoes after Labor Day. No good can come of it. 23 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A5C91B86-EF67-4498-853D-F02FC2E5C0A8 136 Another Shot at Tila Straight Men: 1, Lesbians: 0. We just can't help ourselves in doing one more show about Tila Tequila and "Shot at Love" after the season finale. If there's one thing we learned after wasting that much of our lives in front of the TV, it's....ladies, please, no white shoes after Labor Day. No good can come of it. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 00:00 yes This year when the boss asks you to complete a self-evaluation for your annual performance review so that they can figure out what you've been doing all year, make sure you let them know that you've been the Employee of the Year. Be sure to rate yourself "excellent" in every category. Who cares if you've been late to work almost every day, you leave early, you don't get anything done on time and you're generally a pain in the ass to everyone in the office. Make sure that that the hour you spend completing your review is worth the hour of your life you'll never get back by wasting your time on this crap. 19 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 68EAEA12-8C52-432D-A049-2890206082D7 135 Employee of the Year This year when the boss asks you to complete a self-evaluation for your annual performance review so that they can figure out what you've been doing all year, make sure you let them know that you've been the Employee of the Year. Be sure to rate yourself "excellent" in every category. Who cares if you've been late to work almost every day, you leave early, you don't get anything done on time and you're generally a pain in the ass to everyone in the office. Make sure that that the hour you spend completing your review is worth the hour of your life you'll never get back by wasting your time on this crap. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:34 yes Back when we were young kids, mom would always warn us not to touch sharp or dangerous objects. Of course, we would ignore her, get hurt and then cry until she gave us a lollipop to make it all feel better. Now that we're adults, it's clear that we haven't learned anything at all. We still ignore mother's stern warnings and can't stop ourselves from playing with sharp, shiny objects in the kitchen. It's a good thing there's a hospital not too far away. 16 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 4EBB6D74-F407-46A7-9B46-C6D04723E4FD 134 Knife Snob Back when we were young kids, mom would always warn us not to touch sharp or dangerous objects. Of course, we would ignore her, get hurt and then cry until she gave us a lollipop to make it all feel better. Now that we're adults, it's clear that we haven't learned anything at all. We still ignore mother's stern warnings and can't stop ourselves from playing with sharp, shiny objects in the kitchen. It's a good thing there's a hospital not too far away. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:16 yes Everyone has bad breath once in a while. We've all had woken up in the morning and had our breath smell like ass...maybe you had too much garlic at lunch...or maybe you just smoke cigarettes. But when you have to drive down the freeway in the middle of winter with the car window wide open and your head hanging out like a dog because the person next to you has insane halitosis...that's just ridiculous. 13 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt ED92517F-A574-4904-9FC2-D9DFC29C56C0 133 They Breathe Among Us Everyone has bad breath once in a while. We've all had woken up in the morning and had our breath smell like ass...maybe you had too much garlic at lunch...or maybe you just smoke cigarettes. But when you have to drive down the freeway in the middle of winter with the car window wide open and your head hanging out like a dog because the person next to you has insane halitosis...that's just ridiculous. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:57 yes Leave it to Hallmark to make sure that you always have a reason to buy cards and gifts in any month of the year, for almost anyone you know, for almost any reason at all. When "Bosses Day" comes around, make sure you run out and get a gift for someone who makes eight times as much money as you do...and who you probably don't like anyway. 9 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7A123311-3229-4280-A98B-4C403BCD4E9C 132 Fake Holidays Leave it to Hallmark to make sure that you always have a reason to buy cards and gifts in any month of the year, for almost anyone you know, for almost any reason at all. When "Bosses Day" comes around, make sure you run out and get a gift for someone who makes eight times as much money as you do...and who you probably don't like anyway. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:48 yes God loves Lesbians, but he doesn't like rock music. In fact, simply listening to rock music has been proven to make people display homosexual tendencies. Not to worry... we'll take you through the official list of bands whose music you should immediately go out and buy so that you can stop other people from listening to them and having them become homosexuals, too. 6 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt AA378DC2-E984-4B77-ABC1-2C065F90B700 131 God Loves Lesbians God loves Lesbians, but he doesn't like rock music. In fact, simply listening to rock music has been proven to make people display homosexual tendencies. Not to worry... we'll take you through the official list of bands whose music you should immediately go out and buy so that you can stop other people from listening to them and having them become homosexuals, too. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:47 yes It's time for another relaxing evening in front of the TV. Well...that is until "Something About Miriam" comes on. It's kind of like "The Bachelorette"....except for the special surprise that Miram has in store for the unknowing bachelors. As usual, Roxanne has an opinion. 3 Dec 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-12-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1B89E61C-BDDE-46AF-9F01-B0602267A09B 130 The Crying Game Redux It's time for another relaxing evening in front of the TV. Well...that is until "Something About Miriam" comes on. It's kind of like "The Bachelorette"....except for the special surprise that Miram has in store for the unknowing bachelors. As usual, Roxanne has an opinion. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:35 yes With the holiday season upon us, you may be wrapped up in trying to find the perfect gift for everyone on your list. This year, instead of getting a gift card for the local pharmacy for the whore on your list to help her clear up her latest infection, why not let us help you instead. We'll help you pick out the perfect gift for everyone on your list...no matter if they've been naughty or nice this year. 30 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 818B2E75-E044-45BD-80B6-37DC6C5472A7 129 Better to Give Than Receive With the holiday season upon us, you may be wrapped up in trying to find the perfect gift for everyone on your list. This year, instead of getting a gift card for the local pharmacy for the whore on your list to help her clear up her latest infection, why not let us help you instead. We'll help you pick out the perfect gift for everyone on your list...no matter if they've been naughty or nice this year. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:13 yes Now that the market is flooded with relatively low-priced GPS navigational systems, there is no excuse for anyone to get lost while driving ever again. But, there is one important thing missing. It's the attitude you get from your navigator when you make a wrong turn or head the wrong way. If someone can create a downloadable set of new voices with some attitude and personality for the GPS, I'm ready to download it from i-Tunes right now. 27 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt DF973D73-E289-4629-AFCC-E1BF4A94AE69 128 Driving Miss Maggie Now that the market is flooded with relatively low-priced GPS navigational systems, there is no excuse for anyone to get lost while driving ever again. But, there is one important thing missing. It's the attitude you get from your navigator when you make a wrong turn or head the wrong way. If someone can create a downloadable set of new voices with some attitude and personality for the GPS, I'm ready to download it from i-Tunes right now. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:11 yes Freedoms of being an American: When you turn 16 you are allowed to drive. At 18 you are allowed to vote. Turn 21 and you can drink alcohol (legally). We have the freedom of the press, freedom to elect an idiot as president and the freedom of religion. But, now the government is trying to take away the basic freedom to masturbate. We call "bullshit". 24 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 5DDDF68D-D916-4CAE-AB7B-AC53ED7BB03C 127 Everybody Masturbates Freedoms of being an American: When you turn 16 you are allowed to drive. At 18 you are allowed to vote. Turn 21 and you can drink alcohol (legally). We have the freedom of the press, freedom to elect an idiot as president and the freedom of religion. But, now the government is trying to take away the basic freedom to masturbate. We call "bullshit". 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:01 yes So you have your wife, two dogs and house. What else could you possibly need? Hmmm. Oh yeah, the 2.5 kids to make the perfect family. So, now Lesbians can go to the sperm bank and make a withdrawal or they can adopt to make their family complete. Just add kids and stir like crazy for instant family madness. 22 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt E01862C3-4FCA-4628-940D-1DAE57D176FD 126 Lesbian Baby Boom So you have your wife, two dogs and house. What else could you possibly need? Hmmm. Oh yeah, the 2.5 kids to make the perfect family. So, now Lesbians can go to the sperm bank and make a withdrawal or they can adopt to make their family complete. Just add kids and stir like crazy for instant family madness. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:00 yes When one of the dogs jumps up off a chair like a red-hot poker has been shoved up his ass, it can mean only one thing. It must be time to wash the dirty dogs. It's almost as traumatic for the humans as it is for the dogs. 18 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 74889B6D-3488-4000-9555-5E5BC91D698F 125 Dirty Dogs When one of the dogs jumps up off a chair like a red-hot poker has been shoved up his ass, it can mean only one thing. It must be time to wash the dirty dogs. It's almost as traumatic for the humans as it is for the dogs. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 08:14 yes You're all tucked in and ready for a good night's sleep, when suddenly...you realize you're not alone. A colony of bed bugs has invaded you're mattress and they don't have plans to leave any time soon. You'll have to burn the house down to get rid of those disgusting, free-loading, good for nothing bastards. 14 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 8AE330D6-F563-4099-9360-1FAB5718DB6D 124 Sleeping Around You're all tucked in and ready for a good night's sleep, when suddenly...you realize you're not alone. A colony of bed bugs has invaded you're mattress and they don't have plans to leave any time soon. You'll have to burn the house down to get rid of those disgusting, free-loading, good for nothing bastards. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:40 yes It may only be November 11, but if your holiday shopping is not done by next weekend, you are in big touble. There will be no more messing around, no more waiting to the last minute and no more excuses. You've had 10 months already to get it done. That's it. 11 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 465FF636-28ED-46F6-8B5F-D23E812D0EA5 123 Holiday Shopping Mania It may only be November 11, but if your holiday shopping is not done by next weekend, you are in big touble. There will be no more messing around, no more waiting to the last minute and no more excuses. You've had 10 months already to get it done. That's it. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:10 yes Crazy has it's own special way of reaching out to let you know it's there. It's more than just a look or a feeling...it's something far deeper and more insidious that grips you and pulls you in. It's a good thing Virginia's in a relationship, because even on TV, she can still find "crazy" without even trying. Danger lurks everywhere. 8 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 109AE538-DA43-46DC-A5CB-BD9467B4FE61 122 Hey, Girl, Hey Crazy has it's own special way of reaching out to let you know it's there. It's more than just a look or a feeling...it's something far deeper and more insidious that grips you and pulls you in. It's a good thing Virginia's in a relationship, because even on TV, she can still find "crazy" without even trying. Danger lurks everywhere. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, 2homos 11:46 yes If a big motorhome comes driving up to your house one day, don't get too excited. Run and close all the windows, draw all the curtains and lock the doors. It might not be that you're a winner in the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. You might just be the next contestant on the Suzanne Westenhoefer reality series, "How the Fcuk Don't You Know?!" 4 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 6A14D119-3AED-4085-BB87-D70F740420D8 121 How the Hell Don't You Know If a big motorhome comes driving up to your house one day, don't get too excited. Run and close all the windows, draw all the curtains and lock the doors. It might not be that you're a winner in the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. You might just be the next contestant on the Suzanne Westenhoefer reality series, "How the Fcuk Don't You Know?!" 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:29 yes Believe it or not, today's seniors may be having more sex than you. That's not a bad thing, either. For us it means we have another option for making money in our retirement. We can open up a sex toy shop right next to the senior community and make lots of money. When the nursing home is rockin'.....don't come a knockin'. 1 Nov 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-11-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 0EC56C3D-3B10-43E1-AC73-9E902F68A49B 120 Grandma Thinks She's Sexy Believe it or not, today's seniors may be having more sex than you. That's not a bad thing, either. For us it means we have another option for making money in our retirement. We can open up a sex toy shop right next to the senior community and make lots of money. When the nursing home is rockin'.....don't come a knockin'. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:31 yes We trek off to Vegas for the weekend to celebrate Beth's birthday and enjoy a weekend of offensive t-shirts, karaoke and pawn shops. As they say in Vegas, "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas". But, even with that...sometimes you still want the people to just leave and go home. 29 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 776AC0D3-8D88-4AB2-8AEE-2761C2286218 119 Vegas Baby We trek off to Vegas for the weekend to celebrate Beth's birthday and enjoy a weekend of offensive t-shirts, karaoke and pawn shops. As they say in Vegas, "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas". But, even with that...sometimes you still want the people to just leave and go home. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 18:28 yes Anyone who tells you that running is fun and that they get a "runner's high" when they run long distances, is just full of shit. You have permission to tell them so...from someone who knows. 22 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt C5036C49-13FC-4F65-A187-A57F4403EE55 118 Strike it off the List Anyone who tells you that running is fun and that they get a "runner's high" when they run long distances, is just full of shit. You have permission to tell them so...from someone who knows. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:36 yes It's not exactly penis envy...it's more like penis curiosity. If you could take a pill that gave you a penis of your very own for just one day, you need to make sure you get your money's worth out of it. Roxanne's niece, Ashley, joins us for this important topic. We definitely needed the straight girl perspective on this one. 19 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A7236D41-2706-4909-8473-42B92009F579 117 Chick With a Dick It's not exactly penis envy...it's more like penis curiosity. If you could take a pill that gave you a penis of your very own for just one day, you need to make sure you get your money's worth out of it. Roxanne's niece, Ashley, joins us for this important topic. We definitely needed the straight girl perspective on this one. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:52 yes If men had to get the equivalent of a mammogram on their penis once a year, you can be sure that there would all of a sudden be incredible advances in technology. Instead of having your organ squished and squeezed, and flattened out across a set of cold plates the length of the room, men would invent a soft, mouth-shaped cup that would gently grip their penis and move rhythmically back and forth to scan for any abnormalities. Every machine would come equipped with a soft towel for "cleaning up" afterwards. Men would be lining up around the block for their exams. 16 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 62FFCA50-9D64-40F3-BE1C-14D7AD8B32ED 116 I'm Not a Gyno, but I'll Take a Look If men had to get the equivalent of a mammogram on their penis once a year, you can be sure that there would all of a sudden be incredible advances in technology. Instead of having your organ squished and squeezed, and flattened out across a set of cold plates the length of the room, men would invent a soft, mouth-shaped cup that would gently grip their penis and move rhythmically back and forth to scan for any abnormalities. Every machine would come equipped with a soft towel for "cleaning up" afterwards. Men would be lining up around the block for their exams. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:44 yes Lots of different cities and states have a unique claim to fame. In California, the San Fernando Valley is considered the Porn Capital of the World due to the number of studios and production houses cranking out skin flicks. Next time you visit this great state, you can head down to Disneyland to see Pocahontas and then travel to the Valley to see Poke-A-Hot-Ass....all in the same day. 13 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 87A35BA8-F62A-4E01-B3EB-A2C5C5E98857 115 Porn Capital of the World Lots of different cities and states have a unique claim to fame. In California, the San Fernando Valley is considered the Porn Capital of the World due to the number of studios and production houses cranking out skin flicks. Next time you visit this great state, you can head down to Disneyland to see Pocahontas and then travel to the Valley to see Poke-A-Hot-Ass....all in the same day. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:51 yes Mirror, mirror, on the wall...what the fuck is that thing coming out of my face?! After Lasik, Virginia could see the hair on a gnat's ass from 2 miles away. The only downside was that her close-up vision got so bad that she finally had to break down and get a 50x magnification mirror. Now we need therapy to work through the issues of strange hairs popping out on our faces, wrinkles we couldn't see before and dark pores we didn't even know we had. All this due to that evil mirror invented by some sick, cruel sociopath. 10 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 3ED3B04B-3BF2-4E57-A6F1-AEEFCF40C6CA 114 Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall Mirror, mirror, on the wall...what the fuck is that thing coming out of my face?! After Lasik, Virginia could see the hair on a gnat's ass from 2 miles away. The only downside was that her close-up vision got so bad that she finally had to break down and get a 50x magnification mirror. Now we need therapy to work through the issues of strange hairs popping out on our faces, wrinkles we couldn't see before and dark pores we didn't even know we had. All this due to that evil mirror invented by some sick, cruel sociopath. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:57 yes Most people think rats and roaches are disgusting creatures with no purpose in this world. Of course, once they get to know all of the the diseases and disguting things the nasty little vermin called ticks carry around with them, they would be more than happy to live together with the rats and roaches in the same house for the rest of their lives. 7 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 429A2D6F-0268-4E05-BE4A-1BE7ABB1EB6A 113 It's Not Green, It's Lyme Most people think rats and roaches are disgusting creatures with no purpose in this world. Of course, once they get to know all of the the diseases and disguting things the nasty little vermin called ticks carry around with them, they would be more than happy to live together with the rats and roaches in the same house for the rest of their lives. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 18:37 yes Some people think it's fun to be strapped onto a piece of metal that flies through the air, shakes you upside down, hurtles you backwards at the speed of sound and then whips you back around the other way. Bullshit. 4 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7C3E27A5-76B7-449E-BFBA-AD83788A0AC0 112 Gay Day at Six Flags Some people think it's fun to be strapped onto a piece of metal that flies through the air, shakes you upside down, hurtles you backwards at the speed of sound and then whips you back around the other way. Bullshit. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:18 yes In every neighborhood there is the creepy house that you don't want to walk too close to when you go by. You cross the street and keep one eye out for anyone or anything coming out the door. All the while you're ready to run if something happens. I'm proud to say...it's that time of year, and now....that's our house! 1 Oct 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-10-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 0BFA98D7-33AE-4214-8F78-6A0FA72D6D4D 111 The Ghouls Next Door In every neighborhood there is the creepy house that you don't want to walk too close to when you go by. You cross the street and keep one eye out for anyone or anything coming out the door. All the while you're ready to run if something happens. I'm proud to say...it's that time of year, and now....that's our house! 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:28 yes When you don't have time for a long conversation with a hot, sexy girl in person...now you can get screwed by text messaging. You'll never know that you're really texting an old, fat dude in a dirty tank top sitting on his couch with his belly sticking out acting like a hot, horny girl. Now that's enticing. 26 Sep 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 69EF93E3-1201-49B4-9317-9E0FB61F50D2 110 Orgasm by Text Message When you don't have time for a long conversation with a hot, sexy girl in person...now you can get screwed by text messaging. You'll never know that you're really texting an old, fat dude in a dirty tank top sitting on his couch with his belly sticking out acting like a hot, horny girl. Now that's enticing. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 14:46 yes The L.A. County Fair comes to town and we head off for our annual visit. We're not interested in the animals, the horticulture , the carnival rides or the games. Instead, we want to know what this year's fried food specialty will be, and to shop for that rare "As Seen on TV" item that can't be found anywhere else. 23 Sep 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 8E0540C1-4974-4E51-A35B-7F365213271B 109 LA County Fair-y Tale The L.A. County Fair comes to town and we head off for our annual visit. We're not interested in the animals, the horticulture , the carnival rides or the games. Instead, we want to know what this year's fried food specialty will be, and to shop for that rare "As Seen on TV" item that can't be found anywhere else. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:44 yes Virginia is about to become a millionaire. Of course, first she has to take out an insurance policy on Roxanne. After eight years in a relationship, it's time to trade her in for a younger model, and that's going to take a whole lotta cash. 19 Sep 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 355B761F-58D0-4AEB-8CF0-D815BF8C69C3 108 She's Dizzy, Not Ditzy Virginia is about to become a millionaire. Of course, first she has to take out an insurance policy on Roxanne. After eight years in a relationship, it's time to trade her in for a younger model, and that's going to take a whole lotta cash. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:08 yes We do our duty as faithful Lesbians and got to see Jodie Foster's new movie, "The Brave One", on opening day. Jodie wasn't the only brave one on that day. We even forego the popcorn so that we can concentrate on bringing you a complete, detailed movie review. 16 Sep 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7ABC56B1-4882-4F46-AD7E-3F5B9CBDC025 107 Jodie Has A-Cups We do our duty as faithful Lesbians and got to see Jodie Foster's new movie, "The Brave One", on opening day. Jodie wasn't the only brave one on that day. We even forego the popcorn so that we can concentrate on bringing you a complete, detailed movie review. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:50 yes There aren't too many sports where you can drink beer and still play the game. Softball is one...and bowling is another. That makes both of those the perfect sports for Lesbians. 14 Sep 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 179C5334-01A4-4A10-AE80-91641A030E45 106 Do Your Lips Hang Low? There aren't too many sports where you can drink beer and still play the game. Softball is one...and bowling is another. That makes both of those the perfect sports for Lesbians. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:43 yes To help get you through those long, cold months in between seasons of the L Word, Roxanne has come up with a new dramatic series, using real-life characters that everyone can relate to. This Fall...on Skinemax...look for...."Lipstick". Lesbian drama like it was meant to be. 11 Sep 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A647491A-45D2-4D16-B94F-174C4D26F026 105 Lights, Camera, Action To help get you through those long, cold months in between seasons of the L Word, Roxanne has come up with a new dramatic series, using real-life characters that everyone can relate to. This Fall...on Skinemax...look for...."Lipstick". Lesbian drama like it was meant to be. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:38 yes When you come home from a long, hard day at work, it's nice to sit back and relax to ease away the stress of the day. Some people pop open a cold brew, other people entertain themsleves with an evening of TV, and still others might just go to bed early. Then there's the people who relax by picking up whores in video games, having fake sex with them in the game and then paying them with fake money. 8 Sep 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt D64A18FC-C576-44CF-9C34-05DC59EA7FCD 104 Video Game Whore When you come home from a long, hard day at work, it's nice to sit back and relax to ease away the stress of the day. Some people pop open a cold brew, other people entertain themsleves with an evening of TV, and still others might just go to bed early. Then there's the people who relax by picking up whores in video games, having fake sex with them in the game and then paying them with fake money. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:11 yes The high price of gas gives us gas. It also makes it hard to be a proper Lesbian, with a big pick-up truck, oversized tires and a hemi...whatever that is. 5 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-09-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7E00CCAB-EE6E-448A-B182-379BBAAAC48C 103 Feeling Gassy The high price of gas gives us gas. It also makes it hard to be a proper Lesbian, with a big pick-up truck, oversized tires and a hemi...whatever that is. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:07 yes With all the controversey around Senators, famous singers and your everyday joe, Lesbians are questioning how a bathroom can be a sexy locale for a risque interlude with a stranger. 31 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 431A7423-EA72-44E7-912D-CEECE1E0D615 102 The Turd Cast With all the controversey around Senators, famous singers and your everyday joe, Lesbians are questioning how a bathroom can be a sexy locale for a risque interlude with a stranger. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:57 yes These days there's a pill for everything. The only problem is...the cure may be worse than the problem it's meant to get rid of. At least you can choose between slippery stools, gastrointenstinal distress or just nausea and vomiting. 28 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A27A1CC2-2370-44C8-9C62-00AE188DD199 101 Side Effects These days there's a pill for everything. The only problem is...the cure may be worse than the problem it's meant to get rid of. At least you can choose between slippery stools, gastrointenstinal distress or just nausea and vomiting. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:23 yes When it comes time to buy a gift for special someone in your life, you want to make sure you pick out something will love and cherish forever. You want them to remember you each time they look at it, use it or pick it up. This year, for that special girl in your life, why not give her the gift that will remind her of you every time she starts her period? 25 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt CF36E067-2E7C-4CD6-B646-081F160F48C0 100 More Reasons to Celebrate When it comes time to buy a gift for special someone in your life, you want to make sure you pick out something will love and cherish forever. You want them to remember you each time they look at it, use it or pick it up. This year, for that special girl in your life, why not give her the gift that will remind her of you every time she starts her period? 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 12:29 yes It took a crazy (ex-) friend to help us understand that the Internet is really the root of all evil. It will cause you to do bad things such as going into chat rooms to have cyber sex with people you can't see, you'll take on a secret screen name to hide your true identity, and you'll pick up rimming as your new favorite pasttime. 23 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt C2BE2807-CBBD-4C40-902B-DF36360D249F 099 The Root of all Evil It took a crazy (ex-) friend to help us understand that the Internet is really the root of all evil. It will cause you to do bad things such as going into chat rooms to have cyber sex with people you can't see, you'll take on a secret screen name to hide your true identity, and you'll pick up rimming as your new favorite pasttime. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:37 yes Back in the day...life was hard. You had to walk 10 miles inthe snow to get to school, and it was uphill both ways. You had to shovel coal until it was dark just to stay warm in the winter. And, you had to go out hunting for food just so that you could eat. Now you can just go to Costco and stock up on enough bagels to get you through the entire winter without ever having to leave the house again. 20 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 4DBD143D-B5D2-4749-BFE0-74A2B10C7F6B 098 The Simple Life Back in the day...life was hard. You had to walk 10 miles inthe snow to get to school, and it was uphill both ways. You had to shovel coal until it was dark just to stay warm in the winter. And, you had to go out hunting for food just so that you could eat. Now you can just go to Costco and stock up on enough bagels to get you through the entire winter without ever having to leave the house again. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 09:33 yes Some movie reviews are weak. The reviewer doesn't give you a lot of depth about the characters, the plot line or what's good and bad about the show. Not so with us. We may not be professional movie reviewers, but we certainly have an opinion about everything...and everybody. 17 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7427436D-14E6-4447-8139-C703C4B915D7 097 Surf's Up Some movie reviews are weak. The reviewer doesn't give you a lot of depth about the characters, the plot line or what's good and bad about the show. Not so with us. We may not be professional movie reviewers, but we certainly have an opinion about everything...and everybody. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:45 yes "X" marks the spot....the spot where the nuts used to be. For goodness sake, at least have the human decency to pick them up and put them in a jar so that they can be re-attached later on. 15 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt F03A6940-76C7-4D00-B6CC-E172043777A6 096 Case of the Missing Nuts "X" marks the spot....the spot where the nuts used to be. For goodness sake, at least have the human decency to pick them up and put them in a jar so that they can be re-attached later on. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:46 yes It's a subject of endless fascination for us. Somehow it just never gets old. A round of armpit waxing gets us going again on our discussion about unwanted body hair. 12 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 65C53E23-7B7C-4012-9917-16C8BA6FCA7F 095 Pluck It, Wax It, Burn It It's a subject of endless fascination for us. Somehow it just never gets old. A round of armpit waxing gets us going again on our discussion about unwanted body hair. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:53 yes It's time for a serious interlude where we discuss the ones that got away from us, and how we feel about them now. Take a little journey with us and explore your feelings about the past. 9 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 644F57F7-96E1-4880-A81D-274A6A71F720 094 The One That Got Away It's time for a serious interlude where we discuss the ones that got away from us, and how we feel about them now. Take a little journey with us and explore your feelings about the past. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 13:14 yes When you go out to your favorite club to go dancing and you see a couple of older Lesbians out on the dance floor looking like they're having seizures...there's no need to panic. Don't try to stuff a wallet in their mouths to keep them from swallowing their tongues. We're just dusting off their dance moves from a few decades ago. 6 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt BB9DA521-BDAC-44E4-9BAA-0040527486EE 093 Planning For Our Future When you go out to your favorite club to go dancing and you see a couple of older Lesbians out on the dance floor looking like they're having seizures...there's no need to panic. Don't try to stuff a wallet in their mouths to keep them from swallowing their tongues. We're just dusting off their dance moves from a few decades ago. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 10:35 yes It's important to know when to say when. You have to know when to stop bringing home rescued pets and homeless pets, so that you don't risk having to find a new home for for both of you. That's when people such as Karma Rescue step in and help out to bring those pets back to good health and to find them a new home. 2 Aug 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-08-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1126867D-B474-4B74-9EBA-F0D475BD5A19 092 Sucker It's important to know when to say when. You have to know when to stop bringing home rescued pets and homeless pets, so that you don't risk having to find a new home for for both of you. That's when people such as Karma Rescue step in and help out to bring those pets back to good health and to find them a new home. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 11:32 yes Just because you scream out the name of the Lord while having sex doesn't necesarily mean that you've got religion. It could actually mean that you're losing your religion right at that very moment. It's an added bonus when your mother hears it and finds out at the very same time. That way you don't have to go through the agony of breaking her heart later. 30 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A1862A5B-6439-4AC8-A98C-4C40258FFA5D 091 Losing My Religion Just because you scream out the name of the Lord while having sex doesn't necesarily mean that you've got religion. It could actually mean that you're losing your religion right at that very moment. It's an added bonus when your mother hears it and finds out at the very same time. That way you don't have to go through the agony of breaking her heart later. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 15:22 yes Driving while you're drowsy can be very dangerous, indeed. Once again, we're here to help, with techniques designed to keep you wide awake on your next long drive. Roxanne's nephew, Ben, joins us for a visit and some helpful hints. 28 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 127C4341-D39A-42D5-8FBF-74B93F02D1C4 090 Asleep at the Wheel Driving while you're drowsy can be very dangerous, indeed. Once again, we're here to help, with techniques designed to keep you wide awake on your next long drive. Roxanne's nephew, Ben, joins us for a visit and some helpful hints. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke 08:31 yes The times in your life that you look back on and remember forever are those good times you spent together with close family and loved ones. It's the vacations you took together, the time you spent hanging out, and all the new experiences you shared for the very first time together. What you didn't expect is that one of those moments would also include you seeing a real live penis for the very first time. 25 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt F602CE4E-B1F2-495A-A7A3-1D249C2CA4C5 089 Baby's First Penis The times in your life that you look back on and remember forever are those good times you spent together with close family and loved ones. It's the vacations you took together, the time you spent hanging out, and all the new experiences you shared for the very first time together. What you didn't expect is that one of those moments would also include you seeing a real live penis for the very first time. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 14:04 yes If you can't work for the "man" any longer, a good career alternative is to become the "man". It's time to explore your entrepreneurial side as Roxanne considers career options for the future. 23 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt DA84CED6-633B-4E21-9B00-FD1818899CA8 088 Entrepreneurial Lesbians If you can't work for the "man" any longer, a good career alternative is to become the "man". It's time to explore your entrepreneurial side as Roxanne considers career options for the future. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 12:06 no No parent ever believes that their angelic child would learn to do naughty things or to pick up bad habits on their own. If their child picked up smoking, started cussing or even became a Lesbian, it must be some other kid's fault. We finally find out the answer to this enduring mystery about whose fault it really is. We 've found the person to blame for everything. 20 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt EEBBB595-1C73-4FFF-B527-E108E22A8CB3 087 It's All My Fault No parent ever believes that their angelic child would learn to do naughty things or to pick up bad habits on their own. If their child picked up smoking, started cussing or even became a Lesbian, it must be some other kid's fault. We finally find out the answer to this enduring mystery about whose fault it really is. We 've found the person to blame for everything. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:04 no Going to church just isn't what it used to be. Now they have full-length concerts with a full band and Gay back up singers, videos with the words roll across the the TV so that you can sing along with the bouncing ball, and they have Ad Libs you can work on throughout the sermon to keep it interesting. With all that going on, how is it possible that anyone could get irate in the middle of all that love, kindness and happiness? 18 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 0ADD855B-8333-4ED8-8DBE-A94E2E7C3DE1 086 Gay on Sunday Going to church just isn't what it used to be. Now they have full-length concerts with a full band and Gay back up singers, videos with the words roll across the the TV so that you can sing along with the bouncing ball, and they have Ad Libs you can work on throughout the sermon to keep it interesting. With all that going on, how is it possible that anyone could get irate in the middle of all that love, kindness and happiness? 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:46 no Roxanne's niece comes bursting out of the closet, and now we have lots more room in there to put away all those winter coats and jackets. On a somewhat related note, if someone named "Gangsta Gramma" tries to be your friend on MySpace, make sure you just say "no". 14 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 77450CA9-D5EE-49F7-B76E-3428F33E6C1A 085 Two and a Half Homos Roxanne's niece comes bursting out of the closet, and now we have lots more room in there to put away all those winter coats and jackets. On a somewhat related note, if someone named "Gangsta Gramma" tries to be your friend on MySpace, make sure you just say "no". 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 17:42 no It's not that adults don't understand MySpace...it's just that we don't know have a clue what we're doing and how to set it up. One thing I do understand, however, is that if I ever find myself out of Roxanne's "top eight", I'll know that we've broken up and it's time for me to move out of the house. Check out our MySpace page and become our friend! 11 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt B317C51C-5C9D-4F04-AEA5-FB98DEED2790 084 MySpace Virgins It's not that adults don't understand MySpace...it's just that we don't know have a clue what we're doing and how to set it up. One thing I do understand, however, is that if I ever find myself out of Roxanne's "top eight", I'll know that we've broken up and it's time for me to move out of the house. Check out our MySpace page and become our friend! 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:25 no When you're new to a town and you're just getting started on the road to coming out, it's good to have a caring supportive guide to help you out. It's better to ease into a new lifestyle, rather than having someone drag you to a fetish club with people giving lap dances and stripping for free drinks. Of course...some people may actually appreciate that. 8 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 81603E48-1751-4147-B13F-9536635AEC40 083 Fetishes 'R Us When you're new to a town and you're just getting started on the road to coming out, it's good to have a caring supportive guide to help you out. It's better to ease into a new lifestyle, rather than having someone drag you to a fetish club with people giving lap dances and stripping for free drinks. Of course...some people may actually appreciate that. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 17:37 no Nothing could be more enjoyable or relaxing than driving around in beautiful, sunny LA weather with the top down in a brand new convertible. It's all fun and games until the gang-banger jumps in the car with you at a red light with a carload of people chasing him following right behind. 6 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 75B84A08-036B-40A6-813E-C4042F948BD5 082 Drive My Car Nothing could be more enjoyable or relaxing than driving around in beautiful, sunny LA weather with the top down in a brand new convertible. It's all fun and games until the gang-banger jumps in the car with you at a red light with a carload of people chasing him following right behind. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:48 no Sleeping should be relaxing and restful...a time for peaceful and pleasant dreams. You don't want to find yourself at the beach, in Las Vegas, standing in a hotel lobby with your girlfriend's new sex partner...while her mother looks on and smiles. 3 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 89C90016-1409-4911-ACB0-46D7361797C7 081 Sweet Dreams Sleeping should be relaxing and restful...a time for peaceful and pleasant dreams. You don't want to find yourself at the beach, in Las Vegas, standing in a hotel lobby with your girlfriend's new sex partner...while her mother looks on and smiles. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 07:19 no You can take the girl out of the disco, but you can't take the disco out of the girl. It's Disco Saturday Night and everyone has taken their Geritol and arthritis pills so that they can blow out a hip on the way to disco nirvana. 1 Jul 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-07-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 039EDB7B-42A1-4429-98F7-73149B9A13FA 080 Disco Lesbians You can take the girl out of the disco, but you can't take the disco out of the girl. It's Disco Saturday Night and everyone has taken their Geritol and arthritis pills so that they can blow out a hip on the way to disco nirvana. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 17:36 no What's an older Lesbian doing with an under-age, teenage girl at Los Angeles Gay Pride -- holding hands and buying her temporary tattoos, jewelry, Diet Coke's and anything else she wants? If it's Roxanne, then she's out with her niece showing her how the Gay community celebrates Pride. 28 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1C02EA5C-8C34-469D-9064-326423EC7634 079 Sugar Mama What's an older Lesbian doing with an under-age, teenage girl at Los Angeles Gay Pride -- holding hands and buying her temporary tattoos, jewelry, Diet Coke's and anything else she wants? If it's Roxanne, then she's out with her niece showing her how the Gay community celebrates Pride. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:43 no Those Gays are up to something, and it takes an undercover reporter to get to the truth about what really goes on at Gay Pride in San Diego. To do the job right takes plenty of hands on research, including hours spent at the S&M tent to make sure you understand how it's done, and careful monitoring of the Pride Parade, including trying to get a picture of the man on roller blades in a body thong. It's also important to inspect the free packets of lube and 19 different types of condoms so that you don't miss a single clue. 25 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-25.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 4815FB08-8D87-4B03-B569-088469E3C541 078 Top Secret: The Gay Agenda Those Gays are up to something, and it takes an undercover reporter to get to the truth about what really goes on at Gay Pride in San Diego. To do the job right takes plenty of hands on research, including hours spent at the S&M tent to make sure you understand how it's done, and careful monitoring of the Pride Parade, including trying to get a picture of the man on roller blades in a body thong. It's also important to inspect the free packets of lube and 19 different types of condoms so that you don't miss a single clue. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 14:47 no We cover the world of roommates who are leeches and girlfriends who are ATM machines. Slide the credit card between her breasts and watch the money come out the other end. 22 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt DF7B8E21-99B2-4E92-A350-0B46E8D76BA6 077 Female Leeches and Other Parasites We cover the world of roommates who are leeches and girlfriends who are ATM machines. Slide the credit card between her breasts and watch the money come out the other end. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:40 no Roxanne comes down with a summer cold. Instead of getting sympathy, orange juice, throat lozenges or a soft box of tissues....Roxanne is exiled to the guest bedroom. Even the dogs don't want to be in the same room with her. 20 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 777EFFB6-AEE6-4137-A28D-E7328C5CA2E4 076 Sick, Sick, Sick Roxanne comes down with a summer cold. Instead of getting sympathy, orange juice, throat lozenges or a soft box of tissues....Roxanne is exiled to the guest bedroom. Even the dogs don't want to be in the same room with her. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:55 no Summer means it's time to be fashionable, ladies, and Tyra says that handkerchiefs are "in" for this season. Before you just shove your favorite bandana into your back pocket there are some things you need to know, however. Picking the wrong color and putting it in the wrong pocket with the knot going the wrong way can have someone tying you up, shrimping your toes and trying to shave you if you're not careful. We're here to help. 17 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7E64B0FA-B0C3-44D6-A920-2F2F3EF184A6 075 Hanky Panky Summer means it's time to be fashionable, ladies, and Tyra says that handkerchiefs are "in" for this season. Before you just shove your favorite bandana into your back pocket there are some things you need to know, however. Picking the wrong color and putting it in the wrong pocket with the knot going the wrong way can have someone tying you up, shrimping your toes and trying to shave you if you're not careful. We're here to help. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:25 yes Roxanne had the "experience of a lifetime" on ALC6, but the memories of her best friend, Sybil will be what she remembers the most. We also learn that professional people can sometimes date crazies, too. Join us on this last installment from our series on ALC6. 15 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 8BF36F8D-580C-4C32-B552-562BCDA0B2DD 074 Riding Shotgun With Sybil Roxanne had the "experience of a lifetime" on ALC6, but the memories of her best friend, Sybil will be what she remembers the most. We also learn that professional people can sometimes date crazies, too. Join us on this last installment from our series on ALC6. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:17 yes You might be a Lesbian if...When you go through airport security and set off the alarm, the security guard asks you to step through the screening area a second time while asking you if perhaps you are wearing something metal...such as a big ol' belt buckle. 12 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 2C88E4CE-65A3-447E-A20A-873E3CDBDD98 073 Dyke Spotting You might be a Lesbian if...When you go through airport security and set off the alarm, the security guard asks you to step through the screening area a second time while asking you if perhaps you are wearing something metal...such as a big ol' belt buckle. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 15:23 yes When going to work means strapping on a toolbelt, putting on a uniform or slipping into the latest style of color coordinated, polyester track suit, you can be sure that you're in one of today's hottest careers for Lesbians. We review all the options for young Lesbians just starting out, and pay homage to UPS Lesbians everywhere. 10 Jun 2007 19:12:27 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-06-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 4FC554F1-632F-45C6-AA28-E2A2D471C0DB 072 Careers For Lesbians When going to work means strapping on a toolbelt, putting on a uniform or slipping into the latest style of color coordinated, polyester track suit, you can be sure that you're in one of today's hottest careers for Lesbians. We review all the options for young Lesbians just starting out, and pay homage to UPS Lesbians everywhere. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:16 yes Today's the day. We're off to San Francisco to start our jouney on ALC 6. The 2 Homos will be gone for the week, but we'll be back with more shows and a whole lot more stories after that. If you've missed some of our earlier shows, now is a good time to dip into the archives and get caught up. See ya in about a week! 22 May 2008 04:36:08 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 2607F092-47A9-4E44-AEB0-150F88BA10B6 071 Two Homos Hit the Road Today's the day. We're off to San Francisco to start our jouney on ALC 6. The 2 Homos will be gone for the week, but we'll be back with more shows and a whole lot more stories after that. If you've missed some of our earlier shows, now is a good time to dip into the archives and get caught up. See ya in about a week! 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 04:10 yes It never occurred to me that I would live in a house where I'd have to worry about the toilet seat being up when I go to the bathroom. Now that the P-Mate's have arrived...the toilet seat being up is a hazard I may just have to live with. Roxanne has discovered that it's not only convenient to pee standing up, but it's a lot of fun, too. 30 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 8C9E4125-1FE0-4183-98F7-EE54DAE829C2 070 The P-Mate's Have Arrived! It never occurred to me that I would live in a house where I'd have to worry about the toilet seat being up when I go to the bathroom. Now that the P-Mate's have arrived...the toilet seat being up is a hazard I may just have to live with. Roxanne has discovered that it's not only convenient to pee standing up, but it's a lot of fun, too. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:05 yes It's time to go back to school to earn your honorary Lesbian degree. Before you get ready to take that test, however, let us walk you through some important vocabulary lessons with words and expressions you'll need to know. Thanks to Kathy Belge for her list at Lesbian Life to help make us the smartest Lesbians on the planet. 28 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt F97E7BF4-8A45-4836-BB9C-BA6F1757F79A 069 Lesbian Vocabulary Lessons It's time to go back to school to earn your honorary Lesbian degree. Before you get ready to take that test, however, let us walk you through some important vocabulary lessons with words and expressions you'll need to know. Thanks to Kathy Belge for her list at Lesbian Life to help make us the smartest Lesbians on the planet. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 15:11 yes Poultry flavored toothbrush, $29.50...canine catheterization, $25.77...big steel clanging neuticles to make your toy poodle look as tough as a pit bull as he walks down the street...priceless. 25 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 626E9836-7480-4E20-B42D-9F7B8673C67E 068 Day at the Vet's Poultry flavored toothbrush, $29.50...canine catheterization, $25.77...big steel clanging neuticles to make your toy poodle look as tough as a pit bull as he walks down the street...priceless. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:08 yes It happens only once a year. Paris meets California at the Orange County Swap Meet for Fashion Week. Roxanne is there with all the color commentary and sightings of this year's most stylish couture. 23 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt C5E86785-7D96-49DD-9932-A5DA01D8EF65 067 Fashion Week at the Swap Meet It happens only once a year. Paris meets California at the Orange County Swap Meet for Fashion Week. Roxanne is there with all the color commentary and sightings of this year's most stylish couture. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:26 yes Costco doesn't sponsor us...but maybe they should. They can always count on us for helping to drive the stock price higher with our toilet paper purchases and our constant need to purchase more dog beds. If we ever move out of the area, Costco will almost certainly need to close down the Burbank location due to a unforseen drop in sales volume. 21 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 3F65A5CA-6F1D-4583-B6D3-CFFACFA4EE23 066 Costco Doesn't Sponsor Us Costco doesn't sponsor us...but maybe they should. They can always count on us for helping to drive the stock price higher with our toilet paper purchases and our constant need to purchase more dog beds. If we ever move out of the area, Costco will almost certainly need to close down the Burbank location due to a unforseen drop in sales volume. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:02 yes It's not easy to face your fears. It takes courage, determination and a willingness to let go of the old habits that hold you back. Roxanne takes a bold step forward to overcome her fear of vegetables this weekend as she musters up all her strength to attend the Strawberry Festival...even if strawberries are not a vegetable. 19 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt FCE8CEA3-5163-4C2E-AC78-235654268FD4 065 Vagitarians It's not easy to face your fears. It takes courage, determination and a willingness to let go of the old habits that hold you back. Roxanne takes a bold step forward to overcome her fear of vegetables this weekend as she musters up all her strength to attend the Strawberry Festival...even if strawberries are not a vegetable. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:06 yes Bad customer service has become a way of life in America. In fact, we've become so good at it that we've decided that the global economy is a good way for us to teach other countries how to give shitty customer service, too. After all, why should we be selfish and keep it all to ourselves? 17 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt D19B666E-F520-4651-BF90-07416673D0BB 064 Customer Service Sucks Bad customer service has become a way of life in America. In fact, we've become so good at it that we've decided that the global economy is a good way for us to teach other countries how to give shitty customer service, too. After all, why should we be selfish and keep it all to ourselves? 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 15:27 yes Fires raced across two areas of Los Angeles last week. Roxanne thinks it's the work of twisted pyromaniacs, but Virginia is convinced that the Griffith Park fire was started by a meth-head cruising for a blow job in the park. As for the Catalina fire, we're both convinced that the fire is a sure sign for the woman about to get married in Catalina that she really shouldn't get married at all. It's a sign that she should come out as a Lesbian instead. 14 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt D695A94F-F5F3-4D89-A847-CC95A572B285 063 The Burning Bush Fires raced across two areas of Los Angeles last week. Roxanne thinks it's the work of twisted pyromaniacs, but Virginia is convinced that the Griffith Park fire was started by a meth-head cruising for a blow job in the park. As for the Catalina fire, we're both convinced that the fire is a sure sign for the woman about to get married in Catalina that she really shouldn't get married at all. It's a sign that she should come out as a Lesbian instead. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:05 yes The fascists of political correctness set their sites on a stereotypical, older, white male and prepare to fire. As champions of the cause, they come out with both guns blaring and project all their baggage about how he doesn't respect or acknowledge gay relationships. What they didn't know...is that this particular older white man is Roxanne's Dad. 12 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 84C85450-9C09-4305-8DBE-54710D55E247 062 One Gay Son and a Pair of Dykes The fascists of political correctness set their sites on a stereotypical, older, white male and prepare to fire. As champions of the cause, they come out with both guns blaring and project all their baggage about how he doesn't respect or acknowledge gay relationships. What they didn't know...is that this particular older white man is Roxanne's Dad. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 07:11 yes Good relationships take balance, cooperation and joint responsiblity for household chores. Everyone has their job to do, whether it means obsessively vacuuming up dog hair, taking out trash barrels filled with dog shit, or simply emptying out trash cans on the neighbor's lawn. 10 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 30792C21-0C6B-4E25-BD71-C7453C94982A 061 Secrets to a Happy Relationship Good relationships take balance, cooperation and joint responsiblity for household chores. Everyone has their job to do, whether it means obsessively vacuuming up dog hair, taking out trash barrels filled with dog shit, or simply emptying out trash cans on the neighbor's lawn. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:14 yes When it comes to your very best friends, you want to make sure you pick out a special gift that they will remember forever. Ideally, it will be something they can reminisce about and talk about for years to come. So, the next time a special occasion rolls around and you need to pick out a gift for someone special, we're here for you. 8 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 89076098-4A90-4AF7-8E4B-FCC6EF79AC79 060 Let's Go Shopping When it comes to your very best friends, you want to make sure you pick out a special gift that they will remember forever. Ideally, it will be something they can reminisce about and talk about for years to come. So, the next time a special occasion rolls around and you need to pick out a gift for someone special, we're here for you. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:55 yes You Googled MILF because your membership in the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) expired and you wanted to find their web site. What came up instead was the Wikipedia entry for MILF: 1. (slang) Mother I'd like to fuck: A mother found sexually attractive. 6 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 4066B29E-3447-49D8-8470-5B6AADF25390 059 MILF's You Googled MILF because your membership in the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) expired and you wanted to find their web site. What came up instead was the Wikipedia entry for MILF: 1. (slang) Mother I'd like to fuck: A mother found sexually attractive. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:12 yes Take one part stupid, two parts ignorant and three parts asshole. Stir ingredients vigorously with middle finger until good and frothy. Bake in the Los Angeles freeway system for 45 minutes, and you're got a nice, steaming plate of Road Rage. Serves four. 4 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 309649EE-F180-4C9E-BEC4-2DA048C6536A 058 Road Rage Take one part stupid, two parts ignorant and three parts asshole. Stir ingredients vigorously with middle finger until good and frothy. Bake in the Los Angeles freeway system for 45 minutes, and you're got a nice, steaming plate of Road Rage. Serves four. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:46 yes On your birthday you always get to be princess for a day. Of course, it wouldn't be fair to those around you who might not be around to celebrate for just that one day. That's why you have to celebrate your birthday week and maybe even your birthday month as well. Next year, why not just go for the gusto and call it your birthday year. 2 May 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-05-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 680AF8D3-399B-4817-ACEC-B9B1CD20FCE7 057 Happy Birthday On your birthday you always get to be princess for a day. Of course, it wouldn't be fair to those around you who might not be around to celebrate for just that one day. That's why you have to celebrate your birthday week and maybe even your birthday month as well. Next year, why not just go for the gusto and call it your birthday year. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:09 yes Take a ride with Roxanne as she gets ready for ALC 6 on a training day designed to give the volunteers and the cyclists an idea of what it will be like on an actual day of on the event itself. Roxanne is awed by the way the cyclists pull together to help each other up the long, steep hills, and she is blown away by the inspirational qualities of disco music, even among a generation that grew up with Milli Vanilli. 28 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt E4943893-C127-49F4-B78B-41DD6B2E66A3 056 Lazy Pieces of Shit Take a ride with Roxanne as she gets ready for ALC 6 on a training day designed to give the volunteers and the cyclists an idea of what it will be like on an actual day of on the event itself. Roxanne is awed by the way the cyclists pull together to help each other up the long, steep hills, and she is blown away by the inspirational qualities of disco music, even among a generation that grew up with Milli Vanilli. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:50 yes For seven days this coming June, Roxanne and Virginia will be volunteering to support the more than 2,000 riders and 500 volunteer roadies on the AIDS Life Cycle 6 cycling event to raise money for AIDS care. This is Roxanne's maiden voyage on the event and Virginia's 13th time as either a volunteer or a cyclist. ALC is a 585 mile bicycle ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles to support the HIV services of the LA Gay & Lesbian Center and the San Francisco AIDS Foundation. Help Roxanne meet her fundraising goal by clicking on the link to the right. 27 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt E8D53843-B5DE-4D09-A741-F9FA1CCDB610 055 AIDS LifeCycle 6 For seven days this coming June, Roxanne and Virginia will be volunteering to support the more than 2,000 riders and 500 volunteer roadies on the AIDS Life Cycle 6 cycling event to raise money for AIDS care. This is Roxanne's maiden voyage on the event and Virginia's 13th time as either a volunteer or a cyclist. ALC is a 585 mile bicycle ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles to support the HIV services of the LA Gay & Lesbian Center and the San Francisco AIDS Foundation. Help Roxanne meet her fundraising goal by clicking on the link to the right. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:12 yes We all had them the first time around, but only those with a real sense of style and class were bold enough to get in on the most recent mullet craze. Apparently, we have to get out more. 25 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt DB00D6B7-3CF7-4933-8B09-ED004607DF7E 054 Got Mullet? We all had them the first time around, but only those with a real sense of style and class were bold enough to get in on the most recent mullet craze. Apparently, we have to get out more. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:53 yes One more with our friends from Nor Cal... It's everything you ever wanted to know about exes. Learn what it takes to make sure you never have to bump into your ex unexpectedly in public, learn how to deal with a constellation of exes at a party, and learn how to make sure that none of them ever sleep with each other and become each others exes. 21 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-20.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 9F10AB96-373F-4853-8DA5-C70C33AA5B88 053 The Definitive Guide to Exes One more with our friends from Nor Cal... It's everything you ever wanted to know about exes. Learn what it takes to make sure you never have to bump into your ex unexpectedly in public, learn how to deal with a constellation of exes at a party, and learn how to make sure that none of them ever sleep with each other and become each others exes. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:47 yes When you're picking out pajamas, it's important to match the tops and bottoms. The same holds true for relationships. You carefully read the label to make sure you know exactly what you're buying, but when you get her home and open her box, you realize that it was all just false advertising. Our friends from Northern California join us for a chat. 19 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 0DABEE60-8A79-464B-8204-3BF2D027A307 052 False Advertising When you're picking out pajamas, it's important to match the tops and bottoms. The same holds true for relationships. You carefully read the label to make sure you know exactly what you're buying, but when you get her home and open her box, you realize that it was all just false advertising. Our friends from Northern California join us for a chat. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:27 yes Roxanne's mommy comes over for a vist and tells us what it was like for her when she found out Roxanne was gay. She also shares a secret from her past when she was hit on by a Lesbian who wanted her to move in with her that very night. The only thing that's changed between now and then is that Lesbians at least wait until the second date to bring the U-Haul. 17 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 298474FC-9F9C-4FFB-9C9E-96F11998A5D3 051 Roxi's Mommy Roxanne's mommy comes over for a vist and tells us what it was like for her when she found out Roxanne was gay. She also shares a secret from her past when she was hit on by a Lesbian who wanted her to move in with her that very night. The only thing that's changed between now and then is that Lesbians at least wait until the second date to bring the U-Haul. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:01 yes When it comes to food, Roxanne is not the most adventurous person on the planet. But, she does understand that maintaining a healthy relationship takes a little bit of compromise, mixed with a touch of flexibility and the desire to step out of your comfort zone once in a while. She also knows when to say...enough is enough. 15 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 784FFD0C-E1A4-4ACC-B347-812DD287212D 050 Adventures in Dining When it comes to food, Roxanne is not the most adventurous person on the planet. But, she does understand that maintaining a healthy relationship takes a little bit of compromise, mixed with a touch of flexibility and the desire to step out of your comfort zone once in a while. She also knows when to say...enough is enough. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:07 yes You never know when that next big earthquake is going to strike. If tonight is the night the "Big One" happens, and the house falls down and crushes the computer, this may very well be our last podcast. Of course, if you're reading this page and listening to this podcast...then things probably didn't really go down that way. 13 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-12.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 39F194E8-89EA-485C-B990-CEDEC07CF9F6 049 The Last Podcast You never know when that next big earthquake is going to strike. If tonight is the night the "Big One" happens, and the house falls down and crushes the computer, this may very well be our last podcast. Of course, if you're reading this page and listening to this podcast...then things probably didn't really go down that way. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:29 yes It's time to dispel some myths. Not every straight girl is a Lesbian's wet dream. And, just because someone tells you that you have a cute purse...it doesn't mean they're trying to pick you up. 11 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 30016C65-5633-463E-BF5C-EDFA6834E25D 048 Straight Girls Behaving Badly It's time to dispel some myths. Not every straight girl is a Lesbian's wet dream. And, just because someone tells you that you have a cute purse...it doesn't mean they're trying to pick you up. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:46 yes It starts off innocently enough when you get the new girlfriend. At first you want to spend every moment together, then you forget about all your old friends, then you start wearing her clothes...and before you know it, you have the same haircut. You've become the Lesbian Clones. 9 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-08.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1FB43105-BC0D-4B82-B7C9-8B6BDEEA59D0 047 Clones It starts off innocently enough when you get the new girlfriend. At first you want to spend every moment together, then you forget about all your old friends, then you start wearing her clothes...and before you know it, you have the same haircut. You've become the Lesbian Clones. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:24 yes There's nothing like a nice, relaxing day out at sea on a boat fishing. That is, unless you spend the day blowing chunks off the side of the boat and still have to hose it down to clean it off when you're done. 7 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 45948625-30E4-4DAC-8CE6-8BF3EBDDC6B4 046 Lesbians at Sea There's nothing like a nice, relaxing day out at sea on a boat fishing. That is, unless you spend the day blowing chunks off the side of the boat and still have to hose it down to clean it off when you're done. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:15 yes It happens to all of us. We're innocently checking the mail, and there it it...the dreaded jury duty notice. As the panic spreads through your veins, do you think about running it through the paper shredder to pretend you never got it? Do you toss it into the street and hope that it gets sucked into the sewers? Do you make endless excuses and continue to reschedule until the end of your life? Or, do you step up to the plate like Roxanne, and perform your civic duty like a true American hero! 5 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 686E7154-9F2F-4031-955F-3A554E098DE6 045 Jury Duty It happens to all of us. We're innocently checking the mail, and there it it...the dreaded jury duty notice. As the panic spreads through your veins, do you think about running it through the paper shredder to pretend you never got it? Do you toss it into the street and hope that it gets sucked into the sewers? Do you make endless excuses and continue to reschedule until the end of your life? Or, do you step up to the plate like Roxanne, and perform your civic duty like a true American hero! 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:12 yes When we were younger, we would always see those scary, older Lesbians out at the bars and think, "ewwwwww". Somehow the tables have turned, and now we are those scary Lesbians. That still doesn't stop us from being the pigs we always were. 2 Apr 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-04-01.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 46508C6E-9497-4471-A685-4E0AA4AE794D 044 Sausage Tits When we were younger, we would always see those scary, older Lesbians out at the bars and think, "ewwwwww". Somehow the tables have turned, and now we are those scary Lesbians. That still doesn't stop us from being the pigs we always were. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:04 yes Remember when life used to be fun? Travel back in time with us to the time when it was ok to put on a thick layer of baby oil and sit in the sun all day, when you could sit in your room and lick the walls with lead paint, and it was perfectly fine to ride in the back of a Ford Pinto. 31 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-30.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7DB0D7DB-0D69-438D-9049-6F6512E7160B 043 Back in the Day Remember when life used to be fun? Travel back in time with us to the time when it was ok to put on a thick layer of baby oil and sit in the sun all day, when you could sit in your room and lick the walls with lead paint, and it was perfectly fine to ride in the back of a Ford Pinto. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 07:43 yes As Lesbians, it's our civic duty to do an "L Word" podcast. In fact, I think it may be written into law somehwere. So, here it is. 29 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7F4938E4-A3C1-4A9E-AA71-D77B4B5D9B76 042 The L Word Wrap-up As Lesbians, it's our civic duty to do an "L Word" podcast. In fact, I think it may be written into law somehwere. So, here it is. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:58 yes In a new relationship it's important to understand the boundary between intimacy and over-sharing. Apparently, this can still be an issue for couples that have been together for a while. It seems that Roxanne and I still haven't found that perfect balance yet. 27 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 5B3E0050-6B9D-4BF4-B0EB-4EFE7F5AE200 041 Let's Get Personal In a new relationship it's important to understand the boundary between intimacy and over-sharing. Apparently, this can still be an issue for couples that have been together for a while. It seems that Roxanne and I still haven't found that perfect balance yet. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:53 yes Roxanne goes on-line for a bit of web surfing, and gets stalked by on-line predators as she innocently tries to play Trendetta, her favorite video game. The tweens educate her on how to fight back. I'm not sure I can leave her alone with the internet any more. 25 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 5F607E34-986B-4EBB-9B0F-8939C6BE56A5 040 On-line Predators Roxanne goes on-line for a bit of web surfing, and gets stalked by on-line predators as she innocently tries to play Trendetta, her favorite video game. The tweens educate her on how to fight back. I'm not sure I can leave her alone with the internet any more. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:16 yes Walk that fine line with us between fan and stalker as we discuss Roxanne's latest Tivo adventure, "For the Love of Dolly". I'm off to lick Roxanne's seatbelt right now. 23 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt AA97714D-D902-4418-85FA-3A84B25B555F 039 For the Love of Dolly Walk that fine line with us between fan and stalker as we discuss Roxanne's latest Tivo adventure, "For the Love of Dolly". I'm off to lick Roxanne's seatbelt right now. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:19 yes You can have a good time with her, you can take her all around the town, and you can even take her home with you. There's just one rule you have to remember....you never date the whore. And, no matter what else happens...never, ever marry the whore! 20 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-19.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 196080E5-AA1E-4E2B-A6E8-732D00439AE1 038 Never Date the Whore You can have a good time with her, you can take her all around the town, and you can even take her home with you. There's just one rule you have to remember....you never date the whore. And, no matter what else happens...never, ever marry the whore! 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 12:41 yes It takes skill, intuition and a special kind of "know-how" to pick out the perfect pet. These are qualities that we have in spades. So, if you need some help...feel free to ask us. 19 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 22E2F5BC-0F4F-46F2-A4F6-7352CA9FD278 037 Neurotic Times Three It takes skill, intuition and a special kind of "know-how" to pick out the perfect pet. These are qualities that we have in spades. So, if you need some help...feel free to ask us. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:16 yes By the time the plane sets down in the Bahamas, Roxanne's gaydar is already kicking into overdrive as she works on collecting all the gay people in the airport terminal who are on their way to our hotel. Before we were on vacation for even 24 hours, she had already formed the Gay Mafia that would become our travel companions for the rest of the trip. 17 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 59155E89-57F0-4AF6-A67F-BF60A410539D 036 The Gay Mafia in the Bahamas By the time the plane sets down in the Bahamas, Roxanne's gaydar is already kicking into overdrive as she works on collecting all the gay people in the airport terminal who are on their way to our hotel. Before we were on vacation for even 24 hours, she had already formed the Gay Mafia that would become our travel companions for the rest of the trip. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 25:56 yes We're off to the Bahamas for a few days of rest and relaxation. That makes it a good time to dip into the archives to listen to some of the previous shows you may have missed. More stories when we get back! 12 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-11.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 03B32A35-293C-4890-A2C7-D48850B3E21E 035 Bahama Mamas We're off to the Bahamas for a few days of rest and relaxation. That makes it a good time to dip into the archives to listen to some of the previous shows you may have missed. More stories when we get back! 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:33 yes How does someone go from a freak factor 7 to a freak factor 9.5 in under 2 hours? Listen in to find out. 11 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 597F8C1D-EFC6-495F-BA33-BBAB7FAC4C26 034 Freak Factor 7 How does someone go from a freak factor 7 to a freak factor 9.5 in under 2 hours? Listen in to find out. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:41 yes Your bones start to creak, your hearing goes bad, and wrinkles come out everywhere. Just when you think it can't get any worse...a grey pubic hair appears out of nowhwere. Getting old sucks. 10 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 2500DBFF-3E18-4496-8523-8DBCCF24557A 033 Getting Old Sucks Your bones start to creak, your hearing goes bad, and wrinkles come out everywhere. Just when you think it can't get any worse...a grey pubic hair appears out of nowhwere. Getting old sucks. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:09 yes The best gift for some can be the worst nightmare for others. After bringing the Tivo in to the house, the TV is now off limits for Virginia as Roxanne works overtime to tape every show ever made, and to make it all fit on only a 40-hour Tivo. 8 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-07.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 81FDE9B4-C8B0-4C93-A9D3-30067BDA46EC 032 The Great Tivo Debate The best gift for some can be the worst nightmare for others. After bringing the Tivo in to the house, the TV is now off limits for Virginia as Roxanne works overtime to tape every show ever made, and to make it all fit on only a 40-hour Tivo. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:32 yes Now you can pee by the side of the road, write your name in the snow or just drain the turtle standing up. They also make great party favors. Order yours today at www.dontsquat.com 6 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-05.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 8517006F-9875-4BCE-9E4E-3CA1442232DF 031 P-Mate Now you can pee by the side of the road, write your name in the snow or just drain the turtle standing up. They also make great party favors. Order yours today at www.dontsquat.com 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 07:11 yes It's the beginning of the month. That makes it the perfect time for us to review our monthly horoscopes to see what kind of month we're going to have. Sound like it's shaping up to be a fun-filled one with new partners and a 3.5 week romance for each of us. Don't forget the dental dams. 4 Mar 2007 05:20:48 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-03-03.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 5AC2DD8F-0948-4873-8C6B-EC6B8DD001A3 030 Signs of the Zodiac It's the beginning of the month. That makes it the perfect time for us to review our monthly horoscopes to see what kind of month we're going to have. Sound like it's shaping up to be a fun-filled one with new partners and a 3.5 week romance for each of us. Don't forget the dental dams. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 05:32 yes Roxanne finds a new restaurant that she likes more than McDonald's. As we make the trek out to Cafe Beaujolais, we wind up getting more than just something good to eat. The evening turns out to a be a real treat, with both dinner and a show. 22 May 2008 04:44:43 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-28.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 7E2E5B8E-5EBA-44D2-B151-FA92541BF1EC 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:17 yes It used to be that you only had to choose between small, medium, large and x-large. Today these kids have so many new labels that it's hard to keep up. It's a good thing we have Logo, the gay PBS, to help keep us up-to-date. 28 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-27.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 6413D559-7D13-4D36-96CA-95A7A4E5A992 028 Labels It used to be that you only had to choose between small, medium, large and x-large. Today these kids have so many new labels that it's hard to keep up. It's a good thing we have Logo, the gay PBS, to help keep us up-to-date. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 08:57 yes Just telling someone that it's over is sometimes not enough. Of course, having crazy breakup sex with her right after you tossed her out isn't making the message any easier to understand. 27 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 48802B56-E16B-4618-A8EF-FE33DBA82C43 027 Breakup Sex Just telling someone that it's over is sometimes not enough. Of course, having crazy breakup sex with her right after you tossed her out isn't making the message any easier to understand. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 07:42 yes Liz stops by for a chat about what it takes to be a Real Lesbian, and let's us know that it's really not as easy as it looks. Simply owning power tools is not going to be enough to earn you a passing grade as a Real Lesbian. Find out if you have what it takes. 24 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 236958E9-6CBA-4C23-B8C5-40FA5E7BB8B9 026 The Lesbian Test Liz stops by for a chat about what it takes to be a Real Lesbian, and let's us know that it's really not as easy as it looks. Simply owning power tools is not going to be enough to earn you a passing grade as a Real Lesbian. Find out if you have what it takes. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 12:26 yes The dating world is a very treacherous place these days. Seemingly nice single girls come with all kinds of baggage, red flags and even girlfriends. Some of them still live with those girlfriends! More reasons not to break up with your current mate. 23 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt BC196A63-EB78-42D0-AE78-AFABB3E3D444 025 The Single Life The dating world is a very treacherous place these days. Seemingly nice single girls come with all kinds of baggage, red flags and even girlfriends. Some of them still live with those girlfriends! More reasons not to break up with your current mate. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:22 yes We run down our lists of who's hot, and talk about the rules of engagement if one of them should suddenly show up at the front door. After all, it's important to know ahead of time what's acceptable if Angelina Jolie accidentaly turns in to your driveway and knocks on the door ready go. 22 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt D2BD987F-8A66-4183-80D0-2E561CBADD72 024 Hot Chicks We run down our lists of who's hot, and talk about the rules of engagement if one of them should suddenly show up at the front door. After all, it's important to know ahead of time what's acceptable if Angelina Jolie accidentaly turns in to your driveway and knocks on the door ready go. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 12:40 yes Soap is available almost everwhere in the world, with only one possible exception...a 5-acre farm in the middle of Colorado. Join us for an update on Stinky! If you missed Stinky the first time, you can download or listen here. 19 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-18.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 6E490FBB-0BF2-4350-A16B-D2194CC80830 023 Stinky Update Soap is available almost everwhere in the world, with only one possible exception...a 5-acre farm in the middle of Colorado. Join us for an update on Stinky! If you missed Stinky the first time, you can download or listen here. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:43 yes The countdown to Roxanne's termination at work begins. If she so much as utters a single word that even sounds like a swear, Roxanne will be standing in the unemployment line for good. Forget the Super Bowl...now is the time to buy your squares in the pool to guess how much longer Roxanne will be able to keep her job. We take PayPal. 17 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-16.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 71C0C9E1-7721-4137-BC1F-8746C33AF74F 022 Cussin at Work The countdown to Roxanne's termination at work begins. If she so much as utters a single word that even sounds like a swear, Roxanne will be standing in the unemployment line for good. Forget the Super Bowl...now is the time to buy your squares in the pool to guess how much longer Roxanne will be able to keep her job. We take PayPal. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 12:33 yes Roxanne shares a secret. Late in the evening, when the house goes eerily quiet, Roxanne is at the computer, channeling Dr. Phil, giving advice to teenagers who are just coming out. 15 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 3DF4DD43-69BB-4414-9D07-102537378CC1 021 The Gay 90210 Roxanne shares a secret. Late in the evening, when the house goes eerily quiet, Roxanne is at the computer, channeling Dr. Phil, giving advice to teenagers who are just coming out. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 07:11 yes All it takes is an acoustic guitar, a credit card and six lessons at the gay and lesbian center with a bunch of 40-something homos...and you, too, can become the next Melissa Etheridge. 11 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt EB830D74-C53A-4D43-B178-F26F4A9EC54D 020 Becoming Melissa Etheridge All it takes is an acoustic guitar, a credit card and six lessons at the gay and lesbian center with a bunch of 40-something homos...and you, too, can become the next Melissa Etheridge. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:35 yes It was a miracle from above. After only three weeks in a hot, dark, sweaty lodge with a bunch of other "heterosexual" ministers deep in prayer and spirituality...working hard all day and all night, Ted Haggard is finally cured of his homosexual thoughts and feelings. All I can say is that they must have gone through a lot of condoms. 10 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-09.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt C94724E2-35EC-45F5-9DB7-596673B64BD2 019 Wash That Gay Right Outta My Hair It was a miracle from above. After only three weeks in a hot, dark, sweaty lodge with a bunch of other "heterosexual" ministers deep in prayer and spirituality...working hard all day and all night, Ted Haggard is finally cured of his homosexual thoughts and feelings. All I can say is that they must have gone through a lot of condoms. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:52 yes Lesbians come in all shapes, sizes, colors and varieties of comfortable shoes. We can pick each other out in a crowd or in the grocery store....unless, of course, you're in the Midwest. Then it's just a crapshoot. 5 Feb 2007 04:08:44 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-02-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 0E3C9A35-0869-4F81-829E-882A85C264D0 018 Gaydar Gone Wild Lesbians come in all shapes, sizes, colors and varieties of comfortable shoes. We can pick each other out in a crowd or in the grocery store....unless, of course, you're in the Midwest. Then it's just a crapshoot. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:13 yes It's time for more good advice from 2 Homos! When mom gets in the way of an otherwise perfectly good relationship, what's a girl to do? You can tell her to go fuck herself, have her poisoned or invite her to join you for a threesome. The possibilities are endless. 10 Jan 2007 16:14:07 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-31.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 54DB0EBF-F527-4E5B-BB1C-6DAB91C0D6F0 017 About Your Mother It's time for more good advice from 2 Homos! When mom gets in the way of an otherwise perfectly good relationship, what's a girl to do? You can tell her to go fuck herself, have her poisoned or invite her to join you for a threesome. The possibilities are endless. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 07:39 yes When you meet that special person that you know is going to be your one and only, drastic measures may be required to make sure she knows it, too. Stop at nothing to reel her in -- stalk her, invite yourself to friends' weddings that she's attending, pretend you like country western dancing, and use any deceptive ways required to lure her up to your house. 30 Jan 2007 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-29.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1CB879F6-B827-4930-AA35-ED9C9BE2EC46 016 The Day We Met When you meet that special person that you know is going to be your one and only, drastic measures may be required to make sure she knows it, too. Stop at nothing to reel her in -- stalk her, invite yourself to friends' weddings that she's attending, pretend you like country western dancing, and use any deceptive ways required to lure her up to your house. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 20:23 yes It's the worst kept secret ever. You grow up thinking you're just like everybody else, until one day it finally dawns on you... you're a big 'ol homo! And, all this time everyone knew, except for you. 25 Jan 2007 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-24.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 1D2D7B88-B307-4D33-A537-965B9256747F 015 The Last One to Know It's the worst kept secret ever. You grow up thinking you're just like everybody else, until one day it finally dawns on you... you're a big 'ol homo! And, all this time everyone knew, except for you. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:49 yes It was a mic check gone wrong. Listen in as Roxanne recounts her experiences with hairy men. 22 Jan 2007 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-21.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 378B6EBD-B070-446C-A82B-B5A040CEACEF 014 The Fur Rant It was a mic check gone wrong. Listen in as Roxanne recounts her experiences with hairy men. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 04:57 yes We head out to the mountains for a day of skiing and relaxation on our day off. Who knew that it was Baby Dyke Discount Day at the slopes? Our invitation must have gotten lost in the mail. 18 Jan 2007 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-17.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A95A1F00-30E9-4A3B-8BC7-2C1A956CC591 013 Baby Dyke Discount Day at the Slopes We head out to the mountains for a day of skiing and relaxation on our day off. Who knew that it was Baby Dyke Discount Day at the slopes? Our invitation must have gotten lost in the mail. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:28 yes It can happen in the blink of an eye, and always when you least expect it. Stealthily, the predator moves in on their target and closes in for the kill. Before you know it, the bitch has slowly moved all her things into your house, she's wearing your clothes and buying you gifts on YOUR credit card...and you never saw it coming. It's the drive-by move-in. 14 Jan 2007 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-13.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt EFAD1FB1-F681-4DB7-A4D0-221B935E7C09 012 The Drive-By Move-in It can happen in the blink of an eye, and always when you least expect it. Stealthily, the predator moves in on their target and closes in for the kill. Before you know it, the bitch has slowly moved all her things into your house, she's wearing your clothes and buying you gifts on YOUR credit card...and you never saw it coming. It's the drive-by move-in. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 16:01 yes When someone that you don't know takes the time to tell you directly that you stink and you need to take a bath, maybe you should listen to them. It's possible that the crazy person might really be you. 5 Jan 2007 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt CDB317D9-0430-4E16-AD82-3EB37EDAD318 011 Stinky Comes to Town When someone that you don't know takes the time to tell you directly that you stink and you need to take a bath, maybe you should listen to them. It's possible that the crazy person might really be you. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 12:41 yes No trip on the subway would be complete without the friendly neighborhood perv. Who needs to go the the movies when you can just take a trip on the train? Don't forget the popcorn. 3 Jan 2007 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2007-01-02.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt B6FB2B62-F582-4B21-88E6-6990E2531D04 010 New York Subway Stories No trip on the subway would be complete without the friendly neighborhood perv. Who needs to go the the movies when you can just take a trip on the train? Don't forget the popcorn. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:40 yes Meet the stripper next door, as we contemplate the best type of strip club to go to and where we'll go when we're in New York over the holidays. 24 Dec 2006 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-12-23.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt AD6241FB-F680-4C51-BCCA-DC0F3A3E2A28 009 Meet the Strippers Meet the stripper next door, as we contemplate the best type of strip club to go to and where we'll go when we're in New York over the holidays. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:04 yes Things take a serious detour for just a moment as we reminisce about coming out to the family and how it all went down. Take a listen as we travel back in time. 23 Dec 2006 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-12-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 9E76286D-E782-43B8-9202-094542F11F61 008 Coming Out Stories Things take a serious detour for just a moment as we reminisce about coming out to the family and how it all went down. Take a listen as we travel back in time. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 14:02 yes When the bitch absolutely, positively has to be gone overnight...there's only one way to get it done. More good advice to help our listeners out. 16 Dec 2006 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-12-15.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt A2499157-6461-4CF9-8F8A-1F7A9FF16F70 007 Breakup Advice When the bitch absolutely, positively has to be gone overnight...there's only one way to get it done. More good advice to help our listeners out. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:16 yes Upstairs, downstairs and all around the house -- it's hair. It comes in all different shapes, styles and colors. Find out how to style, groom and shave it to keep relationships exciting. 15 Dec 2006 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-12-14.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 30DA2B01-D7D1-4DCF-98F4-08CC42643698 006 Hair Hair Everywhere Upstairs, downstairs and all around the house -- it's hair. It comes in all different shapes, styles and colors. Find out how to style, groom and shave it to keep relationships exciting. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 10:43 yes Le'ts face it...everyone fucks up once in a while. Get some good advice before you need it and learn how to make relationships work. We're here for you. 11 Dec 2006 05:10:14 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-12-10.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 6E736B80-0461-470D-8EC9-A697D3F11830 005 Ooops, I Fucked My Girlfriend's Best Friend Le'ts face it...everyone fucks up once in a while. Get some good advice before you need it and learn how to make relationships work. We're here for you. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:44 yes The girls serve up a generous portion of party etiquette, topped with a dollop of exes. Enjoy the festive spirit, and don't forget to take notes before you attend your next social function. 7 Nov 2006 05:06:35 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-12-06.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 49570D67-F89F-4A6C-9407-662A0A664D2B 004 Party Etiquette With Crazy Exes The girls serve up a generous portion of party etiquette, topped with a dollop of exes. Enjoy the festive spirit, and don't forget to take notes before you attend your next social function. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 12:12 yes It's just not a holiday unless the front yard is littered with light up trees, twinkling reindeer and oversized gifts...and there's no room for anyone to park in the garage. 5 Dec 2006 05:03:51 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-12-04.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt CB53172C-3259-4FAF-AFB4-CB58AB238C7C 003 Holiday Intervention It's just not a holiday unless the front yard is littered with light up trees, twinkling reindeer and oversized gifts...and there's no room for anyone to park in the garage. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 09:37 yes Meet the new neighbor who decided to move in unannounced and then bring his entire family to live under our washing machine. 27 Nov 2006 04:37:20 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-11-26.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 61908F62-EED9-4CEF-8019-3C9A7F448014 002 Blackie, Our Freeloading Tenant Meet the new neighbor who decided to move in unannounced and then bring his entire family to live under our washing machine. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 11:24 yes Another weekend getaway goes awry when Southwest loses the luggage and we're stuck with only the clothes we're wearing and mp3 players in 30-degree weather. 23 Nov 2006 04:37:20 GMT http://www.2homos.com/2HOMOS-2006-11-22.mp3 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) Comedy, lesbian, gay, glbt 942053DB-BEBC-4E66-AD22-5DCF4F5D13C8 001 Fuckin' Southwest Another weekend getaway goes awry when Southwest loses the luggage and we're stuck with only the clothes we're wearing and mp3 players in 30-degree weather. 2homos@2homos.com (Roxanne and Virginia) lesbian, gay, comedy, lgbt, queer, dyke, homos, homo, 2homos 13:38 yes